Episode Report Card Keckler: A+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Best. Episode. Ever.
By Keckler | Season 4 | Episode 18 | Aired on 04.21.2005
Enterprise is in big trouble. They have a reactor breach. Forrest orders all to abandon ship and get their evil asses to the escape pods. He hangs back to buy them more time and orders She-Ho away. Man, I hope she remembers to bring Evil Porthos along.
Defiant. T'Pevil reports the damage to Enterprise. Evil Leaper wants Defiant's weapons and engines brought online. The Bridge detail is incredible. I'm just so happy right now. But no, I'm sad! This show is over! Why did they have to make it suck for so long and then give us this?! I'm really mad!
The Enterprise burns and shoots escape pods out. I guess the pod is cast. Heh. They look like flying doorstops. Niiice. Some escape pods bust up on the web and others are taken out by the Tholian ships. Forrest still stays on the Bridge. If he's waiting for the band to play "Ne'er My Evil God to Thee," it just ain't going to happen.
Defiant. Helmet off, Evil Leaper looks up at the viewscreen just in time to see Enterprise explode in the Tholian web. It's probably the best effect that viewscreen has ever seen. Seriously, they're going to examine Defiant's technology and be all, "What is this shit -- food cubes? Data on blocks of wood? Chicken wire in the rooms? Why, oh why did we abandon Enterprise?! Oh, wait, the sparkly pillows are actually kind of cool." Everyone looks a bit shocked. Well, not Reedvil, who looks creepily jazzed by the big explosion. Evil Leaper stiffs in a deep breath and furrows us into the "To Be Continued." The podcast says that the end credits, which UPN ALWAYS interrupts with split-screen promos, were also evil. We TiVo'd the rerun and got to hear this week's opening theme over the end credits. It's still awesome even without the images of death and destruction.
Next week: TOS-wear and, as I told Sars, Bakula's too ripped to need the girdle but it'd be awesome if he wore it ironically.
"Awesome" count: 8.