Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: C | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Elle In A Handbasket
By Jacob Clifton | Season 3 | Episode 11 | Aired on 01.08.2009
Marc and Betty locate the Halston dress in Elle's closet, where he knew it would be ("I'm not doing this for you, I'm doing this to get a better Christmas present from Wilhelmina") and then points out the Ugly Wall, where they put up pictures of ugly coworkers to make fun of them. Marc's idea, naturally. He tells her to hurry up and plays with a giant furry hat while she works on the dress's vintage snaps, but then they hear somebody coming and freeze. They hug in fear and a drunk couple of drunks come in giggling, but where are they?
Weekend At Bernie's-ing the mannequin down the hall and through the party with the big furry hat over its face so it just seems like a drunk model. That works. Then the mannequin's head falls off and Nikki spots them, wearing quite the party outfit: tailored skirt, too-tight wrist bangle making her arm look like a sausage, and a shapeless wide-neck top with three-quarter sleeves that make her look grossly out of proportion like a Tyrannosaurus Rex, and cinched with a belt right around where her waist would be if she had one but instead just seems to be holding her head-sized boobs up and dividing her body into two equal-sized blobs with her stupid pink hair on top like a stripper-haired snowman. Looks like somebody got all diva on wardrobe, because there is no other justification for putting her body through this insanity. She is just not as fat as her clothes are telling you she is. Then they fight and it's dumb and I don't recap fisticuffs because I am opposed to both violence and stupid shit, and they get away just as Nikki's bearing down on them with giant white flowers clutched in her honey-baked fists.
Daniel explains to Wili that he knew what she was up to, and has finally figured out her crush on Connor. He says he won't hold the fact that she's human against her (which isn't the punchline but is sort of funnier than the punchline, like, "You're in love with Connor too? You're only human!") and that he'll keep her humanity a secret. They grin at each other in that super-affectionate thrilling way they've started doing this year, love that, and then Betty and Marc show up with the dress and headless mannequin. Wili admits she's intrigued and then invites all three of them in. "Pinch me!" Marc breathes. "Don't touch me!" Marc hisses.
Daniel gives them champagne and Marc quietly giggles about how he's the first assistant to make it into one of Wili's parties -- explaining, of course, that he'll leave her out of the story when he tells it -- and they share a super-sweet moment of pride and excitement about how their lives are finally happening. Marc sets off toward Zac and Betty spots Jodie, who is really looking quite well for a lady of a thousand and six, and ignores Hilda's phone call. Which would be totally acceptable, but is doubly acceptable because Jodie is heading straight for Betty. Betty puts her phone on silent and they discuss how Betty's gotten her contacts together, and then Jodie acts all weird and tells Betty the shrimp are spicy and then wanders the fuck away in the middle of talking to Betty. As I'm sure people often do.