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Before I get started: there was some confusion on the boards about the meaning of the title of the episode. I admit when I first heard it, I thought it was a reference to the fun kind of mushrooms, especially since one of my best friends used surreptitiously to refer to them as "pizza toppings." But I first heard the episode title about two hundred years ago (i.e., before the last break), so it's not surprising that things have changed. Actually, I believe Rob Thomas, er, "straightened" people out about that -- the title is actually an inside joke between him and executive producer Dan Etheridge. Without going into too much detail, if you remove the "ping" from the second word of the title, you'll be able to figure out the gist of it. I'd be worried about chipping away at your innocence if it weren't pretty likely that you...you know, watch the show.
A yellow station wagon pulls up on a dark street and double-parks. A rocking Dandelions song plays as an iPod- and pizza-delivery-uniform-wearing Corny hops out with three pizzas under his left arm. Boy, this place must do good business if it can still turn a profit after accounting for all the times Corny got the munchies. I bet his name's even on the spreadsheet. Anyway, Corny's having a grand old time until someone dressed in black appears behind him and tasers him in the neck. He wonders what he did to piss off Veronica before falling unconscious to the ground.
Neptune High. Veronica parks and gets out of her car, and then Dick pulls up next to her. He bangs her car with his door as he gets out, causing her to exclaim, "Dick! You totally nailed me!" Yeah, much like many of the posters, I don't buy that Veronica would leave herself that, um, wide open. Dick makes a crack about his New Year's party, and is unsympathetic about the fact that he scratched Veronica's paint. All the commotion about the car causes two baseball players to appear and advise Dick to frisk Veronica, since she could be "smuggling junk." Dick evenly counters that they're ones to talk, what with all the pitching and catching they do. And that's as close to the episode title as you're going to get. One of the jocks is the guy who made a big deal about dunking Jackie in the last episode, while the other is a wisp of a blond kid, who tells Dick that they're not saying he's gay "just because [he makes] out with a dude here and there." Yeah, but to borrow a phrase from George Costanza, it doesn't help. But speaking of Seinfeld, the fact that Dick's hair looks like he recently switched to a low-flow showerhead is enough to make me think he's still pretty firmly in the hetero camp.
Logan randomly gives some kid attitude about drinking strawberry soda. I don't think it's the sugar he has a problem with, considering that the smooches he then shares with Hannah are seriously causing my teeth to consider bidding goodbye to this cruel world. Logan sneakily asks if Hannah got in trouble with her dad for all their "No, YOU'RE schmoopy" at the carnival, but the answer is no, so he tells her that he really wants to be alone with her. She invites him to her dad's that Saturday (and from the way she puts it, it sounds like her parents are divorced) if he wants to watch a movie. Logan: "I want. To rip your heart out of your chest and eat it as your dad watches in abject horror." My DVR cut the last part out, but luckily, it was pretty obvious.