Damn! Theyre back to having Sarahs voice-over do the "okay, heres what you need to know" schtick. Sarah sums up her involvement with Spencer, "this rich guy," the Thanksgiving party, and the encounter at his stepmothers place with Spencers quip that if he ever saw her again it would be too soon.
I pour myself a tall glass of milk. The icy milk sucked from the alcoholic udder of juniper berries. In other words, gin.
A teenager is on the phone, ignoring Sarahs supplications of "hel-lo? Flynn, school!" while the pregnant Ashley dithers around looking for her Walkman, because she has to do her affirmations. Sarah, as capable as she was on her last Halloway family job, tells her its on the desk to Flynns report card, which needs to be signed. Ashley shrieks when she sees that Flynn has a "C" in algebra. Big whoop. Sarah tells Ashley that shes going to talk to Flynns teacher today. Sarah keeps trying to break through Flynns conversation and Ashley gets all weepy, saying, "You see how she acts like we arent even here? My therapist says shes punishing me because her fathers away." Sarah tells her to do her affirmations and to sign the report card. Ashley gets this weird simpering smile on her face and walks over to her desk while repeating, "Im naturally enlightened. I am naturally enlightened." Then she has a fit because she cant find a pen and starts screaming. Sarah gives Ashley a pen just as Spencer walks in and says, "Good morning all!" Seeing Sarah, he says, "Oh, and you too." Flynn finally manages to tear herself away from the telephone and flings herself at Spencer, asking what he is doing there. Spencer says hes taking her to school, but Sarah gets all shirty, saying that Flynn is her responsibility. Spencer says that Flynn wont skip because she listens to him. "Then talk to her. Tell her to stop tormenting me," Ashley whines, and now shes sitting in the om-yoga position. Spencer says snidely that hes not the parent and that Flynn probably looks on her as a peer; whether hes talking about Sarah or Ashley is unclear. Ashley heaves herself out of her chair, muttering, "All I need, I have within me. All I need I have within me." Sarah looks at Spencer and says, "Nice," between gritted teeth. Spencer asks, "Why should I be?" and then tells her that "Leya" and he are taking Flynn to the theater that night, so Sarah has the night off from her "little job." Sarah asks who "Leya" is and Spencer tells her, "Cantrell." Sarahs eyes bug out: "The model?" "No, the upholsterer. And why is that so shocking?" Spencer asks. "No, no. You, supermodel. Im there," Sarah concedes sarcastically. Spencer tells her that Leya is very "well-rounded." On which parts of her body is a supermodel ever "well-rounded?" Sarah says, "Youre being clever, right?" "Shes bright, well-read, articulate. Shes the perfect woman," Spencer replies smugly. "And youre -- a man," Sarah says for lack of a better word. Spencer glares at her as Flynn comes flying out of her room, telling him she doesnt want to be late. They leave. Ashley wails that she cant find her belly-pillow and is about to go into her third bout of hysterics for the day when Sarah pulls it out from behind the couch pillows. Who exactly is Sarah supposed to be a babysitter to -- the half-sister or the stepmother?
Then the song that haunts my dreams comes on.
The Time Sarah Turned 21
J.B. walks into Scraggle Rocks music shoppe and tells him he needs some disco music, "On vinyl for that" -- J.B. pretends hes scratching a record -- "sound." "For that" -- Scraggle imitates J.B. -- "sound?" J.B. explains that he was cleaning some old bags hair follicles who was upset because her DJ pulled out of her daughters sweet-sixteen birthday party. "So, youre going to be a party DJ?" Scraggle asks. "How hard can it be? Im getting $600 for the gig, and once I rent the equipment, Im getting $450. $450 for one night!" J.B. explains. Scraggle shows off his music know-how and gives him "cool disco, not disco disco." J.B. is silent for a moment, and you can just see the wheels turning in his head. Slowly. He asks Scraggle to put the music together and J.B. will pay him $100. Scraggles got a better idea: "You said you were clearing $450." J.B. says, "How about $175?" Scraggle persists, "How about we split it fifty-fifty and I help you with the whole gig? I just had everything stolen from my place and my landlords raising my rent [way to work the guilt factor, Scraggs] and then you wouldnt be lugging all that heavy equipment by yourself." J.B. still tries to strike a better deal: "Sixty-forty." Scraggle holds firm: "Fifty-fifty, equal partners." J.B. assents, "Deal," and they shake on it.
