Jonathan is scrambling to remain alive after dodging the boot last time, so obviously, his choice would be for his team to stop losing. In the reward challenge, however, great big Raro loses a feast to little Aitu as a result of a whole lot of collective sucking, including by such self-important types as Jenny and Adam. Candice takes her second trip to Exile Island, and she's feeling the fact that even if she gets to the end, she's going to have a serious jury problem. Aitu's feast only makes them love each other more, and is maybe the cutest reward ever on the show. Are you really surprised to learn that Ozzy can click his heels and Yul is easily embarrassed? The immunity challenge requires swimming and diving again, and Raro sucks again, and Aitu wins again. Nate kind of wants to boot Jonathan, but the tribe has decided that Rebecca is a liability in challenges, so they send her packing. And then...they discover at tribal council that they have to boot a second person. The Candice/Adam/Parvati block being solid, Nate being worth more at challenges, and Jonathan being a good catcher of fish they're not quite ready to cut loose yet, Jenny finds herself on the outs, and to her surprise, she's out. So, indeed, this has suddenly evolved into an almost entirely white tribe made up of mostly assholes taking on an almost entirely non-white tribe made up of mostly likable people who are good in challenges. This can only end well.
Previously on Impatient Return To Boyfriend Dooms Woman To Exile: Raro was nervous about Brad's loyalty after Brad said that, in the end, it would be an individual game. As we've all learned, that is something that only gauche people admit. This is the time in the game when we pretend that everyone can win as a team. In other news, Nate's obnoxiousness grew by leaps and bounds, in keeping with the apparent size of his head. Candice and Jonathan schemed over at Aitu to reunite with the rest of the white people once a merge happened. (That's...what happened, and it's kind of how Jonathan said it, so what do you want?) Before the reward challenge, Jeff offered everyone the chance to jump tribes, and Candice was like, "Eeeee! Okay!" Because she couldn't wait a few days for the merge, and she needed Adam's meaty presence right this minute, apparently. Jonathan followed Candice, apparently in large part because he didn't know what else to do. So from there, Great Big Raro went up against Tiny Tiny Aitu, now composed of Yul, Becky, Ozzy, and Sundra. Tiny Tiny Aitu promptly kicked Raro's fanny and enjoyed a food and family reward, not to mention the opportunity to send Candice to exile -- maybe the most satisfying use of exile of all time. All of a sudden, Tiny Tiny Aitu was like Angus, and Great Big Raro was like Dawson Leery. Nobody at Raro really liked Jonathan, and after Candice went out of her way to start some shit, it looked like he might not last long at his new tribe. But when Raro lost again at the immunity challenge, it was Brad, the non-swimming "nancy boy," who bore the brunt of Raro's righteous anger and was voted off. It was also announced that Brad was the first member of the jury, so that's...extra-early for that development, obviously. Oh, and Joe R filled in like a champ. Who will be voted out tonight?
We hit the beach at Raro on Day 22, where Jonathan is climbing up a tree to fetch coconuts. "Who knew a Jew could climb a tree?," Jonathan asks, providing the title to what will undoubtedly wind up as a wonderful children's song about understanding throughout the world's religions. "Who knew a Jew could climb a tree/ Who knew a Catholic could plant a flower?" It almost writes itself, really. My favorite part is that Jonathan continues by saying, "...and get coconuts. And pandanus nuts, and tropus [or something] shells, and scallops and clams, alone in the wilderness." If he's climbing a tree and getting clams, I think that's remarkable whether Jonathan's a Jew or not, quite frankly. I think those clams would be mighty surprised to see him, as they would almost surely think they had found their way to safety. Jonathan calls himself "a wandering Jew without a tribe." Of course, he could have avoided this by not abandoning his old tribe, but I suppose that's a lot to ask him to remember all at once, while he's up in the trees catching fish. He tells us that it's "a mutineer's life," and as long as said mutineer's life is getting him lots of camera time, I'm sure he's entirely happy with it. He admits in an interview that he sort of regrets the "impulsive" decision to jump tribes after Candice. One would think.
