Previously on Survivor, Tambaqui "united," while the men of Jaburu "saved [Shawna] from the women." It would have been more appropriate, however, had they "saved [Shawna] from herself." Tambaqui successfully won the reward challenge, and HeiDDi and Roger both flailed, so that was fun to watch. Deena, meanwhile, needed some help. With her ego. Instead, Rob stepped in, and together they formed an alliance. Later, Tambaqui successfully won the week's immunity challenge, which consisted of gnawing on a giant, nasty shank of barbecued meat. This episode so should have been sponsored by Applebee's. A giant piece of beef dangled from HeiDDi's mouth in a completely unsexy way, but then I suppose I could add "in a completely unsexy way" after nearly everything HeiDDi does and be accurate. Finally, Jaburu headed off to Tribal Council, where Shawna's ejection left Alex bereft. And scabby, too, one might presume, since Shawna appeared to spend the bulk of her time picking at his scalp.
Wailing singers and a giant moon bring us to an empty fishing boat. It's Night 18, and we join the members of Jaburu as they return from the evening's Tribal Council. As they fumble around camp in night-vision, Deena voice-overs that the vote was awful, and that they miss Shawna's "spark" as well as "the extra little bandanna with the sunglasses." The tribe members discuss their hatred of Tribal Council, and Rob smirkily announces that he feels physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted. In an interview, he explains that Alex is depressed by Shawna's absence. This comment is accompanied by a shot of Alex obsessively rubbing his lips, which we're supposed to think represents his moroseness now that Shawna is gone. Rob admits that the game isn't the same without Shawna, but only because the tribe is lacking another twenty-three-year-old bikini-clad girl. Still, Rob thinks the situation might ultimately be a good thing for Alex because it might make Alex "get his head out of his ass and start thinkin' about the game like he should be."
The tribe gathers, and Rob proposes that they decide as a group to tell the male members of the other tribe that the men of Jaburu have maintained their original Tambaqui alliance. Jenna disproves the theories now floating around the boards of her well-camouflaged brilliance by whining that the men would then vote the women out. Rob dumbs it down to explain that they're not really going to maintain the Tambaqui alliance; they're just going to tell the others they are. Jenna scratches her head and wonders why these other people expect her to have to think when she's just so cute. As the conversation continues, Deena stands besides Jenna and makes sweet love to her own hair. Seriously: she swings it around, bends over and fluffs it, pulls at it, and even sniffs it at one point. Well, she's either sniffing it or kissing it, but the second possibility is too disturbing. Between Tribal Council and this discussion, Deena must have had a bath. And possibly a blow-out. Rob insists that they have to gain the votes of the women of the other tribe, and Jenna expresses confidence in HeiDDi, but not in Christy. Rob reinforces that HeiDDi would be good enough, while a gape-jawed Matthew mentally agrees that HeiDDi would be good enough. For dinner. Matt, apparently, likes the taste of silicone. Rob further explains that with HeiDDi's vote, they'll be able to divide the other tribe, avoid a 5-5 tie, and knock off Davey Rockett. He refers to the plan as "insurance," and adds, "It's kind of, uh, deceptive, though. It's only a suggestion."
In an interview, Rob complains that he doesn't like talking strategy in an "open forum," but that if there's a merger in the few days, he wants to be sure "these knuckleheads" understand the plan. And I'm not sure why, but hearing people called "knuckleheads" is really kind of funny to me. Jenna still doesn't look convinced by the plan, while Deena is still having sex with her hair. Alex says he's comfortable with the plan, and Deena adds that Davey Rockett is likely the strongest of the S10. She says she's worried, and Alex interrupts her to say, "that given the opportunity to win immunity, he'll take it." Of course he'll take the chance for immunity, and why wouldn't he be "given the opportunity"? Seriously, sometimes these people talk just to hear their own voices using fancy expressions like "that given the opportunity." Rob claims that if they get rid of Davey Rockett, Tambaqui will crumble. In an interview, he tells us that once Jaburu has the majority, he'll be all, "Roger, shut up! Shut up, Roger! Stop talking, Roger!" He goes on to say, "If I leave, the shoe will be on the other foot," which makes no sense to me, but that's not a big surprise. Back in the tribal conversation, Deena says that it will feel really good to break up Tambaqui, and Rob agrees that it would be the "highlight of [his] game." They could also be talking about the ejection of either Davey Rockett or Roger, but it's hard to tell because we reenter the conversation mid-way. A night-vision tarantula diabolically rubs its feelers together.
The sun rises, and a series of monkeys climb, swing, and leap from trees. I miss Magilla, because these are some mean-ass looking monkeys. Maybe that's what Magillas turn into Gremlins-style after long-term exposure to Survivor. Through Jenna breast-cam, we join the tribe on a hike, during which Rob repeats his AOL "Welcome. You have treemail" routine for the members of the tribe who have not yet been fortunate enough to hear it. Deena fawns, claiming that Rob's vastly improved the enjoyment of her Survivor experience. He responds, "I'll be here all week!" The treemail reveals a key, and the tribe members immediately start running and shrieking their way back to camp. The camera angles goes all Blair Witch as they take off through the woods. Soon, Matthew will make Rob stand in the corner facing the wall, while he offs the other members of the tribe. In an interview, Deena reminds us that the box has been in their supply chest since Day 1, and that it's driving them nuts not knowing what's in it. They've been shaking, dropping, and throwing the box to find out what's inside. When she says this, I get an instant visual of the scene from Zoolander when Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson go all 2001: A Space Odyssey on the iMac.
