Real World Reunion 2000

S08E23

As with the Real World Reunion recap, the first time I discuss a particular cast member, I will identify which season that person was on. After that, you're on your own.

They don't even try to use the typical Real World opening credits this time around, which is our first signal that this reunion is going to be very different from the last one. We learn that this is the true story of four casts, Miami, Boston, Seattle and Hawaii, who are going to a reunion, "Las Vegas style." What is with Bunim-Murray and Las Vegas? They started the Challenge 2000 there too. They must have a good rate at the Hard Rock Hotel or something. Or maybe they just keep hoping that two of the cast members will sneak off and get a quickie marriage, and they want to enable that in every way possible. Anyway, Dave Holmes hosts this reunion, since Alison Stewart is now on ABC at like 5:00 AM. That's okay, because I like Dave better. As a side note though, the longer he's on MTV, the more uncomfortable he makes me. Remember when he first lost the VJ contest and he was all, "I'm just a regular guy who has an encyclopedic knowledge about music, and I promise not to make Carson look too stupid"? Now he's all, "I've got some blond highlights and a goatee, and the ladies love me. But I won't sell out and lose the weight, because that would be wrong. Plus, it's in my contract that I can't be better looking than Carson. But that doesn't mean I won't try. Yeah, I caught Christina Aguilera looking at me the other day during TRL. I'll show her what a girl wants. Oh, sorry. Where was I? Yeah, fame hasn't gone to my head, really." You know what I mean? Sorry, that was a little off topic.

Anyway, the first segment of the show consists of clips of various people arriving in Las Vegas, and giving interviews describing what they're doing these days. Jason from Boston tells us he moved to Santa Cruz, California. He's about to pick up Kameelah from Boston at the airport. He hasn't seen her in over a year. You may remember that Jason and Kameelah had a flirtation during their season, but they both claim nothing ever happened. Kameelah arrives and squeals when she sees Jason, and they share a big hug.

up is Genesis from Boston, shown arriving at the airport with her mom. Oh wait, that's not her mom. That's her girlfriend! Well, it was an honest mistake since her girlfriend looks about 50 years old. Anyway, Genesis has really long hair that looks like a wig, but is wearing a nice linen-looking pants suit. She tells us that she's anxious to see everyone, "not that [she has] to prove [herself] to anybody, but to see their reaction on the changes [she's] made" and also that she's curious to know how they view her, not that she cares, but she wants to know. Hmm, I remember that Genesis was really insecure and it looks like not much has changed. Talking about how you don't have to prove yourself is a sure sign that you feel like you do, in my book.

David from Seattle tells us he's there to get a good tan and win ten thousand dollars at the slot machines, probably to make up for all the money he didn't win on Challenge 2000. Jason and Kameelah enter the hotel, and they see Janet in the elevator. Janet's all huggy to Jason, who pretty much blows her off. Flora and Melissa from Miami enter the hotel lobby. Flora says that everyone knows her, and in Las Vegas, they treat her like a celebrity. I really am not getting the Vegas/Bunim-Murray connection here. Why would Flora be treated like a celebrity there? Melissa says she wasn't going to come but Flora talked her into it.

We see a bunch of people waiting in line outside the auditorium. Dave Holmes is backstage, watching the audience filter in on a monitor. He claims to be a huge fan of Real World and says it should be an interesting night. Syrus is wearing a white hat and a white suit. What is he, Mr. Roarke? He says it'll be a good time. Ruthie holds up a zebra-print thong and tells us that is the underwear she will be wearing for the reunion. Oookay. Sean gets made up. In case you were wondering, they all have professional hair and make-up artists working on them, so I feel completely justified in making fun of the way they look. Not that I didn't before, but now I know that someone tried to make them look good. David from Seattle meets Justin, and they shake hands. Flora says that she's not going to hug anybody. Ruthie claims that they are the "most interesting people in the nation." Let's just assume that was taken out of context. I think she was referring to the number of people who lined up to get into the auditorium. Annoying tells us she's a person with faults. Well, duh. I've only been pointing that out for like, a year. Tet Girl stole Lisa Loeb's glasses and tells us that it's too soon to be having a reunion. Cynthia and Melissa from Miami are talking about Tet Girl, saying that she's stressed out. Cynthia told her that it's too soon and to give it time. Melissa says what I think should be cross-stitched onto a little sampler and given to every Bunim-Murray graduate: "The first year, you're bitter. The second year, you seek professional help. The third year, you're over it!" Cynthia agrees. Dave Holmes tells us again that he loves the show, and that he watches it all the time. He's hoping for a "couple of brawls" and some "fireworks." Elka from Boston is nervous. Finally, Dave starts the intro, by telling us that the show is a "full-on cultural phenomenon" and that it has "changed the way we look at movies and television." Feeling a little self-congratulatory, aren't we? That would be like if I started every recap by saying something like, "Kim's recaps are hilarious and people flock from all over the web to read them." While I wish it were true, and I do my best to make it true, starting off every recap with a statement like that would be a bit of a turnoff, no? Anyway, Dave mentions the upcoming ninth season, which takes place in New Orleans, and says that people always want to catch up with the casts from past seasons, so this is our opportunity. Then, after all that hype, we cut to commercial.

