Survivor celebrates Thanksgiving with a recap episode that's light on the never-before-seen clips and heavy on the boring summaries that barely scratch the surface or tell us anything new. In fact, there's more of the same Fang-bashing, including hating on Ken's choice to pick Kelly over Bob or Sugar in the tribe re-shuffle, a choice that proved to work very well in his favor in retrospect, something that was sorely lacking in this retrospective.
So, what did we learn? We saw that Marcus and Jacquie got close in the few days they had together before she was voted off, Randy and Matty were attacked by the leeches that dwell in the Fang pond, and Sugar spent her time on Exile alternating between craft projects, topless sunbathing, and crying. We also saw way-too-brief clips of some of the contestants' audition videos, including Bob being attacked by his school's lunch ladies and Randy being way too into his long-dead dog.
Well, it's Thanksgiving, and this year I'm giving thanks for CBS's decision to air a lame "new" recap episode for me to recap. They're promising there will be some never-before-seen footage to make this worth my while, but somehow I doubt it. They should have just aired the entire Tribal Council from last week's episode from all the different camera angles. That would have been awesome.
Probst welcomes us with a promise that we're going to see some new footage. We see Susie and Crystal eat bugs, and then Randy tells us "if you get me, you're not offended by me." Clearly, they edited out the part in the middle where he said "and you're a white male." And then there's Corinne, emphatically saying she wants to kill Sugar. That's at least two people on Corinne's hit list, but I'll bet neither Susie nor Sugar are exactly scared, since Corinne is all talk and curly hair. We're also going to see audition tapes, which I am actually excited about. And last but not least, there's Probst's rampant Fang-bashing, as he tells us we'll get the "unlikely story" of how the "underdogs" "came out on top." We hear quotes from all of the contestants left in the game and then we begin with the beginning: the first tribe selection. Which means that you just read a recap of a recap of a recap. It's the most boring Matryoshka doll ever!
Probst claims that Fang "set themselves up for failure" by picking the tribe members they did, even though WE ALL NOW KNOW that those picks were pretty good. For example, Crystal's pick of Susie over one of the alpha males? Totally worked out for her when she needed Susie's vote to boot Marcus. Then again, what if Crystal had picked Marcus instead? They would have been super-tight as soon as they found out about their shared connection to Kenny Cox. Oh well! Sucks for Marcus that that didn't happen. We see GC pick Ken, and how is that a bad pick? It was at the end when all of Probst's favorite he-men were already selected, and Ken was instrumental in Fang's only immunity challenge win. Probst says Fang was "physically weaker" than Kota, and "this would prove to be their demise." Except NOT REALLY, since they won one out of three challenges before the tribes were switched up, at which time the "horrible" pick of Susie went to Kota and super awesome physical threat Ace came to Fang, where he proceeded to hit himself in the face, cry about it, and win nothing. Then we get a montage of Kota's many victories to demonstrate Fang's suckiness. We don't see any clips of Fang winning challenges, but we do see Matty say that he's all discouraged and his tribe sucks.
Probst says that Fang fought all the time, and we get to see Crystal order GC to eat his rice once more. That was nice to see again. And there's GC and Randy fighting with each other, which we now know was a result of GC's over defensiveness and Randy's racism. We get one-second-long looks at Michelle and Gillian as their torches are snuffed. Probst is forced to admit that Kota lost one member in Paloma, "but they remained rational and united." Except for the fact that Kelly hated everyone left in the game and voted Jacquie out as soon as possible, which was the beginning of the end of the Onion alliance. So really, it was Paloma's boot that sealed Kota's fate. Also, shame on this show for not spending more time with Paloma so we could see her threat to "prounce" on her opponents.
Probst gives some love to Marcus, saying he was an obvious frontrunner to win this game, but then he has to admit that the frontrunner doesn't always come out on top. And in fact, the frontrunner never wins Survivor. Which makes the real frontrunner the second-to-last person you'd ever expect to win this game (the last person you'd ever expect to win having been voted out, like, first). Don't we know this by now? And if not, why not? Probst continues that "amazingly," three of the four members of the "early powerhouse alliance" have been voted out. Now we'll see how a group of underdogs beat them. Except that I wouldn't consider Crystal an underdog. Going into this season, I thought she'd kick everyone's ass with her blazing speed and gold medal winning athletic ability. It was only when it became apparent that she won that medal either by accident, extreme pity, or because the person judging the race was best friends with Kenny Cox, that she became an underdog.
