By Lauren S
The results from the debate are in and...both candidates did well. Santos is up four points, while Vinick is up only two, so it's still a victory. Santos is making a campaign stop in Los Angeles the day to speak at an African-American church when the news comes in that a twelve-year-old African-American boy has just been shot and killed by a Latino police officer after brandishing a plastic machine gun. This sends everyone on the campaign into crisis mode as they try to figure out how to address the issue and not take sides or offend the titular undecideds. Santos gets so frustrated that his staff is bickering when he's already feeling uncomfortable about being asked to speak on behalf of every Latino, ever, and throws out his planned speech and just says what is in his heart -- which earns him the respect of the congregation and a hand-holding from his wife. Josh decides to visit Toby, who ends up being extremely hostile; they fight, and Josh storms out as Toby all but dares him to ever try to visit again. The day, Josh does, in fact, come back, and they finally discuss the campaign and Toby's opinion that Santos will not win since Josh had to convince him to run in the first place, which means he must not want it badly enough to handle the job. Josh decides the real issue is that Toby doesn't believe Josh can succeed in running the campaign, but hey, at least they're talking. And finally, C.J. comes into work for "an hour" to do Ellie a favor and meet with her about wedding details. She winds up with Kate in the middle of a very messy possible China-Russia nuclear standoff over Kazakhstan, they figure out that Ellie is pregnant, and Will proves that he's a better Press Secretary than wedding planner when he winds up making the groom nearly have an anxiety attack and the bride cry.
Previously: Bartlet fired Toby; C.J. and Kate explained that the Russians would benefit most from Issatov's death; Santos challenged Vinick to a debate; and then there was the debate itself -- I'm cringing again at just a few seconds of it: Santos is wearing "liberal" as a badge of honor. (But not selling the line very convincingly.)
Lou is looking at her...cell phone? Blackberry? Really, it looks like a Gameboy to me. She's calling results through a door to Santos: 46\% of voters have a more favorable opinion of him now, CNN/USA Today poll and Newsweek both call it a tie. It's 5:45 AM in Denver, fifty-three days before the election. As Lou speaks, a hair dryer comes on, and Lou and Edie express some disgust at Helen's unhelpfulness. Helen then hurriedly runs out of the room, much to their surprise. Edie: "He's running the hair dryer." Lou glances away from her portable poll-results holder: "Kinda wish you didn't know." Santos calls out, forcing Lou to yell the results once again, this time over the buzz of the dryer. Santos is now only seven points down. Helen tells him, "You're a rock star, sweetheart!," but runs around the room, distracted. Santos has gone up four points while Vinick has gone up only two. Helen asks how that can be, and Lou explains that now they're both pulling from undecideds, so the campaign needs to be happy with going up "more."
Edie then hands Santos a schedule, which he doesn't even glance at, calling Lou and Edie to deliver them a talking-to as Bram comes in to let everyone know that the bus is ready. Lou asks Santos if he knows what his average SMT was this week. (And what is it at all, I wonder?) Santos takes it all as a joke, accusing Bram of rounding up the number Lou's going to give him because Bram's "got money riding on it." "Ninety-two minutes," Lou interrupts him. He protests, "It's a lie!" Helen saves us all, asking what it all even means. Edie: "Santos Mean Time." It turns out he is consistently horrifically late, and Helen expresses surprise. Shouldn't she know this about her husband already? I had a boyfriend who ran late, and as much as I tried (and failed) to get us places on time, I just knew I was fighting a losing battle. I cannot believe that this is news to Helen. There's cutesy "it's not my fault" banter, and Lou is still staring at her Gameboy, finally telling Santos to look at the schedule and see if he "thinks it's something [he] can commit to." Edie has Santos initial the schedule, at which point he actually looks at it and wonders what "CS" means; he's told it stands for "change shirt." "Every two hours?" he squeaks. "It's for the sweating," Helen informs him as he walks by. "There's [sic] too many women in this room," Santos says, exasperated, as every guy has gone through when he gets surrounded by all of his girlfriends and given personal grooming/dating/lifestyle tips.
There's scheduling talk so that we know the campaign is in Denver today, and Los Angeles tomorrow, which is a reschedule from the week before. Donna walks in and asks to talk to Lou -- she seems subdued, but it may be the effect of her pale makeup; we'll have to wait and see how this goes. They're getting a bunch of calls about a twelve-year-old black boy killed by the police in L.A. the night. Santos overhears this and asks what they know, which is not much. Donna very carefully says that they should make a statement, and Edie replies that they will be at the Page Church the day. Lou adds that it will be a good time to show that they feel the pain the black community is feeling, and no one but Donna seems concerned. They need this, because apparently their numbers have not gone up among black voters. There's a lot of looking at each other among the players, and all head out the door without another thought and move on. Donna tries again to get Lou's attention. In a delightful cute-boy bonehead line, Bram says he doesn't understand why the AA community doesn't like the idea of a Latino president. Edie points out that there's friction "in the hood," to which Bram replies, "That hasn't been my experience." "Yeah, you're a Venezuelan from Princeton." Hey, don't knock the hardcore racial tensions of the Ivy League.
