Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: C | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Elle In A Handbasket
By Jacob Clifton | Season 3 | Episode 11 | Aired on 01.08.2009
Anyway. Hilda calls this part her "very own Broadway opening," and Ignacio... Okay, this is what I'm talking about. He says it's going to be like "Spring Awakening, Avenue Q, and South Pacific all rolled into one." And I'm not saying I wouldn't like to see that production, but even with my hatred and ignorance of Broadway musicals I know that makes zero fucking sense, because really what he just said is, "It'll be like [three Broadway musicals you may have heard of, picked out of a hat at random], all rolled into one." Which, I don't know if you know this, but gay people watch this show, and many of them actually know about Broadway musicals, and many of them are occasionally able to discern when you're pandering. Especially when you do it in a way that suggests you've been hit in the head by a cast-iron frying pan that once belonged to John Wells.
We have got to get out of this scene, I agree. I'm just having trouble doing that, because the whole episode is like this, just like: soft joke from The Cosby Show school of "humor" leading into a non sequitur fashion reference from 1996 and then some kind of over the top slapsticky Christina shit, and then repeat. And it pisses me off because this season has been more like that than not, and we're halfway through the season at this point. At least boring old Season Two didn't feel like it was written by two old queens wearing elastic-waisted Mom Jeans in a trailer park somewhere upstate. This season -- with several wonderful exceptions but not nearly enough -- has felt like somebody's idea of what this show is like, rather than being the actual show. Which is sad, because I liked it once.
Anyway, to Manhattan, where Daniel is complaining about Elle's sales win for last issue -- perhaps, he says, it was the classy photo of Sarah Silverman on the toilet, because being outraged by Sarah Silverman is soooo 2009, and meanwhile here's what everybody's wearing: Betty looks presentable-ish in a skirt of many colors in the red family, Marc looks stunning in a black suit, patterned grey shirt and neon pink tie, and Amanda looks sort of understated in some Express Editor-looking pants, a stupid plaidlike vest, and a gold-dipped Bluetooth. Marc and Mandy remind us about how Marc was once an intern at Elle, and Betty shushes them. Wili tells the assembled staffers that if Elle wins again, one of them will die; Daniel offers them a bottle of great wine if they get any scoop on Elle's plans for next month.