Vanessa welcomes us to the show, and who the hell is Vanessa? I mean, I had heard of La La before she hosted, but I have never seen this chick in my life. She introduces the roommates, all of whom look exactly the same except for Robin, Charlie, and Frankie. Robin's hair is a lot longer and a lot blonder. Charlie's skin has cleared up and his hair looks less greasy. Frankie. Oh, dear. Frankie is either wearing a wig, or she has dyed her hair black with gray, magenta, and blue highlights. And she's cut those really short bangs that very, very few people can pull off. And she's wearing a leopard-print pillbox hat. And a leopard-print choker. She's trying so hard that she's practically sweating. I'll just say at the top that this is going to be difficult to recap because they all talk over each other constantly, but I'll do my best!
Vanessa opens by asking what it's like for them to be back together. They all say it's natural and that there's a good vibe. Frankie says that it's comfortable, despite the fact that it will shortly be revealed that everyone kind of hates her.
Vanessa introduces a clip package of hookups. We get to see Cameran and Brad in the bathroom, Andrea's visit, the camping hookup, and the kiss in the hot tub. Vanessa asks if it ever went further than making out. Cameran swears that it didn't. Brad says that it was a difficult situation, but doesn't explain further. Vanessa asks specifically about the bathroom incident, and Cameran explains that she peed in the toilet while Brad peed in the trashcan. Classy. Cameran says that she didn't think Brad would try to hook up with her in there. Frankie says that they all thought something was going down. Brad says it wasn't a big deal because he didn't "pull it out." Randy thinks that peeing in front of someone is more intimate than kissing. Word, Randy. Vanessa asks if it was weird to hang out with Brad's girlfriend. Cameran says she tried to think of Andrea as "just some ho" and Brad tells her that it's harsh. Brad says that he and Andrea are actually not even friends now, due to the show and some things he found out when he got home. Way to out her as a cheater on national television, Brad.
Vanessa introduces the Randy and Robin clip package. We see them shower together, the infamous "Boom! Bazooka Joe!" incident, Robin fighting with Randy in a cab, and Robin drunkenly falling out of bed. Vanessa asks what in the hell the Bazooka Joe thing means. Randy says that he thought they could have private conversations if a camera wasn't there, so they were trying to talk about their relationship without triggering the appearance of a camera person. And they referred to the camera person as "Bazooka Joe" and that's what he was talking about. That actually makes a lot more sense than anything I came up with, so I'll buy it. Robin says that they just cuddled all the time. Randy says that they were compatible, and Robin adds that she went psycho. They both accept responsibility for what happened, and then hug. Where is the yelling and screaming? These people are way too functional for this show. Vanessa asks if Robin and Mike are still together. Robin says that Mike's been in Iraq since February and asks everyone to pray for him, and adds that she and Mike have stayed in contact. Brad adds that Mike was a great guy, and Robin refers to him as "the eighth roommate" before realizing that it would be ninth now. Charlie cracks, "Mike got more airtime than I did," and everyone laughs. Because it's true.
Vanessa introduces the Frankie hookup package. We see Frankie and Brad snuggling, Frankie telling Dave that she blacked out, Frankie rubbing up on Randy, Frankie making out with Adam, and Dave whipping Frankie when he came to visit. Frankie confirms that she and Dave are still together, although they had lots of long talks and fights. Vanessa asks what the roommates think about Frankie and Dave, and Cameran calls it "a unique relationship" because "they do stuff that I don't even, I mean." Frankie just laughs. So what? Are they into S&M? Role-playing? What? Frankie chastises Cameran for going there. Jacquese diplomatically says that it's "a different kind of relationship" that "keeps the love going." Anal sex? I'm seriously at a loss here.
Vanessa asks what Jacquese thought of all the hooking up, since he was the self-proclaimed "bootyologist." Cameran reveals that Jacquese hooked up all the time, but managed to do it off-camera. Jacquese can't believe they brought it up. Robin explains that Jacquese got a lot of alone time away from the cameras, and that no one knows what really happened. Jacquese explains that without cameras, he could figure out if people were genuinely interested in him and not the cameras.
