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Everyone in this game continues to either be unpleasant or invisible. Li'l Russell decides that Jaison is his true ally and tells him that he suspects there's an immunity idol hidden around camp. Sure enough, he finds it hidden in a large hollow tree and hides it in his roomy underwear. He tells Jaison about it and earns his trust. Then it's time for a combination reward/immunity challenge, which is a very physical basketball/rugby/football-type game. Probst has to stop the game to warn the players against taking any cheap shots, only for Ben to deliberately trip Russell with a nasty kick soon after and get kicked out. It's a Survivor first! With Ben out, Galu easily beats Foa Foa to win fishing gear and a chance to send one member of the tribe to Camp Foa Foa to observe how much they suck. Russell, as the "leader," picks Yasmin to go. But first, the medics must attend to Jeffrey Tambor, as he is having serious problems. His blood pressure is dangerously low after all the activity, and he is deemed unable to continue the game. Back at camp, Yasmin makes herself as unwelcome as possible by insulting the entire tribe and saying they need her help to win challenges because it's just too easy for Galu right now. Then she talks to Ben about how he tackled her during the challenge. He refuses to apologize, instead pointing out her poor grammar (over and over and over again) before it becomes very obvious in interviews that he has a problem with black people. He then spends the rest of the night keeping everyone awake by chopping wood. Despite all of that, they unanimously vote Betsy out because she's the oldest. She was also the only likable member of that tribe.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!After Probst spends two minutes talking about how awesome Li'l Russell was last week, it's Day 4 at Foa Foa. Li'l Russell tells us how great Tribal Council was last night because he single-handedly engineered Marisa's ouster. He actually gives her credit for being a "strong woman" and says he's happy to have her "strong mind" off of his tribe. Didn't he say last week that she was the stupidest player in the game, though? He meets with Betsy on the beach, and she asks him if he's mad at her, presumably for voting for Ashley last night instead of Marisa and urging her tribemates to do the same. Li'l Russell says he's not angry but sad, because Betsy doesn't trust him and he did nothing to her for her to feel that way. He guesses she must just be judging him based on appearances, and soon she'll realize that that was a "huge mistake" on her part. Betsy totally blows all of this off and says they'll just have to agree not to trust each other and move on. Ha! She has no desire to talk to him or listen to his bullshit. Betsy interviews that Marisa was probably voted out for speaking her mind to Li'l Russell, but that doesn't mean she'll be afraid to do the same. Oh. Well, it was nice knowing you, Betsy.
Hey! The opening credits are back and they're filled with a bunch of people I've never seen before. And Probst is in there, too! And some native guy that the camera zooms in and out of in a really cheesy way! But no Marisa. That kind of sucks.
So we head on over to Galu for their ten-second appearance. Yasmin complains that she's being eaten alive by insects and asks Dave Ball why they're going for her but not touching him. "Cause you're funky, baby," Dave Ball says. Also because he has a long-sleeve shirt on buttoned up to his chin and long pants on while Yasmin is showing a lot more skin in her tank top and jean shorts. It's all about convenience in bug world. Yasmin rejects the outdoors entirely and asks why anyone would choose to be out there. Um, for a million dollars? For some reason, the bug bites mean that Yasmin has to walk bow-legged. Although it might be the stick that we'll later discover is wedged pretty far up her ass. She interviews that people always told her that "the hood" of Detroit was the hardest place on Earth, but it turns out that it's the jungles of Samoa. Wrong! The correct answer is one of those places in the Third World where the water is malaria, the earth is poop, and the air is flies. Now stop complaining.
