Episode Report Card Aaron: C+ | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT 'Til Death Do Us Part
By Aaron | Season 1 | Episode 3 | Aired on 06.16.2001
And finally, in a surprise ending that's not surprising at all, we cut back to the Field of Feet at dawn. Some woman is searching for her dog, and just as we're about to fade out, the dog runs up with the writer's foot planted firmly in it's mouth. And thus ends another episode of Six Feet Under. But before we go, as promised, and straight from the home office on Park Avenue in Manhattan, here's this week's Top Twelve List:
The Top Twelve Fun Things To Do With A Severed Foot12. Who cares what the rest of the world calls it. You're the one who's REALLY playing football.
11. Makes re-enacting the Godfather horse's head scene with your Brando action figure that much more realistic.
10. In a crowded elevator, pull it out of a bag and use it to smack yourself repeatedly in the head. Then exclaim, "Man, my feet are killing me!" See how many people get off at the next floor.
9. For Stephen King fans only: Think of it as packing a lunch in case you ever get stuck on a deserted island.
8. In a pinch, it can also serve as a handy back-up ruler.
7. Since I couldn't think of a clever way to work them into a sentence anywhere, I'll just say it here: Hi, Pontoon, MandaB, and TV_Buffy.
6. Order a Big Mac. When the cashier isn't looking, slip the foot between the two all-beef patties. Sue for $10 billion.
5. Makes an excellent paperweight for print-outs of the new multi-page recaps.
4. No more contorting yourself in the mirror to see if that new pair of sandals shows off your ankles well.
3. Get in touch with your inner Bobbit.
2. And let's face it -- guy or girl, gay or straight -- we've all got that one ex we'd love to mail it to, right?
1. Step One: Wear it on a chain around your neck. Step Two: Go to a bar. Step Three: There is no step three. Step Four: Use "I'm head over heels for you, baby" as a pick-up line. Step Five: Sit back, and watch the chicks come running.
Oh, and don't forget, always put your best foot forward. Also, am I the only who can't believe I made it all this way without a single hokey-pokey jokey? You put your left foot in; you put your left foot out; you put your left foot in and you shake…you know what? That's enough. See you next week.