Previously on Survivor, the members of Maraanu found their own food and then raided Rotwo's camp for more of the same. Peachy tells us in a voice-over that the raid caused Rotwo to become "more unified," but I think their reaction could be better described as "to become less unified, and cannibalize the idealistic Moppet in their first-ever Tribal Council." But maybe that's just me. In any case, Rob "had a message" for John (which we didn't see when the episode aired). He warned, "I know exactly what you're doin'. First chance I get, I'm gonna getcha." So Moppet lovers everywhere were heartbroken as the Rotwos proved themselves Rotools (tm elizabethann), John got a pre-kneecap-breaking warning, and eleven remain.
A full moon, racing clouds, and the waterfall find us at Rotwo on Day 16. Robert tells us that the four original Rotu members made "a little pact" to try to control the game and become the final four. They bathe at the waterfall, and Tammy jumps off a cliff with victorious arms. Robert continues explaining that the group is confident that they're in control. As they plot, John says that it's not "BS" that if they play it right, the winner will come from their group. He tells the others that he's been waiting for the tribe to lose an immunity challenge so that he could get rid of the Moppet. So basically, John was just looking for an excuse to de-Moppetize Rotwo, and all that "untrustworthy" drama was just a smokescreen. John says in a confessional that his leadership "has emerged" since they voted off the Moppet; there was "definitely a shift," and now everyone knows he's the leader and is "running the show." We see a clip of John apparently weeding around the watering hole. John tells the group to concentrate on the reward challenge; he contends that the immunity challenge is not important, since they outnumber the former Maraamus 4-3 and thus will have voting control. He wants to put their "best personnel" in the reward challenge, but first he'll need to clear that with the bureaucrats in Human Resources. Robert tells us that John has made himself "the power guy" in their "little group," and that's fine with him. He plans to sit back and relax while John "take[s] the grief" and becomes the target.
Now John stands with his arms outstretched under the waterfall while he tells us in a voice-over that this was his "new tribal baptism." That's the kind of comment that should really embarrass him when he watches this show five years from now. But then again, by the time this show wraps up, it will probably be the smallest offense in about a million ridiculous things he's said and done. In any case, John says he got "silly," and decided to go skinnydipping. He semi-moons the tribe and then turns around and fills up the front of his shorts with water. I just write it down, people; I gave up trying to make sense of it about three and a half seasons ago. John makes sure Robert knows he's going in naked; meanwhile, Zoe looks amused while Tammy just looks bored. After all, if Tammy wanted to see balls, she could just look down. Because it seems to me she's better equipped than are any of the wimpy men they've got out there. Anyway, John cannonballs naked and tells us in a voice-over that it was like washing off "all that other stuff" and starting anew. He calls it a symbolically powerful moment which demonstrated another level of their relationship; he says he wouldn't be comfortable doing a naked cannonball in front of the other members of the tribe. He doesn't appear to care whether either group is comfortable with his doing a naked cannonball in front of them.
Now we join the other members of the tribe as Rob says he hopes they win the immunity so that they can merge and align with the members of Maraanu. He concludes, "Otherwise, we're goin' out." In a confessional, he tells us, "Without a doubt, we're outnumbered 4-3." Rob tells us that they put themselves at a big disadvantage by losing the Moppet, and talks again about the 4-3 split. It doesn't seem like a difficult concept to me, but it must be, since everyone keeps repeating it. Now Rob tells Sean that Vecepia is "definitely disassociating herself from [Sean and Rob] in a real clear and obvious manner." In a confessional, he says that Vee is driving him crazy, because she's so obvious, and he doesn't trust her, and he never did, which hearkens to mind to good old days of Talking Rudy Doll, and "I don't like 'er...and I never will!" Sigh. Meanwhile, Vecepia ominously doggy-paddles along the shoreline. Despite his problems with Vecepia, Rob tells Sean that his main goal is to get rid of John; he then tells us exactly the same thing in a confessional. He concludes that if they lose the day's immunity challenge, either he or Sean will be voted off. I hope Sean and Rob don't ride this "we're the to be voted off" shtick all the way to the final two.
Now the Whimsical Music of the Elderly and Half-Witted plays as we join the Maraanu camp. Paschal tells us that the situation is more casual at Maraanu because of the availability of food. He admits that they're no physical match for Rotwo, and that they know that. They'd be morons not to know that, but I'm not 100% convinced that at least one member of this tribe is not one.