Whatever, Galu! Let's go back to Foa Foa. Ben kills a tiny lizard and thinks he's awesome. I'm pretty sure you could get more protein from a bug than that little thing. But why are we watching Ben when we could be watching Li'l Russell? Jaison talks to him about the Marisa vote, and how surprised he was at how "aggressive" the anti-Marisa contingent was about voting her off. He thinks it was personal, but Li'l Russell says it was all about getting rid of a potentially powerful player. Jaison points out that Ben's reasons for voting for Marisa were obviously personal, to which Li'l Russell just says he trusts Jaison much more than Ben. "Do you?" Jaison asks, not sounding like he believes him. As it turns out, he does, as he interviews that Jaison is a perfect ally because he's calm, cool, and honest. Can Li'l Russell please put some pants on already? I don't need to see Li'l Li'l Russell. No one does. Li'l Russell decides to tell Jaison a "secret": he suspects there is an immunity idol hidden somewhere in their camp. Well, duh. There's no Exile Island this season and this show just loves its hidden immunity idols even though they rarely do anything for anyone. Last season, even the fake immunity idol was useless. Li'l Russell is hoping to find it just by poking around, because if he can find it before any clues come to light, then no one else will have a chance. So, he heads for the well and looks around. Li'l Russell interviews that if he could find the idol now, he would be a genius. No one in this game has ever found the idol without a clue before. While everyone else sits around eating tiny bits of lizard, Li'l Russell pokes his head in the hollow of a tree just a few feet away from the campfire. Mick asks him what he's doing, and Li'l Russell says he's looking for the immunity idol. Way to keep a secret, guy. Sure enough, there is an idol in that tree hollow after all, and Li'l Russell is able to grab it and stuff it in his underwear without anyone being the wiser. Okay, that is pretty impressive, I must admit.
Li'l Russell meets with Jaison, who stumbles on something on the forest floor and lets out an "ow!" no doubt because of those blisters from having no socks. Li'l Russell shows him that he does, in fact, have the idol. Why tell anyone? I think it's because Li'l Russell is so proud of himself that he just has to share it with somebody. Jaison says he's excited that "we" have the idol. Um, no. Li'l Russell has the idol. It's not a group project. Li'l Russell interviews that his original plan was not to tell anyone if he found the idol, but he wanted Jaison's trust and figured this was a good way to earn it. That said, he has no intention of giving Jaison the idol and every intention of letting him think he would.
After the break, it's Day 5 and we are STILL hanging out at Foa Foa. Betsy is way too excited to get treemail with Jeffrey Tambor, and seems to be angling to make an old people alliance with him on the way. Jeffrey Tambor says he's not as worried about his age making him a target after not getting any votes the other night, and hopes that in today's challenge he'll be able to show his team that he is not their weakest member. Even though he is. Meanwhile, Ashley talks to Li'l Russell about the person they vote out being whoever is worse at challenges between Betsy and Jeffrey Tambor. Liz interviews that she wants Jeffrey Tambor to go because he "cannot compete physically." Mick gets to read the treemail because he is the meaningless leader. It looks like the reward challenge will be a physical one and probably involve the contestants having to beat each other up. These challenges are always so ill-conceived, and yet, fun to watch. The treemail also came with body paint so the contestants can paint themselves up like Samoan warriors. So, if you're a real Samoan warrior or just someone who is Samoan or appreciates Samoan culture, you'll want to look away before you're insulted by Survior's best approximation. Jeffrey Tambor claims to be excited about this challenge because one-on-one physical battles are his forte. "Someone's gettin' hurt, and it ain't our team," he says. Well, the English language just took a bit of a blow there. Nice one, Jeffrey Tambor!
The teams arrive at a mud pit. Galu is shocked to see that Marisa was voted out. I am shocked to see that Shambo isn't wearing any awesome facepaint. What the hell? You're going to have a mullet but not put on facepaint? LAME. Probst explains the challenge: there are three balls for three contestants from each tribe to fight over. They must get them and pass them to one of their three tribemates standing on a platform, who will then shoot it across the mud pit and into their team's basket for a point. After each point, the three people in the mud pit and on the platform switch places and the game starts again. The first tribe to get three points wins immunity and reward. What?? Immunity AND reward? I hate double challenges. The reward is fishing gear and a twist that will be revealed after the challenge. Galu chooses to sit Monica out, and we begin.
