Last week on Survivor: Kucha had chickens and fish and brutally slaughtered pig, oh my. Ogakor headed to its third straight Tribal Council and disagreed to disagree: twice. Finally, Mitchell hugged Jerri and didn't catch on fire. He did head home, however. Maybe he'll write a song about it.
At Ogakor, Colby tells us they've been "hearing the trees explode and crash" and that smoke from the fire has overtaken them. Lamber's pretty eyes are watering, which she realizes is different than crying. Tina tells us it's been "an interesting morning." Lamber deadpans that losing Mitchell was a surprise, and Jerri tells us it was a "pretty dramatic evening" and that their "little group of common voters has been pretty much busted up." We then see Jerri and Lamber whispering, and the island definitely has an echo, because Lamber is repeating everything Jerri says. Meanwhile, Keith and Colby snuggle up in the tent and play backgammon. Lamber tells us that it "seems like since Tina was able to get Colby to sway his vote last time to vote for Mitchell, seems like maybe he, uh, might sway again to their side. But we're, um, almost kind of fighting over him." Jerri's wearing some new evil little glasses as Colby tells her that his vote at the Tribal Council was strategic. Jerri says she's not harboring bad feelings about it, and then shoots a catastrophic fireball his way. She tells Colby that they're most powerful if they vote the same. He insists that he is, for the time being, going to keep voting for the weakest contributor. Jerri says that that means it's pretty much the end of any alliance and Colby says, "Jerri, I don't care," with a fabulously tired and indifferent tone in his voice. Jerri plays with a little stick that looks an awful lot like beef jerky to me and then rubs it on her lips as Colby says that he is only concerned with winning the two immunity challenges. Jerri pouts, because the Texan auto customizer may be immune to the powers of her evil glasses of persuasion.
Kimmi greets Kucha's chickens with, "Good morning, stinkees." She tells us it was a tough night and that nobody slept. Jeff says he woke up and there was a hot coal on his shirt, and exclaims, "There was a little fire in my wooly!" Alicia repeats, "Fire in my wooly!" and says, "That's not the first time I heard that," which means nothing to me but was still pretty funny. The tribe has a light moment here until Jeff points out that the coal could have landed on Alicia's face, and she thinks about it for a second before responding, "Okay. That's not funny." Jeff tells us the fire was "popping coals" onto the tribe throughout the night and will need to be moved. This may mark Jeff's first ever comment lacking sarcasm, bitterness, and just plain bitchiness.
Kucha appears to be getting along famously with each other, while Kimmi appears to be getting along famously with the chickens. They succeed in moving the fire, and Rodger tells us it's going to be a cold night; he then announces that it's "chicken killing time." We learn that Kucha wasn't able to eat all of Babe, so it's time for Chicken #1 -- will it be Polly, Henrietta, or Ruby? As Rodger sharpens the hatchet at Alicia's insistence, Kimmi keeps the chickens company, peeking in and poking at them, calling them "ladies" and "brilliant hens." Mike tells us in a confessional, "I tell Kimmi, 'For your own self-preservation, let go of the chicken thing. Stop talkin' about 'em. Stop getting involved.'" We then see Nick tell Kimmi the butchering is imminent and she walks off with, "That's my cue. See you later. Bye!" Mike continues in his confessional, "Stop making a big spectacle when you leave. 'Oh! You're butchering the chickens. I'm out of here. Dah dah dah dah dah.'" During the "dah dah dah" part of the speech, Mike waves his hands around and acts like he's dancing, and suddenly I decide that the challenge should be which tribe's members can do the chicken dance for the longest. I see Rodger prevailing. Mike then tells us that Kimmi's behavior is "too theatrical" and "too much" but last week he put on a one-man production of Lord of the Flies so he's not one to be talking. I notice that as Kimmi walks off, she's carrying a bookmarked book and not her Scrabble board. Mike tells us with no drama whatsoever, "I'm ready. I feel the need to shed some blood." As the tribe gathers around to watch the slaughter, Rodger announces, "I don't enjoy killing animals, neither. I don't, really." Elisabeth says maybe she'll do it time but I don't believe her. As the tribe barbecues Polly, we see Kimmi sprawled across a log looking upset while dramatic new age-y music plays in the background -- perhaps the latest Enya song, "They're Eating Someone's Mommy."