And now, Candice and Adam go for a walk to have what is sure to be quite a meeting of the minds. They talk about how much they trust each other. Adam promises her that the two of them will go the end, and then he actually winks and makes the mouth noise, apparently without irony. She tells us that Adam is "a very straightforward person" (boo, guys with layers!), and that she feels lucky to have him. Adorable! It's like watching a washcloth fall in love with a sofa cushion. It's uncomplicated, and I don't think either of them will get hurt. Adam tells Candice that the only problem with their plan to last till the end together is Jenny, who may be suspicious that that's what they're planning to do. He makes it clear that he thinks they need to pay attention to managing Jenny's expectations sooner rather than later. Indeed, Parvati and Jenny are, at this moment, having a chat in which Parvati tries to write off all of Adam and Candice's talking as lovey-dovey, baby-making stuff, calling them "the All-American couple." Jenny is uneasy, and not just in the stomach, the way I am. She interviews that it's supposed to be a group of five -- Nate, Rebecca, Adam, Parvati, and her. No Candice! Ever! She says that they need to make sure Adam doesn't "falter." Inside the shelter, Adam and Candice are lying around holding hands, sort of. He asks her about something on her finger and whether it hurts, and kisses it. She then points out another one that also hurts, so he kisses that too. And another one. And then she's like, "I cut my lip right here!" and he's all, "Didja? Didja?" It's the kind of thing that can be cute, but...not with these people, where even though you intellectually know it's flirting, some part of you believes that it's all very literal, and it's a coincidence that they end up kissing. But in the end, they have a very quick and not very impressive smooch. That's it? Man, that was hardly worth the trouble Candice went to for it.
Credits. Oh, separation based on race. You are so whimsical.
Back from commercials, we are at Aitu on Day 22, where Ozzy is out in the water, fishing. He tells us that his little tribe is still "deep inside of a hole," because they're down by three people, which is a lot. He says that they're "being tested in a way that few Survivors have been able to come out of," but he also says that it's great to be the underdog, and that he doesn't mind it at all. Sundra brings treemail back to the entire group, and it suggests that they're supposed to learn the semaphore alphabet, which is laid out on a board. The team members quiz each other in both directions -- figure out the letter from the description of the flag, and figure out which flag is used when you're given a letter. And then Yul gives this incredibly awesome quote: "For us, we don't have any strategic options, other than to win." Man, that rules. Love him! It's the kind of thing other people sometimes say, but they wind up saying it like this: "For us, we aren't seeing so many in the strategical optimists, except immersing victorious." I appreciate a good line delivered cleanly. The members of Aitu all stand in a little foursome for an Underdog Prayer of sorts. Yul says that they have to work together, because otherwise, they're "screwed." Good point, that.
We move to a challenge beach with sunburst-type markers on the sand. Aitu comes in, then Raro, and it is revealed that Brad was sent home. "Ohhhh," Yul moans unhappily. I seriously think that Yul is sad any time anyone goes home. I think he's stopped saying "integrity" because he now realizes how naïve it is, but you still can see that he's all, "Oh, Brad." Jeff also tells Aitu what Raro found out last night -- that Brad is on the jury. Ozzy makes a surprised face. "Whoa," says Yul. Now, Jeff explains the challenge. Two people with a compass and a coordinate will head out to the sunburst, which has lines going out at each point, but not necessarily in the logical "North is up" arrangement that people would expect based on elementary school, which is why you have to use the compass to figure out what's what. Once they orient themselves, they have to dig at the end of the correct pointer to find a chest buried in the sand. Pull it out, take it back, and it will have on it the coordinate for the other two people playing for your tribe. When you have all four chests, you untie them all and take out seven tiles showing nautical flags. Use those flags to spell "victory." First tribe finished wins a reward. And what's the reward? A plane trip to a nearby island for a local feast. Also, the chance to send someone to Exile Island.