Donna tries again, as they walk in a very large pack down the hall, to say that Gerard in scheduling thinks they should make a change because of the L.A. sitch; Lou breezily insults Gerard, and they all get in the elevator. Donna leans in enough to stop the doors with her shoulder, and says that Lou should give Gerard a call. Looking cool as a cucumber up from his paper, Santos asks the cop's name. It turns out that Santos might be sharper than we thought, since he's the first one to clue in to Donna's underlying problem. Lou's having none of it, trying to keep them moving, but Santos asks Donna one more time, and she admits "Rafael Martinez." Santos: "Yeah. That's what I was afraid of." Lou out of the elevator, and magically calls Mario on her Gameboy to get Josh, Annabeth, and Gerard from scheduling on the phone, with a glare at Donna. Hey, don't shoot the messenger!
White House. C.J. is looking fabulous in jeans, a button-down shirt, and some sort of suede-y-looking jacket. She runs into Will, and they exchange witty pleasantries about working again on a Saturday. Will tries to tempt C.J. with a lunch of something "soggy, served in plastic." She says she's only there for some wedding plans, as a favor for Ellie, and will be gone in an hour. Oh, C.J., don't you know never to say that out loud? My guess is that you're in for a long day, on the strength of that comment alone. Ellie's overwhelmed with all of the White House wedding brouhaha. Speaking of, Will needs to talk to C.J. about the band's playlist. C.J. asks, "Too many double entendres?" Will replies, "It's the single entendres I'm worried about." Aw, that makes me sad. What time other than a wedding can you get down to Tone Loc on the dance floor while your mother is there? People bond over dirty dance music in a special way that just doesn't work when an uncomfortable song comes on the radio in the car. "World stage, shadow of our forefathers," Will continues. C.J. promises to bring it up, and stirs some tasty powdered creamer into her coffee. A TV is on with commentary on the debate, and C.J. throws up her hands over how bad it was. Whoops, my bad -- she actually throws up her hands to find Margaret in the office when C.J. specifically told her to take the day off. Margaret is holding a file large enough to carry all of my senior-year textbooks at once. "I told you not to come in today!" C.J. exclaims. "That never works out," Margaret replies matter-of-factly. She knows she's the glue, and she rocks it, going right into wedding details. The only remaining issue is the menu. Something about fish and game, yada yada, so she suggests sea bass or trout. C.J. counters with swordfish: "No one wants trout at a wedding." Margaret, however, seems inordinately attached to the river fish: "It's flavorful! And under...appreciated." Hmm, yet she hasn't practiced her argument too much. She finally ends with "no swordfish, tuna, or brie." Oh, how I love the briefish. "You know this isn't your wedding, right?" C.J. asks her dryly. "I'm asking you to take my word for it because you're a busy woman, and sometimes you don't need any more information than I give you." But C.J., to her credit, confusedly agrees to push the trout.
C.J. immediately turns on a happy face, but actually seems genuinely happy to see Ellie and meet Vic. Ellie is sorry to bring her in on a weekend. C.J. brushes that off: "Please. It's bad enough you have to coordinate with three branches of government. Anything I can do to help." There's a knock at the door; it's Margaret. C.J., as if sensing unpleasantness coming, tells Margaret they aren't at the trout yet, but Margaret is there with different fishy news. Kate needs C.J., but C.J. would like to know how she'd like to see her if she doesn't know that she's in the office. Margaret: "Imagine her delight when she learned." C.J. says she'll be back in one minute, and Margaret bends around her to chirp, "Ten minutes. Just a guess."
At Santos headquarters, we're introduced to Lester. Lester? Come on, it's D'Shawn from Beverly Hills, -- the star CU basketball player Brandon tutored (and Taught a Very Important Lesson to about cheating or some such, I believe) and for whom Donna performed the famous Texas Dip at her Houston debutante ball. D'Lester gives Josh the rundown on the kid who was killed: his name is Ronny Burke, and he brandished a plastic weapon after getting out of a stolen car. Josh is looking for any angle that might make the happenings less horrific -- for instance, observing that a plastic gun like that can look completely realistic. Unfortunately, however, there was a witness saying that Ronny was surrendering when he was shot. Whether or not it's verified, it's been on the news, so people will believe it. Guilty until proven innocent -- the media is spectacular! Although D'Lester points out to me and Josh that it would be a hard sell for anyone. The community is already upset that a Latino was nominated before an African-American, and added to the fact that they are upset that a Latino cop shot the kid, Team Santos could look idiotic for going to L.A. the day looking for votes. Josh decides to send D'Lester out there, which doesn't surprise D'Lester. Josh says that they should have thought to send him to L.A. in the first place. "You can't put me on a plane every time he's going to talk to a black person," says D'Lester. Oh, come on, be a representative for your entire race -- that's easy enough! Josh smiles in that way of both joking and not, and says, "I'm prepared to consider that."