Dave Holmes asks if we're ready and then announces a look back at the Miami season from 1996. When the clips start rolling, I'm reminded how incredible their house was, being right on the ocean and all. Mike looks about twenty-five pounds lighter than he did on Challenge 2000. He looks like a different person. Anyway, Mike says that Dan is "a cross between the Joker from Batman and Satan." Dan does some modeling and then is told he acts "too flamboyant." Dan tells us that watching Flora is like watching someone with Tourette's because you don't know what that person will do . Flora tells us she's in love with Mitchell, even though they fight on the phone, and she dates someone named Louis. Joe proposes to the Amazonian Nic, and Melissa says that Joe will always be a womanizer. The clips end and the cast enters the stage. Dan seems to have lost the weight that Mike gained in some sort of Real World weight transfer program. Flora looks like Cher circa 1977. Joe is wearing a bright yellow fleece pullover and looks even nerdier than he used to, if that's possible. Sarah, Melissa and Cynthia look pretty much the same. Dave asks them what they are doing now. Dan claims to be working as a "model scout" in Chicago, since he worked as a model for four years, and he thanks MTV for enabling him to get that job. Well, at least he's honest. Flora claims to be a trapeze artist, but some on-screen text tells us that she's actually pursuing acting, and has appeared on The Practice. She has? Dave asks her about Mitchell, and Dan reaches over and holds up Flora's hand, revealing a wedding band, and Flora says Mitchell, "finally made an honest woman out of [her]." Melissa says she followed Flora into the circus, but she's a juggler, and the onscreen text says she's really working as a host and reporter on Spanish language television. I'm all for having some fun and telling jokes, but couldn't they have come up with something better? After each of them told their tales, the audience just sat in stunned silence.

Cynthia says she worked for a California music television channel, and the on-screen text says she also appeared in an independent film called Big Ballers. Is that a porno? Cynthia is also looking for a boyfriend, and tells a guy in the audience that she'll hook up with him later, and finishes by saying she's thankful for the opportunities she's been given. Sarah says she went back to editing comic books for a while, and then toured with Lilith Fair (as part of ChickClick!) and the Family Values tour. Mike went into the family business and became a private investigator. Joe wrote a book, and found that he likes working with kids, so he started the Joe's World Foundation. He got funding from Steve Wozniak (of Apple Computers fame). Dave asks about the book he wrote, Living in Joe's World, which is to this day, the only unauthorized book about Real World. I've read it, by the way, and frankly it was really boring. I was hoping for inside dirt on the show and the Miami cast. He took a few swipes, but nothing you wouldn't see in a confessional. I don't know what the big deal was. Anyway, Joe says he wanted to write a book because no one else had. Dave asks who has read it, and Dan rolls his eyes, then Sarah says she did. Dave asks Dan what he thought, since Joe claimed in the book that Dan spent a lot of time posing in the mirror. Joe claims that he was fair in his assessments, and that he ripped himself apart too. Dan nods sarcastically, and otherwise mugs for the cameras. In an interview, Melissa says, "Joe. It's MTV. Get over it."

Dave introduces a clip of the big fight between Dan and Melissa. Quick background: Melissa read a letter that Dan left on the desk, and admitted that she likes to snoop. She found an envelope on the floor that contained slides Dan needed for work, and opened it. Dan was pissed, because he has previously asked her to leave his stuff alone. That night, they had a big confrontation about it, where Dan called Melissa a bitch, and she called him a "flamer." After the clip, Melissa and Dan both laugh about it. Melissa says that after the fight, she left the house and all she could think about was how mad her gay friends would be mad that she said "flamer." Dan says that everyone has their moments, and that he was really upset about something else entirely, and took it out on Melissa. In an interview, Melissa tells us that when Dan was younger, he put a personal ad in a gay newsletter, and kept the responses in an envelope. His mom found the envelope, and that's how she found out Dan is gay (and she wasn't supportive at first), so he's understandably sensitive about people looking at his stuff. Dan says it was a dumb fight, and in an interview tells us that he and Melissa smiled at each other and non-verbally communicated that the fight was in the past.

