Tommy walks out of his apartment (so I guess Sheila didn't get him kicked out) and finds a cop writing him a ticket. Tommy bitches and complains and then tries to say that he's a firefighter and on the job, so he shouldn't get a ticket. The cop is unimpressed and starts to walk away. Tommy says, "We should stick together. Two Irish guys. We're a dying breed." How are Irish guys a dying breed? It's not like the Irish aren't reproducing. A lot. And I say that as someone who's partly Irish. Anyway, the cop is Jewish. He asks Tommy, "You know the difference between Irish guilt and Jewish guilt? Whiskey." Tommy laughs at the joke and takes one more shot: "Look, man, I've been on the job twenty years and I lost sixty guys on 9/11..." The cop interrupts, "9/11 was four years ago, champ. Deal with it. You've had your day. They wrote books about you guys. They put you up on a pedestal. And what happened? Turns out you ain't just heroes. Turns out some of yas do blow, and have gangbangs. Turns out some of yas are just broken down drunks on the verge of a complete and total mental collapse. America don't like it when things get complicated. Pal." Man, does he have Tommy's number or what? The cop gives Tommy a stern look and walks away. Tommy opens his truck's door to get in and a beer can falls out. Heh. The cop looks back, so Tommy kicks the beer can under the truck and gets in.
Lou and Chief go to see The Grinch about getting Tommy reinstated, but Grinch isn't having it. Lou says that no one on their crew has guts like Tommy. Grinch agrees that Tommy has guts, but adds that he also has a big mouth. Lou throws out that Tommy quit drinking two days ago, and Grinch is unimpressed. Chief tries to argue some more, but Grinch shuts him down and says it's not going to happen.
Tommy sleeps at the kitchen table in his new house, and then wakes with a start. He gripes that he hasn't read this much since high school, and then amends that to say that he never read a book in high school. Tommy asks his co-worker why it's so slow, and supposes that it's because they're on an island, surrounded by water. He moves on to complain about how long his commute is, and another co-worker suggests that he take the ferry. Tommy responds, "Do me a favor? You ever see me on the ferry? Shoot me in the goddamn head." The other guys talk about a big fire at a nearby grocery store, but then reveal that it happened years ago. Tommy sighs, and then the other guys ask him if he can sing, because they need someone to join their group for the Firefighter Barbershop Quartet Nationals. Tommy puts his head in his hands, about like you'd expect. They reveal that their group's name is the Smoketeers. It was supposed to be the Smoke Eaters, but no one pronounced it right. Anyway, their star member got into a bar fight and was punched in the throat. The guys talk over one another with excitement as they reveal that they're going to sing "Coney Island Baby," and that Tommy could sing lead. Tommy waits a beat, clears his throat, and then says, "All right. I'm going to go upstairs and leave you three guys alone so you can all blow each other."
Lou and Chief walk into work. Lou asks about Chief's wife, and he says she's doing well, but that she gets worse towards the end of the day. As Chief walks away, Lou gets a call from Tommy. Tommy immediately starts bitching again about his commute, and says that he'd blow up the Verrazano Bridge, but that the terrorists would get the credit. Lou asks whether Tommy has found his family yet, and Tommy says his cousin and brother are on it, but there's nothing yet. Lou says that they spoke to Grinch for Tommy, but that it's going to be a tough sell. Tommy wonders if they could get rid of Sully. Lou doubts it, because while he thinks Sully is a phony, everyone else really likes him. Lou adds that Sully is like a chick, because he can talk to anybody about anything. Cut to Laura and Sully sitting on a couch, sipping coffee like a General Foods International commercial, having a discussion about Laura's hair and giggling. Cut to Lou saying that Sully is a cooking genius. Cut to Sully presenting a number of different fancy dishes. Tommy groans that they're never going to lose him. Lou adds that Sully is also part owner of a paintball course on Long Island, and that he took the guys out and they had a blast. Cut to Mike and Garrity getting pegged with paintballs. Tommy says that they have to do something, because he's going crazy: "The other night, one of the guys on the crew lit two matches. It was the biggest fire these guys have ever seen." Lou commiserates, and asks if Tommy wants to get some coffee. Tommy says he's late for his AA meeting and has to go.
