Episode Report Card Aaron: C+ | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT 'Til Death Do Us Part
By Aaron | Season 1 | Episode 3 | Aired on 06.16.2001
At the funeral home, the boys all eye Mrs. Dumb warily. Both David and Federico agree that she's a "casket climber," but Nate doesn't think she looks energetic enough. Then he tries to convince David that they should discuss the Kroehner situation with Federico. Rico breaks down and confesses that the real reason he couldn't go pick up the Humpty Dumpty at the morgue was that he was meeting with Gilardi. "I have a right to consider my options," he says, and an indignant David reminds him that The Late Nate put him through mortuary school. Before this can go any further, however, Mrs. Dumb fulfills their prophecy and hurls herself screaming onto the casket, and the boys all run to pull her off.
Meanwhile, Keith and Claire decide to give up looking for the foot. He tries to give her a little pep talk about the consequences of her actions, but she shuts him up by telling him that she knows that he and her brother "are, like, gay." Keith takes it pretty calmly, and Claire asks the question that's been on the minds of the two viewers who are left watching: "What do you see in him anyway?" Keith lists off the usual reasons (smart, kind, funny, et cetera), but really it's because David is an innocent little boy. "Most of the men I meet," he admits, "well, they kind of just want me to be one thing." Claire guesses right away what that might be: "A big, black sex cop?" And yeah, that's so going to be Keith's nickname for the rest of the season, but please nobody open another thread calling me a racist or anything, because I mean it in the nicest possible way. Keith doesn't want to be that guy, and suggests that if that's what people want, they should "rent a video." Judging by the popularity of the porn postings in the Off-Topic Blather section, that does seem to be a viable alternative. "David gets me," he says. "When someone sees you as you really are, and still wants to be with you, that's powerful." Aww. Even Claire is a bit moved by that one. Keith suggests that she be a little nicer to David, because he's under a lot of stress "with that cremation place opening across the street." Claire wasn't aware of that particular piece of information, but that may be due to Foreshadowing popping out from behind a bush to smack her over the head with an anvil.
Old McFisher's. Mom is shocked to learn about her daughter's foot-stealing ways. "You wake up one day and your baby has stolen a foot. Where have I been?" she wonders. "Losing $25,000," David points out, and then Claire enters, looking forlorn. When she sees the whole family staring at her, she explains that she's had a really bad day, and then also mentions that she ran into Keith. Mom wants to know who Keith is, so David has to remind her that he's the cop she met at the funeral. Mom babbles some more, and Nate suggests therapy. For Claire, not Mom. In case you were confused. Claire tells Nate that he's not her father, a factoid which is rapidly approaching "You fucking moron" levels of repetitiveness. "If you need a project, get a dog," she suggests, but I think he'll find housebreaking Brenda to be hard enough. Especially given the previews for next week. Claire wraps the scene up by oh-so-casually letting it slip that the house across the street is on fire, and everyone runs outside to take a look. As they all stand on the lawn, watching the building burn, Claire calls out, "I guess this should solve all your problems, huh?" I don't see how, since they still have to deal with the suppliers and the health department and the undercutting competition, but whatever.