For the first round, we have Brett, Erik, and Dave Ball in the pit for Galu and Shamo, blonde chick, and the girl who isn't Monica shooting. If this show isn't going to make any effort in telling me who these players are then I'm certainly not going to make the effort to look them up. For Foa Foa, it'll be Mick, Li'l Russell, and Jeffrey Tambor in the pit and Liz, Betsy, and the long-haired blonde girl shooting. Probst says go and the men run into each other and wrestle. Jeffrey Tambor gets a ball to Betsy, but her shot is terrible. Two balls get in the hands of the Galu ladies, who also miss. Probst keeps calling Jeffrey Tambor a name that isn't Jeffrey Tambor or Mike, so whatever. Li'l Russell piledrives Brett. Erik nails Mick, who rolls on the ground in pain. Finally, Liz makes a successful shot to give Foa Foa a point. The mud pit team gets to sit out the round, and Jeffrey Tambor is clearly hurting.
up, we have the women down in the pit and the remaining players who haven't gone at all yet on the platforms -- Russell, Yasmin, and John for Galu and Ashley, Ben, and Jaison for Foa Foa. Ben is wearing tight little yellow underwears like a fool. I didn't think a contestant could have more embarrassing underwear than Li'l Russell, but Ben did it! Probst says go, and I cannot wait to see Shambo mess some ladies up. Except she gets knocked down immediately and is ineffective. Disappointing! John takes a shot, but it's short. He's a rocket scientist, not an athlete. A chickfight between the woman who isn't Monica and a blonde girl on Foa Foa results in exposed breasts and choking on the part of (I think) the girl who isn't Monica. Probst warns her not to choke. OH! And then! Shambo finally comes through and nails Liz as she's about to catch a ball. "Easy on the face!" Probst tells her. John gets another shot, and this time he makes it. One point for Galu!
With Liz suffering from an indented face in the shape of Shambo's hands and the blonde girl dealing with a collapsed windpipe, Probst calls the tribes together for a refresher course on the rules. He says if he sees another hit to the face or neck or any "cheap shots," intentional or no, he will kick the perpetrator out of the challenge. He starts the third round, with the men on the platforms and the men/women combo team on the ground. He calls go, and Yasmin immediately grabs ahold of Ashley's neck and takes her down. But apparently that's okay. Russell and Jaison mix it up while Ben goes after John. There's a little bit of contact between Ben and Yasmin when he pushes her away from a ball. It was a push, but it was almost certainly a lighter one than he would have given to a male opponent. Brett takes a shot and, in trying to catch the ball that misses the net by a mile, Ben is pushed by Russell, who then gets the ball. Ben is so angry that he straight-up kicks Russell as he runs away, taking his feet out from under him. Eagle-eyed Probst sees this and stops the challenge to kick Ben out. Good. That was a dick move, and he's wearing heavy boots, too, so it was probably pretty painful. Probst says this is the first time in the history of this show that he's had to kick someone out of the challenge. Ben sits in the penalty box while Betsy shakes her head in disappointment. Now Foa Foa has to play two people in the pit against Galu's three. Which probably isn't a problem for Ashley (Russell and John wouldn't dare touch her) but will suck hard for Jaison. Probst starts the game over again, and Russell heads straight for Jaison while John and Yasmin grab all three balls and hand them to the people on the platforms. Ashley does nothing. Erik quickly gets a second point for Galu.
Fourth round! It's the men on the ground and the women on the platform. Probst calls go, and Li'l Russell just barrels into Dave Ball. He also manages to grab a ball, which he passes to Liz, who misses the shot. Jeffrey Tambor also has a ball, but Erik slams into him and takes it away. "Big bodies colliding!" Probst says. He loves the man-on-man action. The hit takes the wind out of Jeffrey Tambor's sails, which didn't have a whole lot of wind in them to begin with, and he resorts to standing around looking winded and contributing nothing while the women on his team yell at him to do something. Too late! The girl who isn't Monica scores a third and final point for Galu, giving them the win.