Mike rings Theresa's doorbell. She answers, laughing at someone in the apartment, and looks shocked to see him. Mike wants to come in, and Theresa says that it might be uncomfortable, because Walt's there. Mike is confused. Theresa reminds him that she told him she was going to start seeing Walt. Mike didn't get that. Okay, there's a difference between garden-variety dumb and mentally challenged, and Mike is starting to fall into the latter category. Like he's all mouth agape and dull-eyed. Theresa points out that Mike's lack of acuity is part of the problem in their relationship. Mike asks if she's dumping him, and Theresa gives him the "It was fun while it lasted" speech. Mike tells her that she's making a mistake, because he's a good-looking guy in great shape and he's a firefighter. He screams that he can get any girl he wants, and Theresa cringes away from him and then runs into her apartment, slamming the door. Mike paces around in the hallway all crazy-style.
Tommy's stuck in traffic when his phone rings. It's Uncle Teddy, and he's sitting in a bar, drinking shots. He asks whether Tommy's heard from his father. Tommy thought his father was still in Ireland, but Teddy informs him that, through the magic of postcards, he knows that Pa Gavin was in Ireland, then France, then Germany, and that he finally sent a picture of himself standing on the Great Wall. Tommy asks, "Of China?" Teddy responds, "No, Peru! Of course, China. How many Great Walls are there? There's only one. That's why it's Great." Tommy sighs, and Teddy tells him to hold on while he watches the end of a horse race. Teddy's horse loses, and Teddy curses up a storm. He comes back to the phone, and Tommy asks where his father is getting the money for his travels. Teddy says he got a letter from Pa today with a photo of Pa and "some Chink broad," and that he thinks Pa is her boy toy. Tommy thinks that Pa is too old to be anyone's boy toy. Teddy notices a man in a suit eyeing him from the end of the bar and quietly asks Tommy if he has any money, because he owes "some major cash to people." Tommy asks how much he needs, and Teddy says he needs $26,000. Tommy holds the phone away from his ear for a moment, shocked, and then asks, "I'm sorry. Who is this again?" Teddy says he has to go, and that he'll call later. He quickly grabs his coat and leaves the bar, and the guy in the suit follows.
Franco arrives home, and Laura gives him the bullet on Keela's bedtime rituals. They chat familiarly for a moment, and Laura asks how physical therapy was. Franco downplays it and asks if he can pay her for babysitting, but Laura refuses. She starts to walk out, but Franco grabs her arm and pulls her back. She asks what he's doing, and he says he's going with the moment as he kisses her hand. Laura laughs and says she doesn't think so. Franco says he has to show his appreciation somehow. He leans in for a kiss, but Laura pulls away and asks if she can tell him how it's going to go. She seems tempted by Franco's offer as she says, "You'll be really cute and really funny and really handsome and make great faces until I sleep with you, which I eventually will, because you're a tall stud and I'm as unlaid as a pile of bricks." Franco thinks it sounds good so far. Laura continues, "But, then I'll want more out of the relationship eventually. You know, with me being the woman and all, and I'm so goddamn good in the sack, you'll actually try to commit for the first time in your life. You'll change for me, Franco, but then you'll resent me, and then I'll resent you for resenting me, and pretty soon we won't be able to stand being in the same room with each other, never mind forcing our body parts to intersect. But we have to be in the same room because we work together. So, unless one of us dies in a fire or moves away or kills the other one, we'll constantly be forced to remember the horrific, bloody train wreck of a relationship that started with your hand on my coat. But it's your move, stud." Laura says all of this without malice. She has clearly seen this moment coming for a long time. Franco lets her go, and Laura tells him he's a smart man as she walks out the door. I liked her speech, except the part about how, because she's a woman, she would want a relationship. I mean, it's in Franco's character to avoid commitment, and it might be in Laura's to want commitment (although we don't really know enough about her to know), but if so, it's not because she's a woman. Shut up, male writers.
