By Lauren S
It's crunch time with only two weeks to Election Day. And I mean it's literally crunch time -- Vinick breaks an already sore hand when he gets an exuberant handshake from a football player introducing him at a rally, but spends the episode hiding that from the public and only wearing his cast around his staff. Josh is getting campaign advice from Toby, who calls himself "Bob" whenever he calls. He suggests that they campaign in California. When they learn about the trip, the Vinick campaign decides to head there as well, although not without a lot of bickering. Vinick decides to do a press conference in front of the infamous San Andreo nuclear plant, which seems like a huge mistake until he wins over the reporters by coming off as a straight-shooting candidate not afraid to admit a mistake. Meanwhile, Santos realizes his briefcase is missing. The person who found it is none other than Bruno, who proceeds to search through it and finds seemingly damning evidence against Santos inside -- in the form of a checkbook with regular monthly payments to a single mother in Houston who used to work for Mayor Santos -- and tells Vinick about it. Vinick privately gives the briefcase back to Santos the day and tells him that he owes it to the country to make the story public himself, before the election. Santos won't, since it's a family issue -- his deadbeat brother is the father of the child, and took off, and Santos wanted to do the right thing and help her out. Vinick seems not to believe him, but has said that he won't be the one to leak it. We'll have to wait and see about that, since the conversation ended only with more glaring in an industrial kitchen setting, which seems to be the place these two like to have their private moments.
Previously on The West Wing...I'm not sure if you're aware of this, but there was a debate, and Vinick said he thought nuclear power was completely safe. Then many of the previously locked-up states that have nuclear power plants, including California, became too close to call (tm Josh). An absurdly smug Republican named Jane arrived and took Sheila's place on Vinick's staff, wanting to talk only about opposition to gay marriage. Bruno and his little-girl hair didn't think Vinick should make any statement about the nuclear meltdown. And if you think that all sounds exciting, then this episode is for you. And if you think it sounds like the lead-in to a filler episode in between stories that viewers actually care about, well then you're completely right. Oh, and if you came looking for any follow-up to a little thing you might have heard about called The Kiss, this hour will leave you wanting.
Chicago Convention Center. Vinick is making his way through a crowd, shaking hands with a strangely manic smile on his face -- almost a grimace. There are shots of his hand being tugged every which way. Once in his vehicle, Vinick ministers to his hand while Jane is on TV doing a press conference about how he has "always" been opposed to gay marriage. Bob hands Vinick an ice bucket for his hand, and they bicker with Bruno -- Vinick mumbling about how until a couple of years ago he didn't even know about the gay-marriage controversy, Bruno about how Jane's not helping, but has only been keeping them tied with Santos, and Bob firing back that she's stopped their fall in the South. Bruno retaliates that Jane's scaring away the Independents. Vinick reminds us about his little oops of saying that nuclear power was completely safe, right before a nuclear power plant nearly had a meltdown. Bruno insists that it's water under the bridge. Or radioactive steam into the air? Bicker, bicker, bicker. They're going to the Small Business Association of Chicago, and want to be out quickly because Santos will be there afterward. This irks Vinick, but Bruno insists that it is how the last week of an election goes in swing states. Vinick seems defeated already, murmuring, "Chicago'd like me a lot better if I stayed in Florida and let the Santos motorcade create all the traffic jams."
Out of the car, Vinick goes in shaking few hands, and dealing with more questions about whether he still feels nuclear power is completely safe. He's still sporting the manic grimace.
Vinick waits in the bathroom as a Chicago football player introduces him. He runs his old, red, swollen, age-spotted hand under the water. When he comes out, Football sticks out his hand and we go dramatically slow-mo. Oh...no...not...The...Hand! Football shakes Vinick's hand, and as the crowd goes wild. Vinick turns away, and I do believe he's actually screaming.
Back in the all-purpose Suburban, Vinick is being attended to by, presumably, a doctor. Vinick can't even bend his fingers. The doctor wants x-rays, but Bruno and Vinick both jump on him with a chorus of "no!" Bruno (looking over his glasses -- and if he didn't have a goatee, with that hair and those glasses, he'd really look like someone's grandmother, but I digress) explains that they can't get x-rays, since the reporters following Vinick's campaign will suddenly report, "Handshake breaks Vinick's hand." Which...is exactly what happened. The doctor tells Vinick that he believes he has a metacarpal fracture and needs a cast, which Vinick also shoots down, saying that he "can't look like an old man falling apart on the campaign trail." The doctor gives in and grudgingly says that he can re-set the bone and give Vinick a cast that he can remove in public; Bruno welcomes him to politics. Before he opens the door, Vinick reminds the doctor that, if asked, they were discussing healthcare policies in the car. "Well actually, I do have some suggestions about Medicare..." muses the doctor. Vinick just gives him an exasperated look. Come on, doctor: did you really think they actually wanted to hear what you had to contribute to society? Welcome to politics, indeed.
