Episode Report Card Kim: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Your Money Or Your Wife
By Kim | Season 4 | Episode 3 | Aired on 10.23.2001
Felicity gets a check from the Financial Aid office for $75, but her tuition is $8000. The amazingly understanding clerk explains that there's only so much money to go around for aid, and Felicity applied late, so she got the short end of the stick. Felicity says, "Not that you care, but I got into a big fight with my dad and I told him I would do this on my own. I'm just trying to go to school." You're right, Felicity. He doesn't care, nor should he. There are people with much bigger problems than you, and some of them are probably standing right there in the Financial Aid office. The clerk says he has something that might help, and hands Felicity a book. Felicity reads the cover, "Guide to Scholarships." She thanks the clerk and makes to leave, but the clerk informs her that the book costs $35. Felicity, it's called a library. Look into it. They have lots and lots of books that you can use, for free. ["And if you show a little initiative, and have good grades, you can cobble together enough scholarship money to finance your schooling. I had a prof who cobbled together her grad-school funding from dozens of little scholarships for which students hadn't applied for years because they weren't, like, Fulbright scholarships. It's more work, but it is possible! This education-funding PSA brought to you by Wing Chun, University Registrar's Daughter." -- Wing Chun]
At Dean & Deluca, Javier looks through the scholarship book, and points out one he likes to Felicity. It's something called "Sunrise Surprise Beauty Pageant," and the prize is $10,000. Felicity doesn't want to be in a pageant, but Javier feels that Felicity and her "silky smooth skin are shoo-ons [sic]." Felicity points out something that she is more interested in -- the Liz Weinstein Scholarship for Women in Art, which she feels could solve all her problems. Javier wryly adds, "Not all your problems." Felicity shoots him a look and clarifies, "My academic problems." Javier says that Felicity can try to get the scholarship, and he's going to try out for Don Quixote, "and [they'll] both be like pigs in a blanket." Javier confesses that he came to the United States to be an actor. He went on one audition, for Grease, and got three notes into his song before the casting person called, "Next!" Javier hasn't gone on an audition since. Felicity assures Javier that he'll do great. Javier thinks that Felicity will, too, and "if Liz Weinstein is not available, [he] thinks [he's] looking at a beauty queen!" Felicity cracks up, and who wouldn't, really?