Episode Report Card Miss Alli: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Sponge Bath, Flare Pants
By Miss Alli | Season 7 | Episode 12 | Aired on 12.03.2003
Commercials. Yo, Jami Gertz, how you gonna play me like that?
Day comes to the yellow filters over the cameras at the spa getaway. I am tempted to make a South Pacific joke at the expense of the cinematography, but believe it or not, I used it already. Someone delivers coffee to the hotel room, and then Jon, Lill, and Darrah go outside and find a big breakfast waiting for them. Jon and Darrah manage to find a few minutes over breakfast for a little chat. He tells her that he doesn't want to face Lill in the finals. He wants to face Darrah instead. He voices over that he was able to "feed off Darrah's greed." Again with the greed. It's not greed. It's game play, you maroon. Anyway, Jon makes a deal with Darrah for the final two. In a quick interview after this conversation, she makes the strange claim that although Jon is a snake and lies, "he also tells the truth, too," and she thinks he's telling the truth about this particular thing. We see Jon perfecting his ugly-ass hair. It takes time, you know. Otherwise, it might wind up just ugly or just ass, and you can't have that.
The boat returns to camp, and Sandra pumps Team Spa for details of their adventure. She voices over that when they got back, she was glad the reward was over. Jon proceeds to hold court, lording it over Sandra and Christa how much stuff they got. Lill voices over that she would rather have downplayed it somewhat, but that Jon just wasn't up for that. In an interview, she tries to act cutesy about how it wasn't her fault, because she wasn't the one talking about it. Whatever, Granny-Panties. Jon describes dinner in agonizing detail. "We ate for four hours," he says. "Jon, please tell me you're at least hung over," Burton says as he emerges from the sea. Heh. They should all really stop rubbing it in, but I had a preposterously expensive and magnificent margarita last Thursday night that I similarly could not stop talking about, so I understand. Lill chuckles with Darrah that Christa and Sandra don't seem to know much trouble they're in, and that they're taking it well.
Burton and Jon take a walk on the beach. "Everything's set," Jon assures Burton. He explains that he told Darrah that the only people they could beat were each other. Burton interviews that it sounds to him like Jon did "a great job" at manipulating Lill and Darrah, promising them both the final three. He and Jon then discuss who should go next, and Jon says it should be Christa. Burton balks, but Jon reminds him that they can't afford to be nice to anyone. Burton seems to be feeling bad in reminiscence of his own booting, but he says in an interview that this is their strategy -- Jon's the bad cop, Burton's the good cop. He's hoping that, in the end, the votes will go to the good cop. I hope no one on the jury has ever seen Law & Order, or they might figure out that tricky strategy.