Back inside, Football is now introducing Santos. There's a real-time hearty handshake, nothing breaking this time. Everyone's in a flurry at Santos HQ -- will he stay in Ohio? Will he go to Florida instead? Will he appear on a short-lived Mark Feuerstein sitcom? Oh wait, I think Josh was referring to an actual morning show called Good Morning, Miami. Josh is then told that he has a phone call from someone named Bob. And whichever of the show's "Bob"s you think it could be, you'd be wrong -- it's none other than Toby, secretly doling out campaign advice. Ignoring Josh's jokes, Toby asks what the numbers are in California. When Josh reports that Santos and Vinick are basically tied there, Toby tells him he has to get Santos there immediately. Josh is rattling off states that they are going to, but Toby interrupts: "California's the whole ball game." Continuing in a rote recitation, as if it's something he's repeated thirty-five times that day, Josh assures "Bob" that they're increasing their California media buy, but that the Santos campaign has "got to keep the candidate working in the states where he can shake enough hands to make a difference." Josh goes on and on about how, in California, one can only reach the voters through television. Toby agrees, but Josh won't let him get a word in edgewise until Toby screams his name three times. He calls Josh on getting three hours of sleep a night and being completely frazzled: "Now take a deep breath and listen to me for one second." Sheesh, I'm just happy he got the nasal, monotone-yet-somewhat-panicky voice to stop for a moment. Toby barks, "You can win this thing if you get him out to California right now." He's shut Josh up.
Bruno knocks on the door and is allowed in. Vinick is having total remorse about letting Sheila quit, since it didn't have the desired effect of giving his campaign a "fresh start": "I should have just put Jane out there in front of the cameras, let her energize the base...and ignore her!" "We are ignoring her," Bruno brilliantly quips. Vinick observes that, as of right now, the press is completely on Santos's side and doing all of his work for him. Even with Bartlet sending troops to Kazakhstan, Vinick's nuclear quote is still the biggest news. He sits back in frustrated silence, and Bruno breaks in to say, "You know what I really hate about Jane?" Vinick lets out a little laugh, and I assume that, like me, he's thinking, "That she wasn't the one they sent in to fix the leak at the nuclear plant?" Sadly, Bruno's answer is, "She's not always wrong. We need a new strategy for the last two weeks." Unfortunately for Vinick, Bruno admits that he doesn't have a better idea than she does.
Philadelphia. As Santos walks offstage, he asks Josh, "California?" He reminds Josh that he thought the state was too big, but Josh insists, "That was then." "That was yesterday," Santos points out. Josh insists, Santos unconvinced, that he rethought the idea, and that this makes more sense financially. Instead of buying costly California media and campaigning in Ohio, they buy spots in Ohio and get news coverage of the California trip. Voilà, free media. Why, Lou! Hello! Back as if she hasn't been gone for weeks, she's at the table backing up Josh's argument. Wouldn't it be better if this were all in musical format? Like Santos says, "California?" Josh emphatically answers, "California!" And then a bevy of backup singers, led by Lou, come prancing in doing jazz hands in formation and explaining their logic. It would definitely make this episode a billionty times more entertaining than it is right now. They could chant behind Josh, "Build the lead! Press will explode! Other states will folllll-looooooow." And Josh and Lou join in for the big finale, "California's the keeeeeeeeeeey!" At that, how could Santos do anything but agree? And then in an emphatic last line, Santos adds, "But I want a full schedule of California events tomorrow. From breakfast till lights out." And exit stage right. [Wild applause.]
Vinick is also in Philly, not shaking hands. As his group walks in, they run into Santos and his gang in the hallway. There's a stare-off, and Santos heads the opposite way to the elevator, looking much more assured than Vinick.