Here comes the audition tapes! Ace is a prat in his, standing on a beach wearing a suit with his fake accent in full force. He says "education was incumbent upon" him, but work has "distinguished" him. Yes, he's a very distinguished jewelry salesman. That bar fight has probably done more to distinguish him than anything else at this point. Also, how was education "incumbent upon" him? His bio says he went to some prestigious prep school in England (as prestigious as a school to a department store can be... ), but there's no mention of college. Nothing against people who choose not to go to college, but a high school diploma, no matter how prestigious the school is, isn't exactly the watermark of an educated man. Nor is saying in your bio that you are "highly more educated" than everyone else. Prat.
GC shadowboxes in his audition tape and claims that he will bring entertainment to this show, which he did not.
And then there's Randy: "I've only loved one person in my life, and that was my dog. He's in this urn right here. Dogs rule, people suck." You won't be surprised to hear that the video is being shot on a tripod, as in, there's no friend holding the camera up or anything like that. Also, Randy appears to be in the middle of a candlelight dinner in front of the fireplace for just him and his dog's urn. I've gone from hating him back to feeling sorry for him again. But wait! Randy's head is totally shaved in the video, no doubt because he's a skinhead, and I hate him again. And then his phone rings. Who could possibly be calling?
Bob went to his workplace for his audition video, so he's rocking his best Bill Nye costume of a bright blue suit jacket and a red bowtie as he stands in front of his physics class. You can see in the faces of the kids behind him that they are thrilled that they're sitting around watching their teacher be goofy instead of learning stuff. Then he's outside being chased by a bear. I did like how Bob totally swore when the bear started chasing him. He doesn't seem like the swearing type. Then Bob is in his high school cafeteria saying that he's ready to eat disgusting Suvivor food thanks to all the crappy lunches the lunch ladies have served him over the years. That was hands down for a slap, so he gets one from one of the lunch ladies. Obviously she works harder perfecting her backhand than her recipes.
Crystal went to an open casting call. She starts off by saying we probably recognize her as the gold medal winner from the 2004 Olympics, which we wouldn't since no one really memorizes the faces of 4x400 relay teams and also, Crystal wasn't in the 2004 Olympics. Or any Olympics.
Susie's live from her kitchen. She says she's 47 years old and poor, but she's confident and fun and can grow facial hair. I probably didn't need to know that. The people who've been watching this on their HDTVs, on the other hand, probably knew that already. Then her microwave timer goes off and she gets up to turn it off, saying "please call me, Mr. Burnett! I really am ready." Hee hee. I like Susie.
Ken is in his bedroom (where he probably spends most of his time) and he has braces. Wow. Unfortunate. He shows off the giant checks he's won in past videogame competitions (why not cash them already? Doesn't he need the money?) and says his strength is his strategic mind.
Corinne wants us to know she's really smart, so she says she went to college on a full academic scholarship and graduated in three years with "highest honors." People who need to talk about how smart they are all the time are usually insecure and stupid. See also: Ace. She says her strategy is flirtation and manipulation. And in the game itself, she implemented neither of those things. Way to go, bitch. And then she's in her bikini in an attempt to flirt with the casting department, most of whom are women. She jumps in the pool to show us that she's a risk-taker. Jumping into the deep end of a pool is only a risk if you don't know how to swim.
Sugar has a nose ring. She also has a car with a vanity plate, but claims to be jobless, homeless, and dadless. She wants to grow up on this show and eat gross stuff. Then a friend comes over to visit her in her car and she has to go. If she doesn't get the million then I hope she wins the car challenge so she can get a new home. This is the one time that the ugly failed Pontiac Aztec would have been a welcome prize.
Here comes Matty! Even though we all know he was recruited to be on this show, he apparently also had to make an audition video to seem legit. He says he was meant to be on this show, even though, again, he didn't audition in the first place. He has a cute little pug and a girlfriend, and something called a "hard core foolosophy." I'm not sure if he said philosophy wrong or he has a foolosophy. He says he wants pain and suffering, which is exactly what he got on Fang and he couldn't stop whining about it.
