Previously on The Real World: Irulan and Arissa yelled at Frank, and Frank said that he didn't want to get involved in drama. Is it even possible to be on this show and not get involved in drama? Marc, the boss for the season, told the roommates that their job would be to throw parties. Irulan thought that Marc could become a really good friend. Why? He's grody.
You all assume that there are just a million shots of people gambling every week and I don't mention it because there are a million of them, right? Cool. Arissa and Irulan (I just wrote Irissa and Arulan, which is kind of appropriate since I can finally tell those two apart, but they're always together so it doesn't really matter) have drinks with Marc. Who is grody. There is just not a more appropriate word for him than that. He's double-chinned; needs a shave -- and not in a sexy stubble way, but in a coming-off-a-three-day-bender way; wears yellow glasses that make him look like he's in the advanced stages of liver failure (and the bloating's not helping matters); and to top it off (literally) he's wearing a black stocking cap, but doesn't have it pulled down far enough, so it looks like his head is gigantic, which it may be. In an interview, Irulan says that Marc is her best boss "to date." She clarifies that she doesn't mean she wants to date him. She meant up until this point.
Marc asks about Arisssa's boyfriend, and she says he's named Dario. Marc asks if Dario is a hottie, like, does he want to hook up with him? Because she can't stand someone else getting attention, Irulan tosses out that her boyfriend is a hottie. Marc jokes that all of Irulan's other boyfriends are hotties, too. In an interview, Irulan reminds us that she and Gabe (her boyfriend) have an open relationship, and she describes what they have as "a 'don't ask, don't tell' policy." Because that's working out so well with the gays in the military. Also, isn't she kind of violating that by being on this show? He might not ask, but I'm sure by watching the show, he is essentially being told. Irulan says that she's not worried about it, because she knows that no other woman could be better than her, because she and Gabe "have love." Arissa looks at Irulan like she's nuts, which earns Arissa some points in my book. You know, in my mind, if you truly love each other, you really won't be interested in dating other people. And if you're interested in dating other people, then the two of you shouldn't be together right now. Neither option is wrong, but it doesn't make sense to me to try to have both at the same time. But I'm big into monogamy, so what do I know from open relationships? In an interview, Irulan says that no one understands her open relationship. Could that be because it doesn't make sense? Irulan says that her boyfriend asked her not to hook up with anyone in the house. Marc points out that he's not in the house, and invites Irulan to come watch porn with him, then asks her to sit in his lap. Do those pickup lines actually work for him? I guess his job might get him some chicks, but again, the grody factor overrides it for me. Marc says that he's trying to give Irulan bedroom eyes. Irulan giggles some more.
Frank talks to a friend on the phone. He says that the other roommates make him look like the Pope. I could make a Pope joke here, but I think that dude's got enough problems right now. Frank says that Arissa is a dork, and she yells at him to stop calling her names. In an interview, Frank says that he and Arissa joke around, and that Arissa pretends to get mad when she's really not. Frank says something about how he "made this black chick mad, and she's totally going to beat me up." Why does it matter that she's black? Does he think that black chicks are more likely to beat him up? I think Frank has some issues he needs to examine. Arissa just continues to do the dishes. Frank pretends he's yelling at Arissa, "You're the bitchy black chick, okay? Accept your position." Weird editing there in that we didn't actually see Frank while those words were being said, and they sounded like they were taken out of context. I'm just saying. Now, I took that to mean that he was telling Arissa that her role on the show was going to be as the bitchy black chick, a title she inherits from such former roommates as Tami, Kameelah, and Coral. I'm not saying those women are bitches. I'm just saying that they are black, and during their seasons, they were often portrayed as being bitchy. We all know that there are Real World archetypes by now, and one of them is the bitchy black chick. Like Frank is the naïve sheltered dork from a small town (see also: Jon, London Mike, NY2 Mike). But Arissa -- probably due to her past experiences -- doesn't see it that way. In an interview, Arissa says, "He says, 'You're the black bitch of the house. That's your role. You play the role of the black bitch.' I'm very pissed. I'm offended." So unless Frank said something similar that we didn't see at another point, she didn't hear it exactly as it was said. Which is always the root of a good blow-out. (See also: Survivor Thailand.)