Raro has to sit out three people, so they pick Rebecca, Nate, and Parvati. Raro is given a first coordinate of North Northwest. Aitu is given a first coordinate of East Northeast. Go! It's Jonathan and Jenny versus Sundra and Yul. Jonathan starts digging at North Northeast, and Candice corrects him that it's North Northwest. Jonathan corrects her back. She corrects him back-back. Jeff notes that they're fucked up already, which is true, and kind of depressing for them. Even more depressing, it appears as though neither Jenny nor Adam was paying enough attention to contribute anything, which means that the team overall has trouble reaching a consensus about a two-word instruction they just received. Jonathan apparently gives in, and he and Jenny switch to North Northwest. Yul and Sundra, however, have found their first chest already. Jenny is basically doing nothing to help Jonathan dig, and Candice and Adam are irritated. They're throwing themselves into the "you're ruining it for our awesome team" routine, which puts great pressure on them to be awesome once it gets to that point. Yul and Sundra pull on their chest, and up it comes from the sand. We're in the lead! Er...I mean, they're in the lead.
Becky and Ozzy head out for a chest at North Northwest. Finally, Jonathan and Jenny get their chest out of the ground. East Southeast is the coordinate for Adam and Candice. Ozzy and Becky are pulling up the second chest. Adam and Candice immediately start eating their own karma when they can't even figure out where East Southeast is, even as Ozzy and Becky pull up the second chest for Aitu. Yul and Sundra are out again. They start digging, and Adam and Candice can't get the chest out of the ground. Yul and Sundra pull up Aitu's third chest, so when they get back, it's three to one. Ozzy and Becky run out for the last chest. Finally, Adam and Candice get the second chest for Raro, but when they get back, Jenny leaves too early, so she and Jonathan have to come back and tag the mat. Heh. Ozzy and Becky have the fourth chest located. "They're on their last chest," Candice says sadly. "We've only got two." Now that was a piece of editing that I think reflects on how the editing staff views Candice, because that was a very simple moment that really, really made her look dumb. Somebody doesn't like her, is what I think. Stepping right in his own incompetence, Adam complains to Candice that he doesn't understand why Jonathan and Jenny are struggling, despite the fact that it took him and Candice forever to dig up that second chest. Jonathan and Jenny are still digging for the third chest when Ozzy and Becky pull up Aitu's final one. Nate buries his head in Parvati's shoulder over on the sidelines. Oh, Nate. Her tiny bones won't help you now.
Now, Aitu works on untying their chests. Here's my favorite part: one chest apparently comes open fairly easily, leaving Sundra free. At that point, she immediately asks, "Okay, who's having trouble?" Becky says she is, so Sundra goes to help her. They are operating like a machine, dude, and they're incredibly well tuned right now. Jonathan and Jenny are digging, but barely, and Aitu is already lining up flags on the table. "Come on," Candice moans, "I'm going to go to exile." Oh, yes, I'd say so. Honestly, what did she expect when she bailed on an alliance? It's part of the game, but so is imposing consequences for things like that. Finally, Jonathan and Jenny get the third chest up and bring it back, so Adam and Candice head out for the last one, but it's awfully late for that. Aitu starts arranging flags. Jeff notes that Adam and Candice look like they're working "in slow motion over there," even now. You'd think that they would keep going, given that we've certainly seen teams flub the puzzle at the end plenty of times. But Aitu doesn't. Aitu finishes, and Sundra reads off the letters: "V-I-C-T-O-R-Y." And indeed, Jeff declares that they are the big winners. They all immediately collapse into one giant group hug. What I like about this team is that all of these individual relationships look really warm and nice. Ozzy is rubbing Becky's shoulders...it's not just the original Yul-Becky pair plus Sundra, you know? Yul looks over, wondering where Raro is, and is surprised to see that they don't even have the last chest up. It's fascinating to me that he was able to focus to the point where he didn't really know what kind of progress Raro was making. He is a really intense guy, in a way that he seems to be able to control, which is what makes it lethal and not just self-destructive, as it is for most "intense" people.