Dave brings up Joe's girlfriend Nic, and Joe says they are no longer together. Some woman in the audience blows kisses at Joe. I really never understood why Joe was such a womanizer. He's not cute, and he doesn't seem to have a good personality. I guess he's kind of smart. I don't get it. Anyway, Dave says that breakups are always hard, but it must be even harder seeing your relationship on television all the time, like, dude, rub it in. We see a montage of Nic and Joe together. Joe says every day, someone asks him about her. Mike says that no one said it at the time, but Nic was a real bitch. Cynthia says she did say it at the time, and she always thought Joe could do better.

Dave introduces the infamous shower scene. Quick background: Mike picked up a waitress at a bar and brought her back to the house. Melissa agreed to join them in the Jacuzzi. There was some definite action going on in the Jacuzzi, so much that the editors had to do some blurring out of body parts. It was good practice for the Hawaii season. Then, the three went swimming naked in the ocean, and then came in the house and ended up in Dan's shower together. Dan, Sarah, and Flora listened outside the window, and then Flora decided to try to climb in the window. When she was halfway in, the window broke. Melissa claimed that she didn't participate. Dave asks Mike what happened. He says he had a lot of fun, and that there was a full moon, they were all drunk, and that the other roommates did similar things, but just not on camera. Melissa corroborates Mike's story. In an interview, Melissa says that Mike couldn't "rise to the occasion." I think Melissa wins the prize for most revealing interviews!

Dave introduces the cast from Boston. The clip package shows us Elka saying she can't live with these people; Genesis pulling down Sean's underwear; Montana's multiple boyfriends; Montana saying that Elka is a virgin; Genesis saying that she likes women but she's attracted to drag queens; Syrus bringing home various women; and the group working in an after-school program for kids. The cast enters. Elka looks like a cross between Celine Dion and Jennifer Aniston, and she's wearing a bindhi. I truly thought I had seen the last of those when the Hawaii season ended. As Wing Chun pointed out, Jason is channeling Seth Green, and not very well. Syrus has on a lot of gold chains. Genesis looks like a porn star. I know a lot of people thought she looked great, but I thought she looked better in Boston. At least she didn't look plastic then.

Dave asks what everyone is doing now. Elka lives in Las Vegas, is attending UNLV and is still with Walter. In an interview, Jason says that Elka has grown up and become gorgeous. Jason got a job with Bunim-Murray as a casting director, helped to cast the Hawaii season (so I blame him for my pain) and has now started an Internet company. Kameelah is a senior at Stanford, and is applying to medical school. The helpful on-screen text tells us she likes to salsa dance twice a week. The hell? In an interview, Kameelah tells us that she had "zero tolerance" when she was on the show, but she has learned patience since then. Genesis says she got married, and points out her wife (who I thought was her mother, earlier). Dave Holmes refers to the wife as "Mrs. Genesis," but her real name is Paige. In case you didn't get that she's not a drag queen (and I wouldn't blame you for being confused), Genesis tells us in an interview that she can't predict people's reactions to homosexuality. Oh, wait, Genesis is a lesbian? Now they tell me! Dave asks Paige how they met, and the reply is "in a club." Genesis says Elka was a witness at their wedding, which took place in Las Vegas. In an interview, Elka tells us that Paige is wonderful and has been a friend, a lover, and a mother figure to Genesis. I have no comment on that. Genesis tells us they've been together two years. Genesis is trying way too hard, here. Syrus designs video games, and is currently working on "March Madness 2001." Kameelah tells us in an interview that Syrus is the same, "ladies' man, playa's playa, flashy clothes, tons of jewelry, sunglasses in the auditorium." Syrus says life is good.