At Tambaqui, the locked box thuds onto the crate. In an interview, Butch tells us that they were excited about opening the box because they've been speculating for eighteen straight days over its contents. Finally, the box is open, and contains a piece of paper bearing a message. All that mystery for yet another challenge poem? Roger begins reading: "You started men and women, then mixed it up for fun. For those who survived nineteen days, it's time to live as one..."
We then join the other tribe, where Jenna -- shocking me by actually emoting, for once -- reads the conclusion of the clue: "Paddle to a new location, leave your old life behind. Take your water, machete, and personal pack, and a brand-new world you're about to find."
Rob is immediately bothered by the thought of building a new shelter, before Deena tells us in an interview that the note "clearly says" the two tribes will become one. In other words, Peachy had better not even think of using any of his tricky "I certainly didn't say anything to give you that impression, did I?" merge/non-merge crap on her. Deena speaks Legalese, and she'll sue his Peachy ass! She tells us that as soon as they got the instructions advising them to pack it up, they were off and packing. While Rob frantically stuffs a bag and sings about the merger, Jenna asks if anyone else feels nervous. Deena admits that she does, but insists that it's okay because they're "down with Jaburu." She reinforces the voting order: Davey Rockett, Roger, Butch. Alex adds, "Amen to that system!" In the background, Jenna is frantically "you guys"ing, but no one pays any attention to her. Rob warns the others not to be seen together, and they all agree before Deena chants, "All for one!" to which the others enthusiastically respond, "One for all!" and it's just a little too perfect, like it was at least the third take or something. Rob thanks Jenna for bringing them all together, and for having really nice breasts. Except without that last part. Except he was totally thinking it. Jenna responds, "Oh, no problem," as if it was something she could actually take credit for. The tribe members do a little hand-on-hand-on- hand-on-hand-on-hand cheer for themselves.
Tambaqui is also all packed up, and HeiDDi bids farewell to the camp. She feels bad that it won't have her cuteness to occupy it anymore. The tribe walks out in single file, typically leaving behind their trash. They all wave goodbye to the camp as Butch eulogizes, "It was a good time, neat place, good friendship. I'll never forget it, long as I live."
A bird soars. A lot of birds soar. Dramatic music plays as the tribes row alongside one another beside before colliding. Hee. Peachy coaches them to the shore of a tiny island before warning them to retrieve all their stuff, because they won't be returning to their boats. Peachy announces that they already know from their treemail that they'll be merging today. Oh, Peachy's wearing his pretty blue shirt! He further narrates that they started as two tribes of men and women, then "integrated" into joint tribes. HeiDDi sticks her tongue out at Peachy and wriggles it around. Technically, she's not sticking her tongue out at Peachy, but I don't know if that's better or worse than sticking it out for no reason at all. Today, Peachy announces, they'll form one tribe, and they'll stay with that tribe "for the rest of [their] days....in the Amazon." He pauses awkwardly after the "rest of [their] days" part, making it sound like they're going to die there. Peachy also explains that the game now switches to an individual competition -- all reward and immunity challenges will be solo efforts.
Peachy orders the contestants to remove their buffs, and reveals that their new tribe color is either red or orange. I can't quite tell on my crappy television, but let's go with red because it's a nicer color. Peachy announces that they'll have an entirely new home, and thus will have to craft a new shelter, come up with a new name, and paint a flag. He arms them with a map and boat, handing the map off to HeiDDi. As they head off, Butch immediately scoops up Deena's hand, telling her that he feels like he's known her since the first day of the game. Aw. Rob hugs Christy and introduces himself; Christy enthusiastically tells us in an interview that she's happy and surprised to have made the merge. She raises both hands in a hairy-armpitted expression of victory. Rob makes his way over to HeiDDi and gives her a big hug, while Jenna looks bored and politely pats Davey Rockett's back as they embrace. In an interview, Davey Rockett tells us that the "surge" of having reached this point in the game after battling each other for so long was terrific, because they've successfully accomplished something. The tribe paddles along past very tall trees growing in the middle of the water. Cool. A familiar croc slinks by.
The new tribe's boat crashes into shore, conveniently appearing in videotaped footage in case Deena wants to sue for whiplash later. Seriously, it looks like that end part of the log flume ride right before you're supposed to get off. We see a meal laid out on the ground, and Roger tells us in an interview that it was the "feast to end all feasts." The contestants run over, celebrating the chocolate, salsa, and Coors Light. There are also several baskets, which the tribe thinks must contain hamburgers, but it's yet another exquisite American meal: hot dogs! Gold-filled hot dogs, apparently, judging by the tribe's excitement. Various other bowls reveal slaw, potato salad, corn on the cob, and pickles, the last of which Butch seems particularly excited about. The pickles are flying, man! In an interview, Davey Rockett tells us that they're at a new point in the game with new people and "new friendships to be made." He cites a "flurry of excitement" during which no one was thinking about the game. Except all the women, but he doesn't know that yet. Instead, he tells us that they were just enjoying the meal and celebrating the merge. Davey Rockett passes around beer, and everyone toasts each other. Alex -- whose toasting hand is empty -- makes a series of frantic hand gestures that may or may not include a "thumbs up." I've read on the forums that this is some sort of AA gesture, but I've never seen it before -- not in any of the myriad made-for-television movies I've seen or by a Backstreet Boy, anyway.
