Chief is getting chewed out by his boss, The Grinch, over his hate crime. Chief tries to defend himself, saying that Teff deserved a beating because he was denigrating the men who died on September 11th by claiming they were gay. Grinch says that Chief didn't have to put the guy in a coma. Chief argues that the doctors put him in a coma, and anyway, Teff threw the first punch. For a balding guy, Chief sure is finding a lot of hairs to split. Grinch hopes that Chief has a witness, and Chief says that lots of people saw what happened, and that he's sure one of them will step up. You mean, one of the guys hanging out in a gay bar will step up to help defend someone who beat up a gay guy? Good luck with that. Grinch warns Chief that he's in big trouble, and that they might even fire him. Chief asks Grinch to "call somebody," and Grinch tells Chief to call "a good lawyer." Chief tries to defend himself some more, but Grinch doesn't want to hear it.
Lou sits at his computer and works on his horrible, horrible poetry. Here's a sample:
Crash! The sky is falling.
Crash! A shower of glass and fire!
Crash! My maker's calling
But I won't answer his heavenly choir.
Lou considers this and decides it needs another "crash" in there. Oh, Lou.
The firefighters' hockey team practices. Tommy and some guy named Ryan discuss the players, especially Probie. Tommy likes Probie, but Ryan thinks he's not a team player. Ryan wants to beat the cops in their annual hockey game this year, and Tommy says that Probie just needs some coaching. He adds that he and Ryan are co-captains, so they should make decisions together. Ryan says that he has seniority, which is why he's a captain, and that Tommy was voted into the job, so he's barely a captain at all. Which makes no sense -- you'd think Tommy would be more of a captain, since the team voted him in. Whatever. There's clearly animosity between these two. Probie skates up, and Ryan tells him to turn in his jersey and hit the locker room. Ryan leaves. Tommy yells at Probie for not passing the puck enough, and then says that he should show up for the game despite what Ryan said.
In the firehouse, Lou is trying to assure Chief that everything will be fine with his hate crime. Lou says there's so much red tape involved that it'll be months before a hearing, and by that time, the whole thing will have blown over. Lou jokes that Billy (sitting nearby) has been in a medically-induced coma for years. Billy is lost in his thoughts and misses most of the conversation, but manages to tune in just as Lou says (to Chief), "You're gonna be okay." Billy thinks Lou was talking to him, and thanks him. That will be important later.
At the ice rink, everyone is back in street clothes. One of Tommy's players complains that they need Probie on the team, and Tommy promises to work on it. His phone rings, and it's his brother, John, who says that Tommy needs to give Damien money for sending Roger that computer virus. Tommy refuses to pay Damien his requested $500, and John says that if Tommy doesn't pay, Damien's going to tell Sheila. Tommy sighs and agrees to pay. Ryan walks by and conks Tommy in the head "accidentally." John asks Tommy to call their father, because he seems strange. Tommy wants details, but John just wants Tommy to make the call.
Probie walks up to the firehouse with his hockey equipment. Andrew, the guy he saved from the fire, greets him outside, and asks when they're going to schedule their dinner. Probie tries to beg off, claiming that he's busy with his new hockey team. Andrew says he'll call week to set something up. Probie looks worried that Andrew has his phone number. Andrew wishes Probie good luck with his game, and gives him a big hug. Probie looks terrified.
Tommy calls his father, played by Charles Durning. The whole scene is subtitled to let us know what they are really saying to each other. It would be really long to list every single one, so I'll just hit the highlights. Pa Gavin says he's watching the baseball game, but really means that his wife is driving him nuts. He talks shit about some of the pitchers on the baseball game, but really means, "I miss you, I love you, and I'm very proud of you." Tommy says something innocuous which means, "I love you, too." Pa says, "Well, okay then," which really means that he wants to get off the phone. Tommy promises to call in a couple of days, which means that he wants to get off the phone too. They hang up. I thought that was a hilarious representation of how what we say to our loved ones is dripping with subtext most of the time.
Franco and Garrity watch TV in the firehouse. Probie walks in, and they ask him how practice went. Probie says it was fine, but that the captain of the team is kind of a jerk. Garrity guesses, "Tommy?" Probie says he means the other captain...and Tommy. Garrity says he likes hockey, but can't play, because he has weak ankles. Franco says, "Yeah, that's not the only thing you got that's weak." Garrity doesn't get the joke. Franco explains that he meant that Garrity has a weak mind. Garrity gets all pissy because Franco is always ripping on him. Franco spots a flyer on the bulletin board and reads it. It's an announcement for a Post Traumatic Stress Disorder seminar for anyone who wants to discuss their feelings about 9/11. Lou quickly grabs it and calls the people "a bunch of goddamn crybabies" who are "probably still broken up about the Hindenberg going down." Probie asks what the Hindenberg is, and Garrity explains that it's "one of the space shuttles." Franco just looks at him and says, "Gentlemen of the jury, I rest my case." Garrity asks with disgust, "What jury?"