Tommy arrives at Sheila's, and she immediately starts giving him shit for being so late. Sheila starts stomping off to bed, but Tommy stops her and says that he bought her some chicken soup for the baby. Sheila comes back into the kitchen and notes that it's the first time he's said the word "baby." Tommy denies it, but Sheila says that usually he just points to her stomach and asks how it's going. Tommy asks how it's going. Sheila says that her stomach is a little off, and then tells him that since sex is out of the question, he might as well go home. Tommy calls out, "I quit drinking!" That brings Sheila back again. Tommy mutters that he was at a meeting, which is why he's so late. Sheila looks touched and gives Tommy a big hug. Tommy says thathe was kind of shaky, so he didn't want to be alone tonight. Sheila asks if he really quit for her and the baby, and Tommy lies that he did. Sheila hugs him again, and Tommy asks, "So, is a blowjob out of the question?" To her credit, Sheila pushes Tommy away, grabs her soup, and stomps on out for good this time. Tommy claims he was kidding and follows her to the stairs.
Chief and Jeannie are in bed, when suddenly she starts beating the crap out of him. Chief holds her off and asks what she's doing. Jeannie starts screaming that she knows what Chief is doing with her best friend. Chief says that the best friend moved out of state twenty years ago. Jeannie doesn't seem to hear him, and she scratches Chief's face deeply and runs out of the bed.
"Trouble" by Ray Lamontagne plays on the soundtrack as Tommy and Sheila lie in bed. Sheila's snuggled up, but Tommy is wide awake. He finally gets up and goes down to the kitchen for some orange juice. He looks around for a glass, but instead he finds a bottle of Bailey's Irish Cream. Hey, I have the same glasses as Sheila! I'm not sure I should be excited about that. Tommy grabs the bottle and pours himself a full glass of Bailey's. It kind of looks like chocolate milk. He grabs it, but hears a noise. He discovers that there's blood dripping into his glass. He looks up, and sees Jesus on the cross, dripping really poorly done CGI blood droplets. Yikes. Tommy throws the bottle of Bailey's out into the yard, and then creeps back into the kitchen, but his visions are over.
Montage! Franco dumps some pills out of a prescription bottle into his hand. He finds that there aren't any pills left, so he pops what he has and checks the label, looking discouraged.
Teddy walks out of a deli and spots Suit Guy waiting for him. Teddy takes off at a brisk walking pace, but he's not very fast, and Suit Guy is right behind him.
Mike calls Theresa from a pay phone and starts screaming at her about how he should do the dumping because he's the man: "You're a fat, disgusting bitch who's never going to get laid good again. 'Laid well again,' 'laid good again,' that's not the point. The point is, you're a fat pig, and I only did you 'cause I felt sorry for you! Go to hell, bitch!" There's a name for people who scream obscenities on the street, and it starts with "schizo" and ends with "phrenics." Mike might want to look into some therapy and medication.
Tommy drives his truck and calls Mick, who is in bed with a lady friend. Tommy says he knows it's early, but that Mick is his sponsor. Tommy reports that he feels like having a drink. Mick says, "Don't." That's all there is to being a sponsor? I could do that. Hell, a tape recorder could do that. Tommy says that he hears voices, and that he's got a thirst and he really wants a couple of drinks. Mick tells him not to. Tommy isn't impressed with Mick's advice, so Mick says, "Go ahead and take a drink, you pussy." Tommy scoffs, but he has another call, so he hangs up.