Irulan and Marc hang out alone in the VIP section of Rain. In an interview, Irulan says, "I think that when someone is your boss, and has a position of power over you, there tends to be a sort of weird attraction." Maybe for her. I have seriously never had that happen. Either I respect and admire my boss, or I think my boss is an idiot, but I've never been attracted to my boss, especially not just because he or she was my boss. (Sorry, Wing.) ["Your mouth says no, but your eyes say yes." -- Wing Chun] Marc plays with Irulan's feet. She tells him to leave her shoes on, because her feet are sensitive. Marc asks if she's ticklish, while still playing with her feet. Irulan says that she just said they were sensitive, and he asks if she enjoys that activity. Ewwww. He's grody to the max. In an interview, Irulan says that she doesn't think that Marc is good-looking, nor that he has a great body. Join the club. But she adds that she does feel some attraction to him. She had me and then she lost me. In the club, Marc tickles Irulan's waist, and she ends up with her legs across his lap, practically lying down. She asks if they should recline completely. He notes that they have the whole VIP section to themselves. Marc's phone rings, and it's on vibrate. He puts it on Irulan's stomach, and she urges him to put it lower and lower. I feel grody now.
Elsewhere in the bar, Frank and Brynn discuss Marc. Frank asks where Marc is, and Brynn says that he's picking someone up. I'd like to note that while I approve of the fairly recently added Non-Squiggly Font of Introduction, the new Comic Sans Font of Captioning really, really sucks. First of all, it's like 30 points high, and takes up half of the screen. And second of all, it's Comic Sans, which is my font nemesis. Seriously, I've told friends that I can't accept their emails if they insist on using Comic Sans in their signatures. In case you were wondering, if Comic Sans is the President of Shitty Fonts, then Times New Roman is the Vice-President. I know. I have problems. Anyway, this whole scene is subtitled in Comic Sans, so I'm going to breeze through it as quickly as possible. Marc and Irulan decide to go to Marc's room and hang out for a while. Brynn and Frank drunkenly discuss how Marc is cool, but he's really trying to get with all of the female roommates.
In an interview, Irulan says that they ended up in Marc's room, and there was a big bed and nowhere else to sit. Irulan wants to watch television, and Marc says that they should watch porn. Okay, this is the point where Irulan should leave if she doesn't want anything to happen. Not that it would be her fault if anything did happen, but the smart girl realizes when the situation starts to take a wrong turn. In an interview, Frank says that he respects Marc, but that he's disappointed that he's trying to hook up with all of the female roommates. Brynn tells Frank that she told Marc he could buy her all the drinks he wants to, but that nothing would ever happen between them. Which is exactly the way to handle it -- nip it in the bud. I can't believe I just complimented Brynn on her good judgment. Has the world gone mad, people? In an interview, Irulan says that Marc turned out the lights, and somehow they ended up under the covers. Was there a bedding-related accident? Jesus, take some responsibility for your actions. Irulan giggles and rubs Marc's face as she tells him to get his hand out of there, because he's going to get her in trouble. Note that she doesn't tell him she doesn't want his hand there. And she's giggling while she says it. In an interview, Irulan says that Marc is a man, and he assumes that because she's in his bed, he's going to get some. Well, he shouldn't assume that, but based on the fact that she laid on top of him in the bar and made suggestive comments, and then watched porn with him under the covers, and then giggled and flirted and never told him she wasn't interested in him, I can see how he might get that idea. Believe me, I'm the last person who would blame the victim, but for that to happen, there needs to be a victim to blame, and Irulan is no victim at this point.
That Steve Madden commercial freaks me right the fuck out.
Back in the room, Irulan is now saying, "Come on! Come on, you're my boss." But she's still laughing about it. Marc seems to be grabbing her and holding her in the bed, which is shitty. In an interview, Irulan says she wondered how she got there. It's 4:57 AM. Irulan says that she's going to go, and that it's probably a good thing. Marc asks if he's invited up to her place. In an interview, Irulan says that she told him he was invited if he wanted to come. Okay, so I think that scene was Irulan realizing that (a) Marc wanted more out of it than she did and (b) she was rapidly becoming sober and it wasn't fun anymore. I've been there. But what you do in those situations is just leave and work out the details later, not invite the dude to spend more time with you.
Back up at the suite, Arissa sits in bed and drinks water. Frank is on the phone with someone (at 5:00 AM). In an interview, Arissa says that Frank runs off at the mouth a lot, and she thinks he has said twice that her role is the black bitch. Okay, so he apparently did say it another time that we didn't see. Arissa says that she's going to tell him to knock it off, and explain why she didn't like it.