But it's not over yet. First the teams must stand on their mats so Probst can lecture Ben on his history-making transgression. He gives Ben a chance to apologize for letting his team down, only for Ben to say "outlaw, baby!" Yes, you are such an outlaw with your wimpy little bitch kick. Probst hands Galu the idol again as heroic music plays for our team of non-assholes. Probst says it's time for the twist, and tells their "leader" Russell to come forward. He reads off a scroll that Russell has to choose one person from Galu to go back to Foa Foa's camp with them and observe their Tribal Council, after which he'll return to Galu's camp. Russell picks "his homegirl" Yasmin, who is so his homegirl that he pronounces her name "Jasmine." Probst hands her a secret scroll and tells Galu to take their fishing gear and leave. They do. Foa Foa sticks around so Yasmin can stand there awkwardly and Probst can tell Jeffrey Tambor to stay behind so medical can look at him.
After the break, Jeffrey Tambor gets his blood pressure checked out by the medical team as his tribe (and Yasmin) watch. His blood pressure is 92/60, which is low. Enh. I've had that blood pressure reading before when I went to the doctor's office before I ate breakfast, and I'm fine. Jeffrey Tambor is helped to his feet. He says he's feeling "a little woozy," and then he collapses as, on the soundtrack, a bell tolls for him. Probst is concerned, as is Mick, who uses his doctor skills to say that Jeffrey Tambor is at risk of "a big heart attack." Soon enough, Jeffrey Tambor gets to his feet under his own power, but now his blood pressure is 80/60. Yeah, that's bad news. Probst asks if "a couple of canteens of water back at camp" will fix Jeffrey Tambor up. Uh ... no. Come on. The medical lady says they've given Jeffrey Tambor water and it's been forty minutes since any physical activity and he's still in dire straights. His heart can't take this game, so they're pulling him out of it. Well, great. How about we don't cast old people who are also overweight anymore? Or if we do, we don't have them compete in challenges like these? Come the fuck on. This show isn't fun if people leave because of injuries instead of being voted out. Unless it's Li'l Russell leaving, which is fine with me. Foa Foa (and Yasmin, I guess) say good-bye to Jeffrey Tambor, who interviews that Galu "never got [him] down in the pit," so he was able to show that he could be tough when necessary. Really? Because he showed me that if you don't take care of your body over your lifetime, it will eventually let you down. Whereas if you do take care of it, you can be Rudy from Season 1 and last almost the entire game despite being like fifty years older than everyone else and openly hating them. Probst says that despite being down another member, Foa Foa is still going to Tribal Council tonight. Yasmin appears to be crying. What's her deal? How is this at all upsetting for her? She's more emotional than the people on Jeffrey Tambor's tribe, who are now even more screwed than before. Hilarious epic tragedy music plays as Jeffrey Tambor is loaded into a van and taken away. Ha! No ambulance or helicopter for him! Mick interviews that things are not looking good for his tribe.
Whaaa? We get to see Galu again? No way! After a shot of a fish that looks a lot like Jeffrey Tambor (seriously, that thing is CREEPY. And, now, more identifiable than half of Galu), we see Shanana swimming with the newly-acquired fishing gear, ready to show everyone how awesome she is at spear-fishing. Everyone waits for her to return, certain she'll come bearing fish since she told them all that she was really good at it. Cut to Shamwow causally swimming in the lagoon and saying this is the first bath she's had in five days. Ew. No wonder her tribe is so happy she isn't there. Oh, also? She didn't catch any fish. She blames the poor visibility of the water. I wish that was the case, but the water was crystal-clear when they took that shot of the Tamborfish. She finally returns to camp with good news and bad news. Um, I think it's just bad news, Shambo. She didn't catch anything AND she managed to lose the mouthpiece part of the snorkel, although she won't admit to breaking it, saying "it floated off" and "there's nothing I can do." So, what's the good news? "There are hundreds of thousands of fish on the reef." Okay. Laura, which is name of the girl who isn't Monica, gives us her take on all of this: "the good news is -- you'll never believe it -- there's fish in the ocean." She puts hand up to her mouth in fake shock. But wait, Laura! There's more. Shambo also just put a big ol' target on her back, which means your chances of not getting voted out just got a lot better, if Galu ever actually loses an immunity challenge. So, in a way, it is good news. Also, you have proven to be entertaining as well as useful to your tribe. "You just signed your own death warrant," Laura says of Shambo.