Jeff congratulates Aitu and tells them that the plane will be coming for them. But first! Time to send someone from Raro to Exile Island. Yul actually counts it off: "One, two, three," and then at least he and Ozzy say, "Candice." Heeee hee. "Is this from the same betrayal?" Jeff asks. "Betrayal, strategy...at this point, same thing," says Yul. Aitu has really figured out how to harness that anger and that underdog feeling and use it for fuel, which I think is why they continue to hold this particular grudge. They hold it partly because they're using it, so they don't want to give it up. So Candice is once again sent off on the boat, meaning that she came back for nookie, and now she's not even getting it. Poor girl. Jeff reminds the members of Aitu of the feast they are about to enjoy, and they go off to meet their plane. And just before the commercial, we watch in slow motion as Ozzy leaps into the air and clicks his heels together. It's not that you wouldn't think he could do that, because you would, but it's still a nice moment. He's kind of making his more assy behavior a distant memory at this point.
Back from commercials, we are on Exile Island for Candice's Lament. "Today, I did not want to be sent back to Exile Island," she says, probably not providing too much new information to anyone, since I don't think anyone "wants" to be sent there. In her interview, Candice is all weepy, but she says that "it'll be okay." She pulls up a sea cucumber to eat, and it does not look appetizing, considering that it looks like a rotten cucumber spewing fish guts. But she's not just hungry. She's wounded: "It's not fun to know that people that you like want to see you suffer." Oh, come on, sister! I hate it when the women get all weepy like this, starting out as bad-asses and then taking everything all personally. You screwed your team, lady. You did it for strategy, and that's fine, but now they're getting you back. It's a game, in case you haven't noticed, and you haven't exactly endeared yourself to anyone in it other than your meathead of a boyfriend. Candice insists that she can survive, and tries to chuckle at the thought that it will be "character-building." You know what would be character-building? Not hooking up with oily, lazy dudes.
In the Aitu plane, Ozzy and Sundra are holding hands, loving the view out the windows. Ozzy says that their tribe deserved the trip, because they're up against the odds and they keep trying their hardest and winning. Of course, as their disadvantage gets smaller, they're going to have to figure out something else. They land, and as they walk up a road, a man comes along dressed in plant matter, and he has quite a crowd of people behind him. He yells what is translated as "Greetings!" He follows with "Welcome to the children of Avaiki. The sound of the drums from the hill of Atiu [sic the captions; I don't know] to welcome your official party." He adds, "On my shoulder, I will honor you." Of course, the team does not have the benefit of captioning, so this could be either "on my shoulder, I will honor you" or "my wild pig will tear you to pieces," and they would have no idea which. Becky, in fact, talks about how the voice was so "commanding" that she was afraid they were in trouble. Hee. She says that they really had no choice but just to wait and see what would happen. What happens is that the members of little Aitu are hoisted onto litters and carried by the partygoers toward the feast. It's interesting -- the Aitu members all grin, but on top of that, Yul in particular seems a little embarrassed at being carted around, which I think I would be too. It's uncomfortable, that whole thing...people carrying you, you know? But he settles in. Energetic, harmonic singing follows Aitu as they ride along. By now, Yul is grinning broadly. You can kind of see during this sequence that there's a lot of mind photography going on -- they're all trying to soak it up, because they're very conscious that they will never see anything quite like this again. Ozzy tells us that they were given "a warrior's welcome," and he lays claim to the title of "warrior" because of the challenge, which: quit while you're ahead, kid. You dug some stuff up out of the sand.
There is joyful clapping, and Sundra is close to tears. The Aitu members are lowered to the ground, and everyone cheers for them. "I didn't know I would ever be a part of anything this beautiful in my life," Sundra says simply. She calls it "magnificent" that everyone was so welcoming. She also refers to her team as "the four orphans." Aw. Adorably, she rests her head in disbelief on Ozzy's shoulder.
And now, there is a dancing show and the invitation to eat. Becky reaches over and plants a kiss on the top of a kid's head as Yul talks about how great it was to see the islanders being so cool and friendly. He calls them "wonderful hosts." It sure looks that way. I've seen a honkload of sequences like this, and this one is by far my favorite. Yul tells us that the feast was fun, and that really, it's the first experience of being "carefree" that he's had since he got to the island. And this part, I completely believe, because Yul? I'm thinking he's not a party animal. YET. Sundra and Becky dance with the women, and Yul claps appreciatively from his seat on the ground, and for a minute, I think he's eye-flirting with someone -- maybe Sundra, but I'm probably just thinking wishfully, because I think they're both such lovely people.