Marc and Irulan return to the suite, where everyone is still awake. Well, it is Vegas. Irulan has serious bed head. In an interview, Steven says he thought Marc and Irulan were just enjoying each other's company, but didn't see anything romantic about it. Marc sprays Irulan's back with water, then carries her around the room. Then she jokes that she's going to crush him with her thighs, and puts her legs around his head. Yeah, she really wants nothing to do with him. I can't imagine why he'd think she was giving him the green light, there. In the bathroom, Irulan tells Marc to go and get in bed with Arissa, who appears to be asleep. Marc walks in, and when he goes to touch her, Arissa tells him to leave her alone. In an interview, Arissa says that she feels "extremely sketchy about [Marc]." Good instincts, girl. Marc leans over and oozes, "Is that any way to talk to your boss?" Ew. What a sleaze. In an interview, Arissa says, "Sketchball proceeds to slide up my comforter and slide into my bed." She adds that she was naked and didn't want him in there, and told him so. Irulan also slides into Arissa's bed. Looks like Irulan was looking for some threeway action. Arissa yells and keeps calling Irulan and Marc freaks, and yells at them to get out of her bed. They do, and Irulan tells Marc that he needs to persevere because Arissa really wants them. Marc and Irulan head over to Irulan's bed. They giggle together, and Irulan says that Marc is staying over. Arissa turns over in her bed, seemingly disgusted.
At 6:00 AM, Irulan tells Marc that he needs to go. Keep in mind that, according to the editors, this is less than an hour after the scene. In an interview, Irulan says that she feels uncomfortable with Marc, because he's making comments to let her know that she could take it further if she wanted. You think? I only got that vibe from him, like, six hours earlier! Irulan asks him if he's sleeping there, and he says no. She asks if he's sure. She asks if he's sure! She's claiming in the interviews that she wanted him to leave, and that she was uncomfortable the whole time, but now we see her pretty much asking him to stay longer. She has had plenty of opportunities to ditch him, and hasn't taken them. In an interview, Irulan says that because Marc is her boss, she's not as assertive as she should be. Oh, bull freaking shit. She is not that woman that Mike Tyson raped in his hotel room. She's continued flirting with him, even after he started exhibiting behavior that she now claims made her uncomfortable. She invited him back to her place. She told him to get into bed with Arissa. She asked him to sleep there. As far as we know, Arissa is still in the room with them, and at the very least, her other roommates are still in the suite -- not to mention the tons of cameras on them. She knows that she's not in any real danger, and if she wanted to say no, or if God forbid he started forcing himself on her, she could get out of it. I think her problem is that she's realizing she made a mistake and is now trying to spin it by playing the boss angle to explain away her behavior instead of just taking some fucking responsibility for her own actions. I just get so upset by this because when women like Irulan won't take responsibility for their actions, it cheapens the claims of people who were actual victims of sexual harassment and sexual assault.
Deep breath. Anyway, Irulan starts trying to get Marc to look at a picture of her boyfriend. He won't, but then she tricks him into looking. In an interview, Irulan says that she doesn't feel comfortable saying she wants him to leave her alone and get his hands off her, and maybe that's what needs to be said. You think? Irulan starts getting out of bed, and Marc tries to pull her back in. She throws his arm off and says no. Too little, too late, I think. Also, he's a scuzz. And grody. I don't know if I mentioned that.
Irulan apparently hopped out of bed to call Gabe, her boyfriend, and do spin control. She claims that her boss was hitting on her, but that she didn't do anything bad, and that it was all innocent fun. The evil editors flash back to all of the flirtations we saw. Irulan baby-talks Gabe and I throw up and move on.