Once inside, Vinick says that he wants Santos out of the building before he goes on, so that the media doesn't ignore Vinick's speech for a Santos press conference. Jane moves to turn off the TV featuring said press conference, but Vinick wants to watch it. Santos delivers a smooth answer to a nuclear-power question that makes him look understanding that San Andreo was just an accident, yet also correct in his history of opposition to building nuclear power plants. Jane puts a stop to the "woe is me" that starts to take over the room and shuts off the TV. She instructs Vinick to stick to his own message throughout the rest of the race, but he's defeated as he contends that the press won't let him talk about anything but San Andreo. "Forget about the press," Jane instructs. But Vinick won't: "That's not how I got this far. I don't duck the tough questions." Jane condescendingly tells him that the straight talk isn't right for every situation, but Vinick vents his frustration: the campaign she's running now doesn't represent the real Vinick. He knows the accident won't just go away like the rest keep thinking it will, and asserts that he needs to address it. There's fighting back and forth; voices are being raised. Finally, Vinick says, "I should do a till-they-drop press conference on the nuclear accident." Jane and Bruno are against the idea, but Bob mentions that it worked for someone else on another issue. That's all Vinick needs, and he tells them to set up a press conference in front of the plant in California the day.
Jane takes a moment, announces that her work is done, and quits. She doesn't want to get blamed for the campaign's mistakes, but they don't want more press about trouble with his campaign staff. My partying is cut short as Vinick tells Jane that he doesn't want her to quit. She responds, "I have a reputation to protect." "Quitter?" he asks. "Better than loser," Jane spits. "Then don't lose!" Vinick yells. Jane insists that the press conference is a mistake, but Vinick maintains that if the press gets all of its questions out of its collective system, then it's finally going to be done. He gets Jane by the ego. "If I win the election, you're going to get all the credit. You came onto a sinking ship and you saved the day." "If you lose?" she asks. "Then you came onto a sinking ship and it sank. It's not your fault." Vinick asks Jane to do it his way this time, and then her way the rest of the time until the election. She asks what will happen if they disagree. "Then we'll fight about it." "And we'll end up doing it your way," she surmises. But her brittle-bitch exterior has been cracked, and she gives a little smirk of respect for the old man with the broken hand and his crazy ideas that just might work. Vinick is called to the stage. As they all get up to leave the room, Bruno is the last one out and finds a briefcase. He opens it up, presumably to see whom it belongs to.
Meanwhile, Santos is settling in on the plane and -- can you even guess what's coming? -- asks for his briefcase. Bram goes and tells Otto that Santos needs the briefcase. Otto thinks Bram had it. They go through a few moments of "you had it," "no, YOU had it," which would be playing nicely into the musical theme if they'd just start snapping their hands and doing a few kicky dance moves at each other. Bram and Otto agree to search the plane, and assume that the briefcase must have been checked.
Bruno, meanwhile, is rifling through his new treasure. He holds something he's found inside, and looks up and down, brow furrowed in thought. He finally snaps the case closed thoughtfully.
Back on the plane, Santos asks Bram about his suitcase, despite Bram's best efforts to turn invisible and not catch the Congressman's eye using the stealthy "if I keep my back to him I bet he won't notice me" tactic. He sheepishly exclaims that they can't find it, ha ha, he and Otto each thought the other one had it. Santos is definitely not amused, sounding quite worried as he asks, "You lost my briefcase?" Bram assures him that they are checking all of the compartments on the plane, and that it was probably checked. Not one to just rely on blind hope, Santos orders Bram to call Philadelphia and check everywhere that they were in case it was left behind. As Bram leaves, Lou gives Santos a "What the hell got your panties in a wad?" shrug and sarcastically says, "I hope you didn't have any super-secret strategy memos in that briefcase." Santos interestedly asks, "We have super-secret strategy memos?" "I wish we did," Lou sighs. ["There's a nice one outlined starting here." -- Wing Chun]
Lou is watching the ever-present Jane on MSNBC, announcing Vinick's trip to California. Josh is operating as he does best -- in a full panic. He's on the phone with Toby, railing at the Vinick campaign for trying to steal Santos's free media. Toby calmly tells him just to spin it that Vinick needs to chase Santos out of California. Josh slowly clues in that this would turn all of the stories into "the Santos surge in California." He calls Lou to give her the update and, while on the phone, she asks what Santos keeps in his briefcase. Nothing out of the ordinary, though I feel a bit like I want to giggle that he keeps a toothbrush in there; it's exactly the kind of dorky thing I myself would do, so I have to keep mum. Lou mentions that Santos seems worried about it, but Josh just attributes it to end-of-campaign nerves. "So there's nothing bad in there," Lou confirms. "Like?" Josh replies. Lou: "I don't know -- heroin? Porn?" Josh: "Nah, that's all mine." Hee. But also? This storyline is not making much sense, since everyone seems to think Santos is somehow overreacting about his briefcase's disappearance. I realize that this is a setup for "Oh no! Something incriminating is in there!" However, isn't it only natural to be pissed that the case carrying your papers is missing, no matter who you are or what your job is? I don't know, I guess I'm making too much sense. It must be all of the cold medicine I'm on that's addling my brain. Back to the regularly scheduled wide-eyed astonishment.