The members of Maraanu now creep around after crabs. Kathy finds one and exclaims, "Holy Mother McGrady, look at this dude!" A giant crab is trapped under a log with Gina on one side and Kathy on the other. I'd definitely head out Gina's way, but this is a crab we're dealing with, and like to like, so who knows? In any case, they take turns swatting at the crab from both sides, while it swats back. I have no idea why they don't use a sturdy stick to drag the crab out, instead of putting their fingers at risk. Kathy tells us in a confessional that she was "always concerned" that being "this small little band of women and one older gentleman" was a losing situation. Now that she's among the group, though, she knows it's about spirit, energy, and desire.
Vaudevillian music plays as the members of Maraanu continue attempting to catch crabs. (Tee. Hee.) No doubt Mark Burnett is at the other end of a ten-foot piece of string, and giving it a sharp tug every time Kathy or Paschal gets too close to a crab. Paschal talks nicely to the crabs and says things like "golly," while Kathy commits mental and physical abuse as she swats at them and calls them "booger[s]" and "boogerhead[s]." Paschal's nasty side finally comes out when he yells, "You sorry son of a gun, you!" to a crab that's clawed him. We learn that it pinched him badly, and then we see the dismembered arm of a crab with kung fu death grip on a branch. Paschal, incidentally, could use some bigger shorts. He's showing more leg than the women. Not that that's a complaint in all cases. In a confessional, Kathy tells us that they didn't eat well at Rotu because they had more tribe members and less food. She says they didn't eat breakfast or lunch -- only dinner. As Kathy and Paschal relax side by side, we see a crab very slowly attempting to escape from its basket. It's cautiously creeping sideways and then makes a quick break for it, but Kathy's too quick and catches it again. We learn that particular crab's fate -- along with the fate of a whole mess of its comrades -- lies in a pot of boiling water. The upside? The crabs can no longer hear Kathy's cackling and guffawing through the walls of the iron pot.
Paschal says that if they win the reward challenge -- which they seem already to know, at this point, is food -- it will be a big victory because they're eating well, while Rotwo is not. Neleh thinks the other tribe will be more concerned about winning food than winning immunity because they most likely already have an effective alliance in place. Gina is looking forward to seeing which one of her former teammates got kicked off, and Paschal says they will all be shocked if the ejectee is not one of the two people they're expecting it to have been. Neleh thinks Rob will be gone, but the others think it's Sean. I think it will be the Moppet, but I have absolutely no basis for this belief. As they eat the crabs, Paschal announces that food at Maraanu is much easier to get than it is at Rotwo; Kathy that it's "so fresh," as well. Did Rotu have frozen crabs? Paschal says again that they don't need the food like the members of Rotwo need it, and is this episode particularly repetitive, or is that just me? And also, this episode seems very repetitive.
We join the members of Rotwo as they discover a paper-covered blue plate with chopsticks in their treemail. Robert suggests that the prize might be "sushi," which would be kind of ironic -- like a free ride when you've already paid. John jumps up and down and makes Elisabeth faces because he's really excited for food. ["Which kind of belies his insistence later on that Rotwo doesn't need food and that they're better off without it." -- Wing Chun] The clue reads, "It's time to visit a mystical place/ The perfect setting for your race/ Across land and sea in the fastest time/ The first tribe finished sits down to dine." As soon as they hear the words "in the fastest time," the tribe starts celebrating, because how could they possibly lose a race against the Maraanus? After Robert enthusiastically finishes reading the last line of the clue, John says there's no way the other tribe will beat them. His tribemates agree, and Tammy says that any food at the finish line will be "motivation enough." They shake on it.
Maraanu arrives at the challenge first, and Paschal is sleepy; he's rubbing his eyes. The members of both tribes are, of course, clinging to one another. As Rotwo approaches, Paschal says in an amazed and dismayed voice, "They voted Gabe off." Kathy gasps, and Gina doesn't get it until she looks for herself. As a tribe, the members of Maraanu are dumbfounded, but I'm guessing Neleh's used to feeling that way. Still, they grin at the Rotwos as they pass by.
