Episode Report Card Sars: D+ | 2 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Boyfriend
By Sars | Season 1 | Episode 8 | Aired on 03.09.1998
The soundtrack cranks a riff clearly meant to remind us of George Thorogood’s "Bad To The Bone," and Jen struts down the hall to greet her ex; Joey shrugs and goes into class. Jen demands, "Billy, what the hell are you doing here?" and Billy asks, "Is that any way to greet the love of your life?" and Jen apologizes and asks him to leave all in one breath. Billy tries to kiss her. Jen pulls away. Billy informs her that he "drove all night just to see" her, and since it only takes five hours to drive from Manhattan to Cape Cod, Billy must have gone by way of western Pennsylvania, which Jen busts him on, and Billy smiles, "I got lost?" Dawson, non-cleverly non-concealed behind a wall, peeks around the corner at this little tableau as Jen snaps, "Do you have any idea what my mother would do if she found out you were here?" She tells him that her parents sent her to Capeside to get her away from him blah blah blah "things have changed" blah blah blah she has changed blah blah blah fishcakes. Billy invites her to go on a ride with him to fill him in "on all the advances," and Jen gives him a half-annoyed, half-sultry look. Dawson stares at them from beneath a pouf of bangs that defies even my formidable descriptive powers; Billy holds the side door open, and Jen assents and walks through the door in her too-high-heeled boots. Dawson stares some more. Cliff "The Once And Future Noel" Elliott comes up behind him and asks if Dawson has seen Jen or knows "where she is this period," and Dawson lies and says no, and Cliff asks Dawson to give Jen the message that he wants her to come to his barbecue, and "what the hell -- why don’t you come too?" Dawson’s nostrils undulate, and he says with false cheer, "Cool, sounds great." Cliff asks Dawson if Jen has a boyfriend, and Dawson answers smugly, "Uh, yeah, she does. Me." Cliff, flabbergasted: "Really!" Dawson, even more smugly: "Yeah." Cliff congratulates Dawson and walks off down the hall. Whatever.
The Faithless Hussy suggests leisure activities, which The Flash shoots down as too expensive, but adds passive-aggressively that she, in her capacity as "family breadwinner," should decide, not he. FH points out that Dr. Keenan wants them to experience new things that neither of them has done before; The Flash in turn points out that they’ve never "experienced" swinging or spouse-swapping either, and asks if those wouldn’t "be more appealing to your recreational tastes." FH purses her lips and whispers, "When are you gonna stop punishing me?" The Flash tersely responds, "When I can get the vision of my naked wife playing ‘hide the -- ’" and stops as FH stares at him, then finishes, "When it stops hurting," and picks up his newspaper.