Dave says that Sean got married and they show a montage of Sean and Rachel when they met on the Challenge. Sean says he liked her, but Rachel says she wasn't sure. Eventually, they got together, obviously. In an interview, Sean says how glad he is to have on video the moment when he first met his wife. That is kind of cool. And kind of creepy. Dave introduces Rachel and the baby, Evita. Rachel has the Courteney Cox bangs from Scream 3, and they are not flattering. She's also wearing a pink shirt and orange pants. She tells Dave the baby is five months old. Sean rambles on about how long they dated, and he's clearly trying to finesse the timeline of their relationship so as not to reveal that Rachel got knocked up before they got married. I mean, I admire them for trying to give the kid a stable home and all that, but the way he babbles, I can just imagine Rachel prepping him: "And don't tell anyone WHY we got married! Just say we're in love and happy and settled." So Sean does. In an interview, Sean tells us how everyone was initially skeptical about their relationship, but they lie in bed at night and laugh about how wonderful their lives are. That seems like the kind of clip that will end up coming back to haunt you. Sean says he passed the bar exam and is practicing law in Hayward, Wisconsin, his hometown. Rachel is taking a break from her career in "hostessing and acting" but when she returns, she's going to "base herself out of Hayward." In other words, she gave up her career to move to Nowheresville, USA. Syrus tells us in an interview that he doesn't feel like he and Sean can go out and have fun anymore. Dave asks how marriage and parenthood has changed their lives. Sean says, "Greatly." In an interview, Rachel and Sean are sitting with their arms linked in a totally artificial and uncomfortable looking way, like we get it! You guys are totally in loooove. Rachel says that your twenties are a crazy time, and for them, it's all on tape. Sean says that he and Rachel will have to deal with the show with their children. That would be weird -- seeing your mom and dad, before they met, on television. Seeing your mom kiss Puck. Ew! Sean tells Dave that they're not as wild and crazy as they once were and Rachel quickly adds, "It's a good life." Rachel and the baby leave as we go to commercial. Before we do, though, they show Montana saying that she's sorry she couldn't be there, and we learn she lives in San Francisco and works in PR (at Stoosh's company!).

up, Dave Holmes introduces the Seattle season, featuring "a cast that nobody could forget." The clip package shows various shots of the cast acting goofy, Lindsey hanging from the rock-climbing wall in their house and Rebecca saying that David is a "smooth character" with a "machismo side." David tells us that his penis was "the eighth roommate" and then falls in love with Kira, the casting director. In one of the greatest Real World confessionals of all time, David says dramatically that his relationship will make it "more real than anything you fucking have!" Nate kisses Stephanie a lot, and Janet says Nate's commitment makes him attractive to her. Irene and Nathan clown around. Janet finds out they are going to work at a radio station. Irene says she has to marry Stephen because he can cook. Irene goes loony because of her Lyme Disease. The clip package ends and the cast walks out. They are doing this weird staging where they have the cast members enter from different parts of the auditorium for some reason. Everyone looks pretty much the same, except Lindsey and Janet have longer hair. Nate tells us that it's good to see everyone and that they've all grown up a little bit. Dave Holmes asks everyone what they are currently doing. Nate is appearing in the films Wicked Spring and Tangy Guacamole, not coming soon to any theater near you, I would imagine. Nate says being on the show made his "dreams come true" and that he dropped out of VMI (Virginia Military Institute). We see some clips of Nate and David at VMI, in case you forgot. It was in Virginia, it was military and it was an institute. Nate felt like he had a "window of opportunity" and draws a little window in the air, but says he has an "open invitation to go back" and finish. Dave Holmes asks him about Stephanie, his girlfriend during the show. Nate says they were on and off for a while, and everyone cheers. Nate gets all mad and tells the audience that Stephanie is a nice person. How does he know they weren't cheering because they were on, not off? Anyway, they're not together anymore, and Stephanie is in another relationship and Nate is single.

Dave Holmes talks about the seventh roommate, Irene, who isn't there today, and introduces a tape. From that introduction, you'd think this interview was taped especially for the reunion, right? Like the one they showed of Montana earlier? Yeah, not quite. The tape starts with Irene saying how she really does have Lyme Disease, but how being in Seattle made things worse. And I'm thinking, "This sounds really familiar. Almost as if I have heard it or read it before." So I whip out my Real World Seattle book and look in the Irene section, and there are the contents of the tape word for word. The producers totally took an interview Irene did just after she left the house and pretended it was current. If you don't believe me, check page forty-nine of the book for yourself, and the book was published in 1998. Anyway, the tape ends with Irene saying that David and Rebecca supported her when she was sick, Nathan, Stephen and Janet didn't support her, and Lindsey was caught in the middle. She feels Nathan, Stephen and Janet were a "bunch of Judases." She doesn't have any hate or animosity for her roommates, but they burned and betrayed her. After the tape is over, Dave asks the cast what they think. In an interview, Nathan says it was weird that Irene split the house in half like that. Back at the reunion, Nate says he doesn't feel that he burned Irene, because she pulled away and didn't reach out to anyone, and if she expected them to be able to see through the smoke and clouds, he's sorry he didn't. He thinks she's wrong for feeling burned, and she burned them by leaving so quickly. Stephen says it's a "wrong judgment" for Irene to think he's a Judas because he can remember many nights spent on the couch with her when he could have been "out drinking, with [his] boys, or doing something else," but he spent time with Irene because he does care. I can't believe Stephen is even claiming that he ever treated Irene right, considering that he stole her stuffed animal, then lied about it, then threw it in the water and slapped her. So, to Stephen, I'd like to give the full body whatever. In an interview, Stephen tells us that Nathan is "selfish and unconscious with his actions." On stage, Stephen says he thinks Nathan should have "been there in the end." Nathan looks incredulous. In an interview, Nathan says that it's ridiculous for Stephen to say he should have been there, since Stephen wasn't there for Irene either, and in fact, Nathan feels that nobody was.