Kate is looking worried but otherwise kind of fantastic. C.J. comes in to tell her she wants none of it, whatever it is: she's not working. Kate, however, has "world crisis" or some such on her mind and jumps right in to tell C.J. that there's a "China/Russia/Kazakhstan thing happening." C.J. wants a nutshell, Kate is trying to be very by-the-book (literally -- the book is in her office), but C.J. just wants the info now. Tarimov "booted" a Chinese delegation from the country, which directly contradicts the work the former president was doing before he was so inconveniently killed. They were negotiating an oil pipeline from Kazakhstan to China. Wait, I saw this same storyline on Dynasty! Come on C.J., throw a martini at Kate for ruining your Saturday. No? Can you at least put on some sort of turban or fur hat for the scene à la Alexis? Not going to fly either? Dang, this show would be so greatly improved with hurled drinks. There's some name confusion -- for those following along at home, Issitov is dead; Tarimov is now in power and kicked out the delegation. (Too many "ov"s.) Back to the situation, China is now rather upset since the deal was trashed. C.J. wearily calls Margaret. Kate sympathetically apologizes: "Sorry...I was golfing." "You golf?" C.J. asks, interested. Kate: "Mini." Tee hee. I'm easy, I laughed.
Josh and D'Lester are on speakerphone with Lou and the team on the bus. Lou's all for canceling, but no one else is so sure -- including Santos, who's very against the idea. Edie suggests going to the house, where there might be "less booing," but Santos doesn't like that idea, since it will look like they are exploiting the family's grief. Come on, Mr. Politician! Get on board, that's what you're supposed to do! Damn "integrity." However, the mayor is doing it. (Now, if the mayor jumped off a cliff, would you do that too?) If Santos doesn't go as well, Donna points out, he'll end up looking callous. It's pretty much lose/lose. Josh tells them to call in a favor to the mayor's office to see if they will work with Team Santos on this. Donna asks about making a statement: they will make one, but a generic one.
Will comes into the room, and C.J. asks him to kill more time with Ellie because "then Kate happened," and she has to deal with it. Kate's defensive, and tells Will she was golfing. C.J.: "Mini." Will proudly tells her, "I've mastered the hole in one with the windmill." "That's a hard one," Kate says appreciatively. Will walks out, and Kate gives a great stare at his retreating backside, which C.J. totally catches. Kate gives a defensive "What?"
Will, Vic, and Ellie are walking. (Where on earth are they going? Did the producers just decide that this episode was short on pedeconferences?) Will asks about their band, which is called Schrödinger's Cat. Vic played with them in college. I'm sure many deep, angsty songs came from that, but now they seem to be doing a decent job of things with weddings and bar mitzvahs. "It's better than it sounds," Ellie adds helpfully. "It would have to be," Will replies. Ellie and Vic are both wide-eyed as Will asks them about nixing "Baby Got Back." Oh no, Will, a wedding is not a wedding without someone on the dance floor to that song at the same time as their grandmother. You can't take that away!
Back to Good Times with Kazakhstan. C.J. doesn't want to call the Russian minister, but Kate prods. Oh my goodness, this gets confusing, even with all of my notes. Basically, the new president is a Russian puppet. He delayed elections, but is making no move to reschedule, so the people are rioting. Troops are starting to line up at the borders. The Chinese that are there could be in danger from the Russians. Kate lays it all on the table: "Best-case scenario, I'm ruining your Saturday. Worst-case scenario, two nuclear powers are positioning themselves to actively engage in an armed conflict over oil." C.J. looks grim, and asks Margaret to get the Russian prime minister on the line.
The debate is back on a TV screen. Edie and Lou are reviewing it to find more quotes for the media to use (and that also make Santos look better than what they've been using). D'Lester arrives. Lou reports that she spoke to the L.A. Mayor's office and is confident that she talked them out of visiting. D'Lester is unsure, and wants to clarify whether they confirmed or are just "thinking about it." She's sure it's a confirmation, they like her, banter, Lou's likable, etc. Donna has walked up, and once she can get a word into Lou's self-lovefest, tells them that the mayor is on his way to the house, and wants to find out whether Santos would like to coordinate press statements. Lou's contact who just loves her so much and would help her out actually doesn't want to talk to her on the phone now. It might be because she just called him a "mealymouth snot" while Donna still had him on the line, but keep on with the people skills, there, Lou. They're in a corner, and Lou announces that Santos won't like it. D'Lester is the voice of reason and just says he might need to get used to that. Lou is frustrated, but sets plans in motion: Ronny's mom's name is Brenda Burke. Lou would like Donna to offer that Congressman Santos would like to pay his respects on the way to the funeral. The timing makes those plans nearly impossible: instead, they need to leave that afternoon to make it to Los Angeles by evening. Lou and D'Lester rock, paper, scissors as to who will tell Santos, and Lou loses.