The caller on Tommy's other line is Colleen. Tommy pulls over so that he can concentrate as other drivers honk their horns. Tommy asks Colleen if something is wrong. Colleen says that she stole Janet's cell phone. Tommy wants to know where they are. Colleen ignores the question and starts bitching about her new house. She's definitely Tommy's kid, with the constant complaining and ignoring her conversational partners. Tommy asks again where they are. Colleen says that she misses him. Tommy says that he does too, and asks again where they are. Colleen is worried that Janet will kill her for telling. Tommy promises not to reveal how he founds out, and Colleen says they're in London. Tommy thinks she means England, but Colleen clarifies that they're in Ohio, near Columbus. She cries and asks Tommy to come and get them. Tommy says that he will, and hangs up. Oh, this isn't going to go well. Not that anything ever does for Tommy. Which is usually his fault.
Tommy is talking to his boss at the Staten Island firehouse, who says he can't give Tommy time off. Tommy begs, but his boss can't do anything for him. Tommy points out that they're not exactly busy, but the boss says he can't take the risk that something might happen, and that they'll be shorthanded. He adds that the only guys getting time off are the barbershop-quartet dudes, who have a competition in Ohio. Tommy's eyes light up.
In the firehouse, Tommy has just informed his co-workers that he had twelve years of Catholic school, so he had to be in choir, and the nuns said he had a voice like an angel. Vinny asks what part he sang, and Tommy fibs that he sang all parts. Sal says that they already got Carmine to take the empty slot, and Tommy denigrates Carmine's singing abilities. Tony agrees that Carmine is often flat. But Carmine already knows all of the songs! And he serves as their roadie, and they promised him he was in if they ever had an opening. I think the only thing sadder than "Barbershop Quartet Member" is "Barbershop Quartet Roadie." Tommy points out that this is the big show for the trophy. Vinny isn't even sure there is a trophy, since they've never come close to winning. Tommy says it's for bragging rights, not that you would want to brag about it. Vinny asks him to sing something for them, like an audition. Tommy tries to get out of it. Carmine walks in as Sal insists that Tommy sing something. Tommy says he's not warmed up or anything, but finally agrees to sing "Silent Night." The other guys take a seat and wait. Tommy clears his throat a few times and starts singing. Denis Leary actually has a decent voice, and he's purposely trying to sound bad, because he's inconsistently bad. He also doesn't know the words. To "Silent Night." After twelve years of Catholic school. Regardless, the guys agree that he's in, so Carmine must be really bad. Sal announces that they're leaving right after work for Ohio in his SUV, and that the drive will take six or seven hours, so they'll have plenty of time to rehearse. Sal asks if Tommy can read music, and Tommy asks, "What do you think?" Tommy gets all cocky about his new role, and even poses for photos with the other group members. He's going to feel differently after seven hours of "Coney Island Baby." My high school had a barbershop quartet and the day of our spring concert, the guys walked around the halls practicing (and attention-whoring, albeit misguidedly) and I wanted to stab myself in the eyeball.
Chief walks into the house, and Lou notices the giant scratch on his face. He advises, "time you try banging the cat? Put little booties over its paws so it can't scratch. That's what I do." Chief admits that Jeannie did it in the middle of the night because she thought Chief was screwing her friend. Lou is sad that Jeannie is slipping, and then asks if Chief is screwing her friend. Chief acts all offended, and then admits that he screwed the friend thirty years ago, and that his wife left him for three weeks, but that it's ancient history. Chief says that the doctor told them that Jeannie's situation "is like a deck of cards -- you got a full deck, you just can't control the shuffle." Franco walks up and asks if they know where he can get his Vicodin refilled. Lou points out that the prescription has been refilled twice, and Chief says that Franco needs to get a new prescription or go see the "voodoo guys" downtown, who won't give him Vicodin, but will give him something for the pain. At first, I thought Franco was really dumb for not understanding how prescriptions work, but then I thought that he was just playing dumb to try to find an alternative to seeing his doctor, who presumably wouldn't refill the prescription. Franco starts to leave, and Chief informs him that they're trying to get Tommy back into the house. Franco is not pleased to hear the news, since Tommy almost got him killed. Lou says that Tommy just wants to talk, and Chief asks if Franco will sit down with him. Franco says that he'll think about it. Sully walks through with banana bread. Lou comments that Sully is a prick, and Chief agrees, but says he loves banana bread.