Peachy proclaims that the reward challenge will be a "jungle relay race," in which four members from each tribe will compete. The race will have three legs (which is not nearly so endearing as a three-legged dog, but that just might be me): first, a member from each tribe will race through the jungle until he reaches a paddle tied to a log. The competitors will untie their respective paddles and continue racing, tagging a teammate along the way. The two tribe members must stay together until reaching a second tied-up paddle. They will then carry both paddles to the second leg of the race, where they will break open coconuts until they find a key. The key and paddles are then passed to the other two competing members of their tribe. In the final leg, the teams will use the key to unlock an outrigger canoe. Each pair of competitors will then paddle out to their tribe's flag -- which is in the water -- retrieve it, and paddle back. Once on shore, they are required to drag their boat to within reach of its chain, and the first tribe to reach a tiki on the beach with both paddles and the tribe's flag wins. Got that? Peachy then says that on such a hot day, they'll definitely want the prize, which is surprisingly not Mountain Dew, but something equally gag-worthy called Sierra Mist. The S11 cringe more than smile in response. Then Peachy reveals a plastic-covered plate with a sampling of the meal that awaits them: it definitely contains chicken, bean salad, and a "really nice dessert." It may also contain beets, but I couldn't quite make out the word. Competing for Rotwo will be Rob, Zoe, John and Robert. Competing for Maraanu will be Neleh, Paschal, Gina and Kathy, because they don't get any choice.
Paschal and Rob are doing the first leg, which is mostly running, and Paschal trips right from the start. He's so skinny and gray and desperate -- he looks like a prisoner of war, which is what my mother-in-law says of my husband when he shaves his head and grows a beard, and which has never made any sense to me since he's a very well-fed man. Anyway, it seems like a particularly cruel pairing, but as my viewing friends pointed out, Maraanu didn't have much else to go on. Zoe keeps advising Rob to "take it easy," but Rob wants him some bean salad. Rob reaches the paddle first; Paschal arrives not too long afterward. Rob unties his paddle first and takes off through the woods. I thought the two members had to stay together, but Rob is way ahead of Zoe, who he must have tagged at some point. Paschal finally finishes untying his first paddle just as Rob and Zoe reach their second. Half-witted Neleh grins as Paschal tags her and they run, because running is FUN! She then tries to take the paddle from Paschal, but he won't hand it over. Neleh reaches Maraanu's second paddle first and waits for Paschal; she then tags him because, apparently, he's it! Paschal and Neleh begin working on the paddle just as Rob and Zoe finish and take off with theirs.
Rob finds the key in an early coconut-smashing attempt; he and Zoe tag John and Robert, who quickly head for their canoe. John is all ready to paddle and then realizes that he doesn't actually have a paddle; it's still on shore in Zoe's hand. He runs back to retrieve it, and then he and Robert are back in the canoe with Neleh and Paschal still nowhere in sight. John counts off, "Ready. One, two..." as he and Robert prepare to lift the canoe into the water, but he picks up on the "two," which is definitely a sign of bad things to come. He and Robert then apparently decide to take a short cut to their flag by paddling the circumference of the island, as opposed to the more obvious straight line; seriously, first they're paddling parallel to the shore, and then they're paddling backward. Zoe looks on and asks, "Where're they goin'? Gina and Kathy, by this time, have reached their boat. John, meanwhile, snits to Robert, "Steer, steer. I'm rowing, you steer!" Miraculously, Robert does not lift his paddle and conk John over the head with it. Kathy and Gina have no such problems, and it's a straight shot to their tribe's flag. Back on shore, Neleh is excited, because winning is GOOD! Tammy, Sean, and Rob hold hands and probably pray. It's neck and neck as the teams return to shore, and Peachy keeps yelling, "Pull it to your chains! Pull it to your chains!" Gina and Kathy are out of their boat first and take off for the tiki. Suddenly, Neleh is screaming for them to get their flag, because they've left it on the boat. Kathy returns to the boat to get the flag, as John passes her with his flag, places it on his tiki, and Rotwo wins!
Except not.
Maraanu instantly begins complaining because Robert wasn't with John at the finish line. Gina points out the problem, and Kathy furiously repeats, "Rob wasn't here!" She's pissed! Peachy tells Rotwo to "hold up," because "Maraamu's protesting." It turns out that even if Robert had been there, Rotwo would still have been disqualified. Peachy explains that the canoes needed to be in reach of their chain, and demonstrates that while Maraanu's chain reaches, Rotwo's chain does not, in addition to which, "The General was not at the tiki." That sentence alone, I think, sums up the ridiculousness of this game. It sounds like a poorly translated phrase, or something you'd see some ninety-year-old grandmother in Japan cluelessly wearing on a t-shirt. Peachy apologizes for speaking too soon, and proclaims, "Rotu, you do not win. Maraamu wins." Kathy begins waving the Maraanu flag, while John, Tammy, and Robert look livid, and Sean cries in the canoe. ["Rotu are such poor losers." -- Wing Chun] Paschal, meanwhile, slips the immunity idol some tongue.