C.J. is at her desk when Will walks in. He's set with Schrödinger's Cat and going to send Ellie and Vic back in. C.J. argues that he's not, Will counters. C.J. then wins, however, with talk of nuclear powers. Damn, that wins every time.
D'Lester and Lou discuss other ways to spin the situation in L.A. He points out that this is now a national story -- the church will be full of cameras -- and reminds her that they need to look like they have supporters. He's only managing to stress Lou out more. D'Lester wants reinforcements, so Lou requests that Annabeth get Leo there. However, D'Lester had much more major backup in mind. Lou clues in and says no, almost sounding amused. D'Lester just repeats the numbers -- they need 90% of black voters and only have 81%. This is exceptionally bad for Santos because the black vote historically has never had undecideds, but "they don't hate Vinick. And they're not sure they like the idea of Santos. This is not a small problem." Lou looks around with a pouty face, calls Josh, and hands the phone to Lester to do the dirty work.
Will is in front of Ellie and Vic making excuses, but says they can "get the ball rolling": "Everybody's dream scenario. Me planning your wedding." Will asks the couple if there is anything he should know, but instead of maybe mentioning, "I'm pregnant and have dietary restrictions," Ellie explains that she understands her father's obligation to invite certain people, but that overall she wants to keep it simple: she doesn't like the spotlight, and "Vic is a little agoraphobic." There's a bit of phobia banter -- come on, his heart has only stopped a couple of times! At least, if your heart is going to stop, the White House is probably the place to do it; I have to imagine the medical services are top-notch. Back to the task at hand, Will pulls out the White House invitees list, which turns out to be four pages long. And, the tensions begin as they estimate (Vic aghast) that it must be over a thousand names.
In a very similar meeting, C.J., Kate, and Barrow are discussing nuclear powers, and C.J. gets a chance to show off that she can finally differentiate between the "ov"s. They go back and forth; basically, everything is really bad. The best thing they can do is ask the Russians to talk to Tarimov about reopening the negotiations, and C.J. finally says that she'll try. Unfortunately, they already know that the Russians have no desire to do this, and think Tarimov is doing a fine job as president. Kate: "It's a big fat lie." C.J. looks at her and replies, "Oh dear, I should have told them that." She makes an executive decision to get a hold of Bartlet, and in the meantime get the Chinese on the phone to tell them to remain calm. This is only met with dubious stares, but when she challenges them for a better idea, Kate and Barrow just make an exit.
Vic is getting more and more upset as the names continue, while Ellie is calmer (although clearly annoyed) and just trying to just get it done with. Vic begins to pace at some mention of the Queen (of England, naturally) possibly being a guest. He then throws himself back down on the sofa with a sigh.
C.J. is at her desk when Margaret comes in to let them know that it will be a little while before they can get Beijing on the phone. She wants to go back in with the couple, but behind Margaret is a giant furrowed forehead attached to Josh, who's showing a slightly pathetic puppy dog face. C.J.'s shocked Josh is not actually with Santos (which seems fairly valid to me, as well -- what ARE you doing in Washington, Josh, other than being conveniently able to possibly drop in on an old co-worker who is housebound?). He brought donuts, the universal sign of "I need a favor." They sit, and he asks about having Bartlet at the church service the day. C.J. is clearly not hot on the idea, and they go back and forth about logistics and whatnot. He changes tack and asks if she heard about Ronny Burke, but this situation doesn't get him the sympathy he'd hoped for. C.J.: "You knew some people were going to have a tough time with the notion of a Latino president. If it wasn't Ronny Burke, it'd be something else." Josh: "Yeah, well, Ronny Burke seems to be it." C.J. tells him she'll run it by the President. Josh lights up at the notion -- knowing what's coming, I'm a little bit sad at how thankful he looks -- and says, "Bless you." As he leaves, C.J. asks if he's talked to Toby. Josh: "Um, no. I meant to call him, but...I guess I didn't. Did you?" C.J. replies with a really quick no. She wants to make sure he's okay, but can't do it herself because of the investigation. There seems to be an unspoken hint there. Josh just replies, "Yeah, I don't know." He bolts.