Our old friend the crocodile slides into the water, and even he knows to keep a wary eye on Matthew. Rob tells the group that they need to take the experience slowly and enjoy it. Deena announces that she has a few ideas for the new tribe's name: Jacaré, which she reveals is Portuguese for "crocodile." No one wants to sit through her other smug suggestions, so they immediately agree on the aforementioned Jacaré (forever "Jackée" to me), causing Rob to declare, "A tribe is born!"
In the midst of the festivities, Roger gets up and walks away from the other members of the tribe, while Deena rolls her eyes at his back. HeiDDi announces that she doesn’t want to get up because she's "eatin' chips, man!" Roger voice-overs that the group's attitude was "Let's be festive all afternoon," and they forgot about building the shelter. The other members of the tribe slowly get to their feet, and Davey Rockett picks at his wedgie. If you have it on tape, go back and watch him. Maybe someone can work some "Hamster Dance"-inspired magic with this one? As the other men join Roger in working, the women stand around and watch. The men of Jackée seem most interested in preserving the beer, and offer up their ice-filled raincoats as a cooling system. Roger irritatedly points out that keeping the beer cold isn't a priority, before telling us in an interview that it ticked him off that the other men had invented a "special contraption" for keeping the beer on ice. A quick clip reveals a double-fisting Matt, who must keep his hands occupied at all times in order to avoid the instinct to start cutting people up on camera. Butch calmly tries to reason down Roger's irritation, but Roger's not having it and snits, "So it's warm! So it's warm!" Butch knows when to give up, and quietly concedes, "All right, Rog." In an interview, Alex says, "The problem with Roger is that...he's an ass." Hee. Alex calls Roger a loud, obnoxious, bossy, know-it-all, who is desperate to be the tribe's leader. Alex continues telling us that Roger wanted only his own priorities attended to, and constantly yelled at everyone.
Roger insists to the group that they need to assign duties. An awkward silence ensues as no one even attempts to respond, before Alex jumps in to point out that their current location is not far from the water, but that they're at an elevated point. He thinks it's only a small gamble to remain where they are. Deena voices her concern about that 150-feet "thing that you're supposed to be from the water's edge for the whole crocodile..." She motions toward the nearby swamp, and Alex agrees that they could move because of potential crocs, or risk staying where they are. Deena proposes that if they do remain in their current location, they should at least move the fire. Honestly, I don't think Deena has that big a problem with their location, but just wants her viewpoint acknowledged. Instead, Roger incredulously asks, "What? To keep the caiman away?" Alex handles the situation more skillfully by agreeing that they could move the fire, but that "it doesn't have to be a big blazer, and it doesn't have to go all the time." In other words, they won't have the fire there at all, but Deena at least feels like her opinion was heard. Roger reiterates that it isn't necessary to move the fire, and insists that the caiman won't bother them while Deena again cites her survival training. The other members of the tribe look perplexed by this argument, and I'm guessing it's because they know Roger's right but don't want to admit it because he's being so annoying about it. Rob laughs straight at the camera before telling us in an interview that there is a lot of tension between Deena and Roger. He says that Deena is a strong woman whom he respects, and that she's a lawyer and can argue her way out of any situation. Meanwhile, Roger just loves to talk. The interview is filmed, incidentally, from an unusual fisheye angle that does nothing to emphasize Rob's good physical features. Whatever those may be.
We rejoin the conversation, where they have evidently moved their camp, but not very far. Roger points out that they're as close to the water as they were before, and on only slightly higher ground. He doesn't think it helps them to move. As he bosses on, Deena makes aggressive "blah, blah, blah" faces at the camera. It's not attractive. Rob continues telling us in his interview that Roger thinks women are stupid, and that Deena thinks women are better then men; there are a million different conversation the two of them could have when put together. Roger argues that the caimans go into the water at night, and concludes that they will remain in their original location. Alex tries to wrap up the conversation -- while also taking a jab at Roger -- by saying that he wanted everyone to be part of the decision. Rob yells, "Yay!" because maybe they can go take another group bath now.
Now that the tribe has finally decided where to put the shelter, the log-hacking process begins. They barely survived their machetes the first time, so I see why the producers wanted them to have another go at it: twice the possibility of someone's losing an appendage. Alex and Roger try to decide how to construct the roof, while Deena silently stews nearby. In an interview, she says it's like the song "It's Raining Men," but based on what she says, it's not really like the song at all. She imitates Roger: "Okay. Here. We're gonna establish our floor and our base and our perimeter and you two...you two, go get....palm fronds!" During this interview, we see a shot of the rest of the unhappy tribe members trailing behind Roger; Deena looks over at Rob and says, "Rargh, rargh, rargh," in imitation of Roger's orders. Christy asks if she can lay down some floorboards, but Roger commands her instead to help Rob split palm fronds. As Roger purposely walks away, Christy sneaks a grin at the camera. In an interview, she tells us that she's not working on the shelter because it's a "man thing to do." She spoofs the men as she tells us she's not strong and doesn't have the "mathematical set, frame, plan," that men do. She acts this all out, making muscles, and gesturing at her supposedly empty head. She explains that the situation pissed her off because she wanted to be a part of it: if she's pulling down palm fronds and moving logs, she should get to feel like she had a hand in actually making their bed. Still, she manages to laugh it off and tells us she'll do her part so that they have shelter from the rain.
