Episode Report Card Couch Baron: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT NOOOOO!
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 18 | Aired on 09.16.1999
Thorrn approaches.
Chiana asks Rygel if he recognizes the species. Rygel: "Even if I did, I wouldn't admit it." Hee. He just has no idea that he's not exactly the fairest of them all either, and God love him for it. Chiana says that whatever it is, it's still alive, but they don't get much farther than that before they hear Thorrn at the door...
... who enters after Chiana and Rygel have hidden, and draws his gun upon seeing the crate open. He kneels down by it, which doesn't seem like a great idea, but I could buy that he doesn't know the full details of the cargo they're carrying. Something seems to incapacitate him as he touches the creature, but he's recovered by the time the other male Peacekeeper flunky enters. He tries to call Larraq, but doesn't get far before Thorrn shoots him dead. Also, Larraq didn't have his earpiece on to hear the warning that Thorrn was about to shoot him, so it's nice that that loyalty to the death he was bragging about earlier went to such good use. Pilot reports the weapons fire to the "prisoners," and D'Argo, Qualta blade in hands, orders Pilot to open the cell door.
Back in the cargo bay, Thorrn, with a maniacal look, chokes the battery chicken to death. As if those things didn't have it rough enough already.
Aeryn and the two other Peacekeepers head for the cargo bay.
Rygel panics and runs off. Chiana hisses at him, presumably because she's too big to follow him, but Thorrn hears her, and soon he's got her out in the open. He raises his gun, but then -- presumably realizing that if he were to kill her, he'd be the likely suspect -- he changes tacks and lays one on her. And of course, if anyone was going to get this disease through a sexual act, it's Chiana. Anyway, Thorrn gets all stupid again, while Chiana's eyes glow green. She head-butts Thorrn into unconsciousness.
Outside, the rescue party has reached the door. Inside, Chiana's about to snap Thorrn's neck, but she hears the team coming. Aeryn enters and quickly sees the dead chicken, and asks what's going on. Larraq tensely tells her, "It's escaped." From behind them, Crichton asks, "What has escaped?" My hopes that you'd abandon that travesty of an accent before the end of Act Two. Also, the thing that's currently inside green-eyed Chiana, who's watching from the shadows.
After the break, Aeryn finds Thorrn unconscious, but Larraq warns her not to touch him. As Thorrn gets to his feet, Larraq explains that the fugitive they're after is an "intellant" virus, and was using the rubber chicken as a host when they isolated it. Exposition continues, letting us know that when Larraq and Co. caught the virus, it could only infect one host at a time, but once it gets a chance, it'll lay its spores. Thanks, Larraq. Not only are we getting one of those explanations that's really an "explanation," but you gave Crichton the impetus to "repeat," "Spohhhhwwwwzzzz." Like I said, "thanks." We wrap up with the information that if the virus is in the same host for an arn or more, it can lay a couple million spores, and then, according to Aeryn, "this whole end of the galaxy is in some serious frelling dren." The good news is that the virus isn't airborne -- it can only jump hosts through physical proximity. Thorrn doesn't remember anything about what happened, and then Chiana chooses this moment to pop out of her hiding place. Even if, as seems likely, she had no exit other than into the room, I'm not sure why she didn't bide her time and try to wait out the arn. She could always pretend to be unconscious if they happened to find her, which doesn't seem all that likely to have happened. Anyway, Chiana spins a yarn pointing the finger at Rygel, and the Peacekeepers disperse to try to find him. Crichton, after far too much re-exposition of what we just heard, thinks perhaps it's time to end their charade, but Aeryn warns him that the Peacekeepers will shoot at anything they don't trust, and basically bites out that the whole situation is a fiasco. "It is a grave misfortune that uniform did not fit me." I take that to mean she would have sided with Zhaan and D'Argo on the issue of jumping the Peacekeepers while they had the chance. Or maybe she simply gets nastier under pressure, but I've never heard of anything like that happening. Aeryn leaves, and Crichton tells Chiana to stick with him, as she'll be safer that way. Chiana smiles to herself, and we hear a snake's rattle on the soundtrack for the legions of us that were thinking the virus was suddenly going to turn over a new leaf.