Tommy walks into Jimmy and Sheila's house, calling for Damien, who walks into the kitchen. Tommy asks if Sheila is there, and Damien says she's not yet, and then seeks praise for the virus he sent Roger. Damien says he just sent a second virus through, for free. This brings him around to asking Tommy for the money. Tommy says that Damien did a great job, but that he's not getting paid. Tommy thinks it's about the principle. Since Tommy is Damien's godfather, it's his job to make sure that Damien does the right thing which, in this case, is not taking the money. Tommy tries to leave while Damien stares at him like, "Can you believe this bullshit?" Before Tommy reaches the door, Damien says he'll tell Sheila. Tommy says he'll give Damien the money in an account he can't access until he's eighteen. Damien starts to dial the phone to call his mom, and when Tommy protests, Damien explains that Tommy asked him to do something illegal, which he did, and now he wants his money. Tommy still refuses to pay. Damien threatens to tell not only Sheila, but also the cops, the fire department, and Janet. Tommy grits his teeth and gives Damien three hundred dollars. Damien says he can owe him the rest. Tommy points at Damien and says, "You know what? I was at your christening, and I didn't drown you. So let's think about who owes who."
Sheila walks in with grocery bags as Damien quickly pockets the cash and heads to his room. Tommy helps Sheila put away the groceries as they discuss their sucky lives. Tommy figures Sheila has heard all of Janet's opinions on their marriage, and Sheila says Janet doesn't really call her anymore. She hasn't talked to Janet since Christmas, but she figures Janet just doesn’t know what to say. Tommy is surprised by this. Sheila says that she has good days and bad days, but that it helps to have close friends like Lisa when she wants to spend the night "crying [her] eyes out and cursing the gods." Tommy says that sounds like his life if you replace the crying with "whiskey and black rage." Sheila asks casually if Tommy is drinking again, and Tommy denies it, claiming that he was kidding.
Lou calls Dr. Tompkins, the counselor who's in charge of the PTSD seminar. Lou explains that he's a firefighter and that he was there on 9/11. Dr. Tompkins is way too excited about this major get, and starts babbling about how incredible it would be to have someone who was actually there to come and speak to the group. Before they can discuss the arrangements further, Lou is interrupted by Garrity, and quickly hangs up the phone.
Tommy tries to fix Sheila's television, and that's not a euphemism. That will come later. Sheila asks about work, and Tommy says that the hockey game is coming up, and uses this as an opportunity to complain about Ryan. Sheila drops the news that Ryan has called her a couple of times. Tommy looks up sharply. Sheila says that Ryan asked her out, and says that he's her "only male suitor since Jimmy died." Tommy bitches that Ryan is married, but Sheila says he said he was getting divorced. Tommy thinks that's news to Ryan's wife, and calls Ryan a scumbag. Tommy gets a shock from the television, which is probably God's way of letting Tommy know that the pot is calling the kettle black. Sheila asks Tommy if he's started dating yet, and Tommy says that he hasn't, and then asks Sheila how Lisa is doing. Sheila says she's fine, and that she's out of town this week. Sheila suggests that she and Tommy go out on a date this week, like it just occurred to her. I feel like she's been planning this one for a while. I think I just hate the actress, Callie Thorne, because she ruined Homicide. Tommy isn't so sure about the date idea, but eventually agrees.
Roger's office. His secretary walks in to show him that they've been hit by another virus, and asks who he pissed off.
Garrity finds Probie and says that he looked up the Hindenberg and found out that it was a huge blimp that blew up in New Jersey. Probie says, "See? That's exactly why I'm trying to read the paper more. I miss stuff." Garrity explains that it happened "way back, like in the '30s or something." Probie is relieved that he's not so far out of the loop. They're interrupted by a guy in a suit looking for Chief.
