Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 56 USERS: A YOU GRADE IT Don't Talk Too Loud
By Jacob Clifton | Season 5 | Episode 14 | Aired on 03.16.2014
Kalinda: "Thinks are different, um, when the lawyers are gone. What's up?"
Elsbeth: "Will, gimme the phone! Kalinda! Kalinda, I miss you!"
Kalinda: "I... You know what, I miss you too, sweetheart."
Elsbeth: "Dig me up some shit on Nelson Dubeck."
Kalinda: "No problem."
Elsbeth, loudly: "I am not a dirty stinking Jew!"
Kalinda: "Okay girl bye."
It's great because now she actually can. Will obviously couldn't be like, "Investigate this guy, but don't ask me why and don't tell anybody and don't tell Diane, and let's just hope you don't get deposed or indicted," but because it's Elsbeth doing this now, as his lawyer, they can loop around it back to her. I didn't think about that at the time but now I think it's really elegant. Both of these Chicago lawyers calling all the way back home.
SOMEONE TO WATCH OVER ME
Luckily, it's a piano bar! With a fully and terrifyingly appropriate song as Alicia is finally reunited with her friend wine, whom she thinks is going to help her do this instead of the truth -- take it from me -- that it's only going to make it more intense and more likely that she's going to bleed all over the pages and end up looking more naked up there than if she'd just stuck to her fruit basket and followed Mommy Cary's instructions.
The second day, the humiliating day in the white suit when she literally didn't have a clue what she was supposed to do, and she was trying to delay the lease on the apartment she couldn't afford in the first place, Jackie Florrick melted out of the shadows like some kind of goddamn Wendy Scott-Carr, and it was terrifying.
Jackie: "You can always live with me, my precioussss."
Alicia: "Oh, thank you so much, but um, this is in a really good school district."
Jackie: "School districts won't matter when I'm feasting on your liver, precious."
Is it real? This one, sure, but later on when Jackie shows back up again it's clearly a mental construct, which leads down a good rabbit hole: This idea that, when it comes to Peter, there has never been a time when the ghoulish presence of Jackie Florrick wasn't hanging over them, loving them in her particular harrowing way. Loving Peter better than Alicia can; being a certain kind of woman better than Alicia ever could.
And not just that, but even as the walls were closing in and she was feeling dark thoughts and breaking down in elevators and screaming "What the fuck am I going to do?" there was a better, stronger, brighter part in her that was screaming in relief. Finally her life could start, finally she was being forced into a new shape. Finally things had gotten so bad that she had no options but to change, and that means rising: Secret Future Alicia was already calling her home.
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