Mike is changing in the locker room when Garrity walks in. Garrity! Why does everyone get a storyline this season but him? Garrity asks how things are going with Theresa, and Mike lies that they're good, and then says that he dumped her yesterday. Garrity is psyched to hear it, and admits that he thought Mike had gone completely mental. Garrity says that he met a girl at a health club, and that she has a friend who needs to be fixed up, and that Franco is all hung up on his hideous scar, so Mike's the best option. Mike agrees to do it, and Garrity starts to leave, but then has to come back for one more high five.
Tommy and his crew are leaving for Ohio. Carmine is carrying the uniforms, and tries to box Tommy out for shotgun. Tommy just tells him to get away from the door, and Carmine obeys. Sal tells Tommy that he can't smoke in the truck, and Tommy mutters, "Yeah, that's gonna work." Sheila calls and Tommy says he can't talk. Sheila starts talking baby talk: "The diddle baby says he wants his big daddy to bring some more soupy. Do you think that Big Daddy can bring some more soupy woupy?" Oh my God. Tommy responds, "That better be the baby talking, because if it's you, Big Daddy's going to come home and punch you right in the face." Sheila laughs and says she'd like to see him try. Tommy says he has to go because he has another call. Sheila says that she needs Tommy to come home because one of her neighbors threw a liquor bottle at her statue of the Virgin Mary.
Tommy sighs and switches to his other call. It's Johnny! He wants to know if Tommy's talked to Teddy lately. Tommy hasn't. Johnny says he heard some guys saw Teddy being pushed into a car outside of the OTB. Tommy reveals that Teddy said he owed a lot of money. Johnny is worried, and says he'll look into it. Tommy says that he got a lead on his family, and that Colleen called and they're in Ohio, so he's leaving to find them right now. Johnny stops walking and says quickly, "Yeah, that's great Tommy. I gotta run." The question is, does Johnny just not want Tommy to find his family, or does he know where Janet is, and is he actively preventing Tommy from finding her? I thought it was the latter at first, but given what happens later, I think Johnny just doesn't want Tommy to find his family. Does Johnny know that Tommy quit drinking? I don't think he does. Tommy gets into the truck. Sal says it's going to be exciting, and Tommy answers, "I'm coming in my pants as we speak." Tommy gets in the SUV, and before the engine even starts, the pitch pipe sounds and the guys start singing. Tommy looks like he's in hell.
Tommy and crew arrive at the hotel and practice a song in their room. We don't get to hear Tommy singing, though. Tommy thinks it sounds great, and that they should stop practicing so that they don't "peak too early," since they have five hours before the competition. Carmine says that Tommy's a little flat, and Tommy responds, "Who asked you, Equipment Boy?" Tommy's phone rings, and it's Colleen.
Cut to Tommy walking out of the hotel, his crew following behind. Tommy says he's going to take Sal's SUV, but promises to be back in plenty of time. Sal is pissed, and says that they don't have a chance anyway, because they suck. He thinks it'll be just like the other years. Since the writers clearly had a good time coming up with the names of the groups, I'll transcribe Sal's speech here: "The Five Alarm Four from Denver, Mrs. O'Leary's Cowboys from Chicago, The Red Hot Papas from Kansas City -- they're going to wipe the stage with us." Carmine has a brilliant suggestion for a new name: "The Pole Smokers. You know, like we come down the pole so fast, we're smoking!" The other guys don't have the heart to tell Carmine why that is a horrible idea. Tommy pulls up in the SUV and tells the guys to take a look at themselves, and that they look like a bunch of losers. He continues, "Stand up straight! Where are we from? New York, right? The greatest city on the planet Earth. And who do we represent? The greatest fire department in the history of the fire department. That's right! Let's act like it. We can kick these guy's asses at anything! Football, hockey, even some pussy thing like singing. Correct? FDNY! FDNY! FDNY!" The crew joins in the chant, getting psyched up. Tommy points at Carmine and says that if Tommy doesn't make it back, Carmine's up, and then speeds off, leaving the guys standing there, mouths agape.