After the break, Vanessa asks Robin and Brad if they freak out when they hear sirens now, which introduces the clips of Brad and Robin getting arrested on the same night. Randy thinks it was hilarious that they walked by Robin's squad car, but Brad doesn't think it was a big deal. Vanessa brings up Randy's drunken stupor that night, and Randy says that he doesn't know how he escaped being arrested for public intoxication. Vanessa says that Brad was in the drunk tank twice on the show, and asks how many times it's happened in his life. Brad says it's not a fair question, because he doesn't consider it getting arrested. Brad adds that people were screaming shit at him because of the cameras, but that part was never really shown. Randy thinks the cops should have been controlling the crowds instead of arresting Brad. Frankie adds that she can't believe she and Randy weren't arrested instead. Yeah, Randy already said that, but thanks for showing up, Frankie. Robin says they didn't show her trying to apologize to the Marine, where she tapped him on the head to get his attention and he pushed her hand down. That's where the alleged scratch came from. Robin thought the whole situation was taken care of, so she went into the club and got drunk, and then walked out into an episode of Cops. Vanessa asks Cameran if she felt guilty for causing the situation. Robin immediately says that it wasn't Cameran's fault. Robin says that everyone made fun of her for trying to demonstrate on the copwhat happened with the Marine. Vanessa asks Cameran again if she felt responsible, and Cameran says that she didn't, and that Robin definitely took on the "mother figure" role, which Cameran appreciated. Jacquese says that when Robin called, she was talking smack to the guards. Robin says that the cops were laughing at her, and Jacquese agrees that the cops were bullying her because she was on television.
Vanessa brings up how Frankie kind of came on to Randy that night, and says that Frankie was passed out on top of Randy. Frankie explains that as soon as she passed out, Randy scooted out of the bed. Robin says that, at the time, she and Randy had a thing going on, and she wonders what Frankie was trying to do. Frankie says that she was so drunk that she would have hooked up with anything or anyone, and uses Jamie as an example. Charlie, who is sitting between Frankie and Jamie, tries to make them hold hands. Jamie looks pissed! She pulls her hand away. I wonder what's up with that. Vanessa asks Jacquese what he was thinking that night. Jacquese wondered what he had signed up for, and Randy was making up all these scenarios where Brad was getting beat up in a back room. Jacquese concludes that once they found out Brad was okay, they just wanted to get Robin out of jail. Robin expresses thanks to Jamie and Jacquese for trying to pay her bail, which she didn't know about until she saw the episode. Jacquese brings up how Randy took a cab to pick Robin up from jail for no reason. Randy says that he slept for six hours and was still too drunk to drive. Robin says that she appreciated seeing a familiar face. Randy says that Robin would have done the same, and Brad cracks that she wouldn't have, and everyone laughs. It's nice to see that, for the most part, these guys actually still get along.
Vanessa brings up the Greece trip, and says that it wasn't very relaxing. We see clips of Frankie pouting (there are too many instances to link them all), Robin and Cameran's argument, Frankie's continued instigation, and Brad and Randy yelling at Frankie. Frankie starts out by saying that she had a blast in Greece, and her roommates all laugh and say that's bullshit. Frankie tells them to look at the photos they took, and Robin says that Frankie didn't even take her photos home with her. Jamie says that even before they left, Frankie was complaining about it. Frankie agrees that she was in a negative state of mind, but that she thought they would go to Hawaii or something. She didn't want to go somewhere that would be all about partying. Because Hawaii is a dry state? What the fuck is she talking about? Frankie claims that she was happy. Robin says that Frankie's negative vibes and wicked looks were hurtful. Cameran doesn't think Frankie allowed herself to have a good time, and Frankie agrees. Frankie says that just because she wasn't partying doesn't mean that she didn't have fun, and that she had decided to cut back on her drinking before the trip. Cameran brings up how Frankie said she'd rather be there with Dave. Robin says she really tried to extend her friendship to Frankie, and Frankie agrees that she has a problem accepting that. Everything they say, Frankie has a ready answer for, and she's not even listening to what they are talking about. I do like that Vanessa is letting them talk things out instead of immediately interrupting to move on to the package of clips that we've already seen.