It's now Day 16 at Maraanu, and the feast awaits them at camp. Neleh "love[s] picnics" because picnics are HAPPY! It's a big spread with about twenty bottles of Sierra Mist, lots of chicken, and oddly enough, a basket full of suckers. No, not the forty-eight contestants from seasons 1, 2, and 3; candy suckers. There's also bread, and ice, and vanilla sandwich cookies. Kathy wedges an entire chicken leg sideways into her mouth and then carries on a conversation. She thinks the "bean thing" is especially good, and wants to know what's in there because "it's like a relish or something!" In a confessional, Gina tells us it was an important victory -- not because they needed the food, but because they needed to keep Rotwo away from it. And why is there quiche there? Who ever really wants quiche? Neleh kids us not that she ate twenty cookies. Kathy even manages to be bossy here; she tells the others to eat slowly so that they can eat longer. Or maybe so that she can eat more.
Kathy then says that she feels bad because the members of Rotwo were so "grumbly." She wants to know if she's ever been "that grumbly," and no one snits, "Never! (Except always.)" Paschal then expresses the "utter disbelief" he felt that morning when he saw that the Moppet was gone. He says he was shocked. Kathy says, "I mean I was really shocked!" because shocking old folks like Paschal and half-wits like Neleh means nothing, but shocking someone so wise and magnificent and all-knowing as Kathy is the real kicker. Neleh says that the Moppet was probably the strongest member of Rotu and that he did everything for the tribe, so she thinks there must be some "big quarrelly stuff goin' on over there." And big quarrelly stuff is BAD. Gina tells us that the four Maraamus feel like a family. Paschal says it's "heaven on earth" for him: "An old guy like me with three women...does it get any better than that?" Yes: three women who don't include a half-wit, a Watermelon Queen, and Kathy. Kathy girlishly giggles that she loves when Paschal says that; she then covers her mouth and burps. The burping and the girlish giggling do not complement each other. Gina says Kathy's burp is going to make her throw up, and Paschal says, "Guh-ross!" Hee.
The members of Rotwo walk back from the challenge in dismay. Tammy tells us that three quarters of the time they think about food, so the loss was a huge disappointment. Zoe thinks the Maraanus are going to end up sick to their stomachs, and Robert says, "I hope they're pukin' right after they eat it." In a confessional, Rob tells us he "smoked everybody" in the race and did his part, then "handed the key to Dumb and Dumber," who proceeded to screw it up. I wouldn't brag about "smok[ing]" Paschal, but that shows what kind of man Rob is. As we see the obligatory shots of the tribe eating food that is not chicken and quiche and bean salad, Rob tells us that Maraanu is now eating "all kinds of good food." He complains, "We're over here eating roots."
John tells us in a confessional that it wasn't that big a deal to him to lose the challenge, which directly contradicts what he said earlier. While smashing coconuts with Sean, he voice-overs that the reward was just a meal, and that he avoided apologizing for the loss: "I am in a leadership position, and I'm not gonna apologize because we lost." John tells Sean that the four members of Maraanu are going to be "crappin' their brains out" and "sick as dogs." He says that the food looked great, but that cucumbers, green peppers, and beans are "high, high gas foods," and they would "bloat up in a second." Not a visual I particularly needed. As the tribe eats their squiggly food, John announces that he wouldn't have touched the reward food because "two hours of yum-yum" is not worth three days of "shitting [their] brains out." ["Yeah, I'll just bet that if Rotwo had won, they'd have declined to eat it for health reasons. Whatever, John." -- Wing Chun] And it keeps right on getting prettier. Robert says that a "wonderful meal don't mean nothing," and Tammy adds that they have twenty-six days left and didn't go out there to eat fried chicken and quiche. They all agree as she says they're there to play and win the game, and that's what they're going to do. Well, technically only one of them is going to do that. In any case, Sean calls them "The Tony Robbins crew" for their positive thinking skills.