Yul does not, however, want to dance, so a lady comes over and starts wiggling right in front of him. And then, she pushes him down and stands over him. And then, she lies on top of him. Okay, even I am more subtle than this, but...on some occasions, only slightly. The lady pulls Yul to his feet as Ozzy voices over that Yul is "complex" and "intellectual," which you can tell from all the wiggling, and that seeing him cut loose was very cool. Yul does manage to get his groove on with the nice lady, and then another lady comes over and they make a Yul sandwich, making them okay ladies by me. Finally, with everyone laughing, Yul slinks to the ground, where he curls up in a little ball so as not to die of blushing. That? Is hilarious and genuine, and is the kind of thing you can't fake at all. What I love is that the locals, too, are laughing hysterically, which makes it feel a lot less touristy and a lot more like this actually was a situation in which all these people managed to have fun together. Imagine! Ozzy points out that, at first, they were separated by ethnicity, and now it's this big thing where they can all get some new culture together. Leave it to Ozzy to blow the moment with a big declaration of meaning. "Raro doesn't know what's coming," Ozzy says as he gives smooches on the cheek to a couple of local cuties. I think they know what's coming. Hi-yo!
After the commercials, we are back at miserable old Raro on Day 23. They complain about the cold. They complain about the smell. But Jonathan isn't relaxing with the complainers. He's out in the water trying to catch food, and he's telling us in an interview that the rest of the tribe has apparently not noticed that its current strategy is causing it to suck major quantities of wind. He thinks that the tribe might just be "demoralized from losing." A known occupational hazard of losers, that. Jonathan insists that the reason they're losing is failure to work as a tribe, as opposed to, say, bad swimming, lame-ass digging, and a basic inability to remember the difference between "Northwest" and "Northeast." He says that his decision was to "give [his tribemates] an example of another way to be in the tribe, and that is, work your ass off all the time." Now, you'd think this was a relatively tame sequence, but you would be wrong, because Jonathan is hanging all the fish he catches from his crotch, which is really strange-looking. And that's the most generous way to put it, believe me. You can kind of imagine a guy having that dream, similar to Chandler in the first scene ever of Friends, dreaming that his hoo-ha turned into a phone and his mother called.
Speaking of which, a total tangent: do yourself a favor and listen to the first twenty minutes of this episode of This American Life. You can stream it right online, and I don't mind if you do it right now and then come back to the recap. You may have heard the story a million times, but I certainly hadn't, and I laughed until I couldn't breathe. And...end of tangent.
Jonathan gives the tribe all the fish, after first removing them from his crotch, and they're all very happy. (The tribe, not the fish.) (Well, probably the fish also.) (Okay, I just grossed myself right out.) This bit about Jonathan and food looks like it could be one of the few situations in which you actually can help yourself by being good around camp, because while they'll cut him loose eventually, the other Raro members do look to be nearly incompetent on their own, and everyone likes the occasional chance to eat, especially if they can't win any challenges. Adam looks like one of those guys who likes to pick fights with smaller guys but couldn't catch a chicken or a fish if his life depended on it, and Nate seems to be too busy trying out new old slang to get food, and I don't think any of the "girls" is going for it.
Nate and Adam bring some treemail to the tribe. Predictably, it tells them that there's a challenge coming and that they'll go to tribal council if they lose. It also gives them a map of many, many small islands, and it suggests that they should learn this map. Raro decides that Rebecca should learn the map. Jenny tells us that there haven't been any challenges so far in which Rebecca has done them any good. As opposed, I guess, to Jenny's own brilliant digging this morning, which was tremendously helpful. Parvati decides to help Rebecca to study the map. Jenny thinks Rebecca needs to "show a little more in challenges" if she wants to stick around.