“ Jerri tell us 'the whole hunger thing' has been a 'huge hurdle' for her. And also that it's been a hurdle for her in the past as well, when she's been going for her daily cappuccino and nearly stumbled over some damn homeless person. ”
Ogakor eats rice, and Amber tells us the food situation could be better and that they're definitely not eating as much as the other tribe. As evidenced by Mitchell. Jerri tell us "the whole hunger thing" has been a "huge hurdle" for her. And also that it's been a hurdle for her in the past as well, when she's been going for her daily cappuccino and nearly stumbled over some damn homeless person. Jerri is pretending to do stuff and hoping someone else will take over the actual doing. She finally asks Keith for help "like her older sibling," he says, and I think she'd probably choose different words like, "like a rogue puppet," or something like that. Jerri is upset because they've been dumping fish guts near their camp, and she thinks the tribe is not catching fish because the fish are all full from feasting on their brothers, sisters, parents, and friends. She harasses Keith until he agrees to bury the fish downwind of the camp, and then she thanks him like she just won a major victory. As Keith buries the fish, he irritably mumbles in conversation with himself that, "It's not that big of a deal. Apparently, it was. Fish, and they're all buried. Dead fish." Keith then tells us he doesn't stand up to Jerri very much because it's too exhausting. Jerri tells us being hungry bothers her. Duh.
Back at Kucha, Kimmi says she thinks the tribe should conserve its chickens. Alicia immediately gets in her face and says they need protein every day. Suddenly, it's Springer Break at the Kucha camp. Kimmi wants to know "what the hell's up [Alicia's] butt," and Alicia starts in with the finger-waving in Kimmi's face. Elisabeth just stands there in the middle of it. Kimmi tells Alicia not to wave her finger in her face and Alicia responds, "I will always wave my finger in your face," which is some kind of threat. ["And was unanimously voted the catchphrase of 2001 by all present in Wing and Glark's living room. Djb, is your finger still waving? 'Cause it better be." -- niki] Basically the argument centers around Alicia being "tired of [Kimmi] and the fuckin' chickens." Alicia storms off and Kimmi seems overwhelmed. In a confessional, Alicia tells us she doesn't "really appreciate [Kimmi] to begin with," but that she tried to walk away from the situation before it "potentially turned ugly," but that Kimmi wouldn't let her. She says it "made me wanna just run up and grab her by the throat, but I, I had to keep my wits about me." Common sense dictates, however, that in order to maintain one's wits, one must have wits to maintain in the first place. Jeff is upset because he missed the drama, and Alicia repeats that she never liked Kimmi and that when Kimmi "jumps on me, I will go at her guns loaded." Alicia, who did all the jumping, doesn't need guns against Kimmi.
Kimmi tells us that she's a big girl and she's not too attached to the chickens and that Alicia has always had problems with her, which seems to be the truth. She tells us that she merely suggested they not eat three chickens and a pig "back to back." We then get a "She Said / She Said," scenario which goes back and forth between the two parties talking about each other. Kimmi says Alicia is very critical and condescending, and "I will not be treated, um, you know, like a jerk-off." Alicia continues to tell the story to Elisabeth and Jeff, but she omits all the finger-waving parts. She continues storming around and says, "If you're gonna make sense, you can say whatever you want to me. But if you're not gonna make sense keep your mouth shut." Jeff gleefully says that he knows the explosion was coming and, "Kimmi was befriending the chickens, and giving them names, and petting them. And, um, Alicia just had no patience. Alicia doesn't have a lot of patience for anybody, really." Elisabeth tells us, "Alicia is in charge of telling people to do things. Alicia is also in charge of talking trash about people," and giggles. Alicia then announces that she's going to "live and let live," because they have to work together. If "live and let live" means "continually harping on the subject." Kimmi says that since they're on the same team, they at least have to keep their poker faces on. As we go to commercials, we cut to a clip of Alicia making a decidedly un-poker face.