In a confessional, Sean tells us that even though it's the same food every day, they keep convincing themselves it's something new, and credits that to "us[ing] your imagination." John brags about the way he cooked the meal: he cooked the seafood first, then poured off the juice and kept "some little white pieces" before adding the coconut. I don't want to know what the "little white pieces" were if they weren't actually the coconut. Sean makes a hysterical and most likely unintentional series of faces as he eats; he's rolling his eyes, twitching, and semi-gagging. Tammy tells us it's not that bad, but it's not fried chicken, either. Which is why Kentucky Fried Chicken has lasted all these years, and why Marquesas Pan Cooked Snail never got very far. Zoe compliments John on the "great recipe," and Robert calls the meal "delightful," which may or may not be sarcastic. Sean -- who is off by himself chewing and chewing and chewing -- tells us, "I still say the chicken would have been the bomb." He then says what may be one of my favorite lines of the season so far: that John said they would "crap their pants," after the reward challenge feast, but "what else we got out here, but nature and opportunity?" It was worth keeping Sean around just to hear him say that. Not really, though.
Now it's Night 16 at Maraanu, and they just can't let the Moppet go. Neleh reads something he wrote, which begins as follows:
In the jungle insects creeping
In the love shack eight friends sleeping [kinky!]
We've got fire, food, and shelter
Water for the tropic shelter...
And then there's some line about the "pig pit" that Neleh is unable to read. Incidentally, we should all be on the lookout for the Moppet's name in the credits as a "clue writer" season, because he clearly has what it takes. Throughout this scene, the tinkly music from theFelicity"Winter Finale" may or may not play in the background. Gina explains in a confessional that the Moppet had written Paschal a poem (if you want to call it that), and that they had bonded like a father and a son. She tells us that Paschal didn't have any sons, and that he's repeatedly said that if he had had sons, he would want them to be like the Moppet. (I read in a chat with the Moppet that he thought of Paschal more as a brother figure than as a father figure, but that's neither here nor there.) Kathy makes a fuss of making sure the note gets back to Paschal, quite possibly because she thinks Neleh might steal it, because poetry is PRETTY! They all agree that it's "really special," and we all know what "special" means on Survivor. Paschal looks at the paper sadly, and again says he was "flabbergasted" and "bitterly disappointed" that the Moppet is gone. He remembers what it was like to be the Moppet's tribemate, and what the Moppet offered to the group. Paschal then shakes his head and laments, "Twenty-three years old," and I missed the part where the Moppet died. As he says, "What a kid," we see that Paschal is crying. In a confessional he tells us that he still "loves everyone dearly," but that everything's different now. His world his shattered, and he'll never be the same again. Everything he believed in is gone, and he's staring into the abyss of a life on the island without the Moppet. He then falls to his knees and screams in anguish, "Oh Moppet, why have your forsaken me?" Actually, he doesn't go that far, but he really does push the drama envelope. He concludes his monologue by saying that they are who they are now, and everything else is in the past. Neleh says it makes her so MAD, and that the Moppet shouldn't have been the one who left. Because voting the Moppet off was not FAIR and now she feels SAD. Kathy agrees that he was very "talented" and shouldn't have been voted off, except you know she's secretly pleased because it's better for her if he's gone. Paschal leaves, and Neleh says she knew it would break his heart, and broken hearts are BROKE. The sun goes down on Paschal's broken heart, as night turns to day at Maraanu.
Now it's Day 17 and Kathy does Tai Chi or yoga or something on the beach. Gina tells us it's very relaxing and peaceful at their tribe; she says they're at the point where they can "just hang out." Which is distinctly different from being at the point where they can "just let it all hang out," which is something I would be completely uninterested in seeing, and what a difference those three little words make. Paschal asks Kathy about the morning's antics and wants to know if it's "all in the breathing." Kathy preaches that "it's for breathing and...just de-stress [sic] yourself." Paschal wants to know how long it takes, and Kathy says that it's "Chi Gong" or something that sounds like "Chi Gong" and that may or may not be "Chi Dong," but is definitely not "Long Duck Dong," and that it only takes five minutes. In a confessional, Gina tells us that Kathy is "awesome" and is "very 'go get 'em.'" She says that Kathy may be even more adventurous then Gina is. Now Kathy pats down her whole body down from toes to cheeks and makes a big "aah" sound as she stretches. Paschal sounds skeptical as he asks, "Now, what does that do?" Kathy says it "just gets you goin'," and Paschal says, "Oh, okay."