And that's it for the audition videos. I would have liked to see more. Lame. Now it's time for yet ANOTHER recap of the show so far. Our eighteen contestants arrive and Kota beats Fang in the first challenge "by a landslide." We also learned that Crystal can't run despite winning a gold medal for running. But Probst didn't see fit to mention that. Anyway, Kota is the land of sunshine and smiles, and everyone got along and loved each other. And then, in a "new scene" at Fang, they're apparently already starving, even though they had plenty of rice and all Kota really got that they didn't was corn and beans. Crystal tells us that they found a fruit they called a "Gabon pear." It looks gross and apparently tastes grosser. "It's rather nasty," Crystal deadpans. I love her. Ken eats a termite. GC finds a grasshopper and offers to share it. Crystal eats it and says it was gross. What are they, like, two days in at that point? That's way to early to be hungry enough to eat bugs.
"Anything at Fang that could go wrong, did go wrong," Probst says. And then, in another "new scene," Randy has a leech on his leg. Yes, it's all Fang's fault that their lake happens to have leeches in it. I'm sure Kota's lake didn't have any leeches at all because the leeches knew that Marcus was awesome and didn't want to suck any of his golden blood. Randy is annoyed at his teammate's concern over the bloody spot on his leg. Susie is not worried about Randy, though. In fact, she just says she's glad he got the leech and not her. Matty goes into the water, not worried about the risk of a leech attack. Matty tells us that Randy was "attacked by leeches." It was one leech. Please. He says he hasn't seen one leech on himself so far, and he's been in the water plenty. He thinks that's funny until he gets out of the water and there's a leech on his ankle. Ha! Matty also has to check his man parts to make sure leeches didn't get there, either. Randy recommended this, and if he knows something from experience, I'd rather not know. Then again, Randy must have been glad to see something sucking down there after his twenty-plus-year dry spell. Matty calls his leech a scumbag.
Over at Kota, Marcus, Corinne, Charlie, and Jacquie were "running the show," thanks to getting Bob in their "back pocket." Corinne gently and patiently explains the alliance to Bob. Probst: "and when Kota won yet another challenge" (that would be, like, the third challenge of the entire series so far -- hardly "yet another" territory), they sent Dan to Exile "Island," where you must choose between searching for the hidden idol or hanging out in a hut with food and a hammock. Dan chose the search, but totally sucked out and found nothing. Back at Kamp Kota, Probst wants us to think that Marcus and Jacquie had a romance developing. Of course, this does not compute for Corinne, who can't understand how people can want to be in each other's company. She also thinks that Marcus and Jacquie continuing to go off by themselves is making them a target, which could spell danger for her alliance. She tells Marcus to stop hanging out with Jacquie so much. "It's bad business," Corinne says. Good business, according to Corinne? Threatening to kill people whose votes you need.
"Fang finally won a reward challenge," Probst starts. Yes, finally! In the second episode of the season! WOW! Sugar is sent to Exile "Island." Of course, Corinne, in a "new scene," has her doubts that Sugar will be able to find the idol, and loudly announces them to all within earshot. "She's a pin-up, her name's Sugar," Corinne says, apparently having the ability to read the text that comes up on the screen when Sugar is giving an interview. She then tells us that Sugar is probably doing as badly on Exile as anyone has ever done before. Ha ha ha, the editors hate Corinne, huh? We cut immediately to Sugar finding the idol and, according to Probst, becoming the most powerful player in the game. Oh, you mean like Ozzy was? And then he got his ass blindsided? Statistically, I believe the hidden idol does more harm than good.
Baby hippo! So cute! Why couldn't we have gotten extra never before seen footage of the animals? I guess they didn't get any extra footage, seeing as how they've recycled almost all of their animal footage at this point. Sugar tells Ace that she found the idol, and Ace tells us that their game is now all set. Back at Fang, Probst claims they were almost out of rice. Except not really, since the rice lasted another twenty or so days after that. Randy pisses everyone off by daring to suggest they ration their food. In a "new scene," Matty tries to ease the tension around camp by making everyone sing a song for his girlfriend. Apparently, today is her birthday and now everyone must suffer and sing "For She's a Jolly Good Woman," set to the tune of "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow." This will shock no one, but GC quits before the song even starts. Randy appears to make an effort to join the chorus, but then realizes that Jamie is Matty's girlfriend and not his dog and stops.