Jacquese says he has something to say that he's wanted to say for a long time. He says that the chemistry after Charlie joined them was very different than when Frankie was there. He adds that he's kept in touch with everyone but Frankie, because she doesn't get in touch with him, even though he loves her to death. Jacquese says he really reached out to Frankie, and then she turned around and said she hated all of her roommates. Jacquese thinks that Frankie came into the experience expecting them to hate her because she was different, and that wasn't the case. Jacquese concludes that he's always there for her. Robin adds that she feels the same way, and that she tried to bring Frankie gifts or talk to her and was continually rebuffed. Robin says that she's never hated anyone, but that when Frankie left, she threw Frankie's things into the ocean because she had a lot of hate stored up. Robin adds that Frankie emailed her an apology, and that Robin feels like they are square now.
Vanessa brings up the fight between Randy and Frankie. Randy says that the feelings built up for a while, and that he tried to empathize with Frankie, but that she didn't show him any respect. Frankie says the reason she brought the issue up at that moment was that she overheard Robin calling her a bitch just before that. Robin admits that she probably did. Frankie says it's not a big deal, but she still keeps talking about it. Frankie launches into a long, boring story about that night that is totally irrelevant, so Vanessa tries to go to a break. Frankie says that she has more to say about it, and Vanessa promises that they'll get to it.
When they return, Vanessa introduces the subject of why Frankie left the house. We see a clip package of Frankie crying to Brad, crying to her mother, insisting that everyone hates her, leaving, and then telling Cameran that she's "a little too punk rock" for the show. Frankie laughs about it, but Cameran isn't laughing at all. Frankie says that she was joking about the punk rock thing, because her friends made fun of her for being the rebel of the show. Vanessa asks if she really came home because of Dave, or because of her roommates. Frankie says that it wasn't because of her roommates; it was because she hated herself. Robin says that she had a hard time too, but she worked through it, and she thinks Frankie should have too. Brad thinks it was hard for everyone. Cameran thinks Frankie expected them not to accept her. Frankie says she expected things of herself, and let herself down.
Frankie starts crying as she says that she thought she did have six best friends from the situation. How can she watch the clips where she says that she hates them all and doesn't need them in her life, and then expect them to want to be her friends? She is so self-absorbed. Everyone tries to reassure Frankie, but she's not hearing it. Frankie says that if she hadn't left, they wouldn't have met Charlie. Everyone tries to explain some more, but Frankie talks over them to cry some more about how no one understands her. Bleh. Jacquese reminds her that he wanted her to be happy, but that they feel like their love for her isn't returned. Frankie says that it wasn't their problems that made her leave, and that she's watched herself and realized that she has to deal with problems. Robin wants to exchange phone numbers right there. Frankie says that when she came back to shoot promos, she wanted to show them how much she cared, and that they went to dinner and only Cameran asked for her phone number. Oh, what the fuck ever. Brad insists that he did ask for it. Jacquese points out that after he heard Frankie say that she hated him, he wasn't too excited to go out of his way to be in her life. Frankie says that she emailed him three times. Jacquese says that after watching the show, he didn't even know what to say to her. Jamie finally speaks up and says that she thought she and Frankie would be good friends, especially after the cutting situation, but after watching what Frankie said to the cameras, Jamie really had her feelings hurt.
The roommates all agree that Frankie is a good person. Frankie says that she's changed, and that she had to go home because she knew that she'd screwed up so badly that she couldn't fix it. Why can't she just say she's sorry that she said she hated all of them, and that it's what she felt in the moment, but that she regrets saying it because she doesn't hate them? And that she understands if they don't feel like being her friend now, but that she hopes they'll give her another chance? Instead, she is so defensive, and just trying to explain everything away as to why it's not really her fault, and she's just messed up, and they don't understand. Apologize for hurting them. It'll go a long way. Everyone else says that it's never too late to fix it. Randy offers to help Frankie to see why she's great. Oh, believe me. Frankie already thinks that she's great, but she knows that appearing vulnerable makes people give her a pass for shitty behavior. Charlie gives Frankie a hug and says that even he loves her. Robin says that she and Frankie had a lot in common, and that Frankie didn't even realize it. Frankie says that the things she hated in Robin were the things she hated in herself. Brad suggests that they go back to the house and fix their relationships, and everyone agrees.