Now it's Kathy's turn to pat someone else's back for once; she says Gina is fitting in very well with the new tribe. At the beginning, Gina was "tentative," but she's since come out of her shell. Still, Kathy thinks there is some politicking going on in the tribe. We then see Neleh ask the others, "Have you ever felt each other's aura by just puttin' out your hand?" Neleh makes Paschal extend his hand and then yells at him to move slower. She wants to know when he can feel the heat; she says she can feel him when their hands are at least two inches apart. Paschal says he can't feel it at all, and Neleh yells that he's "numb, old and numb!" But at first I thought she said that he was DUMB! Kathy tells us that she's aware of the bond between Neleh and Paschal, and is concerned that Gina will step into Kathy's shoes. But I bet Gina has much smaller feet, being a dainty Watermelon Queen and all.
Kooky music plays as Gina creeps toward Neleh with her hands behind her back. She wants Neleh to close her eyes and smell her hands, and in my household, that never ends well. It turns out that Gina is holding a pineapple; Neleh sniffs and says it's "really sweet" and guesses that Gina has CANDY! Gina then reveals the pineapple, and explains that it's soft, so they can cut it open. Neleh then tells us in a confessional that they're now one big tribe, and that's how she plans to finish playing the game. Meanwhile, Paschal coddles the little pineapple. Paschal likes to coddle things. Neleh continues telling us that she loves Gina "to death" (because Gina is NICE!) and feels closer to her now than she does to some of her other tribe members. The camera shows Kathy violently hacking away at a coconut, and we're supposed to think Neleh means Kathy, when really she most likely means her former tribemates on Rotu. Neleh then calls Gina a "good little picker," which is probably a really high compliment where she comes from.
John then claims that the new Rotwos are part of the tribe, and that if there is a "traditional merge," he gives his "absolute word" that the former Rotus will go first. Still, he doesn't trust Rob, who looks bored and irritated. Rob promises that he won't "try to, like, swing to the other side," and then John also gives his word, but also must have the last word by adding, "And don't try to fuck me!" Rob and John shake on the pact, and they want Sean to shake on it, too. No one cares if Vecepia shakes, because they know she'll just do whatever she thinks will make them happy. Rob tells us that he thinks he convinced John "to a degree" that Rob is trustworthy and part of the team. He adds, "I want 'im to trust me. But he shouldn't." As they conclude this discussion ,and Rob walks off, he suddenly asks John, "Are you gay, dude?" John says, "Don't ask me that," but then he answers in the affirmative. In a confessional, John calls the question "very passive-aggressive," and is bothered because it was a "throwaway comment." He tells us he's thirty-six years old and has been out for a long time. He mockingly tells Rob, through the camera, "Thanks for outing me." He concludes that Rob is bothered because, "this thirty-six-year-old gay boy from Omaha is running the show and just whippin' his pants." And boy, was there a lot of homosexual subtext in that last segment. I hope Rob's friends give him a lot of grief for it. On second thought, I hope John's stupid friends give him a lot of grief as well.
We are still at Rotwo on Day 17, where the decomposing skull of some animal awaits us. A dirty-fingernailed Rob makes a fishing pole, and for the very first time ever tells us that the immunity challenge is critical because if they lose, he'll be voted off. He explains that Sean, Vecepia, and Tammy have to compete because they sat out in yesterday's challenge; he plans to be the fourth competitor, because if they lose, he wants to know that he gave his best effort. He warns us, "Don't count me out." He doesn't threaten to send someone after us, though, if we do count him out.
John poses on a rock as he voice-overs that his alliance had a conversation about who would be the to go. John tells the others that Rob is "desperate to do something" with the other tribe, and that they'll "sit in a much better place" if they get rid of him before the merge. He calls Rob "a little bit dangerous," and points out that this might be their only opportunity to get rid of him. In a confessional, John tells us that his "gut" is "screaming" that it would be better to lose the challenge in order to eliminate Rob's threat. If my gut were screaming at me, I'd be more concerned. Anyway, Tammy tells John that she can't go into the challenge trying not to win. John says that she doesn't have to throw it -- she should just avoid doing anything extra to help the others if they fall behind. Which would still qualify as "throw[ing] it," I believe. He points out that a million dollars are at stake, and then tells us in a confessional that some battles are more important than others. Tammy hates the idea of competing in the challenge when the others don't want to win. John insists again that it will be better if Rob's "just gone." Tammy tells us in a confessional that she doesn't know what she'll do in the challenge.
