Episode Report Card Jessica: C | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Spiderwebs
By Jessica | Season 6 | Episode 8 | Aired on 11.12.2002
Jen and Audrey are at a record store -- do people still call them that? Whatever. They're browsing through the CDs, which provides the opportunity for a long, loving, full-screen shot of the cover of the latest No Doubt album. Jen is haranguing Audrey to come with them to the concert; Audrey pouts. Jen points out that if No Doubt can "overcome their romantic entanglements," then Audrey can get along with Pacey and Joey for one night. After more irritating and unrealistic dialogue about Gwen Stefani and the band, which I refuse to recap, Audrey relents. I feel so bad for Gina Fattore. The Product Placement Episode Of The Season fell on her watch, and I'm quite sure that the network forced her to work all this No Doubt crap into the dialogue. She did the best she could, really, but this episode is in many ways a glorified commercial for an album that was produced by the same multimedia empire that produces this show. And while I understand the concept of synergy, there's a fine line between artful product placement and an infomercial, and this episode falls uncomfortably close to the latter. I don't really have a beef with the concept of using television to sell music, as Dawson's does regularly by advertising the music used in the episode over the end credits; I actually think that's sort of clever, marketing-wise, and at least it's not blatantly intrusive as far as the storyline goes.
But this is absurd. It's absurd and it's insulting. Not to mention the fact that it does the story itself no favors. I mean, do you ever see crap like this on other, more critically and artistically acclaimed shows? No. I've yet to see Sydney Bristow turn to Vaughn and go, "After a long day of spying, nothing makes me feel better about the fact that my mother killed your father than coming home and popping in the new Disney DVD of Beauty and the Beast, which I happen to have here, stuck in the pocket of my neoprene dress. Look at the cover of it, so as to better identify it when you see it at a store near you, Vaughn." Or on, say, 24, it's not like Jack Bauer is all turning to the President and saying, "It's unfortunate that terrorists might blow us all to bits. But if we have to die today, I'd like to go with some hot, fresh Taco Bell in my gullet. And thank God, this week their Fiesta Gorditas are only 99 cents! You're so distracted by your presidential duties that I'm not sure you heard me: Fiesta Gorditas are only 99 cents, this week only, at Taco Bell. Come on, sir, let's make a run for the border." ["But it's only not like that because they've already given the Ford vehicles in the episode a series of lingering, lechy close-ups. Sigh." -- Sars] The glorified infomercial episode is a sure sign of declining quality on a show, and this is the worst one I've ever seen, mostly because the product placement is so constant and the musical scenes are so long, but also because the band appearance has literally no effect on the plot. I mean, at least when Donna, Kelly and Brenda were stalking Color Me Badd, there weren't twenty minutes of "I Adore Me Amore." Anyway. The more I think about it, the more irritated I get, so I'm just going to stop thinking about it. The above rant was sponsored by crack cocaine. Crack cocaine: What you're smoking when you think the audience is too stupid to notice that you're shoving a product down their throats with the subtlety of a jackhammer in a library.