As with the Real World Reunion recap, the first time I discuss a particular cast member, I will identify which season that person was on. After that, you're on your own.

Dave Holmes says, "Speaking of the end," and Nathan gets all happy that someone is going to remind everyone exactly how Stephen treated Irene at the end. In case you somehow missed the story of what Dave Holmes calls "the slap heard 'round the world," it went a little something like this. Irene had either symptoms of Lyme Disease, or she went crazy, depending on who's telling the story. She went to a counselor and decided to leave the house. On her departure day, she was looking for the stuffed animal she slept with, and asked everyone, including Stephen, if they had seen it. No one had. As she walked out for the last time, she called Stephen out, saying that she had a gift for him. She told him that they could never be married because Stephen's a homosexual. Stephen responded by miming masturbation towards her, and Irene walked off. Before she could leave, Stephen ran inside and then ran out, got Irene's attention, and revealed that he had her stuffed animal, and threw it in the water. Irene got in the car to leave, and Stephen ran out, opened the car door, and slapped Irene in the face. Afterwards, the roommates watched the footage and decided that Stephen could only stay in the house if he got anger management counseling. There's a lot more to the story, but that's the gist. Anyway, they show all the footage and Stephen cringes during the slap. In an interview, Stephen says that he wants people who have been affected by "negativity in [his] life" to know that he didn't mean it, and that he was doing it for the wrong reasons. Dave Holmes asked what they have learned since then, and Stephen says he wishes Irene were there so they could handle it face to face. Dave asks the other roommates what they think, and everyone is really silent. Finally, David speaks up and says he doesn't condone it, but people lose their tempers and their self-control sometimes. Whatever, David. I don't know why they are all being such apologists for Stephen because he was clearly in the wrong here. But don't get me started. In an interview, David says that both Stephen and Irene are to blame, and it's too bad that the last image of Irene is of being slapped, but Stephen has the image of him slapping a woman to deal with. They're all just pissing me off right now. Rebecca says she's sad Irene isn't there, but that she's talked to Irene and it's hard for her to deal with this "lame, unfortunate incident." No, when someone falls off a bicycle, it's a lame, unfortunate incident. Why are they all acting like Stephen did it by accident? Ugh. In an interview, Rebecca says that Irene was her best friend on the show, and that it's difficult for Irene to see everyone because it's a part of her life about which she's upset. Rebecca thinks that if Irene had come, there wouldn't be any fighting, only relief. I could go on for pages and pages about this, but you know what? I'll be recapping the Seattle season soon and I'll save my comments for those recaps.

Dave takes questions from the audience. Someone asks if David regrets the "Kira situation"? For those who don't know, David got involved with a casting director named Kira, even though it was in her contract that she couldn't get involved with a cast member. Kira ended up getting fired over it, then came to stay with David in Seattle for a while. Eventually, she wanted him to leave the show, or come live with her once the show was over, and he didn't want to. This led to many dramatic scenes, including one that never fails to induce giggles, where David and Kira are in a truck and David yells, "You just don't know, Kira!" and punches the dashboard. This is all reviewed via clips. Afterwards, David says he doesn't regret getting involved with her, but he regrets the way it was portrayed and he regrets that she was affected, both personally and professionally. Dave Holmes asks the cast how they've grown since their season ended. Nate says being on the show is the first time you get to see yourself through someone else's eyes, and he saw his faults and what he needed to work on to be a better person. In an interview, Nathan tells us that he was drinking excessively when he was on the show, and he was "ugly and sloppy," so he's cut back on that "100%." I'm not quite sure how that works out mathematically, but I guess it's a good thing. Back on stage, Nathan says he got to see who he actually is. Janet says she has shared something with her roommates. Dave Holmes brings up that she got involved with another Real World-er, and they cut to Jason, like we didn't get it from the eight thousand other times they've already mentioned it. Janet says she doesn't know what Dave is talking about, so he introduces yet another clip package. We see lots of clips of Janet and Jason talking about how attracted they are to one another. Then, a producer is interviewing Jason and he is told that they caught him and Janet on the tennis courts, which causes Jason to run away from the camera and swear. Then they tell Janet the same thing, and she swears a blue streak, and then denies that it was her. Back on stage, Dave Holmes asks Janet about it, and she says it was "innocent." Dave asks Jason and he agrees. In an interview, Jason says that he "leapt on her like a beast, threw her up against the wall and started kissing her." What tennis court has walls? Dave Holmes asks what attracted them to each other, like that's a good question. Why do you think they were attracted to each other? Jason mumbles something about the close quarters and Janet being beautiful. Janet says Jason understood her, and he was sensitive, but ultimately it didn't work out because they value their friendship too much. In an interview, Janet says you can't change Jason. Dave Holmes asks if there is any chance of them getting back together. I can't believe they are giving this issue so much airtime, like anyone cares. Janet says they will be "friends for life" and Jason agrees. An audience member asks about their best memory from the experience. Nathan hogs the spotlight some more by saying it was during the casting special, when he saw his mother for the first time in seventeen years, and got to meet his half-brother for the first time.

