Episode Report Card Aaron: C+ | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT 'Til Death Do Us Part
By Aaron | Season 1 | Episode 3 | Aired on 06.16.2001
The next morning, Nate comes down to visit Federico in the basement. Before they can chat, Rico's wife calls, and he has to leave to deal with her pregnancy-related raging hormones. Rico asks Nate to move Dumb onto the table, and he does, with predictably disastrous results. The bag opens, spilling pieces all over the floor, and just then Claire enters to ask Nate for advice. "I don't know if you noticed," snarks Nate, "but I'm a little busy right now, swimming in a man's guts." After grabbing something that's conveniently left off-screen, he complains, "I'm picking up a part of a person, and I don't even know what it is." Claire agrees to come back later, and as we hear Nate puking, she runs out and passes David on the steps. Remember that later, when they show this in flashback. Anyway, David enters the basement and finds Nate hunched over the sink, still in mid-vomit. He offers Nate a job that's "better suited to [his] particular talents."
Cut to Nate outside, trimming the hedges. Okay, that gets half a "heh." Gilardi approaches and imparts the news that Kroehner has just purchased the abandoned house across the street, and that they plan to put Fisher & Sons out of business in six months. Back inside, David is appalled to learn that Kroehner is putting in a "Poseidon Society." As was I, because who the hell wants Ernest Borgnine and Shelley Winters climbing around the neighborhood all upside-down and stuff? David explains that Poseidon Societies are low-cost crematoriums where "for a fraction of what [they] charge, you can dump off of the relative you never really liked anyway at the Torch-Mart across the street." Heh -- but why would a crematorium be named after the God of water? Just asking. David lists off a whole string of suppliers and vendors that are backing out on their deals with Fisher & Sons, and then adds that, "by some unknown reason by the name of Kroehner," they're up for a health department investigation. Just when things can't possibly get any worse, Federico appears to ask Nate if he by any chance might happen to have Dumb's foot lying around.
Down in the basement, the boys search in vain for the missing foot. David isn't happy, which Nate finds "very interesting, because [he's] ecstatic." Federico points out that both feet were listed on the morgue manifest, and then Mom wanders in and wonders what they're looking for. She suggests looking under the bed, which Nate feels isn't a likely location in this particular instance. "That's what people always say," answers Mom, "and then they find what they're looking for under the bed." If they do find the foot under the bed, I'm going to be really annoyed. Mom opens the washing machine and exclaims, "Oh my god!" which of course makes the boys think they've found the foot. Instead, it turns out to be a Kleenex left in the wash, which has gotten all over everything. That's happened to me way more times than I can count, so I'm not going to say anything. In fact, just today, while I was writing this recap, I left a blue sock in with a half-dozen white T-shirts and now everything looks tie-dyed. I miss my mommy. I don't miss Nate and David's, however, even after she goes back upstairs. Nate then tries to retrace his steps and remember where he might have lost the foot, but he can't come up with anything. David sighs, "I'd say it's an eight-million-dollar lawsuit," and Federico thinks that might even be too low.
Old McFisher's bought the farm, E-I-E-I-O