But let's return to Foa Foa. Yasmin tries to be friendly and introduce herself to the tribe, which means they all have to gather together and listen to her. She says she's a professional hairstylist and she is not their enemy. In fact, she'd love to help them strategize because "I don't like a not fair fight." So, that's insulting. "Why be matched up with people that's not matched up with the right people because then it's like taking candy from a baby. Who the hell wants to do that?" Um, people who want to win a million dollars? But apparently Yasmin is playing this game for the self esteem boost, which she won't get by playing against Foa Foa, who it's a "cakewalk" to beat. The rest of Foa Foa are forced to listen to this while trying not to voice their outrage just in case they need Yasmin somewhere down the line. But they are seething inside. Jaison interviews: "I was like, 'screw you.'" As Li'l Russell just walks away, Yasmin continues that Foa Foa appears to lack strategy, "no offense." What is with this woman? And now she wants to talk to Ben "in private," like her stay at Foa Foa gives her some kind power over these people? Li'l Russell interviews that he does not appreciate what Yasmin has to say, and he will disrespect her forever more and make her regret what she said. Except that he keeps making his tribemates feel uncomfortable and then they're weaker for challenges, so they keep losing and now they're down by three members. Keep it up, and it won't matter how much you hate Yasmin because your tribe will be decimated come the merge.
Yasmin wanders off to read her secret scroll. It's the first clue to the immunity idol. I'm not going to bother writing it down for you because we all know that Li'l Russell already found it. Yasmin figures out that the idol must be in a tree, but points out that this place is full of trees so that doesn't help her. Instead, she pulls Ben aside. He's friendly enough to her despite her terrible first impression, saying "sure!" when she says she wants to talk. "Let's talk about cheap shots," she says, sounding like a teacher. Ben, just kick her. It's okay in this case. Apparently at some point during the challenge Yasmin felt that Ben tackled her "like a dude." You mean that light push? Please. Ben rather diplomatically (for Ben, anyway), says that was the game and it wasn't personal. Suddenly, Yasmin gets all upset, saying it's just not right for a guy to tackle a girl. Yeah, Yasmin? It's a million freaking dollars. If you don't like guys being allowed to tackle girls like that you need to take it up with the people who designed the challenge. Yasmin says Ben was being "very disrespectful." Ben says she went after his teammate, and he was helping his team to win, simple as that. "You're not showing me no sympathy!" Yasmin says. Ben loses his patience a bit and says, "listen, Grandma Stool." Huh? Oh, he said "grammar school." Ha! But it's not like Ben sounds much more educated that Yasmin does, let's be honest. Yasmin calls Ben "ignorant." Come on, Yasmin. You're the one who sounds ignorant. Meanwhile, in the shelter, Jaison and Ashley can hear Yasmin arguing away. Ben interviews that Yasmin is a "piece of work" with a "big mouth." And she smells bad. Because I'm sure Ben smells like fucking roses. He says she's close to being a hooker. I have to wonder if he would have said or thought that if Yasmin was white. Okay, you know what? I pretty much know that he wouldn't have said the hooker remark nor the smelling bad thing if she was white. So now my hate must rapidly transfer from Yasmin to Ben. And also, to a certain extent, the casting people. Way to cast a racist, guys. I can't wait to see him win a million dollars. Yasmin ends the argument by calling Ben a "big sissy." He calls her out for the bad grammar again. Yeah, first time was okay. The second and third time it sounds like you can't think of anything else to go at her with. Think fast, outlaw.