Will asks about the Zelikovskys, and explains something about negotiations and steel workers. I think Vic might actually die. He's sitting at the opposite end of the couch, clearly a ticking time bomb. Ellie says fine, and Vic finally snaps. "No! No! This wedding is not the solution to every political problem the White House has!" He doesn't want to add to the 742-person list. He's drawing the line at the Zelikovskys with power and resolution. Sadly, Mrs. Z. was Abbey's college roommate, and Ellie has known her for her entire life. Will quickly points out that they are now at 744 people. Vic looks defeated, but Will is chipper: "The good news is, that's it! It's all about your lists." He pulls out the Ellie Bartlet list, all less than a single page of it. And unfortunately, it sounds like Ellie's maid of honor had her visa tagged by the DEA. Will explains that this was probably just some sort of extra fun that was found in her suitcase, but it doesn't bode well for her attendance at these nuptials: "You've got other friends, right?" Poor Ellie.
Edie and Lou are talking as they wait for Santos to finish up an interview. Lou hasn't yet asked him about going to California that day, and they have no word on the President. Lou, Edie, D'Lester, and Donna sit to discuss Santos's speech. They currently have three working versions: "One where he denounces the cop, one where he doesn't denounce the cop, and one where he loves everybody." In the most random and pointless line of this week's episode, Edie announces that her head hurts. It actually makes more sense here on the page than it did in her delivery. D'Lester says that the church will want to hear him denounce the cop. Enid shrugs as she asks, "On general principle?" D'Lester: "For shooting at children, I think, is the part they have their knickers in a twist about." He took the snark right out of my mouth. Edie protests that the kid had a weapon, and D'Lester agrees that he also had a stolen car. But D'Lester's actually thinking about the big picture, and what he thinks they will want to hear. They go back and forth again, and realize they can't take sides. The option is, "'We are a community divided.'" Edie and D'Lester actually agree that they can't say that, because there are two communities. Edie is arguing that the two communities hate each other, D'Lester argues that it's not true, and both are getting more annoyed. D'Lester, however, manages to deliver sarcasm in a delightful way as he bickers: "Well, maybe some of the folks are a little riled about the coming in and the taking of the jobs..." Edie counters, "Who do you know that wanted an avocado-picking job? Do you know how hot it is out there?" Oh, Edie, you said "picking." That's a softball you just pitched to D'Lester, and he takes advantage: "Yeah. We had about enough of picking with the cotton." Santos walks in and Lou all but leaps out of her chair to get away from the fight. She tells him that "Edie and [D']Lester are fighting about avacados," but that there isn't much progress. Santos is calm and tells her that there is a particular psalm that he'd like to use. Lou freaks out, but in a quiet, professional manner. There is dead silence; Santos goes on, now with a beer in hand, and Lou asks, "A psalm?" She tells him he can't just go out in front of the congregation with a prayer; this wasn't a bad mistake, but he's looking at huge racial challenges: "They don't want you to close your eyes and pray. They want you to open your eyes and lead." Santos just stares, and says, "You want to show me what you've come up with?" Edie looks down; Donna just stares. Santos: "I look forward to seeing a draft." There are more uncomfortable looks as he leaves. D'Lester turns to Lou: "You gonna ask him now about the dead kid's house?" Note to self: don't irritate and insult boss when you have no better options. Will not bode well for job security.
Josh gets out of a taxi with a backpack and some horrible, giant sunglasses. He walks with his head down, NOT AT ALL SUSPICIOUSLY, up to a brownstone. He buzzes one of the units, and there is a furtive, whispered "Yeah." Josh replies, "It's me." There's no response, and he just stares while very severely violating the door's personal space. "Let me in the door," he says. Every apartment visitor's good fortune visits Josh when a neighbor comes out the door so that he can enter. He knocks on the door and Toby answers, stares, and then gives a defiant little lift of his chin. Josh just stares, and then raises his eyebrows and asks, "You gonna invite me in?" Toby steps aside, but still says nothing.