We head to the challenge. Jeff calls in the tribes. He tells them that Candice is back from exile, and here she is indeed. She hugs everyone, especially Adam. Jeff asks about the fact that Candice has barely been with this tribe since she jumped, because she keeps getting sent to Exile Island. She says that she knows her tribe is with her out there. She doesn't mention sexual frustration, but seriously -- you put yourself in very bad shape with your former tribe for the sole apparent purpose of canoodling with your boyfriend, and instead, you wind up chewing on waterlogged sea cucumbers all by yourself? Come on! That's genius, people. Genius.
Jeff explains that each person in the challenge will swim out, one at a time, to a pontoon. Then, they'll dive down and retrieve a bag of island names that's clipped down underwater. When you get back, the person goes. So when you have all four bags, you move to an answer table, where you have to correctly match ten marked islands with their names. Losers will go to tribal council. Jeff also explains that the losers will take home a bottle with a note in it, but won't get to read the note until they're at tribal council. Somehow, given that the bottle is being sent home with the losers, I do not think the note will be good news.
In this challenge, Raro has to sit out three people again, so they sit Candice, Adam, and Jenny, meaning that Jonathan, Nate, Parvati, and Rebecca are competing. How did Rebecca wind up in an immunity challenge if they know she sucks so much? Couldn't they have used her at the reward challenge and gotten themselves into a position to leave her out of the much more important immunity challenge? There just seems to be a lot of strategic goofiness in the collective Raro "mind." If you want the best team to compete at immunity, you're not going to sit Candice and Adam. I mean, maybe they believe that the law of averages suggests there can't continue to be swimming challenges all the time, but I'd still think you wouldn't bet on Rebecca if you think she hasn't been good at a single challenge yet. Forget the feast and go for the part where you don't get your asses booted off.
Ready...go! The first two swimmers are Ozzy and Nate. What we immediately learn here is that Nate has really, really earned his reputation for being about nothing but gym strength, because he is not much for the swimming. Ozzy quickly gets to the pontoon, so he dives down and unclips the bag. He's on the way back already, and Raro is already behind. Nate doesn't get the bag on the first try, so...there's that. Nate finally gets the first bag and starts back, but he is still losing time, because he's not a good swimmer. Ozzy gets back to the start, so Yul goes . Yul has the bag for Aitu before Nate even gets back to the start, but he finally does, so Jonathan can go. Yul's return sends Becky out for Aitu, almost but not quite a whole round behind, solely because of Nate. Keep that in mind: Nate took almost twice as long as Yul or Ozzy. Jonathan does make up some time, in part by getting the bag quickly. He returns, sending Parvati out to chase Becky. Becky emerges with the bag, and then Parvati does, so Parvati is gaining on Becky. Becky does beat Parvati back, and then Sundra is tearing out into the water for the final bag for Aitu. While Parvati made up time on Becky, Rebecca is not going to make up time on Sundra. I notice that Rebecca is wearing a shirt over her swimsuit this week, perhaps to avoid another flying-breasts issue. It's a good idea, given how small the swimsuit she brought turned out to be, but I hate to see that, because it makes me think she's really self-conscious about it, which is too bad. Sundra surfaces without the bag the first time, so Rebecca actually gets to the pontoon while Sundra is still there. But then Sundra comes up with the last bag and starts back. It takes Rebecca a couple of tries to get her bag -- just like it did Nate -- so Raro is well behind again. Aitu is already solving its puzzle. Rebecca hauls in the last bag for Raro, so they can start solving. I'm really not sure Rebecca lost much more time for her team than Nate did, not that there will be much discussion of that. ["But let's also consider the decision to have Rebecca -- proven a terrible swimmer -- swim anchor in this challenge. I smell a set-up to trump up a reason to boot her this time." -- Wing Chun] But Raro has barely touched the puzzle when the members of Aitu announce that that they think they have it solved. Which they do. Aitu again.