We don't hear the immunity challenge clue, and the S11 show up in a field where a huge, circular maze awaits them. Peachy reclaims the idol from Neleh, who smiles at it because she LOVES her dolly. Peachy explains that within the giant maze are hidden five rungs. The tribes will begin to each other and move in opposite directions through the maze to locate the first rung; they will then use that rung to begin building a ladder in the center of the maze. The first tribe to collect all five rungs in order, build the complete ladder from top to bottom, and climb to the top of the ladder with the flag is the winner. Peachy says that, "to make it interesting," they'll all be tied together. Not that it matters, since they'd all be holding hands anyway. We learn that Rob will lead Rotwo, and we already know who will lead Maraanu, because she always leads.
From the beginning Rotwo takes the lead; Kathy appears to be running straight for the dead ends. The members of Rotwo find their first rung, and the sidelined people clap half-heartedly as it's placed on the ladder. Meanwhile, Kathy is getting snitty with her tribe; she tells them she wants to go to the other side of the maze, and Paschal humors her by saying, "Okay, we're right behind you." She snits back that she just wanted to tell them what she was doing. Rotwo has located the second rung, and at this point, it's clear that Tammy is definitely not throwing the challenge. As Maraanu continues to flail, Peachy tries to help them by reminding them it's a "big, circular, maze, guys." But the members of Rotwo have already found their third rung before the members of Maraanu even have one. Then the tribes collide and each side piles up, and man, that's funny. Kathy stops to get her bearings, and I don't know why she didn't just turn around and follow the other tribe out since they're clearly superior at finding their way through the maze. Even Gina looks annoyed by now. They then bang into each other again, and Kathy shoves Rob. That's comic gold, people. Finally, Maraanu emerges from the maze with their first rung, and Kathy acts surprised that Rotwo is so far ahead. Peachy rubs it in by saying, "Maraamu, finally on the board." Kathy realizes that she's totally screwed up and tries to place some blame on the others by screaming for them to "help [her] get back!" Gina is too busy rolling her eyes to help; Neleh thinks the maze is COOL!; and Paschal's about to collapse. By this point, Kathy is running aimlessly; she keeps peeking around corners and then frustratedly turning each way. At one point, every single one of her tribemates yell that she's going the wrong way, and Neleh snarks under her breath, "We've been that way a hundred times!" And as much as I despise Kathy, since I've never seen Neleh actually try to lead at anything, she doesn't have room to talk. Kathy keeps pointing where they need to go, but she never can actually get there because mazes -- who knew? -- don't operate in a straight line. Meanwhile, Rotwo has placed its fourth plank on the ladder and quickly locates the fifth. Kathy yells that she others should go "fast," and despite that piece of inspired advice, Rotwo claims the victory. The expected celebration/commiseration ensues. Peachy and John are genuinely sorry that someone from Maraanu is going home. And as embarrassed as Kathy should be by her leadership failure, Tammy should be more embarrassed by her hip-thrusting victory dance on at the top of the ladder. ["Because the members of Rotu are bad winners, too." -- Wing Chun]
Pretty cliffs. Little crabs climb big rocks. It's now Day 18 at Maraanu, and this sad occasion calls for sad music. Neleh pouts because she did not get her WAY! We see her ask how Gina's day was, and Gina explains what she found on the island, which was neither "trocha" (a line of fortifications, usually rough, constructed to prevent the passage of an enemy across a region) nor "troika" (a Russian carriage drawn by a team of three horses abreast or a team of three horses abreast), but something sounding like both those words.
Kathy tells us she feels bad because they didn't have fire when they returned to camp. She says, "I did not do a good leadership role in the maze, and we got back and I drowned out the fire." She cackles and makes a throat-slitting gesture. I bet her husband watched that admission of failure over and over and over again. He's probably never heard it before. We then see Gina telling Kathy to take the sand out of the fire, and Kathy says she lit it that morning without taking out the sand. In a confessional, Kathy explains that she and Gina go back and forth over the sand issue; she says she always put sand on the fire at Rotu and that it worked "like a charm over there." She thinks that "maybe the sand was different over there." Gina is clearly annoyed as Kathy explains that they were low on firewood, so she "beefed it up," but then it got cold, so she covered it. Gina explains in a measured voice that sand puts out fire. Kathy suggests piling the hot coals together, and Gina points out that there are no hot coals. Kathy insists that some were hot to the touch when she first dug them out, and Gina responds, "Well, not anymore." In a confessional, Gina diplomatically says, "I know whenever I go camping, we put sand on the fire to put it out." Kathy hangs her head low and says that they just didn't burn enough of a "sand bed." Gina doesn't say "sand bed, shmand bed," but clearly wants to. Still,she patiently tries to help Kathy get something started.