Two toucans go at each other with their beaks. A grinning Rob glances at the camera, while Deena continues to obsess over being put on palm-frond detail. She faux-boastfully adds, "I'm a pretty good palm-frond-getter myself." Rob tells Deena and Jenna that he wants to put the rest of the ice on the beer, but tha he's afraid of Roger. Jenna insists that he shouldn't be afraid, but I don't exactly see her moving to do it. Deena might, though; it's hard to tell. In a more flattering interview, Rob philosophizes over the different ways people have approached the merger: some have focused on the shelter, while others like him have been busy building alliances and working toward the end of the game. As he says this, we see him "building alliances" with HeiDDi. I'm sure he builds a whole different kind of "alliance" with HeiDDi when the lights are off at night. He tough-talks, "We'll see if you guys that are building the shelter are all gonna be here to use it for more than six to nine days."
A snake slithers through the grass right up to Deena, who is telling HeiDDi that they need to start picking off the strong males. HeiDDi begs that they unload Roger first, and Deena says something like, "Oh, no no no no. No no no." HeiDDi insists that she doesn't care about the rest of the voting order, as long as they get rid of Roger now. Jenna points out that Davey Rockett and Matthew also have to go quickly, because although they're nice, they're a threat in what has become an entirely new game. HeiDDi argues that they really need to get rid of Roger now because if he makes it to the jury, he'll never vote for a woman because he's "hard-core male all the way." Hee. Homophobic Roger is "hard-core male all the way." ["What if there are two women in the final? It happened in Season Four." -- Wing Chun] Accompanied by a shot of Davey Rockett skillfully scaling a tree, Deena voice-overs that her initial reaction was to get rid of Davey Rockett because he's one of the strongest -- if not the strongest -- player out there. She acknowledges that Jenna and HeiDDi had a good point, though, and adds with some amazement in her voice, "Gotta give 'em their due." She disses Roger's misogynistic attitude: "Simply because we have breasts and estrogen, we must be somehow so inferior to that [sic] of a man." She concludes, "Screw him!"
Back at camp, the men continue to work on the shelter with no women in sight -- probably because all the women are off together strategizing about how to get rid of the men. Alex announces that it's just like old times, and Roger responds that they're back to the beginning, and that it seems a little too simple, with six guys and four girls, to resume their original game plan. In an interview, he tells us that it would be almost too easy to vote the girls off, adding that it feels like "something's probably gonna happen here," and that he's not that confident yet. Davey Rockett tells us that the current plan is for the six men to vote off the four girls one by one. He tells us that he'd be worried if he was Christy, because of the plans of the former alliance, but he'd also be worried if he was Deena, because she's been butting heads with Roger.
Storm clouds roll in as the tribe members paint green letters on their orange flag. In an interview, Alex tells us that Roger believes all the men are unified, but that, in fact, he'll be the first to go. It then appears as though Alex is debating himself over the actual voting order, until the camera pans back to reveal that Matt is here too. Matt expresses confusion over the plan to oust Roger before Davey Rockett, and Alex responds, "This has changed. He was bein' an ass earlier." While Alex tells us again that Roger will be the first to go unless he wins the immunity challenge, Matthew stands behind him and looks crazed. Which is to say, Matt stands beside him. Matt finally speaks up to preach that it's important at this point in the game to identify and stick with trustworthy people. Well, that's what his mouth says, anyway. His eyes say it's important at this point to identify weak, helpless targets and lure them away with boxes of cute, cuddly puppies. Or baby Magillas, as the case may be. As Matthew continues telling us that they're very comfortable with their alliance at this point, Alex pipes up to say that when they're down to the last five, they'll "sort it out amongst [themselves]." A glimpse of the Jackée flag follows, which appears to feature a giant Godzilla eating the letters of the tribe's name; a small globe; and possibly a pair of yellow clogs.
A big, full moon finds us at Jackée on Night 19 with the discarded Coors Lights neatly lined up in a row while the tribe continues to imbibe raucously. Someone gets in a cry of "Silver bullet!" which probably pleases the advertisers. The contestants toast themselves, before Rob tells us in an interview that the vibe around camp is festive, but that one member is "pants down sleeping and snoring." I'm not sure if "pants down" is an expression with which I'm not familiar, or if Rob has confused the expression with "hands down," or if this interview took place after the upcoming challenge, and he had "pants down" on the brain. Regardless, Rob points out the irony in the fact that the same person who has separated himself from the tribe is the one everyone else wants voted off. Rob then complains because the women aren't drinking much, which he says "is a problem when you're a guy that looks like" him. He matter-of-factly tells us that even though his only chance with women is when they're drunk, it's still crazy fun at camp.