Chief talks to the suit, and explains his side of the hate crime. The suit points out that the papers are telling a different story, and shows Chief the cover of the Post, where the headline reads, "Black Eye for FDNY, Cover-Up Suspected." The suit asks if Chief knew he was in a gay bar, and Chief denies it. The suit says that the Bureau of Investigation is gathering information, and that if a punishment is deemed necessary, Chief will have a few days to decide whether to accept or decline. Chief wonders what kind of punishment they are talking about. The suit says it could be a fine equivalent to thirty days' worth of pay. Chief thinks that's bullshit, and offers to decline it right now. The suit says that if he declines it, the case will go to trial. Chief says he doesn't care, because he's right. The suit wants a more detailed statement, and Chief tries to toss him out. The suit tells Chief that his job, future, and pension are all at stake here, and that this thing isn't going away. Chief walks out.
Dr. Tompkins prepares for his PTSD seminar when the phone rings. It's Lou, who apologizes for hanging up before. Dr. Tompkins says it would mean a lot to his group if Lou could share the emotional repercussions he's felt. Lou says he hasn't dealt with it much, but that he's written some poetry. Dr. Tompkins wants Lou to share it with the group. Lou protests that it's not that good. Dr. Tompkins asks him at least to consider it, but Lou is interrupted by Billy and hangs up. Billy babbles on about global warming and how he's losing sleep over it. Lou says he doesn't care, and walks away.
At a fire that has been put out, Lou and Franco joke that someday science will isolate the gene that gives people the idea to barbecue indoors. Meanwhile, Chief protests that he didn't know he was in a gay bar. Tommy says it's one of the most famous gay bars in Manhattan, and asks if the Chief has anyone who can testify that the other guy swung first. Chief says there were tons of witnesses, including a guy named Vinny. Tommy tells Chief he needs "a gay character witness" to prove he's not "some crazy gay-basher." Chief insists that he doesn't know any gay people, and tells Tommy to get back to work.
Lou is working on more bad poetry, reading it aloud. His wife, Phyllis, comes into the basement and complains that Lou is always on the computer, talking to himself, and he tries to hide the screen when she walks in. I am predisposed to love Phyllis because she's played by Siobhan Fallon, who went to my college, and was my commencement speaker. So we have a kinship. Anyway, Lou tells Phyllis to get a hobby and yells, "Knit something!" She thinks that he's hooked on internet porn. Lou chuckles that he's looking at a fishing site. Phyllis isn't buying it, and Lou offers to tell her the truth. Lou admits that he's been writing poetry since 9/11. Phyllis looks both confused and disgusted and says, "Oh my God. Why couldn't it have been the porn?"
A guy bursts into his lover's bedroom with a copy of the Post. He asks his lover, who was sleeping, if his dad's name is Jerry. The guy confirms it. The first guy says that the Chief beat up a gay man the other night in a bar. Chief's son grabs the paper, shocked.
Tommy hangs out on his patio, shooting at a squirrel who's eating through his roof. My dog is so behind that idea. He nearly had a heart attack this morning because there was a SQUIRREL in the BIRD FEEDER! I can't even talk about the day that a squirrel somehow got onto our screened-in porch. My dog nearly pooped himself. Anyway, Sheila walks up, angry, and shows Tommy the money she found in Damien's underwear drawer. It's the money Tommy paid him. Tommy tells her to calm down, and seems about to confess, but instead says that there must be a reasonable explanation. Sheila thinks Damien is dealing drugs. Tommy is sure that's not it, but when Sheila asks where else he would get the money, Tommy agrees with her. Sheila wants to go home and beat her son's ass, but Tommy says he'll take care of it. Sheila starts crying and says that she wishes Jimmy were there. Tommy agrees, and says he'll talk to Damien first thing in the morning.
Sheila bums a smoke from Tommy. She asks if it feels like the whole world is falling to pieces. Tommy feels the same way: "Everything that's good and fun is just sliding away, you know? Jimmy, all the good times we used to have down at the firehouse. That's all changed. Come home here and dealing with this shit across the street. I just feel like everything good in my life is just sliding away and there's nothing I can do about it." Sheila looks at Tommy with disgust and asks, "How big a pussy are you? I had something taken away from me. My husband. But the things you want, they're here. All you have to do is fight for them. Grow a pair of balls, why don't you?" On the one hand, be more self-absorbed, Sheila. On the other hand, she's kind of right. As she walks off, Jimmy stares at her from inside the house.
Tommy walks into his kitchen. He opens the cabinet and starts throwing all of his liquor bottles into the garbage. Jimmy shows up and says that Sheila still looks good. Tommy protests that he doesn't look at her that way. Jimmy asks what he's doing, and Tommy says he's "stopping the slide." He takes the bag full of bottles outside to the trash barrel.