Tommy's old crew pulls up to a fire. Chief tells Garrity and Mike to go to the top floor and work their way down in a search. Lou and Sully should go to the floor above the fire and do a search. Franco and Laura should go to the basement. Inside, Mike radios that the search is negative. Garrity wants to know what happened on his date, and Mike says they went back to her place and had some more beers. Garrity asks if he scored, and Mike says it was easy. Garrity wonders if Mike will see her again, and Mike says he doesn't know, because "she was so skinny, it was like she was sick or something. I kept thinking of those starving Ethiopian kids you see on TV. She had these little twig legs. When we were doing it, her hips were like cutting into me. It hurt." Garrity calls Mike he's a pussy. Mike says he was afraid to get on top of her because he heard a cracking sound. Garrity says he's scared: he wonders if Mike wants another fat chick. Mike says no, and then mutters, "Not another one."
Chief and Lou have a private conversation outside. Chief says that he found out some dirt on Grinch. It seems Grinch has an illegitimate daughter his wife doesn't know about. Lou asks if they're talking about blackmail. Chief wonders if they're going too far, and Lou says he just wanted to know ahead of time so that he could fully enjoy it.
Tommy sits in Sal's SUV on a residential street. A truck pulls into a driveway, and Tommy watches as Janet and his kids get out. Janet goes into the house and the kids stay outside to play in the snow. Tommy gets out and says hello to his kids, who greet him with big hugs. Janet comes out just as the kids are complaining about their new house. Tommy tells the kids to go in and pack up their things, because they're going home. The kids are psyched. Janet asks how Tommy found them, and Tommy says that Johnny traced Janet's credit cards. Janet doubts it, since she hasn't used her credit cards in three months. Tommy doubts that, and tells her to pack her stuff and get ready to go. A guy who looks sort of like Tom Arnold when he first appeared on Roseanne -- mullet and all -- comes outside and asks Janet if everything is okay. Janet introduces him as Steve, and says that he's a firefighter in Columbus. Tommy glares at the guy, and asks to speak to Janet, but she indicates that Tommy should talk freely with Steve there. Tommy asks tersely to talk in the truck, and Janet heads off and says she'll be right back. Tommy turns and tells Steve, "I had that same haircut. In 1975." I think that joke would have been funnier if he'd said 1985, because in 1975, Tommy was probably rocking some longer shaggier hair.
Tommy and Janet sit in the truck. Tommy says he can't believe she thought she would get away from this. Janet says she had to give it a shot. Tommy recaps how she stole his money and his kids, and sold the house that he bought. Possessive, much? He adds that he could have her arrested. Janet tells him to do it, because at least in jail, she'd know that he couldn't get at her. Tommy scoffs and says that there's no place that she can get away from him. Scary! Tommy makes fun of Steve, and says it's a joke that Steve is a firefighter, since all Janet did was complain about Tommy's job for years. Janet yells that it was never about the job; it was about him. She begs Tommy to leave them alone and starts to get out. Tommy, desperate to get her to stay in the truck, blurts out that he quit drinking. Janet sighs, "Again?" Tommy says very sincerely that he really quit, and adds, "I went through a really rough time after you guys left. I had a couple of episodes. I almost spun off the planet. I'm no good without you guys. I need...I need to have you back home." He stares into Janet's eyes. She stares back, considering, and then gets back into the truck. She asks about Sheila. Tommy, willing to say anything at this point, says that it was a mistake, and that he can fix it. Janet reminds him that Sheila's three months pregnant. Tommy admits that he doesn't know, but says he needs some time to figure it out. He tells Janet to go in and pack her stuff and get the kids, and that they'll go home and start over. Janet says she needs to think about it. Tommy asks her again, and Janet asks for fifteen minutes. She gets out of the truck, and Tommy waits.
Tommy's singing buddies run outside the hotel in their matching striped jackets, looking for Tommy, who is nowhere to be seen. I would pay a lot of money to see Denis Leary in that costume.