Dave finally introduces the Hawaii cast. The clip package features Annoying falling down while surfing, Ruthie stripping and Teck and Ruthie jumping naked into the pool. Tet Girl says she really likes looking at herself. Wonder Bread says they are going to be running a "performance café." Teck is a womanizer. Annoying and Colin kiss. Justin is gay. Tet Girl says that Justin enjoys manipulating people. Justin leaves the house. Ruthie drinks. Ruthie drinks some more. Ruthie drinks a lot. Wonder Bread gets all up in her business, by saying that they are concerned about her. The roommates stage an intervention where they tell Ruthie she has to get help, or leave the house. The clips end and everyone walks out. They look pretty much the same. Colin and Matt are missing in action. Teck is live via satellite from Albany, where he's doing a speech at a college. Dave asks Teck what he's doing these days. Teck says he's finishing up his film, called "Life's Suite," and he works with MTV, and still talks to women. He claims he's "about to blow up." You know, he only has about six more months to say that, before it becomes sad. up is Ruthie, who says she didn't hear any love from Teck, so Dave gets the audience to cheer for her. In an interview, Annoying says she is proud of Ruthie because she's overcome a lot. Ruthie says she graduates from college in May. Some on-screen text informs us that Ruthie's friends call her "Dr. Ruthie" because she "coaches couples on better intimacy." Justin tells us he's back in school at Harvard Law. Dave asks if people look at him differently now. Justin says the show has changed the way he looks at himself. In an interview, Justin says he is "more relaxed, more laid back, and more mature." Justin says his closest friends understood both the good and bad parts of the show and helped him cope. Dave asks Tet Girl, "What are you doing now?" Tet Girl says, "Right now? Sitting here with these

beautiful people." Like, ha ha, not. In an interview, Tet Girl says she is looking at herself "from a real perspective" and seeing what "positive influence" she can have on people her age. I think the most positive influence she could have would be to drop out of sight for a long, long time. Dave says he heard she has a poem for them, like clearly this was something set up before the show. Tet Girl acts like she didn't know he was going to ask that, and says she could give him something off the top of her head, but then she wouldn't have the copyright. She offers to give him "poetic verse from [her] brain" and encourages everyone to speak as much truth as possible. Please, don't let Tet Girl ever do the Challenge because I don't want to ever have to listen to her talk again. Teck bursts out laughing and says, "I love you, Kaia!" Kaia finally answers the original question by saying that she is writing now. In an interview, Justin says it's hard to say what's happened to Tet Girl in the past year, but that she has distanced herself from their house and other houses, and he hopes it's a phase because "people miss her and know she's bright, talented and interesting." She is? Annoying is up , and tells us she graduated and is working and leading a private life, when she's not on the Challenge.