The roommates report to a meeting with Marc. It seems to me that besides the obvious reason why he shouldn't try to hook up with these women (i.e. opening himself up to sexual harassment lawsuits), it will also mean that they have no respect for him. Then again, I don't know if the Real World roommates have ever respected their bosses on the show, so that's nothing new. And I wouldn't respect him if only for the reason that he's wearing a red bandanna on his head. He tells them to make up a list of ten things a person dressed as an angel could do in the club, and the same for a person dressed as a devil. Marc puts his hand to his head, revealing his grody, grody pit stains. He says that his announcement probably comes as no surprise, but that they can't drink on the job, and that if they ask to do it, it will piss him off more. Marc adds that he might offer, but they can't ask. That's kind of messed up. Either you don't want them to drink, or you don't care, but to say that sometimes they can, if you give permission, seems weird. But I've never worked in a bar or club, and maybe that's par for the course. In an interview, Arissa says that their boss "might be schizo" because he tells them they can't drink at work and then in the breath offers to buy them a round. Marc says that if drinking affects their ability to succeed, they'll end up working at Garduno's, the hotel's restaurant. We see some footage of people washing dishes and a waitress carrying a large tray of food. Oh, no! Not a restaurant! He acts like he's threatening them with working on the chain gang, breaking rocks. Marc says that he likes the roommates a lot, and that he doesn't want to be the bad-guy boss. He likes being friends with them, and asks them not to put him in a position to reprimand them. Okay, worst Real World boss ever. Sometimes you have to reprimand your employees, and if you can't handle that, you shouldn't be the boss. But don't blame them for your own shortcomings.
Back at the suite, Brynn, Arissa, and Irulan discuss how stupid that meeting was. Arissa says that Marc wants to be their boss at 2 in the afternoon, but their friend at 2 in the morning. Irulan says that she thought they could all be friends at first, but it's not going to work if Marc is going to be "disgruntled" in meetings. In an interview, Irulan says that she doesn't think Marc should reprimand them about drinking, since he was drinking with them. Welcome to the world of shitty bosses, Irulan. Sometimes, the bosses, they are crazy. And sometimes, the rent, she needs to be paid. And sometimes, the recapper, she starts talking like Antonio Banderas. No one knows why. Don't disrespect the sexy! Arissa says that Marc is still their boss, even if he doesn't act like it. Irulan says that isn't cool with her. Well, stop the presses. It's not cool with Irulan? Fire him! Bring me his head on a platter.
Brynn drops the roommates off somewhere, and she and Frank leave in the van. Trishelle, Steven, Arissa, Irulan, and Alton hang out. Trishelle asks Arissa if Frank drove her crazy last night, which leads me to believe that Frank might be wrong about how they love to joke around together. Arissa tells them that Frank told a friend that Arissa was the black bitch in the house. The roommates are all shocked. Alton is really angry. In an interview, Arissa says that her roommates' reactions are adding "gasoline to the fire." Arissa asks them all to back her up, because if she "goes to lunch on somebody," she doesn't want to get kicked out. I think I need an Arissa-to-English translator. In an interview, Alton says that he's pissed. Pissed! Because Arissa is his girl! Even though we haven't really seen them say two words to each other.
Everyone is pissed now that they know what Frank said. Arissa is looking around! Trishelle's hair is messy! Wait, Trishelle's hair is always messy. Brynn and Frank return in the van to pick them up. Alton talks about how pissed he is. Arissa asks him not to talk to Frank right now. In an interview, Steve says that even though Arissa asked Alton not to say anything to Frank, Alton did it anyway. Alton and Frank walk through the casino. Alton asks what "the 'black bitch' thing" is about. Frank is silent. Alton tells him that if it was a joke, "it's a crass-assed joke." I am so adopting "crass-assed" into my vocabulary. Alton is disappointed. Frank is shocked. Alton talks about how hard it is for Arissa to be a black woman in this society. Frank says that he's really sorry, and that he didn't mean to disrespect anyone, and he knows now that he took it too far. In an interview, Alton says that it only took them "fifty-eight seconds to get to the bottom of it," because "Frank's a good guy." Also, because I think Frank honestly meant it as a joke, and didn't know that it might be offensive. I mean, it's an incredibly unfunny joke, but then again, it's Frank -- he of little personality. Frank claims that he doesn't know what is okay to joke about. Arissa gets into the elevator with them and starts yelling at Alton for not giving her the chance to talk to Frank first. So then they get into an argument over who should have been allowed to get into an argument with Frank first and I am already so tired of this subplot.