We rejoin the group as someone -- either a drunken Butch or Alex -- asks Christy the location of the weirdest place she's ever had sex. She reveals that it was on the 4th of July during the fireworks at the Washington Monument. The others cheer. Because deaf people have sex too! In an interview, Davey Rockett tells us that they had "great sex talk last night" -- which I suppose comes in a distant second to actually having great sex -- and that they were swapping stories like friends at home. We rejoin the conversation as Davey Rockett goes on about a time he was with "two chicks," and dared one of them to eat something off his stomach, and that the girl, in response, dared him to eat something off her chest. I'm not sure I understand why they're daring each other. I mean, eat a worm: dare. Chug six beers: dare. Run naked around a parking lot: dare. But engage in foreplay? Not so much a dare. HeiDDi is very interested in the story, while Rob yawns. In another fisheyed interview, Rob reveals that he dislikes Davey Rockett because he thinks he's a slick, smart ladies' man. Still, Rob worries that he could potentially coerce one of the women to vote with him, and that he hopes they are strong enough to "stand up to this rocket scientist and his stupid All-American charm."
We rejoin the group, where Davey Rockett calls on Rob to share with the group his sexual experiences. Davey Rockett does not specify that said sexual experiences must involve at least two people. Rob responds that he can barely call what he has a sex life, because it's "so mundane." HeiDDi and Jenna laugh because they're not sure what "mundane" means, and think it must be a funny word, since those are the kinds of words Rob usually uses. Rob then volunteers that he has "so many crazy ideas in [his] head" (ew), before telling us in an interview that he hardly has any good sex stories -- or any sex stories at all, for that matter. He adds, "Most of my sex stories usually involve me...and a fat girl." Rob tells the group that one time, he was in a room with two girls at the same time. Seriously. That's his story. The others egg him on by insisting that the situation was a potential threesome, while Rob insists that he doesn't think the girls even liked each other. HeiDDi hasn't gotten any attention in a while, so she jumps in to claim that all women would happily participate in threesomes if men just spoke up and asked them to. She calls out Jenna: "Don't you think so? Bein' a women, I think it would." Hee. HeiDDi said "bein' a women." As if there was any doubt. Jenna speaks up to say that she likes being with another girl and a guy, or even just with another girl. Back in the fisheye interview, Rob pops a boner as he tells us that based on the girls' comments on threesomes, he's rethinking his strategy, so that he'll be left alone with them at the end of the game. He says, "I could be havin' a threesome on Day 37 out here, and this would just be the most incredible adventure of my life." If Peachy offered Rob a threesome right now to leave the game, he'd so take it. We rejoin the group and pan over to an open-mouthed, snoring Roger. The other members of the tribe blow out their lanterns and say goodnight to each other -- including Jenna's oh-so-not-clever, "Goodnight, Rob-Boy" -- as we go to commercial.
What's with all this hubbub over Colin Farrell? I mean, he's about one and a half rungs above Will Ferrell on the hotness ladder as far as I'm concerned. He always looks like a three-year-old wearing his father's suit.
The return from commercial finds us at dawn on Day 21. A really hairy spider crawls under a log, as we pan over the camp to see that someone was having sophisticated fun breaking cans open. It's very quiet as we see shots of the sleeping S10, as well as the Coors Light empties laid out in another nice row. I think one of these castaways has an obsessive compulsive disorder, and I've narrowed it down to Roger (since we already know he likes to count things), or Matthew (since we already know he likes to visualize the laid-out dead bodies of his victims). A thumping sound thumps through the still air, and Christy stirs. My viewing companions were highly amused by the fact that of all the tribe members to choose to show being disturbed by the sounds, the editors choose to show the deaf person. I understand that the vibration might have woken her, but it's still kind of amusing. The camera pans over to reveal Roger hammering away at something, and then back to the tribe where we see the other members slowly waking up and looking irritated. Alex stares at Roger from a prone position, slowly brings himself to a sitting position, and then stares at him some more. Roger, meanwhile, obliviously pounds away. In the fisheye interview (and either nearly all of his commentary in this episode was done in one sitting, or the cameramen like to put only Rob in that position and godforsaken angle), Rob tells us that Roger has no idea "how much of a jerk he is." He complains that Roger has no sense of self-awareness, which in my experience is a prerequisite for being chosen for this or any other reality show. One of the thug-like little muscular monkeys settles down to watch as Rob tells us that no one likes Roger, but that Roger can't even tell that.
Rob and Deena discuss the fact that Roger will be voted out 7-3. Rob effuses that he'll be so happy when Roger goes, but that he's planning to keep kissing Roger's ass so that Roger can't tell what's coming. Still, Rob worries that Davey Rockett is "charismatic," and a danger to keep around, which is code for, "But the girls like him better than they like me!!!" Deena insists that Davey Rockett will indeed be the to go after Roger, because the girls are angry that the guys think they're stupid. Deena "argh"s her dismay. She sure makes a lot of pirate-y sounds. Give the woman an eye patch or a hook or even a little monkey on her shoulder and she's good to go!
In an interview, a prettified Deena tells us that Rob "chose" her to work with, and that they've since been "engineering" the whole turnabout. She announces that it's no longer a battle of the sexes, but is instead a battle of the weak versus the strong. Deena complains to Rob that she hates that the other men are "so stinkin' cocky," and warns him, "Never underestimate the power of a woman. Ever." She then adds in an odd, fey-sounding lisp, "Boys, games are for girls." Rob hurries to point out that he hopes "at least one boy gets to come along in this game," and he and Deena fist bop on being the final three, along with Jenna. Deena -- who has a yellow happy face drawn on her arm -- adds, "And then, of course, it's every girl for himself." Rob laughs, but only because he has to.