Vanessa brings up Charlie's arrival, and says that he had a hard time fitting in at first. We see a clip package featuring Charlie's arrival, Charlie's slacking, the non-bonus situation, and the guitar breaking. And that's pretty much all the screen time that Charlie had. Charlie says that the whole girlfriend situation was a bad idea. They all laugh that Charlie told the girl he loved her. Charlie admits that he's not with the girl anymore, and Jacquese says that they broke up the week. Randy says that he advised Charlie to get to know his roommates in the short time he had. Cameran says that she wanted the money, because they were forced to drink malt liquor. Brad says that had nothing to do with money. Cameran claims that she didn't try to break the guitar, and everyone laughs. Charlie says that Cameran offered to pay for it, and that he's still waiting for the money, and everyone laughs some more. Charlie says that he still feels like the new guy, but that everyone welcomed him with open arms.
Vanessa brings up their job, and we see a clip package of how much they all complained about the job, and even wanted to quit at one point. Then Robin and Cameran purposely fell in the water to get out of a day's work, and Detective Jamie figured it out. Cameran immediately says that she hated the job because it was manual labor. Frankie adds that they got in trouble for laughing. Robin says that it was interesting learning the job, but Jacquese says that even that was boring. Brad says that people were always asking them about the show, and that they weren't allowed to say anything, and that their boss wanted them to tell those people about the harbor instead. Jacquese says that "the sailing community of San Diego" thought they didn't deserve to be on the boat. Cameran admits that it was her idea to jump in the water, and Jacquese thinks they pulled it off really well. Robin says that the producers heard them talking and advised them to take their microphones off before they jumped in. Jacquese says that he called them because they were supposed to come back to work. Vanessa asks about the quitting incident. Jacquese says that he said he would quit if it was about Frankie's health. Frankie says that she hated it like everyone else did, and I'm annoyed that Vanessa doesn't ask if Frankie is taking her medicine now, or if she could really get pneumonia if she was out in the cold, or if she's quit smoking.
Vanessa brings up an unaired trip to Mexico, and shows some footage of that time. Everyone gets drunk. Cameran says she'd like to get to know Randy a little better. Jamie says that she'd like to know Brad better. The girls find the boys. Robin slurs that Cameran is trying to hook up with Randy, as Randy puts Cameran into her bed. Robin tells Brad that Jamie wants to sleep with him. Robin puts it right out there: "Jamie wants to fuck you before she leaves." The camera finds Jamie and Brad flirting, having possibly just kissed, but they walk away before anything interesting happens. Robin says that Jamie really said she wanted to hook up with Brad. Jamie says that she never said she wanted to fuck him. Robin tries to get Jamie to admit that she said she wanted to lay him. Jamie is blushing madly. Brad says that it was Robin's craziest night. Jacquese says that Robin had a big mouth. Vanessa asks if the camera busted them making out. Jamie says that there's no evidence of anything. Frankie says that Jamie and Brad almost kissed another time, and Jacquese agrees. Vanessa gets Jamie to admit that she wanted to hook up with Brad.
Robin says that she made up the whole thing about Cameran and Randy in her own head, because Cameran is more Randy's physical type. Robin adds that Randy likes them young. Randy doesn't think he has a type, but that was the type of girl he happened to meet, and adds that some of them had "dental problems." Randy apologizes to Erin, and Jacquese says that Erin brought it on herself by taking her teeth out on national television. Vanessa asks if the guys were trying to lose the girls in Mexico, and Jacquese admits that they were, but that it didn't work. And with the final question asked, that wraps it up!