Tommy and his kids are hanging out at his house. Tommy is on the phone. Colleen reaches for something in an upper cabinet, revealing a tattoo on her hipbone. Tommy spots it and gets off the phone to ask her what it is. Colleen says it's just a tiny one. She shows him the tattoo, which is a shamrock with the initials SM inside. She says that he's always telling them to be proud of their Irish heritage. Tommy tells her, "You want to be Irish? Wave a flag, march in a parade, have a hundred kids. Not yet." The other two kids come over to check it out. Tommy tells them to eat dinner in front of the TV, even though they're not usually allowed, and they run off. Tommy inspects the tattoo and asks Colleen if she's into S&M. She doesn't know what that is. Tommy asks whose initials they are, and Colleen refuses to tell him. Connor reveals that the initials stand for Shawn Murphy. Colleen doesn't think it's a big deal, because Janet has a tattoo on her butt. Tommy wonders how Colleen knows that, and Colleen says that Janet showed her. Tommy tells Colleen to get rid of the tattoo. Colleen protests that it's her body, and that he can't tell her what to do with it. Tommy says that she can move out when she's eighteen, but until then, she lives under his roof so she plays by his rules, which means no tattoos. Colleen snots that she wasn't living under his roof when she got it, because she was at Janet's house. Tommy isn't having it. Their argument is interrupted by the phone ringing. It's Janet, with horrible timing. She apologizes for asking for a favor, and says that there's a pipe leaking in the kitchen and Roger is coming over for dinner. Tommy asks why Roger can't fix it, and Janet says he's not good with tools. Tommy snarks, "That's funny, seeing as how he is one." Tommy promises to come over, and snaps at Colleen to watch her siblings.
Phyllis asks Lou what he's going to do with his poems. Lou says he wasn't planning to do anything, but then adds that Dr. Tompkins asked him to read them at the PTSD seminar. Lou admits that he's thinking about doing it, but that he doesn’t know if his poems are any good or not. Phyllis says he shouldn't read them if they suck, because he'll look like a big jerk. It cracks me up how you would expect a wife to be all supportive that Lou is opening up and revealing his emotions, and instead she's like, "You're kind of a pussy and it's ruining our marriage." Lou says he just wants someone (hint hint) to read the poems and tell him if they're no good. Phyllis doesn't want to do it. Lou says that he doesn't have anyone else to ask, because no one else knows about the poems. Phyllis says, "I'm not good with poetry. It's too fancy." Hee! Perfect line delivery. Lou asks her again to read it.
Tommy fixes Janet's pipes (not a euphemism) as she says that she didn't show her tattoo to Colleen. Instead, Colleen walked in while Janet was getting dressed and saw it. Janet thinks her tattoo (a heart with Tommy's initials in it) should be a deterrent to Colleen's interest in body art anyway.
Shawn Murphy throws pebbles at a window. Colleen comes to the window and smiles. They both move to meet up somewhere.
Tommy tells Janet about how Sheila said Janet never calls. Janet thinks Sheila is a bitch, who treated Janet like shit when she started dating Tommy, and was barely civil to her later on. Janet thinks that Sheila can kiss her "tight Irish ass," and adds that "her and all the other two-faced hypocrite broads like her are one of the main reasons I can't wait to get out of this neighborhood." That little speech did not sound like something Janet would say. It sounded like something Tommy would say. Tommy thinks Janet doesn't like Sheila because she's Italian. She's Italian with a name like "Sheila"?
Janet asks if her pipes are fixed, and Tommy says they're not. Janet panics because there are towels all over the floor and the tablecloth is still in the dryer. She begs Tommy not to leave before she gets back, and runs off to fetch the tablecloth. Tommy sighs and starts eating some celery. He spots a pad with some phone numbers on the top page, so he rips it off and stuffs it in his pocket. Janet returns and asks about the sink. Tommy says it's not fixed, but that it won't leak, and that he can get the part from a friend of Franco's tomorrow. Janet thanks Tommy and gives him a kiss. Tommy seems to consider this, then walks up behind Janet and starts putting the moves on. Janet asks what he's doing. Tommy can only say, "I...I fixed the sink." Roger shows up just then, and Janet welcomes him. Tommy says he can't stay for dinner because he has stuff to do. Roger looks miffed as Tommy walks out.
Phyllis reads Lou's poems and says, "Oh my God." Lou pops out from behind the wall and asks what she thinks. Phyllis says she's not done yet, and tells him to go away.
