Episode Report Card Demian: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Death Takes A Tango Lesson
By Demian | Season 3 | Episode 16 | Aired on 03.14.2001
Reese's office. Ruth enters, and starts at the sight of FetusHead sitting in the shadows at Reese's desk. Moe glides down from the ceiling behind her as she quizzes FetusHead on his presence. FetusHead inquires after Reese. Ruth turns and starts again when she sees Moe smiling mildly at her. Ruth tells them she doesn't know if her partner will be back that night. FetusHead leans forward into the light from the desk lamp, asking, "Are you sure about that?" Ruth fiddles nervously with her purse strap as we cut to a shot of Prue entering the hall outside the office. Prue hears Ruth's muffled scream, and heads to the door. Inside, Moe's completed the brain sucking and notes that Ruth really didn't know anything. FetusHead supposes this means Reese has a couple of secrets as Prue TKs the door open. FetusHead and Moe glance at each other, then fade into black and white and dematerialize in a wipe from their feet up. The ghostly greyish-black smear appears in a corner of the office. Prue tosses an ineffective round of TK at it. It gradually assumes the shape of a craggy, dirty blond in black clothing, who introduces himself as Death. Death desperately needs a haircut and a facial scrub. He also appeared once on Zoe, Duncan, Jack, and Jane, so we know he has some experience with lifeless things. Death tells Prue he's "beyond [her] powers," and stretches his hand towards the almost-corpse of Ruth on the floor. Ruth's glowing spirit, or soul, or life essence, or what-the-hell-ever rises from the floor and takes his hand. Death promises Prue he'll be back. Ruth's spirit merges with Death, who then smears on out of the office. Prue looks either puzzled, dismayed, or vacant, and we cut to commercial.
Manor parlor. Phoebe sits on the couch, paging through the BoS as Cole perches a little way away from her on the arm of the sofa. Phoebe stumbles across the entry for the Suckers, which is accompanied by a watercolor of the demons in question. The watercolor makes me think the prop department creates these pages long before the tertiary characters are cast, because the two guys in the painting look nothing like FetusHead and Moe. The BoS explains that Suckers are "distant cousins of vampires [who] gather information by feeding on their victims' brain stem cells." Which we already knew. Thanks for nothing, Book of Shadows. And shut up while you're at it. Oh, God. I'm talking to a goddamned book. Gah. Anyway, the BoS also helpfully includes a vanquishing spell, which Phoebe offers to show Cole. He leaps to his feet and backs away, reminding Phoebe that the "last time [he] touched the book, it electrocuted [him]." Phoebe reminds him that his "intentions were evil" at the time, and tells him that perhaps the BoS knows he's now good. Cole isn't taking any chances. Prue storms through the front door at that moment, demanding a little quality time with the BoS. She's slightly annoyed to find Cole in the parlor, but drops it after a brief snark. Prue fills the other two in on Ruth's untimely demise, and confirms that the Suckers were responsible. She correctly guesses the Suckers' ultimate target is Cole, and glares in his general direction. He rises, suggesting that he deal with the problem on his own. Phoebe shoots this idea down, reminding Cole that he can't vanquish the Suckers without some Halliwell help. Prue reminds both of them that they have the smear to deal with as well, and rises to call for the Dolt. The Dolt orbs in with Piper and a fugly little lamp that looks like the Gandarium crystals that shot out of Mel Glibson's chest on Roswell a couple of weeks ago. The Dolt tells them the lamp is "a wedding present." "Bright, isn't it?" Piper perks through clenched teeth. Snerk. Glaah. First, I'm talking to the goddamned BoS, and now I'm more than mildly amused at Piper's bitchery. This show must be stopped before it succeeds in melting my brain completely.