Then, in another "new scene" that was obviously shot after the second tribe switch (and you can see it on the CBS site, so it's not really a new scene at all. I suspect this is the case for most of the "new scenes" in this episode), Matty says he's anxiety-ridden. Randy asks him if he's had tragedy in his life, which is really just a way to get Matty to ask him about his own personal tragedies. Randy says his biggest tragedy is "everything." He then goes onto to tell us that his biggest tragedy is losing his dog five years ago. Not to downplay the love of an owner for his pet, but ... come on. Remember Jolanda from Survivor: Palau? She was voted off first, so you might not. Anyway, her life was a mess of tragedy. Her father killed himself when she was in the room, various uncles also committed suicide, her aunt and brother were murdered, she didn't have electricity growing up, she was in an abusive relationship, all kinds of bad stuff. Compared to her, Randy's pain is nothing. "If you don't get me, you go crying home to momma," Randy says. That, or you construct an elaborate plan to kick Randy's ass out of the game in the most humiliating, if not strategic, way possible.
Probst continues that Matty, Susie, Randy, and Dan formed an alliance. And then, because Fang sucks, the tribes were immediately switched. Probst then goes on to lie that Fang "blew it" when it came to picking their new tribe with Ken's "odd choice" of Kelly over Bob and Sugar. Yes, an odd choice that may have won Ken the entire game. Shut up, Probst. Sugar is sent to Exile until the tribal council, where she opens up the Sugar Shack.
And there's the third shot of the mother and baby elephant (so cute!) in this episode alone. We go to Kota, where Randy tries to keep his abrasive personality under wraps by telling everyone "I will do my best despite hating each and every one of you." They all think he's kidding. We know he isn't. Randy then helped his new tribe to another immunity challenge win.
Over at Fang, it was time to decide who from the old Kota tribe would be going home. Matty rallied for Kelly, but Crystal didn't like that plan, pointing out that they were getting Sugar on their tribe , and she could have the immunity idol. Thus, Crystal is the only person who thought Sugar was capable of finding the hidden immunity idol. That night, Kelly stayed and Jacquie went home. Sugar arrived at her new camp to see that Jacquie was voted out. She tried to conceal her disappointment by saying "that sucks." The Kota tribe did no better at hiding their feelings upon seeing Jacquie out, with Corinne loudly gasping and putting her hand on her forehead and both her and Marcus admitting to being surprised to see her gone.
Oh well! Now it's time for a "new scene" featuring Bob and his master craftsmanship. He makes benches! He makes slingshots for bird hunting that can double as fishing spear launchers! Bob says they're in the middle of the jungle, which is his "forte." He has a lot of experience coming from the wild jungles of Maine, I'm sure. Marcus criticizes Bob's fishing spear for being too bottom-heavy while he sits on the bench Bob made and contributes nothing to the tribe himself. Bob shows off a sundial he made that doesn't actually tell time. Corinne: "having Bob around is definitely an asset, but I am NOT looking to take him to the end." I hope he outlasts her.
Back at Fang, we get another look at Crystal and GC's War of the Rices. Probst claims that Crystal's nerves were frayed, but she seemed perfectly calm and rational there. GC needs to go back on his grind and his tribemates are happy to grant his wish. Crystal, GC's fellow gang member (according to Randy) leads the charge to boot GC. And we have already spent way too much time on GC. Why not see some more of Michelle or Gillian? At least they didn't want to leave the game.
Since Crystal was the only person who thought Sugar was capable of finding the hidden idol, she searched Sugar's bag and found it inside. Now everyone at Fang knows she has it. Fang continued to lose, although Probst is quick to say that Matty did his very alpha male best to keep them alive in challenges while his teammates failed him. After a tough reward loss, Crystal started crying and Randy made fun of her. I hate him now, but that "wah wah wah" is still a little bit funny. Not as funny as Crystal's retort when she voted his ass out, but funny.
Kelly gets voted out, and then there's the breakable ball challenge. Probst claims that Sugar "dropped the ball," although the clip they show has the ball being thrown into a wood post and shattering before Sugar gets anywhere near it, so whatever, and went back to Exile "Island" for a record fifth time. Kota's reward is a picnic, which they heartily enjoyed. Oh, wait -- not all of them enjoyed it. Corinne tells us that the picnic was "very involved" with some sophisticated ingredients such as gherkins and pate. Some of her tribe mates didn't know what those things were, and for that, they earn Corinne's undying hatred. It doesn't take much. Then there's all this discussion about divvying everything up so everyone gets his or her fair share, which also pisses Corinne off. It shouldn't, since she benefits more than anyone else from the equal shares. She's a woman and the smallest and skinniest person there, so therefore she needs less calories than everyone else and burns them slower. If they really want to make it fair, she should get less food than everyone else. "Unfortunately, you get these great experiences. But you have to share them with people you can't stand. I'd rather be serving up poison to these people." That brings the total number of people Corinne has expressed interest in killing up to an impressive 8.
