Episode Report Card Potes: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Enter the Haggis
By Potes | Season 18 | Episode 2 | Aired on 03.07.2012
Elsewhere, Azmarie shampoos the now very blonde Laura, and the two flirt it up. If we don't get at least some shadowy fumbling and heavy breathing out of those two, everything I've ever believed about this show will be proven false. Annaliese is getting a crazy teased weave -- even crazier than she currently has. Catherine is going magenta, which will be of great help in doing the Time Warp. There's a Cover Girl plug in the midst of all this, in which we learn the tip that you should try to match your foundation to your chest. Don't actually put it ON your chest, though, unless you like having orange clothes. Alisha is getting shaved on one side of her head and a weave on the other, and the result is actually pretty cool. Ashley goes a bit lighter, Kyle goes quite a bit lighter and keeps her length, and Candace gets a long straight weave. Mariah gets bangs but still has length, much to her delight. The real revelation in this shakeover is that it makes Mariah look almost exactly like young Britney Spears. It's uncanny, and also not exactly a positive. Sophie says, "Maybe they gave her heavy bangs to hide her face a little bit." She's a cold-hearted snake, that one. I like it.
Meanwhile, Laura gets her red and blue clip-ins and overall looks pretty insane. That's mostly due to the very blonde base, though. It looks like if a strong wind blew through, her hair would just break off at the roots. Sophie really likes her cotton candy pink bob, which I quite enjoy as well. Her eyebrows are totally dyed out, too, so she looks like a really cute pretty girl alien. Oh, and then poor Eboni gets burned on the cheek with a curling iron! If that happened in real life, I think you could sue the salon for a hearty sum. Alisha explains that Eboni thinks she's going to get sent home for her burn before telling us, "I wish it was that easy to get bitches out of here." Truth. Poor Eboni, however, doesn't feel pretty at this point, and even asks the camera person not to film her. I don't think she's long for these parts.
Meanwhile, Jay explains to a still sullen Louise that they're going to darken her hair to the previously mentioned beige color. Louise apparently had dark hair on her season of BNTM, and says that she spent a year trying to go blonde and refuses to go darker. Jay says that they're trying to help her, but Louise isn't buying. She thinks she's been a very good sport about the haircut (HA!), especially since she wanted a weave. Jay tells Louise that the haircut has made her a knockout, but she tells us in no uncertain terms that she's not going darker. We cut to commercials as the battle of wills simmers like so much sizzling perm solution.