Aitu has another incredibly warm hug. My favorite part is that Ozzy kisses Becky's head, then Sundra's head, and then he and Yul share a very studly cheek-kiss that kind of surprised me. That is a really well-bonded team -- maybe the most thoroughly bonded tribe I've ever seen, at least for now. It's funny, and I really hope this doesn't happen, but I am tempted to think that if they ultimately are Pagonged, the ex-Aitus will vote as a bloc at the final tribal council, and will come very close to controlling the outcome, considering that I think it's very likely that Brad would get together with them, since he's much more their kind of guy than Nate and Adam's kind of guy. Anyway, Raro looks very unhappy. Jeff hands Aitu the idol after yet another victory. Jeff gives Raro the famous bottle to take back to camp. Bring it to tribal council, he says, but don't open it before that. Jeff sends everybody home. Aitu's celebrating continues.
It is Day 24 at Raro, and they're debating what the little bottle is going to be. Candice thinks that it will now change to individual challenges, but that there won't be a merge. Adam, on the other hand, thinks it's going to say that they have to head for the other tribe's island tomorrow. Candice says that she has a "feeling of dread" about the note in the bottle. I really hope it says, "Candice, you have to go to Exile Island again, and instead of sea cucumbers, you have to eat rocks." Not because I wish her ill, but just because I think her reaction would be interesting. I think I just accidentally discovered one of the things I like about this show.
A chat follows among Adam, Candice, Jenny, and Jonathan in which Adam says that they're "leaning" toward voting off Rebecca on the basis that she doesn't help them in challenges. As I said: today, I'm not sure she was as big a liability compared to her apparent "counterparts" on the other tribe as Nate was. It kind of makes it funny to remember Nate gnashing his teeth in frustration because he couldn't help out at the swimming challenge where Brad was such a "nancy boy." Jenny similarly voices over that, based on challenges as well as "productivity around camp," they want to get rid of Rebecca, even though it means breaking up the gang of five. Of course, if anyone else broke up the gang of five, it would be a betrayal. Elsewhere, Adam tells Candice that it's good to be getting rid of Rebecca. He also says that, after that happens, Jenny is going to want to get rid of Jonathan and Candice. Adam claims, though, that Jenny is "by herself." In other words, it's the white people 4-Eva, plus (apparently) Nate. In an interview, Adam supposes that the person to go might just be Jenny.
Now, there is a weirdly disconnected conversation between Nate and Parvati, in which they discuss Nate's preference not to turn on Rebecca, but to dump Jonathan instead. Nate tells us that this remains true, because Jonathan isn't "family." Of course...oh, never mind. I don't want to burst Nate's bubble. We'll pretend everyone's family for now. The kind of family you have to do mean things to later, but...family, nevertheless. Jonathan tells us he thinks Rebecca will go , and that he thinks it's partly because he's worked so hard at getting food. I'm such a fan of saying that never works that I feel obligated to disagree with him, but I think these people are actually so lazy and ineffectual that they might indeed fear that, if he left, they would starve to death.
Discussion turns again to the meaning of the little bottle, and everyone in Raro seems to agree that, whatever it is, they don't think they're going to like it.
Tribal council. The members of Raro all arrange themselves on the various benches. Jeff brings in Brad, who looks nattily dressed for the jury, to the point where they all actually chuckle out loud because he's so pretty. Jeff informs Raro that, in case they haven't noticed, as a tribe, they have won a total of three challenges. I'm not going to count, but I believe that's three out of eleven since the original merge. Not very good. Jeff asks Jenny what she can do to improve their situation. Jenny says that she doesn't know -- she still thinks they have to look at "strengths and weaknesses." Jeff asks Rebecca about camp, and she says that they need to be "positive." She says that everyone works to get food, and Jonathan takes this opportunity to jump in and talk about all the fish he's caught. Jeff asks him how many, and when Jonathan says twenty-two, Jeff can't help being impressed. Jonathan hasn't even explained that they were all hanging from his crotch. Jeff asks Parvati whether, now that Jonathan is catching all these fish, he's seeming a little more like one of the...you know, "family." Parvati acknowledges that you can't entirely dislike a guy who's feeding you: "It's cool to have him around." I'll bet that's exactly what she would sign in his yearbook: "It was cool to have you around."