Let's check in on Sugar at Exile "Island" in a "new scene." She makes a dress out of her burlap bag, which is interesting since I read in some interviews with bitter bootees that she used other people's bags to make her clothes. It looks to me like the only person's bag she used was her own. Bitter liars. Sugar slept, picked berries, and sunbathed topless. Then she cried a lot. Probst can't believe it, but Sugar actually felt guilty that she got food and her tribemates didn't. Sugar also learned a valuable lesson about how powerful a person she really was. Yes, there is much inner strength to be gained in topless sunbathing.
Then we go to the first individual immunity challenge, which Marcus won. He gave a second immunity necklace to Sugar, making her super-immune from being voted out. That night, both tribes were forced to vote a member out. Ken was able to use his mind gaming skillz to convince Sugar to get rid of Ace before he got rid of her. "Sugar bought the lie," Probst says, although I'm still not exactly sure that Ken was lying. Everything he told Sugar about Ace thinking he had her wrapped around his finger and planning to blindside her ended up being true. But I don't know if Ken knew that or not at the time. Anyway, Ace goes home that night. Ha ha ha! Dan was voted out of Kota, but no one really says much about that.
Both tribes were brought to a beach for what they assumed was a merge feast. Ken found that immunity idol clue, but Charlie saw it, too, and insisted that everyone at the table read it. He then threw it to the side of the table all of his Kota tribe mates were seated at. With the idol made public, no one wanted to look aggressive and take it for himself. So "the unthinkable" happened, and Marcus and Randy threw the idol into the ocean. Marcus then bragged to us that he got everyone to throw away an immunity idol, and they are all really stupid. But then -- oops! -- there was no merge. It was another tribe switch. And now Marcus and Bob were on Kota with Susie, Crystal, and Ken.
Back at the new Fang, Matty told Sugar about Ken's deception, thereby causing the crucial swing vote to no longer trust Crystal or Ken. Nice one, Matty. At the immunity challenge, Probst is happy to tell us that Matty single-handedly won a "heroic" victory for Fang.
Over at Kota, Marcus told Crystal he wanted to vote Ken out . But Crystal had no intention of getting rid of her number one ally. While Marcus told Susie about the plan to vote Ken out, Crystal told Ken the same thing. Susie was now the swing vote, and Crystal used the information Marcus gave her about how everyone hated Susie to convince her to join their alliance and vote Marcus out. It worked, and Marcus was out of the game.
At the challenge, Corinne spoke up about how wrong it was that Marcus was voted out and how he deserved to stay in the game longer. Disgusted, Ken asked her who she thought deserved to leave. Meanwhile, Matty just grinned away. Corinne shows her even truer colors by telling us that seeing Marcus leave was "heartbreaking" because it ruins her chances of winning this game. You see, people only "deserve" to stay or leave this game depending on how useful they are to Corinne. Fang then won the reward challenge and sent Bob to Exile "Island" while they went to a local village. No doubt Corinne hated every minute of it and wanted to kill her entire tribe and everyone who has ever lived in Gabon.
On Exile, Bob couldn't find the hidden idol because it wasn't there. So he made his own very convincing fake one. I want to see the "new scene" where we see the arts and crafts store Bob got all his fake idol supplies from.
With the immunity challenge came the merge and Susie's awesome victory. Both alliances quickly realized that they needed Sugar's vote, and Corinne and Charlie did their best to charm her back onto their side. Over at the Fang alliance, Ken decided that Charlie should go first and his alliance agreed. Ken then went about trying to convince Sugar to vote with them. Even though Sugar wanted Randy to go more than anything else, she went with Ken's plan, and the Kota/Onion alliance was officially done and the Fang Failures were on top.