Ben and Yasmin return to the camp area and continue their fight while everyone else sits around looking uncomfortable. Ashley interviews that Ben is a "wild card" who says and does stupid things at challenges. Yasmin storms off, and Ben tells his tribe that she is "ghetto trash" who needs to "go back to eating ketchup sandwiches and drinkin' Kool-Aid." I'm sure he said much worse than that, but the producers chose not to show the seriously racist stuff because it only makes this show look bad for casting a racist. Anyway, no one on Foa Foa that we can see calls Ben out for saying this stuff, so they all suck now as far as I'm concerned. Li'l Russell interviews that he is now enjoying Yasmin's visit, because it means confrontation at Ben's expense.
Night falls on Foa Foa. While everyone else tries to sleep, Ben makes all kinds of noise, scraping the flint and chopping great amounts of wood. Ashley says that now they'll have to make some kind of rule about being quiet and respectful when people are trying to sleep because of Ben. This should go without saying, but so should rules about not kicking people. Ben is such an outlaw, y'all! He keeps the people awake! The morning, everyone looks tired and it's Ben's fault for staying up all night to chop wood. Betsy doesn't understand what Ben was thinking, but I'm sure she doesn't mind Ben making himself a target. Jaison and Mick talk about Ben. Jaison is pretty sick of him, but Mick tries to be diplomatic. Jaison says Ben's "outlaw" persona is probably just a façade and he isn't a badass at all. Mick agrees with that. Jaison says it's not like Ben's helped them out in challenges very much, a.k.a. we don't need him so can we please vote the racist out of the tribe? Meanwhile, Betsy recognizes that she'll have to turn the tribe against Ben to save her own ass. She talks to Mick, saying that they don't need Ben for the challenges, especially since he's actually hurt them in challenges by getting kicked out. And yet, Mick interviews that Betsy is probably going home tonight, because she's the "weakest link." Idiot. I'd totally take a female cop over Ben. On the other hand, Mick says, Ben has a lot of strikes against him. Three, in fact. Which means he should be out. GET RID OF HIM! HE IS NOW WORSE THAN LI'L RUSSELL.
Betsy and the two blonde girls meet in the woods for a chat about "woman's intuition." Betsy loves her some woman's intuition. I don't think woman's intuition is admissible in court, so she might want to lay off it a bit. She encourages a fairly disinterested Natalie to choose to keep the motherly police woman over an outlaw "who's a pain in the ass." She says the fact that Ben got kicked out of the challenge alone should be enough to send him home tonight. Meanwhile, Ashley is no doubt remembering how Betsy called her the weakest link in the last Tribal Council. Oh, and voted for her. Oops! Ashley says she's started to reconsider voting Betsy out tonight since Ben is such a turd. Also think about how you really need to keep as many women on your tribe as possible because once Betsy goes, you're one step closer to being .
Ashley goes to Liz, who wants to get rid of Betsy because they need all the strength they can get after voting Marisa out. Ashley says that Ben getting kicked out of the challenge hurt them more than Betsy could have, not to mention he's ruining camp morale. "Betsy's a cop," Ashley says in her favor. "She's slow," Liz says. Liz interviews that Betsy is 47 and Ben is 28, so obviously he is better for the tribe in challenges and Ashley must be stupid not to realize that. Uh huh, Liz. Do you think Ben's racism extends solely to black people? Do you really think he'd want to keep a blonde woman over you? Weren't you the one who was all concerned about people holding negative stereotypes about Asians against you? It might be a good idea to get rid of the most likely candidate to do that. Liz runs to Li'l Russell to tell on Ashley for wanting to vote for Ben instead of Betsy. Li'l Russell wants Betsy gone ASAP because she doesn't trust him, and gets Liz and Jaison's words that they'll vote for her. Li'l Russell interviews that anyone who threatens him goes home. Okay, you've managed to have a hand in one person so far. Don't get too confident. He says Ashley is going home after Betsy. Ben is staying because Li'l Russell wishes it so and his tribemates are too short-sighted to challenge it.