Can it be? Really? Am I dreaming, or is that Cecilia walking down the street in the shot? It is Cecilia! She marches up to an apartment and buzzes. A male voice answers, "Hello?" "Oh, hey. Its Cecilia Wiznarski. We met at that singles party, you Heimliched me and kind of saved my --" The orthodontist who saved Cecilias life comes darting out the front door. "Whoa, speedy," Cecilia comments. Orthodontist explains that he was just headed out and that his apartment is right there and then says hes shocked, because Cecilia never called him back. Cecilia says she knows and that he was nice and everything, "But, you know, I just thought: you, me, whats wrong with that picture? So, sorry." Ortho Man says its okay and that the important thing is that she changed her mind. Cecilia tells him thats really not the case: "I need a favor, and I feel wicked asking you this, but youre a dentist, right?" "Im an orthodontist," Ortho Man corrects her. "Right. I chipped my tooth. Its small. Its right here --" Cecilia points in her mouth -- "and it keeps catching on my tongue and its kind of gross, so --" "I could file it for you," Ortho Man suggests. "That would be awesome. Cash is kind of non-existent right now," Cecilia explains. "Its okay. I was just headed to the office. So, how did you chip it anyway?" Ortho Man asks. "Opening a freakin beer bottle!" Cecilia tells him, shaking her head incredulously.
Sarah is on the subway with Flynn, who is gabbing on her cell phone, "I mean was she trying to look like a cow or -- hello? Hello?" "They dont work down here," Sarah tells her, "you might actually have to talk to me." Flynn tells her she doesnt talk to baby-sitters. Sarah retorts, "Its my job, okay? And if you hadnt been skipping school --" "Im back in school, okay? And Ive pretty much been taking care of myself for at least five years so heres an idea: take the money and run cause nobody needs you!" Sarah closes her mouth. Im going to like Flynn. A lot.
At a fancy restaurant, Ortho Man is saying to Cecilia, "You gotta promise me youll use a bottle opener from now on." "It was some foreign brand Ive never even heard of. How was I supposed to know it had a twist-off cap? Anyway, I wish I could pay you for my tooth," Cecilia says. "Oh, just letting me buy you dinner is enough," Ortho Man says shyly, "So, hows anthropology -- right?" Cecilia tells him she had to drop out because she got pneumonia and now has to pay her whole deductible, "to the tune of five grand." Ortho Man is sympathetic, and Cecilia, whos been putting away food as though its her last meal, asks if they can order dessert. Ortho Man stammers that its no problem: "Look, Cecilia, this might be crazy but, well, my receptionist, Macy, shes been bugging me about doing this job-share thing because she wants to go back to school --" Cecilia interrupts him, "What are the hours?" Ortho Man tells her whatever she wants. "Im there," she says and grins.
J.B. and Scraggle are cleaning up after their gig, and Scraggle is complaining, "We should have told them three hours minimum. Now, we are only going to clear $175 apiece." "So, we book more gigs and we make it up," J.B. says. Scraggle mutters something about having to rent the equipment and the van. Ignoring him, J.B. shouts, "Hey!" at Sophie who shouts "hey" back and walks over to them. Scraggle shoves some heavy equipment off into J.B. arms and gets to Sophie before he can. Sophie tells Scraggle that she admits she was worried about them at first, "but you guys actually made disco kinda cool!" "Thats our secret," Scraggle says and asks what kind of music she likes. Sophie tells him her tastes are eclectic. "Sos our library," Scraggle tells her. J.B. glares at them while they talk about doing more gigs for her. "You got any ideas, Id love to hear them. How about lunch?" Scraggle asks. Sophie tells him to get one of her cards from the bar and call her. She walks away. Bamp-chicka-wonk-wonk (tm Wigbee) starts up as Scraggle walks back to J.B., who says, "Explain." Scraggle looks innocent, "I just asked her out, so, dibs." "Dibs?" J.B. and I say to ourselves at the exact same time. Hey, Scraggle Rock, what grade are you in?