Toby offers Josh something to drink, and then observes dryly, "I had some coffee, but I seem to no longer have any coffee. We can go to the corner, there's a coffee shop. Oh. Right. That's not gonna work." Way to throw a pity party for yourself there, Toby. Josh just stares at him, looking almost resigned. Toby berates him for coming at all, in case someone saw him, but fiddling with his drink and not actually looking at Josh. Josh promises that no one saw him, and Toby doesn't quite buy it. Clearly, that's because he didn't see Josh's exceptional Large Sunglasses Disguise, successfully used by television villains everywhere. Josh's phone rings, and he checks the number and silences it, asking Toby how he's doing. "Indicted, you?" Josh mumbles, "I meant to call, I've just been insane." That hurts -- he should know not to say it if he can't even make it a little bit believable. Toby can clearly tell and just continues his staring, putting his hands on his hips. Josh is leaning against the table, one hand on his own hip -- both looking defiant. I feel like the US Weekly body language expert right now. Although come to think of it, how do you know I'm not? That could be my day job -- I certainly wish it were my day job. "The glaring and spitting seem to indicate that they might not be happy with one another right now." Brilliant. Josh asks Toby if he saw the debate, who replies that it seems like the prep was rushed. Josh gets defensive that Santos was ready, and that they got a four-point bump following. He sounds very much like a kid trying to impress his workaholic absentee father. Toby listens and just replies, "Good," as he takes a sip of his...chocolate milk? Wanting a different subject, and not getting much conversational help on any topic from Toby, he asks, "So -- jail, huh?" That seems polite to me. His phone rings, and again he turns it off. He asks, "You actually going, or are they cutting a deal?" Toby's really going. Josh sits and goes on about how he's a hero to some. Toby adds that he's been called about speaking engagements and a book deal, and that he might take them for the money: "People I'd rather work with can't come within a ten-block radius of me." Josh tries to make him feel better: "You'll be less radioactive in a few months." "Oh yeah?" The venom is apparent. "How many months, you think?"
C.J. is practicing a phone conversation to an audience of Kate, placating her imaginary diplomat and assuring them that Bartlet will speak to Tarimov the net day. Kate picks up where C.J. leaves off and continues, saying she feels confident that they will reopen China-Khazakstan negotiations. Margaret comes in to let them know that "Bejing and a translator" are all ready on the phone. That's fantastic technology -- how do you get an entire country on the phone? Kate and C.J. each pick up a handset. After C.J. wishes him a good morning, she is not able to get a word in edgewise for all the yelling.
Josh checks and again silences his persistent phone. He asks Toby how the kids are; Toby says they're fine, and is making this as hard for Josh as possible with curt, one-word answers. "Must be good to have more time to spend with them." Really, Josh? You couldn't come up with anything more appropriate than that? "It's fantastic," Toby replies. I'm surprised at this point that Josh doesn't add some touching comment about the quality time they'll get in on opposite sides of bulletproof glass once he's in the Big House. Josh's phone rings again and he finally has to answer; Toby sits and hangs his head, radiating anger.
It's Lou, and she minces no words, telling Josh she thinks she just messed up: "I think I just told the Congressman it was his responsibility to solve the race problem in America -- if possible, before noon tomorrow." "That's quite a mouthful," replies Josh calmly. "Kind of pissed him off." It's very interesting to see Lou so close to unglued, since she's been the most confident and together person on this campaign to this point. She's walking a very thin line between defensive and scared -- kudos to Janeane Garofalo for playing this scene perfectly. Josh assures her that Santos will recover. She gives Josh the scheduling rundown -- it seems that she still hasn't asked Santos if he's okay with going to L.A., but it sounds like his staff assumes he will be.
Josh gets off the phone and gives Toby the nutshell version of events. Josh is lamenting, but Toby interrupts with a completely opposite view -- this could be an opportunity. He points out that Santos is charismatic and could turn it around. Josh is genuinely interested -- he seems only to believe it now because it came out of Toby's mouth. He goes on, bolstered, to tell Toby he spoke to C.J. about getting Bartlet there. Toby, however, gives him a "Good luck with that." Josh, sounding mildly surprised, thinks C.J. will come through. When Toby asks what C.J. said specifically, he clarifies his question: "She said she'd take it to the President, see what he thinks?" Uh-oh. Josh says yes. Toby: "That's her catchphrase for 'It's never gonna happen." Josh tries to placate himself, I guess, with, "It was last-minute," but Toby pops his bubble like a bully in the schoolyard. "It has nothing to do with last-minute. It has to do with he doesn't think your guy's gonna win." Josh goes into full defensive mode, asking what he means, Toby answers about how unlikely it is that he would show up. Toby actually looks kind of amused at breaking Josh's heart at this exact moment. After taking a moment, Josh says, murmuring somewhat, "I am constantly amazed...at your ability to continue to be a bastard. It really is something." Toby, having reached whatever sick goal he'd set for himself, thanks Josh, and raises his chocolate milk to him in salute. This seems to be the last straw for Josh, and he gets mad at Toby for the way he's treating him, asking why he came in the first place. Toby spits, "I really have no idea why you think you needed to come here." Josh: "Well, I don't either!" This fight is starting to disintegrate into childish comebacks, I see. Josh just says he'll see him later, and turns to leave. Toby raises his voice over a low growl for the first time during the conversation to spit, "No, you won't. You won't be coming back. At least have the integrity to say that out loud!" Josh pauses, and there are hurt glares on both sides. Toby walks into the kitchen, and Josh leaves. Toby, here's a hint. I understand that you're bitter, but don't test the people who do love you to see if you really could push them away too. Eventually, it probably will work. Fortunately for you, I don't think it will end up being today, but that's only because you're lucky.