Matthew catches a fish. As it writhes around in the throes of death, he chants, "Oh, yeah! Who's your daddy?" which are clearly words he's said before in the presence of dying creatures. Deena and Jenna marvel that Matthew caught another fish, and then turn the conversation to the marvel of their own success in the game. Deena reiterates her intent to make it to the final three, but says she thinks they'll need to work the situation to their benefit. She then says something about taking Matthew out of the picture and forcing Rob to go along with them, but I don't quite understand this conversation because Deena should already know how much Rob despises Matt. Matthew reveals that he's caught three more fish: a catfish, "some sort of herring," and a piranha; he concludes that everyone will get at least one fish for dinner. But who gets stuck with the piranha? Jenna and Deena agree that even if neither of them wins a single immunity challenge, it won't matter. Deena then tells us in an interview that Roger, Butch, and Davey Rockett think they own the game. She snits, "Sorry, there was an Adam and then there was an Eve and you remember? Eve just kinda took Adam right along with the rest of the vote." There was a vote? We pan back over to Matt groaning over another fish as Deena boasts that the women are going to beat the men at their own game. She claims that the men have cockily assumed "that the girls are gonna just lie down and let it all happen," but she insists that the women won't meekly roll over and congratulate the men on a victory well earned. Instead, Deena announces, "The game is mine!" She insists that Roger will be gone in the Tribal Council, followed by Davey Rockett. She concludes by telling us that the men can be cocky now, but that they'll be sweating after Roger gets sent home.
The S10-bearing canoe paddles up to Peachy, who appears to be waiting on the same fishing boat that brought the S16 into the Amazon twenty-one days ago. Rob passes up the Immunity Idol, and Peachy struggles to hold it before announcing, "Got it!" as if anyone really cared if the Idol went for a swim. Peachy then busts out a spiky, red-accented necklace and declares, "Now this is what you covet," causing the contestants all to "ooooh" aggressively. He announces, as if they didn't get it the first time, that all challenges from this point in the game are for individual immunity.
Peachy proclaims the day's challenge as simple, requiring only one thing: "Willpower: how badly do you want it?" After Roger wriggles and flails around in a few minutes, though, I'd also argue that the challenge also requires balance, but that's neither here nor there. Peachy sternly reveals that they will each stand on a 4" x 12" perch, which he reminds them is not very big. He warns that if they jump or fall off, or if any part of their hands touches any part of the perch or structure, they'll be eliminated from the challenge. The last person standing wins immunity.
The S10 randomly draw numbers to determine their "perch positions," and suddenly Peachy is counting down. The perches are each about four feet above the water, so I'd like to know how the S10 got up there. Roger is flailing all over the place, and for a second, it looks like he'll be eliminated before the challenge even starts, but he manages to control himself. The camera pans across the entire S10, revealing that everyone else is wearing tank tops and swimsuits, while Roger, frantically rolling up his sleeves, is wearing some sort of clown costume. Seriously, a long-sleeved denim shirt? What was he thinking?
Butch says, "These old bones just aren't what they used to be," and Rob agrees that his "chicken legs" are struggling. Peachy, perched on the boat, reminds them that if they fall or jump off, they should make a quick swim to the fishing boat, because they know what's in the water. Roger starts thrashing around again, and Peachy points out that he's struggling as the camera pans over to reveal a smiling Deena and Jenna.
Alex yells that the challenge wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't so hot outside, as we see Butch wipe his sweaty brow. In case we didn't get that it's hot, a shot of the bright hot sun follows. A defeated-sounded Roger announces that he won't be able to stand much longer, and Peachy snits, "That's confidence. I'll give you that!" He adds that there will be "temptations" ahead, but that if Roger wants to forego those by dropping out now, that's his prerogative.
Roger hangs on, but only because Jenna out of the blue announces that she'll take off her clothes for chocolate and peanut butter, causing Rob to yell, "Get. The girl. Some chocolate. And peanut butter, Probst!" HeiDDi volunteers to join Jenna, and so Peachy produces a plate bearing a big squirt of peanut butter, Oreos, and two glasses of Coke. Jenna confirms that they are indeed going for it, and HeiDDi's already got her shirt half off. Meanwhile, Butch looks at his feet moaning, "Oh, God. Why? I'm not lookin'. I gotta stay focused." Both women are now down to their pixilated upper bits, but HeiDDi seems more concerned with where she can keep her clothes than with the fact that she's naked on a national television show. Jenna, meanwhile, orders HeiDDi just to pull her pants down to her ankles, causing Alex to yell, "Yeah! That's what I'm talking about!" In the background, Butch continues to chant, "I'm not looking,'" adding, "All the kids at school, I'm not lookin'!" Jenna pulls her shorts to her knees, but HeiDDi takes Jenna's earlier command literally and struggles to get her shorts all the way down to her ankles. Peachy complains that the girls aren't even trying to tempt the men, and Dave Rockett insists, "I am lookin'!" Jeena calmly asks if HeiDDi wants to get in the water now, but HeiDDi is still engaged in successfully lowering her shorts. Finally, they both manage to get off their perches and swim toward shore, Jenna looking collected, while HeiDDi looks straggly and confused. She's wondering if she'll be able to get her Deb Shop shorts and top back. Peachy announces that it's only thirty minutes into the game, and that it will take a while for another deal to be offered, but that he still thinks the women earned their reward. The men applaud, apparently because the women successfully managed to remove their clothes. Dave adds, "Well done!"
