Episode Report Card Wing Chun: D | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Mars Attacks
By Wing Chun | Season 7 | Episode 3 | Aired on 10.25.2000
Weaver busts in on Luka and not-Danny (formerly Danny, formerly maybe-Danny) in time to catch Lisa sewing in not-Danny's chest tube. Weaver very quietly and calmly bitches out Lisa; when she looks to Luka for backup, he merely says, "She knows how," instead of "I ordered her to do it," which is kind of shitty of him. But I just can't stay mad at that face of his. Plus, if I did, he'd smother me with his mind like Darth Vader. Weaver exposits that Lisa is no longer covered on such procedures under the hospital's malpractice insurance. Luka wearily says, "We were short-handed. The patient could have died if she hadn't put it in!" Weaver figures out that Luka "let her put it in" (and, let me just say, I'm guessing he doesn't generally meet with a lot of opposition when he suggests that any "she" "put it in," if you know what I'm saying, and I think you do), which is not quite how the whole thing went down (and, again, speaking of going down...but enough about me), but whatever. Weaver snaps that it's Luka's responsibility if anything goes wrong, and that he should have called Weaver. Luka offers his last gasps: "She did a great job....You were busy." Weaver angrily snaps on a pair of gloves and tells Lisa to step back. Lisa is a bit slow on the uptake and murmurs that she's almost finished, so that Weaver practically has to place her body between Lisa and the patient in order to take over. Lisa stumbles out in frustration, on an errand for pavulon for Elizabeth.
In the supply closet, she runs into Carter, who asks her whether they have any extra-small scrubs for L'il Doogie, and Lisa whines, "Don't ask me; I didn't even know I was working here 'til today." This proves to be the peroration to her full-throated declamation on the theme "Poor Me," like, fine AA sponsor you are, Princess Graceless of Moan-aco. The précis: Lisa doesn't like the ER but she's afraid that if she says as much to her nurse manager, Weaver will have a grudge against her in the event that she returns to the ER as a med student. Carter is evidently confident that she'll come back (since she has a contract -- er, I mean, "this place grows on you"), but Lisa opines that the ER is "a freak show" and makes a fungus joke that is more played than the 2000 World Series. She hands him a pair of little scrubs and makes with the pavulon.
Carter tells L'il Doogie that his self-diagnosis was correct, and gives him the l'il scrubs. He prescribes bactrim and says he'll help L'il Doogie with the scrubs in a minute. L'il Doogie asks whether Carter can hook a brother up with some extra catheters, and Carter says he can. L'il Doogie gives Carter a paper airplane modeled after a "F22 Raptor." Carter somehow intuits that L'il Doogie "like[s] jets," and asks whether it'll fly. L'il Doogie makes an "of course" noise, and launches it down the hall, where it hits Weaver in the back of the head. She whips around and snaps, "Grow up, Malucci." Heh. You know what would've been funnier? If she yelled at him, and then he fell down.