When they walk out, Arissa sits down, and Frank asks if they're going to talk about it later. Arissa wants to talk about it now, and Frank is all for that. Arissa explains why Frank's remark was so hurtful to her, mainly because a lot of white people have called her a black bitch. Frank tries to say that he doesn't think she's bitchy. Arissa calms down a bit and explains that Frank can't just throw out the black thing for no reason, because "there's a fine line." Frank says that he didn't know, and he apologizes to her; he says he is especially sorry that she's been upset about it for twelve hours and he didn't know, which was kind of a passive-aggressive thing to say. But not as passive-aggressive as what Arissa says when Frank asks for a hug: "I don't want my black bitchiness to rub off on you." Even if she was joking, that was kind of a shitty thing to say. Frank is confused about whether things are cool between them or not, and Arissa claims that she's fine and she was just joking. Whatever. She's clearly still upset about it, and she should either accept his apology and drop it, or tell him that she's still upset and needs to cool off for a while. In an interview, Frank says that he needs to start thinking a lot more about the words he says before he says them. Yes, Frank, that's a good policy in life.
Irulan talks to Gabe on the phone and says she doesn't want to do her job anymore. Meanwhile, Steven meets with Marc and tells him that, "for [his] own good," he shouldn't flirt with the girls anymore. Marc says he knows that the girls talk to each other about it. Steven repeats that Marc should stop "for [his] own good." What is Steven, mobbed up all of a sudden? Why is he speaking in code? "Marc from Rain sleeps with the fishes." In an interview, Steven says that Marc is a smart guy who does a lot of dumb things. Irulan tells Gabe about her friendship and innocent flirting with Marc, which turned not so innocent. Marc tries to claim that flirting is part of the nightclub business, but Steven tells him that the girls are saying bad things about him, and he needs to stop. So that Steven can get more for himself. Irulan tells Gabe that their boss is sexually harassing all of the women in the house. Irulan continues to rewrite history by claiming that Marc took her up to his hotel room (with a gun to her head?) and pulled the covers over her head and shoved his hands down her pants. Does she not know that she was being filmed? Marc tells Steven that if he's going to be the bad guy, it's going to be work-related. Irulan tells Gabe that Marc is a molester.
The roommates cook dinner. Alton asks Irulan why she called Marc a molester. Irulan says that Marc is their boss and he has "imposed himself in a sexual way" on all the women. Yeah, that's called being creepy, and if this is the first time some dude in a position of power over you has "imposed himself in a sexual way," consider yourself lucky. I think very few women get to the age of twenty-one without that happening at least once. Alton asks whether Marc has jumped on anyone. Irulan admits that Marc didn't force himself on anyone. Irulan brings up that Marc got in bed with naked Arissa, leaving out the part where Irulan told him to do that. In a confessional, Alton says that more than one person crossed the line, and that it's not all Marc's fault. Irulan and Alton continue to discuss it, and Irulan asks the other women how they feel, and whether Marc's behavior has been appropriate. Trishelle shakes her head no. In an interview, Trishelle says that Marc isn't very professional, but that it takes two to tango. Alton tells Irulan that it's not cool to peg Marc as a molester if he didn't do anything, and if he did, she should call the police. Thank you, Alton, voice of reason. Alton offers to beat Marc's ass if he really did something to Irulan and Arissa. Irulan admits that "molester" is not what she meant. Arissa says that if Irulan has a problem, she should tell Marc exactly what made her uncomfortable. Did I just hear two roommates speak in a mature fashion about a big drama in one scene? I may faint dead away. Arissa says that they each need to establish the line with Marc.
Irulan runs out of the room and calls Marc to ask him to meet with her. Marc shows up, and Arissa is there as well. For moral support? To have a cigarette? Have I mentioned that these people smoke a lot? Irulan says that it took her some time to figure out what was making her uncomfortable, and that she doesn't want her personal feelings to affect the job. Irulan says that for Marc to be both a friend and a boss has created a gray area. Marc says that they shouldn't interpret one night of flirting as something devious, and that he has no ulterior motive. He enjoys hanging out with them and will miss them when they're gone, and he just wants to have fun. Irulan says that there is a discrepancy between Marc's intentions and the way they are received, and that she won't be putting herself in a position where the line is unclear. In a confessional, Irulan says that she knows she has to be clearer about the signals she is sending out, and that she won't be in a compromising position with Marc or anyone. Marc asks them to give him the benefit of the doubt. Irulan promises to come to him if anything like this comes up again, which she's sure it won't. Marc kind of walks away. Irulan tells him that they're cool, and he walks over to the elevator to leave.
week: It looks like Brynn gets jealous of Steven and Trishelle, which somehow leads to a physical fight between Steven and Brynn. There may be airborne utensils. And Steven wants Brynn out of the house. Man, so much drama, so early.