Roger announces again that he's ready to take the plunge, adding, "Obviously, it won't be as spectacular [when I do it] as [when] these two women [did]." Peachy points out that it's only been thirty-five minutes, and Roger snits that he already made it past his goal: thirty minutes. Despite Peachy's best attempts to talk Roger out of giving up, Roger jumps into the water. Peachy doesn't like quitters and announces, "There he goes. With little fanfare, he's out of the game." Deena, Jenna, and Alex indiscreetly shoot their thumbs up, while Peachy snits, "Didn't even wanna wait for a temptation!" Rob, meanwhile, congratulates Roger on his "good jump."
Clouds roll by, time passes, plops of rain plink onto the water. Peachy announces that it's been an hour, and that he's ready to make the game interesting. He thinks that the now violently windy storm is even greater temptation for the remaining players to give up; Butch yells in response, "I'm ready to come down now!" Peachy reveals that the temptation is "piping-hot pizza," and Butch, Rob, and Alex are all off their perches and swimming for the pepperoni.
Dave, Matthew, Deena, and Christy remain, and Matthew slowly eases himself into a squatting position. I guess it's a temporarily desirable switch, but in the long run I don't imagine it's comfortable to squat for an indefinite period of time. Peachy announces that an hour and a half has now elapsed, and Deena cockily asks, "This is all you got?" She does look pretty comfortable there.
Now the storm has passed, and Peachy asks how long Deena thinks she can last. She smugly responds, "I outlasted Roger; that's all that really matters." She resolutely crosses her arms, and the camera pulls back to reveal Roger, who strokes his beard wondering why she'd care about him, since the women are going . The women are going , already! Got it?
Almost two hours have elapsed, and Peachy busts out yet another covered plate, causing Matthew to whine that he's hungry. Peachy reveals that the reward consists of blue cheese and Buffalo wings, and both Matthew and Davey Rockett are up for it. Davey Rockett eats his Buffalo wings like every man I've ever known, which is to say he inserts the entire wing into his mouth before removing a completely bare bone. Guys, I've never understood how you do that.
At two hours and thirty seconds, we're down to only Deena and Christy. Peachy reveals the last reward: a giant plate of spaghetti and meatballs. Christy drives a hard bargain and asks, "No garlic bread?" When Peachy responds that there isn't any, she looks over at Deena, shakes her head, and says, "No garlic bread." Hee. Peachy gives them sixty seconds to decide if they're going for it, and Christy asks if Deena wants the necklace. Deena responds that they'll share, before announcing their intent to Peachy. Peachy questions whether they mean to share the food or the immunity, and Deena confirms that she means the food, as if that's all the answer he needs. Peachy prods further by asking who is going to "take the fall," and Christy and Deena decide to play Rock, Paper, Scissors to determine the victor. Christy throws scissors, while Deena may throw a rock, even though it looks more like she throws nothing at all and just stands there proclaiming her victory. Christy innocently asks, "So I lose?" because evidently she didn't see Deena throw anything either. Peachy announces, "Rocks breaks scissors," as Deena makes an obnoxious "get down" gesture at Christy. So Deena is the Amazon's first individual immunity winner at two hours and forty-five minutes. She does a screwdriver into the water as the rest of the tribe members cheer her on. Once Deena's on the boat, Peachy points out that she "negotiated it like only an attorney could," and managed to come out of it with both the food and the immunity. Deena and Christy then enjoy some laughter and fist-bopping over their spaghetti.
A tiger peers through fronds as the tribe paddles back from the challenge. An old-looking otter appears to be struggling through the water, and I hope it didn't choke on a Coke flip-top. Back in the fisheyed interview, Rob informs us that the only way Roger could win a challenge is "if it's a contest -- Name that Perry Como Song, or perhaps What Type of Prune is This? -- or some sort of other thing that only an old man like Roger would be able to determine." And as much as that's untrue and hateful to older people, it still kind of amused me. Alex smugly tells us that the game worked out better than expected: "We had the best time out there. Naked chicks, shyeah! Pizza, shyeah! Roger was stupid enough to jump off and get himself nothin', shyeah!" He laughs as he claims that Roger has no idea of his imminent departure, and deems it a "beautiful day in the Amazon." He laughs himself nearly to the point of tears.
We rejoin the tribe, where Matthew is blowing on the fire while sticking his hands directly into it. Matthew obviously thrives on the pain. Deena tells us in semi-baby talk that after returning from the challenge, the men prepared wood because "that's what men do best," while the women stayed in front of the fire to keep warm. We see a quick, random shot of HeiDDi apologizing for "crowd[ing]" the others, and then Deena closes her interview by telling us that "poor Roger" was trying to plan tribal activities for the evening, completely oblivious to the fact that he wouldn't return.
Deena announces to the tribe that she doesn't have to pack, and then questions whether the others would be offended if she didn't. I'd be offended if she did pack. I'd also be offended if she talked to me the way she talks to these people. But then again, I'm not a moron. While all the other members of the tribe encourage Deena not to pack, Roger sits and stares blankly ahead. In an interview, he tells us it's a simple fact that the women are gone. He claims that everything is falling so easily into place that it's almost too good to be true. Didn't we hear all of this before?