A female reporter starts to badger Vinick about whether San Andreo is "completely" safe, and he admits that he never should have used that word in his debate. Josh watches, still on the phone, as Vinick tries to compare nuclear power to driving a car, and how that isn't completely safe. So far, a good point, but unfortunately, Vinick's still coming off as kind of insulting to those Californians who do drive cars -- namely, all of them. Toby's watching, too, and seems to be fixing some sort of a toy truck, which has just caused my coal-black heart to grow at least a size or two. Vinick speaks about needing tougher regulations to keep nuclear power safe, causing a reporter to ask whether he's blaming the Bartlet Administration. Somehow I feel like I've recapped this entire thing before. Vinick takes all of the blame off Bartlet, but also talks about increasing regulations, which earns him the accusation that he didn't worry about that when the plant was built in the first place. Female Reporter has done her homework, and knows all about the letters Vinick wrote, when the plant was being built, about the "burdensome regulations" slowing things down. When accused of pushing hard to get the plant built, Vinick replies, "I don't do anything half-heartedly." This elicits a bit of a giggle from the reporters. Aaaahhhh, the TV giggle of They're Starting to Crack. There's a showdown. Female Reporter continues to ask Vinick whether he regrets writing the letter, until he gives and admits that he does. Josh is baffled, but Toby explains that he's "trying to get it behind him." Toby's also starting to think that Vinick's plan could be working: "He's starting to sound like the straight-talking Arnie again." Josh might throw up. While he's dishing out good news, Toby also lets Josh know, "And he's killing your free media day in California." Okay, now, Toby, I love you, but if you'll just read back a few pages, that was entirely your idea. Josh echoes my thoughts exactly: "Yeah, whose bright idea was that? I forget?"
Lou and Santos are leaving, and Josh's stellar advice is for him to go back inside and set up another press conference. Santos replies, "Dueling press conferences. No." But...a DUEL! Forget the press conference, I want to see swashbuckling. I'd be completely back on board with this campaign if they could add a little spice in the form of swordplay. However, with a dearth of better ideas, Santos heads back inside, which just seems weird and desperate after he's just said goodbye to everyone.
Bruno is watching everything unfold on TV. Jane's counting off that it's now been two hours, forty-eight minutes of press-conference goodness. She's whining about it, but Bruno asks, "You think he might have a better feel for California politics than we do?" Jane bitches. And bitches. And no one cares about the sound of her voice, least of all Bruno, who is actually listening to what Vinick is saying. Vinick continues, "My job is to make the best decision I can with the information I have at the time." He manages to spin the entire thing into a pretty damn good statement on his leadership -- that now he has that much more experience, and better judgment, and is more mature and can bring that to all situations, even managing to bring in Kazakhstan and how that will involve tough decisionmaking. As Bruno and Toby watch on their respective boob tubes, Vinick finally shuts the reporters up. No one has any more questions -- not even Female Reporter, who we've just uselessly learned is named Ellen. Toby appreciatively murmurs, "Damn, this guy is good." Bruno murmurs, "Son of a bitch."
At Vinick's office, Jane takes a call from the Speaker as Vinick walks in to applause from the staff. Bruno walks in and asks Jane what's up. She happily -- yet with a touch of humility, I like to think -- says that the Speaker thinks the press conference was "brilliant." "I hope you took full credit," Bruno replies, and he gets a half smile from Jane. MSNBC wants someone live, and Jane graciously offers to do it.
Vinick asks Bob how they are doing on time, and then tells him that he wants to arrange a quick meeting with Santos alone when they arrive in Los Angeles. Vinick won't give Bob, who doesn't know about the briefcase, the reason. Bob agrees to try, but seems to think that "It's personal" might not necessarily fly with Santos's staff.