Jeff asks Adam about the divide between keeping people who are strong for the tribe and keeping people you trust. He points out that Candice and Jonathan, both of whom are clearly snakes for leaving their old tribe, are arguably strong members of the new tribe, so what do you do about that, huh? Adam allows his tiny brain to process this for a moment, and then says that he's "tired of losing," so "it's all about productivity," from his perspective. He bites his lip so that you know he's serious about how much he hates losing. Jeff inquires about the bottle, and whether they've kept it sealed like they were supposed to. Parvati has the bottle, and they have managed not to open it. Jeff says that nothing is happening with it yet, but that they'll open it after the vote.
Candice votes. Jenny votes for Rebecca, telling her that it's "overall productivity" at this point. Parvati votes. Jonathan votes. Rebecca votes for "Johnathan," saying that he got to the tribe too late. Adam votes. Nate votes. Jeff goes off to tally. When he returns, he reads the first vote, which is for "Johnathan." : Rebecca. Then Rebecca and Rebecca and Rebecca, and we're done. She's the second member of the jury. So Rebecca walks over and is snuffed, and this is the point where I look at the clock and realize that there's too much time left; whatever they're doing, they're doing it now, and that's how I realized what was going to happen. I was fifteen seconds ahead of Parvati, figuring-things-out-wise, so that makes me feel really good.
Jeff says that it's time to open the sealed bottle. He wants to know whether they agreed on what they thought the note was going to say. Parvati reports that they pretty much thought it had something to do with some sort of merge. Jeff tells her to open the bottle. She does, and the note reads: "You have just voted out one member of your tribe. You will now vote out another." And then she pauses. "That's not...fun," she protests weakly. Nate's mouth hangs open. "Definitely not a merge," Jeff snots. Brad looks around like, "Um, serves you right, GENIUSES." Nate calls it "wack." Actually, he calls it something longer than that, and I don't even understand it completely, so I'm not going to try to decipher it for you except to say that I suspect it is lame, just judging by what appear to be the statistics of Nate's attempt/lameness index. Nate's thought, he says, is how great it would have been to get the win today and get the other tribe down to two. Man, I sort of agree with Nate, only in the opposite direction. Can you imagine if that tiny Aitu tribe had to go through two agonizing boots in one night? Yipes. That would have been the saddest thing ever. Jeff points out that the merge could be either tomorrow or never. Or, presumably, somewhere in between.
Now, Jeff asks Adam what he's thinking. Adam says that Rebecca clearly sucked, but that there's no one else left who clearly sucks, so he's at a loss: "This is going to be much tougher." But there's no dawdling and no consulting, so Candice goes off to vote. Jenny votes. Nate votes. Parvati votes. Jonathan votes. Adam votes. Jeff goes off to tally. Vote-reading, take two! The first vote is for Jonathan. Then there's another for Jonathan. Ooh, they are tormenting her. Because now, it's Jenny. And Jenny. And Jenny. And Jenny. And the fourth vote for Jenny sends her home. Disbelieving, Jenny goes off to be snuffed. And it would certainly appear that, as she walks off, she throws her tribe some kind of gesture, which I'm guessing is not a lovely wave. When she's gone, Jeff points out that maybe now that they're down to five people (from the eight they had when Candice and Jonathan jumped), they'll get it together and stop acting like such nitwits. Approximately.
In her parting words, Jenny says that she's "completely pissed off" about being voted off. It turns out that Nate was the other person, besides Jenny, who voted for Jonathan. Jenny says that she respects Jonathan's "pulling his own weight," but that she felt "blindsided" by the second eviction, and feels like she didn't get a chance to save herself. There, I think she's actually pissed off at the show, figuring that pulling the second vote out of the air like that was somehow unfair. Which is pretty much what a person who just lost would be expected to say.
week: Jonathan is pissed off at everyone for not working enough, which is a good idea that always works well to motivate the lazy people. Yul lets Ozzy in on (presumably) the hidden idol business. Adam and Candice smooch more. Oh, good.