Kathy now tells us in a confessional that she hoped the members of Maraanu would enter Tribal Council that night "after having a conversation," but Gina thought they shouldn't talk, so she won't bring it up with the others. Neleh and Paschal crack open shellfish and discuss how the "little guys" don't like to break. Most living things don't like to break, but whatever. Kathy says that the other members of the tribe don't have "enough guts" to talk about the vote, but she thinks they should "own up to it, man." She wants to figure it out, and then enjoy the rest of the day. Except the others all know that if Kathy were the one headed out, there'd be no enjoying of anything. We see Gina tell Neleh and Paschal that their fire is out. In a confessional, Gina tells us that the vote is difficult; she doesn't think they're going to vote her out just because she wasn't with them originally. She says she might be wrong, but that she doesn't feel that way. At first, I thought Gina wasn't going to rat out Kathy to the others, but then she walks up to Neleh and Paschal and quietly says, "I just don't like that sand idea she uses." She adds, "That's how you put out fires," and Paschal says that's what he thought, too. Gina explains to us that she has to vote for Kathy because she knows Neleh and Paschal won't "vote on" each other. The cracked-open snails sit before them, and Gina wants to know if the others have eaten them raw before. Paschal says he hasn't, adding, "I'm not gon' start tonight, either," while Neleh cringes. In a confessional, she tells us that she's been back and forth on her decision all day. She knows she's not going to vote off Paschal, but she's having a hard time deciding between the other two. Kathy tells us that the vote will be a secret until the very last moment. And so we enter the first Tribal Council at which an old man and a half-wit hold all the power.
Jabba the Tribal Council Hut. Tribal Trill. The Maraanus enter with their lit torches, and I wonder where they got the fire from? Peachy wants to "get right to it." He says that as "true underdogs," they came on strong, and he wants to know, "What kind of tribe is this?" Paschal says that he didn't think they'd be able to duplicate the Rotu bonds, but that they have, in fact, surpassed that closeness. Peachy acts surprised, and then wants to talk about their loyalties. Kathy thinks "the spirit of Rotwo" is still "lurking about" on the other beach. She says it has diminished, though, and that, together as members of Maraanu, they've created something new. Peachy wants to know whether -- if the merge happened tonight -- they would remain together as the Maraanu tribe, or would they turn on Gina? Kathy answers immediately that they'd go as the four "strong," and Paschal and Neleh both agree "absolutely." Peachy wants to know whether Gina is "still the black sheep," which reminds me of when my cousin called me the family's black sheep during his toast at my wedding (I hate saying "my wedding," but I was worried that if I wrote "our wedding," there'd be some confusion as to whether I married my cousin) and makes me smile. I never really thought of myself as the black sheep, and I've never thought of Gina as one, either. Gina insists that they're definitely a tribe, but more like a family. She earnestly states that they don't want to vote anybody off tonight. Peachy then turns to Kathy and says that during the challenge, she was "draggin' these guys like they were schoolkids who didn't wanna get up!" He asks if at any point she thought, "Yikes!" Probably she thought "Dude!" or "Holy Mother McGrady!" He asks whether she worried that she'd become the tribe's scapegoat, and Kathy says that her "head hung low" because she felt like she failed the tribe, but it's such a "family feeling" that she felt fine once she got back to camp and extinguished their fire. Peachy asks what they're basing their votes on, since they are such a tight family. Neleh says that she picks a different person every ten minutes, and that the question has been going through her head all day. She says she honestly has not yet made her decision yet. And also that she wishes she had some crayons.
We see no votes, but we do see all of the Maraanus' pensive faces superimposed over the flames. Then Peachy returns with the footy urn, which would look cute in my living room. I bet they sell those at Bombay Company. Anyway, Peachy reads the votes: Gina, Miss Kathy, Gina, and Gina. It's not very suspenseful, but Kathy still looks very pleased with herself. So Gina makes her typically sweet-natured exit, and then Peachy tells the others that they "kept insisting" on using the word "family" instead of "tribe," and "sometimes families have to make hard decisions." And I know families inflict all sorts of crimes upon each other, but I've never heard of a family actually voting someone out.
week on Survivor, banjo music plays as the tribes merge, then proceed to hug, pray, and lie their asses off.
As the credits roll, Gina says she understands the vote. She wants her "awesome" tribemates to play well, and says she's had the time of her life. No, she's never felt like this before. Yes, she swears it's the truth. And she owes it all to you!