Barrow, C.J., and Kate discuss the failed phone call as Will walks in: "Ellie's in tears, I've ruined her wedding, someone else needs to take over." He just seems so helpless, poor guy. When C.J. asks about Margaret being there, Will is having none of it: "You need to step in. Sorry about Central Asia, but it's been a disaster for years. You're really not going to fix it today." Well, yes, but...okay, you know what? With a crying bride on your hands, I'll take that argument. On cue, in comes Margaret with two wedding gowns. She announces that someone needs to talk to Shirley the social secretary (I can't say that without a mental lisp) about the gowns. "I really don't," Will says, and I wonder if he himself is going to snap? Ellie bought her own dress, Margaret: "Which is sweet," but now there's problem with appliqués and possible slave children stitching. (But their fingers are so tiny! Look at the exquisite detail! No?) C.J. just exhales, "Oh God." Kate gives her a look -- I can't tell if she thinks this is insane in comparison to their meeting, or in general, or what. Margaret pawns the gowns off on Josh, but before she leaves tells C.J. that Josh called again, who replies that Margaret should just deal with him herself. Will has to hold the hangers up over his head, as C.J. pats him on the back and prepares him to go back to battle. She tells him about the menu restrictions à la Margaret, and Barrow is the one who asks, surprised if Ellie's pregnant. C.J. and Kate look stunned. Barrow: "Swordfish, soft tuna, cheeses. Am I the only one in the room with kids?," disbelief in his statement. C.J.: "Tell her we'll find her something with an empire waist." Will quips, "I don't even know what that means." Barrow: "In the service of your country, son. From one man who has dealt with weddings to another just being initiated." Will shrugs, hands still up in the air with hangers attached, and walks out smothered by dresses.
Josh arrives back at the office to a call from Margaret. After his initial delight at talking to her again, she tells him that it didn't work out to get the President. As she blithely goes on, Josh knows Toby was absolutely right.
Inglewood (always up to no good), California. Santos and Bram walk into a small house surrounded by Secret Service, the sound of helicopters in the background. Lou is in the kitchen with Brenda Burke, Ronny's mother, and introduces them. Santos offers the usual sympathies, but does seem truly sincere. Brenda seems dazed -- she pressures him to have some food, and he grows more uncomfortable as she keeps insisting that he have something. Her patience, meanwhile, seems to be wearing a tad thin from playing hostess while dealing with the death of her child. The sound of yelling grows in the background. A man, who I believe to be Mr. Burke, is shouting about all of the cars in the street, and at family members who are not able to get to the house. Santos introduces himself, but the man is having none of it. Getting louder with every word, he demands that they move their cars so that the people who matter can get through. Louise visibly recoils as he spits words like bullets at them: "The family needs to be here, you do not." Santos tries to calm him: "Sir, I just want to let you and your family know how very sorry I am for your loss." The man points right at Santos and moves toward him: "You should know better." The Secret Service warns him and pulls him away, and Lou immediately ushers everyone out and thanks Brenda.
Lou walks down what looks to be a hotel hallway (shockingly very similar to many other hotels that they have stayed at -- what a coincidence!). She waits and then knocks very, very softly on a door. As she reaches to knock again, the door is yanked open. A not happy Santos asks her if she has the speech. As she hands it to him, she offers to review it and answer any questions, but he cuts her off and says it will be fine, closing the door. Lou sighs and walks away.
Inside, Helen is watching news coverage of the visit to the Burkes' house, telling him it doesn't look so bad on TV. Santos dumps the speech in the garbage before even looking at it. Helen just asks him, "So you're just going to stand up there and sing 'Oh Heavenly Shepherd'?" They banter, but it's that fun, stressed-out, tension-filled banter that's used to cover dread. "They all think there's something I'm going to get up there and say to bridge the divide. Well there isn't." When Helen murmurs that she doesn't think that's true, he snipes that she should sit down with his staff and discuss, since they all believe that. She holds her head up and tells him that he doesn't have to say the nonexistent Right Thing, but that he does have to say something from the heart. I like her -- in her own way, she seems to get it more than he does. When he throws up his hands, she seems to be like, "Here's just what you have to do." He insists that nobody wants to hear that: "They want to hear what I have to say as the representative for every Latino man, woman, and child in the fifty United States. And let me tell you something. I'm frankly getting very tired of being responsible for every Jose Miguel Rodrigo Garcia Martinez de Lopez in America. I'm exhausted." Helen tells him calmly that's not expected, but Santos insists that it is. He can't do that because he can't make sense of this. He's yelling, wondering why they'd shoot a kid who supposedly was trying to surrender, without waiting to make sure if he was or not. I'm wondering why the kid would walk around with a plastic M-16 in the first place. Helen just looks sad: he's completely got a point, but given the position he's in, it's his job to figure out what to say. Bram comes in to tell them to go.