An audience member asks Annoying if the whole trip has made her a better, stronger person, like that question wasn't planted. Annoying says she's grown a lot, and that she rated each episode based on whether she would hang out with herself or not that week. Most of the time, she wouldn't. Me neither! Who knew we had so much in common? In an interview, Annoying says she took away a sense of who she is and is still taking time to learn and know who she is. Dave asks her about Colin. Annoying says sarcastically that she never has to talk about that. Annoying needs some lessons in sarcasm because she's just not very good at it. Anyway, we are treated to another endless clip package featuring the "romance" of Colin and Annoying. At one point, Colin says that living with the person he's dating is "overbearing" and we see a clip of Annoying rolling her eyes. After the clips end, Annoying starts to answer, but is interrupted by Teck's mugging on the monitor. She finally says that the last year was a blur for her, and that Colin is not a part of her life, and that she moved on after they all left. In an interview, Teck says that Colin and Annoying's relationship was based on fear, and that they were outsiders in the house (how? In what way?) and so they had to come together. I think Teck read that in a book somewhere because that is so not what happened. Dave says the fans enjoyed watching them, and it was sweet. I don't know what show he watched, but clearly it was not the same one I recapped. Annoying says it was "a lot different than what you saw." Teck makes an obscene gesture on the monitor, and it's blurred out, and everyone laughs. Dave reminds Justin that he wanted to break the couple up, and that he got "all Dangerous Liaisons" for an episode. We see a clip from the India trip, where Justin convinced Colin that Annoying was crazy and not someone he should date. Justin says he echoes Annoying's sentiment about the whole time being blurry, and that he hasn't been in contact with Annoying or Colin since he left, but it's good to see Annoying, Annoying agrees that it's good to see him too. In an interview, Justin says he hasn't given any incidents much thought, but that he would have liked to see Colin because he hasn't since he left the house, and he regrets not talking to him. Annoying tells the audience that the phrase for the night is "moving on." As we go to commercial, we see a clip of the "Matt and Colin Show," from the confessional. It freezes on a really unflattering picture of Wonder Bread and the on-screen text says that they couldn't attend the reunion because Colin is on a new NBC sitcom (MYOB, if you're wondering) and Matt is working on NYPD Blue as a glorified gofer. Well, that was the gist of it.

A woman in the audience asks Teck if he's single. Teck says he is and that if he was there, he would be with that woman. She blows him kisses and he wags his tongue at her. That was such a waste of five minutes. Another audience member asks what happened to Ruthie's girlfriend. That sets up what feels like the five hundredth clip package of the night, where we learn that Ruthie had a girlfriend named Jess, and they loved each other. Ruthie says they broke up in April, so now she's "single and willing." Dave takes this opportunity to ask Ruthie about her "battle with drinking." Ruthie says they didn't show the "really fun parts" like when she went skydiving. Hmm, that didn't answer the question. In an interview, Ruthie says that everyone asks her about alcohol, and they should "give it up" because "it's so old." She feels that just because it was a big issue on the show doesn't mean that it was a big issue in real life, and that there was "something going on," but it was only a fraction of the entire experience. Justin says, in an interview, that it's remarkable how "calmly and smoothly" Ruthie made the transition and dealt with it. Dave asks the rest of the cast if they agree with Ruthie, and Tet Girl says she believes in healing. Tet Girl tells us in an interview that she can't change what happened, so her only choice is to move forward and see things from a "positive perspective." I positively hate that medallion she's wearing. Dave asks about the good things from their season. Annoying says they had a lot of fun and laughed a lot. Tet Girl says the positive thing is having seen herself. She sure talks about herself a lot, doesn't she?

An audience member asks why it's against Annoying's religion to eat meat (actually, just pork), but not to walk around naked all the time. We get another clip package from Challenge 2000 where Annoying refused to dunk for pigs' feet, but then did it anyway. Everyone oohs and aahs, and Dave says it was mean, but Annoying answers that she was never naked on the show. The audience member says that she slept in Colin's bed, which is a "no-no" if you're not married. Of all the questions someone could have used to nail Annoying's hypocrisy to the wall, this is the one that got through? Teck starts yelling to "back up off his girl." In an interview, Teck says that his roommates are like his family and it's okay for him to talk about them, but outsiders can't, so he has to defend Annoying, and he loves her. Annoying says that she's speaking for everyone on the panel, but I missed the part where they all got together and elected Annoying their spokesperson. Oh, that's right, it's because they never did that. She tells the audience member that if they had their lives taped for eighteen hours a day for four months, and then cut into a storyline, it would be embarrassing and disappointing. Over Annoying's shoulder, we see Kameelah giving her a dirty look, which cracked me up. Annoying says you learn and you grow, and the audience needs to respect them because they put themselves on the line. Oh, whatever. I didn't enjoy that speech the first time I heard it, when Jon from L.A. gave it in the last reunion. Give me a break. No one forced you to go on the show, and in the eighth season, don't pretend like you didn't know what the show was about. Spare me.

An audience member asks Sean and Jason whether they liked being on Real World or Challenge better. I have no idea why this question was posed to only them, and not Cynthia, Mike, David, Nathan, Janet, Annoying and Teck also. Maybe Dave asked for questions for the Boston cast first. Anyway, Jason says he liked Challenge better because it was shorter, and they were themselves more, so they could "cut loose" because they didn't care. Sean says he like Real World better because it was more in-depth. Do you think Rachel got mad that Sean didn't say he like Challenge better because it's where he met his wife?

