By Potes
Meanwhile, Betty complains on the phone about the baby shower plates that she ordered, which inexplicably have a picture of Father Time on them. She bumps into Claire and spills the contents of her purse. In all fairness, Claire was walking with her purse open at a 90-degree angle, with all its contents near the front. The whole incident reminds Claire of when she dropped Daniel on his head in a bucket of ice when he was a baby. Well, that explains something. Betty confesses the baby shower ordeal to Claire. Claire gives her a giant pinch and tells her to wake up. The relationship she's in has no future, says Claire, and the sooner she realizes that, the sooner she'll get back to living her life. Claire has really become the voice of wisdom since she sobered up and started a magazine for post-menopausal women! Commercials.
When we return, Betty practices breaking up with Henry while she hangs decorations, and Hilda fusses over what to wear to go apologize to Coach Diaz. Betty totally calls Hilda out on her crush, and notes that she might want to find out what his actual name is in service of their future makeout sessions. Hilda acknowledges this is the first time she's felt something since Santos died. Betty swoons over Henry. Guess that practice breakup was all for naught. Oh, and then Henry shows up. He wants to talk. He and Betty have been stressing over the short amount of time they have left together, he says, so there's only one thing left to do. As Betty braces herself, Henry says that they have to stay together forever. And ever, Amen. Henry's cousin just got a new job on TransWest airlines, and is willing to share his friends and family discount. So Henry can come to see Betty every other weekend. And once in a while, Betty can see him. Or they can meet in the middle -- also known as Springfield, Missouri -- also known as Queen City of the Ozarks. And they can call and email and video chat. Betty is excited. Henry tells her that she's the most important thing in his life. You know, until the timer pops and the bun comes out. The bell rings. It's Charlie, there for her shower. She gets pissed when she sees Henry kiss Betty goodbye, and so instantly insults both the size and the smell of Betty's house. Betty kind of wishes Renee was there to set fire to this whole situation.
Christina, meanwhile, wakes up to find Stuart not in their bed. She opens the bedroom door to find Stuart, Wili and Marc waiting in the kitchen. Turns out, Stuart called Wili. Wili acknowledges that she needs the baby, and will pay to ensure that Christina follows through. She asks what Christina wants. Christina says she wants nothing, except maybe to punch Stuart in the throat. She grabs her things and walks out the door. Wili is confident that she'll be back -- after all, she has nowhere else to go.
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