Episode Report Card Strega: B+ | 173 USERS: C+ YOU GRADE IT Escape From Wedded Bliss
By Strega | Season 2 | Episode 11 | Aired on 2000.07.22
Crichton mutters, "Bye," and sits down on a bench as he examines his horrible jacket. "Welcome to Barbie World," he sighs, and I go back and delete the "Bridal Wear by Mattel" line I wrote earlier because I'd forgotten he makes that joke. Damn it. A flunky enters and announces that they're almost ready. Crichton has his back to the flunky, so he doesn't notice immediately when the flunky steps behind a guard and, well, turns the guard's head slightly. Which apparently snaps his neck. My neck-snap standards are a little high from all those years of Angel, I guess. The sound of the guard hitting the floor causes Crichton to turn around in time to see the flunky leveling a weapon at him. Crichton says, "Huuah!" and tilts the bench up to knock the gun from the flunky's hand. Fight! He conks the flunky on the noggin with the bench's leg, then drops the bench down so that it's pinning the flunky down. And then he plays "whale on the flunky." Oh, it's a Russell Crowe imitation! It's going pretty well until two more flunkies swoop in, drag Crichton back, and toss him to a fourth flunky who's just strolled in. You know, I just read an issue of Casanova that explains where bad guys get all their flunkies. And if you like this show, you might enjoy it, because it's just as insane. After tossing Crichton around for a minute, the first flunky says, "Here's your wedding present from Prince Clavor," and raises his weapon again. He fires, and a thread of FX kerzaps Crichton in the neck. Crichton's face turns into silly putty as he screams, and then we freeze on smoosh-faced, Barbie-suited Crichton. What a way to go.
To be continued...