Jane is in front of a camera giving a glowing press conference about how Vinick doesn't duck the hard questions, and Bruno just looks bored, which is brilliant. He answers his phone, and it's Josh asking him what's up with this meeting. Bruno plays off the fact that he technically doesn't know about the meeting either (he only knows about the briefcase itself) and agrees with Josh that he's uncomfortable with the situation as well. Bruno reports the call to Vinick and lets him know that he told Josh "the truth": "That it's the first I've heard of [the meeting]." Vinick just lets Bruno know he wants to give the briefcase back: "When in doubt, do the right thing." Damn, but he's getting good tying his necktie with one hand. "The rest of the time, get away with whatever you can." they both chorus simultaneously, and share a laugh. Vinick supposes "one of those Louisiana governors" coined that. "Probably from his jail cell," Bruno adds.
Bruno then starts explaining to Vinick that, because he wasn't expected to win the nomination, Santos wasn't vetted like the other candidates were. He says that the press will now really start to look into his past, so the briefcase will be a moot point, since a scandal like this would come out. However, if it comes out once he's already President...Bruno, how's about you just tell Vinick what you think is right rather than playing in stories? Vinick is playing devil's advocate, saying that other presidents have had illegitimate children, and also that if a candidate had the same views he did, a story like this wouldn't change his vote. This frustrates Bruno to no end. He thinks America doesn't think like that, and goes on to wax poetic about not wanting people to regret their votes. Vinick quickly calls him on it: "Bruno, come on. This is me you're talking to. Please don't try to turn mudslinging into a respect-the-voters spiel." Oh, but upstanding Bruno insists that he does respect the voters, and listens to them, and believes wholeheartedly and unselfishly that they have a right to know about this. Oh, look! I can see the glint of a halo hanging above Bruno's sassy bob! His single legitimate point? That the country shouldn't have a leader worrying about his own scandal when he really needs to worry about trying to control the outbreak of a war in Kazakhstan. And, that's the one point Vinick doesn't come back to.
Santos is on stage, presumably at the California event.
In a grungy kitchen, Vinick waits with the briefcase.
Back in the hallway, Santos is walking with Lou. I'd like to point out how adding a coat has returned her to the professional world of politics. She's explaining why they don't want Santos to meet with Vinick, since they don't know what the meeting is about. And I have to say, from this angle, they actually appear to be two different species, with the top of Lou's head barely brushing Santos's elbow.
Vinick heads over to study some industrial cans of tomato paste as Santos walks in. Seriously, there's nowhere to talk other than kitchens? They greet each other with silent nods. Santos finally breaks the silence: "Whose idea was the press conference?" "I couldn't let you have California all to yourself," Vinick answers. He's quiet, and Santos waits. Finally, Vinick presents the briefcase: "Bruno found it in the holding room in Philadelphia." Santos is doing that patented dad move of straightening his jacket quietly before he blows. They volley back and forth, but the bottom line is that Santos guessed correctly that Bruno looked through the briefcase and that Bruno, Santos, and Vinick are the only ones who know this happened.
As Santos grabs the case and turns to leave, Vinick drops his bomb: "It's not the notes you should be worried about." Santos stops, but keeps his back to Vinick. "The checks you've been writing are a much bigger problem," Vinick adds. Santos turns around: "You think so?" Vinick assures him that they won't say, but that Santos should. Santos, however, is not playing his role as Vinick predicted, agreeing that it's up to him whether he tells or not. Vinick's brow is starting to furrow. He says that it will come out eventually, and names Anita Morales, talking about the press hounding her and her daughter. "Bruno really did his homework, huh?" Santos asks. Vinick points out that Santos's staff would have done the same thing. And, point to Vinick. Vinick plays the big guy, asking, if it comes out after Santos is elected, what will happen then? When he mentions responsibility to the voters, Santos has had enough: "Don't lecture me about responsibilities." Vinick continues, asking him if he can handle the fallout, and whether he wants to put his family and wife through a scandal like that. Santos icily informs him, "My wife knows all about it." There's some news Vinick didn't expect, and it finally quiets him. Santos explains that his brother is a worthless lout who can't be trusted, and that when he messed up and disappeared, Matt took over responsibility for him and now supports his niece. Vinick looks like this is quite a line, and says it would have looked better if Santos had given his brother the money to then pay Anita. Santos agrees, but explains that he can't trust his brother to do that. Vinick drops his gaze, and Santos knows that he doesn't believe the story. Vinick just says, "It doesn't matter what I believe. You know the truth." Santos only nods. They're at a stalemate. Santos only says that it's a family issue, and Vinick looks at him disapprovingly. After Santos leaves, Vinick just cradles his injured hand.