Tommy uses binoculars to watch Janet and Roger fight, and grins, "Secret evil plan: one. Roger: nothing." Behind him, Shawn Murphy comes down the stairs, clearly not expecting Tommy to be home. Tommy thinks it's Jimmy, but when he turns and spots Shawn, he takes off after him. Tommy chases Shawn outside. Roger leaves Janet's house just as Tommy tackles Shawn in Janet's yard. Roger pulls Tommy off the kid and asks what he's doing. A neighbor asks if she should call the cops, and Janet tells her everything is fine. Roger says this is crazy, and that he's leaving. Janet tries to convince Roger to stay as Tommy reports that Shawn was at his house with Colleen. Roger takes off A dog starts barking, and another neighbor asks if everything is okay. Janet sighs that she hates this neighborhood. Tommy asks what he should do about Colleen, and Janet tells him to send her home. Tommy walks back to his house, but first he stops and digs some of the liquor bottles out of the trash can.
Phyllis is crying as she finishes reading. Lou says it's pretty powerful stuff, and Phyllis replies, "Oh, [Lou], it's awful." Lou thinks she's talking about the imagery, but Phyllis says that the poems themselves are awful. Lou tries to make excuses, but Phyllis tells him that he can't show them to anybody. Lou says that it's how he's learned how to express himself about the things that he's seen, and that he thought she'd be happy that he's able to open up and share. Phyllis says she doesn't need him to share or open up, and that she doesn't want to hear about dead babies and people burning. She likes it when they drink red wine and eat cookies and watch television. She smiles, "I love you the way you are. So I'll get rid of these." Lou looks devastated.
Chief's house. Chief's wife walks down some stairs with his dress uniform. She says that he's missing a button, and that she'll fix it in the morning. She asks if he's coming to bed, and he says he'll be there in a minute. Chief waits until she's gone and then walks over and stares at his uniform. He notes all the medals on it, and then starts crying.
It's the NYPD vs. FDNY hockey game. The cops are winning, six to one. Tommy complains to Ryan that he has to put Probie in, because they have no speed on their team. They take a vote, and everyone wants to put Probie in, but Ryan isn't having it. As Ryan skates off, Tommy seems to remember something about him. Tommy goes out onto the ice and starts a fight with Ryan. The ref isn't sure what to do, since they're on the same team. Tommy beats the crap out of Ryan until some of his teammates pull him off. Tommy's parting words are, "You call Sheila again, you're a dead man. Scumbag."
Chief pulls his car up outside of the gay bar, and lights a cigar.
Tommy uses his cell phone to call the numbers he found on the paper in Janet's house. They're numbers from real estate agents. The one he calls first is located in Wichita, Kansas. Tommy is shocked.
Chief spots Vinny, his prime witness, exiting the gay bar. He walks over and speaks to him. Vinny says there are twenty or thirty guys inside who'd like to kick his ass. Chief says that he didn't come there looking for a fight the other night, or now. Chief knows that Vinny and some others saw Teff throw the first punch. Chief wonders if they would serve as witnesses for him. Vinny says that the funny thing about gay-bashers is that they're all tough guys until they get caught. That's not really funny, is it? Vinny says that he and every other guy in the place saw Chief throw the first punch. Chief looks distraught.
Tommy drinks a beer in his living room and talks to Jimmy. He wonders why Janet chose Kansas. Jimmy wonders if Tommy's planning on going there, and Tommy says he's not leaving. Jimmy is relieved and explains that he's stuck there, and wouldn't be able to leave with Tommy. Tommy says he's got enough worries without being responsible for his cousin's ghost. Jimmy can't believe Tommy feels that way after everything Jimmy's done. Tommy wonders what Jimmy has done for him. Jimmy says he listens to Tommy bitch and moan, and babysits his demons. Tommy tells Jimmy to go haunt someone else, and suggests that he take the other ghosts with him. Tommy yells at Jimmy to get out just as Chief walks in. Tommy says he was yelling at the game on TV, and offers Chief a drink.
Chief and Tommy sit at the table with beers. Tommy tries to find out why Chief is there. Chief talks about his father, who was a cop. His father retired so that he could travel with Chief's mother, but three days into his retirement, he tried to blow his head off with his service revolver. Tommy is shocked. Chief says that his father missed, though, and that the two of them were in the hospital. Chief asked his father why he did this after busting his ass for thirty-nine years and finally getting free. His father said he couldn't live without his family. Chief thought he meant his wife and kids, but his father meant the guys on the job. Tommy doesn't look shocked to hear this. Chief starts crying and asks, "What have I done? Jesus Christ, what have I done?" Tommy has no smart answers this time.
Tommy sees Chief to the door and promises that everything will be fine. Tommy walks back into the house and sees Jimmy there. Jimmy promises that he'll always be there. Tommy doesn't seem very comforted by that. He turns out the lights and pours himself a tall glass of whiskey, and then heads upstairs to bed.