Tommy checks his watch, and then goes up and rings Janet's doorbell. No one answers at first, but then Steve opens the door. Steve says Janet's gone to her own house, which is two blocks away. She grabbed the kids, slipped out the back door, and ran home to pack up her car. Tommy says that her truck is in the driveway. Steve says that the truck is his, and that, to get them to come with her, Janet told the kids they were going to meet Tommy in the hotel. Tommy is gobsmacked. Steve says he owes Tommy because he didn't want "a long-term thing with a needy chick and her three little brats." Tommy tries to punch Steve, but gets thrown down the front steps for his trouble. Tommy gets up and punches Steve, who punches him back and says he doesn't want to fight. Tommy goes after him again, and gets Tommy in a headlock and forces him to say Uncle. Steve makes with the tough talk and stomps inside. Tommy runs up and tosses a flowerpot through Steve's door, and then runs to his SUV, cackling. Steve runs out and takes a bar to Tommy's windshield, but Tommy takes off before too much damage is done.
Tommy drives down the streets of London, looking for Janet's house.
Mike leaves a message on Theresa's answering machine, apologizing for what he said the last time he called. He admits that he went out with someone else, but thought about Theresa the whole time. Mike wants to get together and talk, and Theresa picks up. Mike is happy until Theresa tells him never to call her number again, and hangs up. Garrity comes up and asks Mike to go out, but Mike angrily says that he's not interested.
Lou and Chief synchronize their watches as Garrity walks in. Garrity gives a real-time update on the battery power of his cell phone, pissing Lou off. Chief wants to recap the plan. Lou and Garrity will go to Grinch's house, and should arrive in thirty minutes. Grinch will leave work in twenty minutes, but Chief will stop him and tell him that they know about his illegitimate daughter, and that they want Tommy back in the house. If Grinch says yes, Chief will call them, and that they'll come back. If Grinch says no, Lou and Garrity will tell Grinch's wife everything. Lou doesn't think it will come to that. Garrity gives another battery life update.
Grinch wants to know how Chief found out about the situation, and begs him not to spread it around, because it could damage a lot of lives. Chief wonders what Grinch's wife would say. Grinch says his wife hates his cousin's guts anyway, and then realizes that Chief thought he had the illegitimate kid. He laughs and leaves.
Chief calls Garrity and tells them not to go into the house or talk to the wife, and that they should just turn around and go. Garrity has a bad connection, so he reports to Lou that Chief said it was a go. Lou says he doesn't like the plan now, and Garrity doesn't either. They walk up and knock on Grinch's door, and ask to speak to his wife, who invites them inside.
At the competition, the emcee introduces the Smoketeers, who are plus Carmine and minus Tommy. They sing a song about a lovers' quarrel, which continues over the montage.
Tommy drives around Ohio, looking for his family.
Mike spies on Theresa.
Lou and Garrity talk to Mrs. Grinch, who is sobbing.
Franco pops some pills and checks out his scar in the mirror.
Tommy goes into a bar and orders a shot. He sits and stares at it for a while.
Mike watches as Theresa and her new boyfriend walk down the street, arm in arm.
Lou and Garrity head out to their car. They see an SUV pull into the driveway of the house they just left. And across the street, Grinch gets out of his car. It seems that they went to the wrong house. Grinch just stares at them as Random Guy's wife slaps him in the face. Lou and Garrity haul ass out of there.
Tommy stares into his shot some more, and then sees blood dripping on his bar napkin. He looks up and sees Jesus on the cross, dripping blood, so he gathers his things and leaves without taking a drink.
Mike crawls between some cars to watch Theresa and her new boyfriend happily sitting in a diner.
Tommy arrives back at the hotel, where his crew has won a trophy. Sal is stunned at the condition of his windshield.
That night, Sal pays for some gas while Tommy snoozes in the passenger seat. Thus he is unaware that Janet pulls up at the pump. Janet pulls out and goes right, as Sal goes out and turns left, and Tommy never knows about it.