Back at camp, HeiDDi is going on about the peanut butter, and Rob reenacts his "Jeff, get these girls some peanut butter" shtick. Rob needs to accept that while he may be funny, he's not funny enough to repeat all his jokes. HeiDDi claims that in order to get more peanut butter, she'd grind the peanuts herself -- between her breasts, no doubt.
In a joint interview with HeiDDi, Jenna announces that they are the "original Survivor Girls Gone Wild." HeiDDi adds, "We're the Amazon chicks!" and then cracks herself up over it. Jenna's comment? Kind of funny. HeiDDi's? Not so much. They insists that they're having fun, and Jenna is amused that the men are talking about how they'll try to "spare" the women in the process of voting them off. Jenna says it's especially bad with Roger, who thinks he's "just got it in the bag."
, in a particularly inspired piece of editing, we cut over to a clip of Roger literally holding a bag while the tribe packs up for Tribal Council. Because he thinks he's got it in the bag, you see? Davey Rockett voice-overs that the four women realize that they're going to be eliminated quickly because the "six males are starting to stick together a little bit better." He says that the women shouldn't be surprised, what with the 6-4 breakdown, and that they're obviously "lookin' to go packin' pretty quick."
A pointed shot shows Roger inquiring about the status of a pot before leaving camp, because he thinks he's returning. Does everyone have that? He thinks he's returning! But he's not!
Again with the fisheye interview, Rob informs us that he realized early on that the men are a "bunch of jamokes [sic]." Rob claims that the other men don't think the women are capable of taking them out, and that he is confident he'll be the "last man standing" in the game. I'm not sure how that's worth bragging about -- essentially it's fifth place, right? That's hardly an "Honorable Mention." The editors continue to be down with the punning this week, as we go to a shot of an off-kilter Rob nearly losing his balance while getting into the boat. You see what they did there? The whole "last man standing" thing? Rob wraps it up by announcing that the men have absolutely no idea what's going on around them. Well, they know they saw four naked breasts recently, and that's probably good enough for most of them.
The standard tribal trill accompanies Jackée's arrival at Tribal Council. Peachy welcomes them, and points out that the last time he saw them, they were heading off together as a new tribe. I'm confused, since the last time he saw them was at the individual immunity challenge, and they'd already done the whole "new tribe" shtick days before that. In any case, Peachy asks about their first order of business as a new tribe, and Butch -- who responds very stiffly since he's not used to these cameras in his face, having not given a single interview yet, as far as we've seen -- answers that they wanted to "establish a place of residency." Sounds like they're trying to get in-state tuition, not playing Survivor. Butch adds that it was important to the tribe -- and then clarifies the statement to say it was important at least to him -- that they included everyone's opinion in coming together as a team.
Rob adds that everyone had a part to play, and if someone didn't know what part that was, "there was [sic] a couple people that were more than happy to tell you where you should be going and what you should be doing." Because their shelter went up so quickly, he acknowledges that their system might have actually worked. Peachy is eager to read between the lines and asks whether Rob is saying people became bossy quickly, or whether he likes "being subservient to the people who decide what to do." Hee. Rob answers without hesitation, "I like being subservient to the people that decide what to do." Double hee. Davey Rockett snickers behind him.
Peachy asks Deena whether any of the women actually participated in the building of the shelter, and she responds, "Putting the logs together with the four corners of the foundation? No." She backhandedly says that they did have the chance to bond with each other, though, and that was more important.
Peachy calls out Roger who, according to Peachy, has a "real smug look on [his] face right now." Roger can't be blamed for his permanent facial expression, though, can he? Roger insists that they had "too many Indians, in this case" working on the shelter, and that if more than four people had tried to help, they wouldn't have succeeded. I guess "Indians, in this case," is code for "weak, helpless women"? ["Isn't the expression 'too many chiefs, not enough Indians'? As in, too many people trying to boss everyone around, and not enough people getting bossed and doing the actual work?" -- Wing Chun] Roger concludes that the most important thing the new tribe needed to do was quickly establish a strong and stable structure.
Peachy turns the discussion to the challenge, and mentions the strip show by Jenna and HeiDDi as a "highlight." "Aside from the fact that [they] got naked for peanut butter," he questions where their confidence came from in giving in so quickly on the immunity challenge. Jenna responds that if she gets voted out because she jumped off for peanut butter and cookies, it was still worth it because she had fun and the food was good. HeiDDi agrees.
Peachy calls out Roger for giving up so soon afterward, and Roger claims that he "rationalized" his decision because he knew he wasn't going to win, so figured he might as well just give up. Peachy asks whether the situation would have been different had Roger felt the same exhaustion but known he absolutely had to win to avoid being voted out, and Roger admits that, "obviously," if he felt he really needed the immunity necklace, he would have given it his all. D'oh!
Peachy asks Deena whether she wants to give her immunity away to protect someone else in the game, and she firmly responds, "I choose not to. I choose to assign it to myself." And who does she think she is? Kelly Taylor?
It's time for the vote. Roger is first; he writes down Christy's name and says he wishes she'd hung in there during the challenge. He commends her for her contributions to the tribe, and claims that if she'd won, she definitely wouldn't have received his vote. Duh.
Deena votes for Roger: "Reality check. And mate," and again with the "Never underestimate the power of a woman" line. Isn't that a deodorant slogan?