Another audience member asks if any of the people from Boston keep in touch with the kids at the community center, where they worked during their season. They all say no, but Sean says he has been back a few times. He asks if anyone remembers "Aldo, my boy," who he took to fly model planes. They show a clip, for those of us who don't remember and couldn't understand what he was talking about by the description, because the producers think we are idiots. Sean says he went back and crashed the plane with Aldo, but he hasn't been back in a few years.

Dave asks if anyone has questions for the Miami cast. An audience member asks if being on the show has helped their careers, or if it's just another page in their history. Melissa answers that it confuses you more. Cynthia says that people think the show gives you "hook-ups all over the place," but for her, she has found she has to do it herself. The show opens doors for you, but you still have to work for it.

An audience member asks if any of them have any regrets. Dan says that he will never wear red, bikini underwear again. We see a clip of the Miami cast playing "Truth or Dare" and Sarah dares Dan to strip down to his underwear. He does, and they are the aforementioned red, bikini underwear. Dan says his true regret is not having as good of a time as he could have, and Melissa agrees. Mike says he regrets seeing Dan in his red underwear, which gets a big laugh. Joe says you live and learn and they had an opportunity to do something that thousands of people want to do. There are some bad parts, but everyone has moved on to bigger and better things. Well, he has anyway. I'm not so sure about the rest of them.

Dave Holmes introduces the lighter side of the Real World, which is yet another clip package featuring scenes from The Real World You Never Saw, which is so lame. They couldn't come up with more original material, and instead had to give us filler? I'm so insulted. Basically, it shows people falling down or acting goofy.

Dave asks Teck for any final comments, and Teck says he's sorry he can't be there and he loves his roommates. Dave pimps the upcoming season, which will take place in New Orleans.

In an interview, Dan talks about how in high school, the yearbook editors would name certain people "Best This" or "Best That," and this reunion was kind of like a graduation, so he made a list too. First up is "Most Changed," and the winner is Genesis. Dan comments, "How hot did she become?" and my answer is "Not very, unless you like Barbie dolls." Genesis says in an interview that she is more confident, and she would do the whole thing over because it changed her life in both good ways and bad ways.

Rebecca gets "Best Eyes," and tells us in an interview that she wants to see her castmates more, and she's leaving with a good feeling. Let's hope she doesn't go home and write a song about it. Dan names Syrus "Best Dressed" because he knows how to accessorize.

Jason gets "Most Likely to Be a Movie Star," because according to Dan, he has a "look in his eye." Jason says in an interview that it "sounds cheesy," but the castmates really care about each other, because they went through an experience together and they have a bond. He's right, it does sound cheesy.

Dave asks Teck for any final comments, and Teck says he's sorry he can't be there and he loves his roommates. Dave pimps the upcoming season, which will take place in New Orleans.

Dan says Mike is "Most Likely To Marry For Money." Mike says that some people changed a lot, and some didn't change at all, and Dan is still a "big yapper." Dan asks if that was mean, to say that Mike is most likely to marry for money. The category is "Best Boobs." Dan says that Annoying had the largest, but Flora "encompasses all that is glorious about the breast." Flora says in an interview that her castmates will forever be her family. Were any of them invited to her wedding? Because it seemed like a bit of a surprise.

Janet gets "Most Likely To Succeed," because Dan thinks she is "really intelligent" and "knows exactly what she wants to do." She does? She didn't sound that way on stage. Janet says that she found closure at the reunion, and she feels relieved, like she finished something really great.

Dan says that Cynthia has the "Best Personality," because she's an "absolute joy to be with." Cynthia says she's glad for the opportunity, but she's glad it's over, and she's glad for some closure with her roommates, and she's glad everyone's doing well. Then she wipes away some tears. One thing about Cynthia is that she always seemed pretty sincere and upfront.

Everyone gathers for a group photo, then there's a commercial for the upcoming Casting Special, which will feature Judd from San Francisco, Sarah from Road Rules Latin America, Janet from Seattle, David from Seattle and Shawn from Road Rules Lamester at Sea, handicapping the odds.

Over the credits, Sean and Rachel talk about all the people that babysat for them during the reunion. They say that Flora was the best babysitter. Rachel left the baby with Ruthie for ten minutes, and when she got back, Ruthie had written her name on the baby's foot, so she doesn't endorse Ruthie as a babysitter. Flora and Melissa were the best. Rachel says Syrus was good too, but Sean doesn't believe it. Sean says the baby tried to "get something" from Flora's breasts, but she doesn't have what Rachel has. Sean keeps babbling as they cut, and you know Rachel was thinking, "Would you shut up! God! Why are you talking about my breasts?"