An entire group of people is now gathered in the Situation Room -- everyone is now dressed for work, and Kate briefs them on what is going on, in front of a giant satellite map. They have detected movement along the borders. It's possible they could be training drills, but...hooves, horses, and all that. China appears to be arming its border.
There's a knock at a door -- aha, it's Toby's door, and it's Josh, bearing coffee. He walks in without an invite this time, and launches right in on Toby: "I've given a lot of thought to the heartwarming insight you decided to share with me about how the president thinks that Santos is a loser, and I think you're full of it." Not about to be baited -- and, I suspect, wanting to yank Josh's chain even more, Toby replies, "Eight packets of Splenda, you couldn't rustle up a bagel?" Josh thinks the real issue is that Toby thinks Santos can't win, and Toby agrees that is what he thinks. However, Josh then goes skipping merrily down Personal Lane, accusing Toby of not being able to handle seeing Josh succeed if Santos does in fact win. Toby's incredulous: "You really think I've brewed up some sort of Freudian fratricidal mania built around your success? You don't think I have anything other than that against the Democratic nominee for president?" Josh then demands other reasons. (Why is it that when Josh argues with anyone, he suddenly sounds like he's in junior high?) So Toby starts in. His main point is that he believes Santos is not presidential material, since he left Washington once before and had to be dragged back and talked into the job. While I think his argument loses a bit of impact, since it sounds like Bartlet had a moment of wavering, as he continues to argue you can see the respect he has for the position. Josh argues that he stepped up when presented with the opportunity. Toby yells back that someone shouldn't have to be presented with it; they should want and need it. This dialogue is starting to give me flashbacks to that other White House show I recapped. He points out (rightly) that, without drive, how will someone make the decisions that need to be made for the country! Josh is reduced to actual squawking: "You don't know he's not that man!" Toby fires back, "You don't know that he is...Is he? Look me in the eye and tell me that you know." Josh is frowning and can't do it. He says nothing. Toby: "That's why the other guy wins."
A choir is singing at the Page Church. Team Santos arrives, minus Santos himself, and Lou greet Leo at the door, making the same excuses about the President that everyone knows really are just excuses. Lou looks absolutely haggard. She suggests that Leo deliver a longer speech to take the pressure off Santos, but Leo's not into that idea. "How did yesterday go?" he asks. Lou sighs: "The visit to Ronny Burke's mother's house was a disaster; the Congressman hates the very idea of the speech, never mind the speech itself. I think he's planning on replacing me with a Labrador retriever." She has stunned Leo into complete speechlessness, and asks, "Is that more information than you were looking for?" "Little bit!" he chirps. It's okay, Lou, I'm an oversharer as well. I know how it goes.
Inside, the minister is preaching, and D'Lester and Donna are talking. Isn't that rude, especially in church, and when you're there to make a good impression? Anyway, Santos is late which, as it turns out, doesn't look very good when he has a speaking engagement. We see Annabeth briefly, but never hear a word from her. Lou's cell rings -- the Santoses are there, and she rushes out to greet them. Again, how come all the talking and rushing in and out during a church service? And answering a phone? I know they're a big deal, but have some manners for the Lord, folks. Lou runs through the names of the key people and where they are sitting, and Santos just walks to her and doesn't actually respond. Leo introduces Santos to mild applause, but Leo is clapping like a kid on Christmas as Santos joins him at the pulpit.
Now comes my favorite story tactic of any political drama -- the Brilliant Unscripted Speech. Again, I'm experiencing serious déjà vu. Santos's prayers are with both Ronny Burke's and the officer's families, but for different reasons. He talks of looking for someone to blame, and the rage that fills him: "And then I try to find compassion -- compassion for the people I blame, compassion for the people I do not understand. Doesn't always work so well." There's a shot of an older man fixing his tie, the first of many long crowd reaction shots that actually don't mesh very well with the rest of the scene. He speaks about hearing Martin Luther King Jr. talk about compassion healing more than vengeance. However, this week taught him that more compassion and effort is required: "And we are all, every one of us, tired." The crowd starts to murmur and nod. Everyone is tired of trying to understand, and of their kids not being safe, and the other trials they face each day. Santos assures them that they have made progress, and that blame will destroy that. Blame won't solve those problems. People loudly start to concur. Santos asks all of them to dig down inside themselves and find compassion: "Because it will keep us on the road. And we will walk together. And work together. And slowly...slowly -- too slowly..." We've come to the Sweeping Upturned Camera View of Majesty: "Things will get better. God bless." A slow golf clap builds into loud applause from everyone. Naturally, this turns into a standing ovation, including one from Santos's wife. The choir picks up. Helen follows Santos out and then takes his hand to leave as the scene fades to white, which gives the very odd impression that they've just died and are heading to heaven.