Funnily enough, that put Corinne, Bob, and Randy in the minority. Randy hates minorities, so this was hard for him. But it was even tougher for Corinne, as she was horrified to find herself stuck in another conversation with Sugar, who informed her that she didn't like the way Corinne always "talked negative," and thought maybe Corinne could work on that in order to be a better person. Corinne's facial expression here is hilarious. "I was letting you know that I hate the way you've been," Sugar says with a giggle; "but I know that you're not a bad person. You just got a little out of hand." Meanwhile, remember how Corinne thought that her fake nice act was enough to convince "stupid" Sugar to vote with her? Yeah ... no. Anyway, Corinne is furious that some stupid pin-up model is teaching her a life lesson. Sugar continues, saying that she and Corinne had just one nice conversation. The rest of the time Corinne was off with Randy talking shit about everyone. "It's a negative way of being and it was happening so much, it was just like, 'oh my god, it's like cancer in my ears.'" Corinne's response: >:-[ Sugar keeps going, saying that Corinne should just keep in mind that "everything that you say is noted." It looks to me like Sugar was being nice and maybe honestly trying to help Corinne, but Corinne won't be learning anything about herself today (or ever). She tells us that Sugar is a "non-college graduate waitress who is out of work -- she doesn't even have a waitress job! She lives off the 'kindness of others.' I don't like people that live off the kindness of others. There is no honor in that." I don't think there's much honor in putting people down for not going to college either. Nor do I think Corinne will ever have to worry about living off the kindness of others herself, as there's no way anyone would be that kind to her. Tellingly enough, though, they are that kind to Sugar. If I were Corinne, I'd be thinking that Sugar knows something about catching more flies with honey than vinegar.
Corinne goes off to find the only person who will understand the pain of being told to be nicer person: Randy. "I want to kill Sugar. I HATE her!" she cries. So, just after Sugar told Corinne that she couldn't stand it when Corinne went off with Randy to talk shit about people, what does Corinne do? She goes off with Randy to talk shit about people. Corinne claims that she was forced to put on her nice face and graciously accept Sugar's advice and say Sugar was the only friend she had left in this game, when inside she was cringing and thinking that Sugar is a bitch. "She's the worst person in the world," Randy says. "She's so stupid," Corinne says. And yet, not so stupid that she didn't see right through you, Corinne. Corinne says the only thing that gets her through the day is rehearsing the venomous speech she's going to give when she gets voted out. She could be spending that time, like, strategizing, but no. And I bet you money that Corinne doesn't say anything when she gets voted out. Full of shit. Corinne says that from now on, she's going to make sure that the jury will never vote for Sugar in the end. I thought they weren't supposed to conspire? "This is how the lesson goes, bitch," Corinne concludes. She's pretty superior for someone who got beat by a stupid non-college graduate with no honor. Remember, Corinne not only graduated college in three years, but she also has the highest honors.
Then, Probst explains, Bob showed Sugar "his only asset." Ew. Oh, he meant the fake idol. And that's that.
We head over to last week's auction. Ken sends Bob back to Exile, and Randy attempts to "soften his image" by buying a plate of cookies for the rest of the tribe. It didn't work on Sugar, though, who refused his first cookie offer, only to accept his second one (which was Randy's cookie) and hand it to Matty. It then became the biggest deal ever back at camp. Randy was furious, and thought up his ridiculous plan to treat everyone like crap so they'd vote him out and hope that Bob found the idol at Exile and was willing to give it to him. Randy then made people miserable by saying that Susie yawns loudly. Matty urged Randy to be nice, but Randy just called him a whore for joining the Fang alliance.
Matty tells us that Randy is definitely going home , but now everyone's afraid he's going to burn the camp down or dump out their food. We then see a scene where Randy goes swimming and the rest of the contestants worry that he's going to burn the camp down or dump out the food. Ken decides to actually do something about it and hides some of the food. Sugar says that Randy is crazy. Not to bag on Sugar, but, isn't she now doing the thing that she told Corinne not to do? Sitting around talking shit about people?
Randy lost the immunity challenge, making Bob's idol his only chance to stay in the game. That's when Sugar cooked up her plan for Bob to give Randy his fake idol. Randy thought it was real, and was thrilled to stay for three more days. Sugar was thrilled, too. I think the other contestants owe her and Bob a big thank you, because if Randy hadn't gotten that fake idol, he totally would have burned the camp down and possibly killed the contestants in their sleep.
At Tribal, Randy "smugly" handed Probst the idol, only to be shocked that it wasn't real. Sugar exploded in giggles and Randy went home. And that's it! Hope you enjoyed this little trip down memory lane. I didn't learn very much at all, except that Corinne is an even worse person than I thought she was and the editors hate her, too.
Look back at how we ranked the contestants when they started this season.
You can read more from Sara Morrison at L.A.me, which she occasionally updates when she has something to complain about. Or you can email her at saramorrison@gmail.com, although after hearing that Susie grows facial hair, she's not too keen on getting an HDTV after all.