Foa Foa + Yasmin arrive at Tribal Council. Yasmin sits in what will probably end up being the jury bench and Probst begins, saying that the tribe seemed to agree that Marisa was a negative force dragging the team down and causing them to do poorly in challenges. He asks Liz if the team is "one big happy family" now that she's gone. Liz says they are, although losing another challenge was disappointing. Probst asks her if Yasmin's visit to their united tribe was a happy one. Of course not! Liz calls Ben and Yasmin's fight a "minor incident." Probst asks Ben about this. Ben says that Yasmin accused him of the cheap shot of tackling a girl even though there were no rules against it. Not like Ben plays by the rules anyway. He says Yasmin called him a sissy and used poor grammar that made him feel like he was talking to an idiot. Give the poor grammar thing a rest, Ben. Oh, but then he calls her "ghetto trash" and Liz cringes and Jaison rubs his face because they must know now that they are going to look like such an assholes for keeping Ben around over Betsy. "She needs to go back to where she came from," Ben concludes. If anyone else said that, I would assume they meant she should go back to Galu. But since it's Ben, he probably means Africa. And if he doesn't go home tonight for that then I have no hope for this tribe.
Probst turns to Li'l Russell for his opinion on the matter. Li'l Russell takes Ben's side, pointing out that Yasmin offended them as soon as she arrived when she said beating Foa Foa in challenges was like taking candy from a baby. He says it was disrespectful, and when someone comes into your house and insults you, you kick her out of your house. Um, except that no one kicked Yasmin out of anywhere. They all just stood there and took it. Li'l Russell and Ben high-five. Awesomely, Betsy is sitting between them and you can see her eyes roll from across the set. Jaison says Yasmin's visit isn't important right now. They need to win challenges, plain and simple. Probst asks Mick, as the "leader," if he approves of the way Ben went about defending the tribe. "That's how Benny rolls," Mick says. Mick, you are such a non-entity. Betsy can't keep quiet any longer and says that Ben's mouthing off, midnight wood chopping, and getting kicked out of the challenge should be cause to vote him out tonight, and yet she's the only person who brought her bag to Tribal Council. That's because your tribe is full of morons, Betsy.
Probst asks Ashley if Ben getting kicked out of the challenge hurt their chances. Ashley says it did, because it left her and Jaison against two guys and a girl. Probst asks Ben once again if he regrets getting kicked out of the challenge. Ben says he didn't realize that they were playing according to Probst's "sissy rules." Probst just sits there and takes it. Do NOT give him another host Emmy year, just for that. Phil Keoghan would have kicked Ben's ass. I really expected better from Probst here. Ben says he regrets that he couldn't help his teammates but he does not regret tripping Russell, especially since everyone else was being much worse than he was. And also because Russell is black. Ben doesn't say that, but come on. I have no intention of giving him the benefit of a doubt. Probst asks if the trip was intentional and Ben says it absolutely was because he saw that Russell needed to be taken down and he knew he couldn't do it by tackling him. Probst asks Ben what he thinks his chances of winning this game are. Ben says they're as good as anybody's. Which is true. Why not? You think every single winner of this game has been a good person? More often than not, it's the opposite. Ben says he doesn't start fights with people, but he will respond to them.
Probst says it's time to vote, but first Yasmin has to get going. She gives Ben the evil eye on her way out. Betsy votes for Ben and sings the Cops theme song. Also, I have a feeling that Ben should never set foot in New Hampshire because he's going to get like thirty tickets immediately upon crossing the border. Ben votes for Betsy, calling her a "bad cop" and shooting a finger gun at the camera. Shooting a cop? Well, now he'll get tickets everywhere he goes! Good move, asshole.
Probst returns with the urn. First vote is for Betsy. Second vote is for Ben. Then a second vote for Betsy. And a third. Ugh. And a fourth. Betsy figures she's done. And she is. Shame on you, Foa Foa. Let's hope that week we'll get to spend more than five minutes with the good people of Galu, because I can't stand Foa Foa.
Hey! It's time for Betsy's family moment, presenting by those bastards at Sears. She has a husband and kids to go home to, so in the end, I think she wins over Ben.
You can read more from Sara Morrison at L.A.me, which she occasionally updates when she has something to complain about. Or you can email her at saramorrison@gmail.com.