Episode Report Card Couch Baron: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT NOOOOO!
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 18 | Aired on 09.16.1999
Crichton and Chiana enter an access shaft. Lingering shot on Chiana, rattler sound, OH MY GOD SHE'S POSSESSED WE GET IT. Although I think it would be funny if Crichton realized Chiana was possessed because the virus made her act more demure than usual. Like, "Wait, you're wearing underwear? VIRUS ALERT!"
Aeryn and Larraq. Aeryn asks the valid question of why they didn't kill the virus, and Larraq tells her that wasn't the mission. Aeryn asks why they would do such a thing, as if the whole concept of the Gammak base doesn't scream "biological warfare" louder than that rubber chicken's death cry. Wake up, sister. Aeryn wonders at the price, as Larraq has to this point lost four members of his crew, and again, her whole "Peacekeepers behave how, now?" attitude seems totally ridiculous. Suffocate rubber chickens if you must, but don't suffocate us with the exposition, please.
D'Argo and Thorrn enter an access shaft.
Crichton tells Chiana that the arn is almost up, like, no kidding. Just then, Aeryn reports that they've found Rygel. He's hiding in some small vent or something, and Larraq trains the stun gun on him. Aeryn tells Larraq that Rygel is trapped, but he doesn't seem to have a clear shot at him. Oh my God, here are Chiana and Crichton, and WHY DIDN'T SHE SLIP AWAY? I mean, I know with sci-fi, complaining about errors of logic is like returning Swiss cheese to the supermarket and complaining about the holes. But still. I mean, here's a thought: she goes to see Pilot, jumps to him, and uses his control over Moya to cut off life support, killing everyone on board. Then they head for the nearest heavily populated planet. Sound good? Is that "intellant" enough? Anyway, Rygel yells that he wasn't the only one there, and meanwhile, Chiana, thinking no one's watching her, behaves in a very intellant-virus-like way, causing Crichton to look at her funny. Larraq of course stuns Rygel right before he can say who else was there, and then we see Zhaan look behind her and see Crichton and Chiana acting weirdly, because the virus has chosen the moment it could lay the spores to jump to Crichton's body. The only bright side I can see is that it's got to be better at the British accent than Crichton is.
In a pedeconference, Zhaan says they must find a way to destroy the virus without killing Rygel, and D'Argo snits that it would be easier to do in her apothecary than in a locked cell. The virus tells them no by way of ad-libbing a Ghostbusters reference, and says he'll try to get the information they need out of Hassan. A reluctant D'Argo and Zhaan return to their cells, and D'Argo is locked in without incident, but before Crichton gets to do the same to Zhaan, Thorrn appears, so Crichton back-punches Zhaan in the face to make it look good, only he goes full force with it. Ouch. Zhaan, hurt in more ways than one, holds a hand to her nose as Crichton swaggers off.