Previously on The Real World: Mallory had a crush on Leah's brother, and Leah wasn't happy. Mallory confronted Leah about Leah's shitty behavior, and Leah promised to change. The roommates found out that they would be taking a vacation through Europe. Chris thought the trip would either bring everyone closer or tear them all apart. Nothing like hedging your bets there, Chris.
The roommates arrive in Rome. In a confessional, Mallory says she's excited to see everything in Rome. The roommates arrive at their hotel and then immediately leave in a pack. In an interview, Leah explains that her friend Matt is in Rome, and she can't wait to spend time with him. Wasn't Leah the one getting all pissed off that Mallory was hanging out with her aunt and cousin in Nice? Matt shows the roommates the sights. Christina comments that one fountain "doesn't look anything like the one in Las Vegas." At least she has the grace to laugh after saying it. Ace gets his picture taken in front of the Coliseum. Leah points out where Mussolini used to give speeches. Chris interviews that he feels like he should be wearing a toga while he's seeing all of the ancient ruins. The roommates get a group pictures taken at night.
The roommates all go out dancing. The first shot of the club's interior features Adam "dancing," and I actually say out loud, "Oh, Adam." Like, sadly. As in, "Oh, Adam, are you still thinking you're a good dancer?" Leah has a bandanna on her head. For someone so obsessed with fashion labels, she is a shitty dresser. Who wears a bandanna on her head to go out to a club? Leah is also a little drunk, and she slurs to Matt that everyone hates Chris. The problem is that Chris is sitting about two feet away. Leah could reach out and poke him if she wanted to. If I were Chris, I would be really tempted just to shove Leah over. Chris interviews that he heard Leah telling Matt that everyone hates him, and that the girls sitting near him heard it as well, so they looked at him and he had nothing to say about it, since it's the norm. Matt tells Leah that Chris has been great, so he doesn't understand what Leah is going on about. Leah tells Matt to look at Mallory (who is seated to Chris) and note how much Mallory doesn't want to be sitting there. Mallory looks more like she doesn't want to be near Leah, but maybe I'm projecting. Mallory interviews that Leah is being "really, really mean" and "completely out of line."
Matt tells Mallory that he'll give her his brother's email address. Mallory jokes, "I email sixteen-year-olds." Leah gets all pissed and tells Mallory not to talk about her brother that way. Yeah, don't tell anyone his age! How dare you? Leah says she'll deck Mallory right now. Matt tells Leah that he made the joke, so she shouldn't take it out on Mallory. Leah kisses him on the cheek and walks away. Matt is like, "Holy shit," and Mallory's like, "Tell me about it, brother. I live with her." Just keep this incident in mind later when Leah thinks that none of her other friends feel that she is mean or out of control. Mallory interviews that she feels like a coward because she doesn't confront Leah.
The roommates leave the club, and Leah is loud and drunk. Everyone shushes Leah, because there are apartments and such nearby, and it's late. I'm sure that if those people live in apartments near a club, they're used to hearing obnoxious drunks hooting and hollering at all hours. I don't think that's just an American trait. But still, the roommates are well within their rights to tell Leah to keep it down. Christina interviews that she's been avoiding hanging out with Leah because she is loud and negative. Christina and Simon walk down the street holding hands. Christina cringes as Leah continues to yell; Christina points out that people are sleeping. Simon is wearing a black fedora pulled over one eye, a black leather coat, a black t-shirt, and several silver chains. He looks like a cross between one of the Sopranos and a member of the Smiths. Simon interviews that he hates Leah when she's being loud and not caring what others think. Christina says that she realizes that her culture is very loud. Wow, you just now realized that? Simon whispers back, "I live with six of you. I know." Hee!
The day, men drive noisy scooters and yell, "Ciao!" In the hotel, Christina knocks on a door and tells Adam and Ace that checkout is in twenty minutes. Adam and Ace were sharing a bed! Not that there's anything wrong with two guys sharing a bed. It's just funny because it's Adam and Ace. It would be funnier if Christina opened the door and found Adam all curled up around Ace, who was dead asleep, and then Adam raised his head and shushed Christina. Leah sprawls on the bed and says that she's hurting. Christina keeps bitching at Leah to get up and get packed. Leah wonders why people drink alcohol. Christina says, "They're jackasses, when they have to be on a train for thirteen hours." Eesh. Christina interviews that they are leaving Rome and headed to Zermat, Switzerland. The roommates board the train. Adam interviews that they plan to go snowboarding in Switzerland.
Yodeling music plays. Because it's Switzerland! On the train, Adam, Ace, and Chris sit together and play cards. Adam complains that Leah thinks everything is shit. Christina, Mallory, Simon, and Leah sit together. Christina says that Leah asked for an example of when she is loud, so Christina says that she notices others reacting to Leah's loudness. That's not really an example, is it? Mallory agrees. Leah says she doesn't go out of her way to be obnoxiously loud. Christina tells Leah not to take it personally. Yeah, don't take it personally that we think something about you. Leah should take it personally. Simon says that when he thinks of loud people, he thinks that they don't give a damn about anyone else, and that it's a bit much. When I think of loud people, I think they are self-absorbed attention freaks, which pretty much describes anyone who would go on this show. Leah says she's been told that she's loud before, but not to this extent. Simon points out that no one has ever had to spend so much time with her before, either. Leah interviews that she was born loud, that it's part of her personality, and that she's not changing it because she likes it. That's fine, as long as she doesn't mind people avoiding her, resulting in her having no friends. But since her roommates have told her how they feel, she can't blame them now for avoiding her if she refuses to change at all.
The roommates arrive in Switzerland. Adam voice-overs that he's seen a rift forming between Mallory, Simon, Leah, and Christina. The roommates find their hotel as sad music plays.
Mallory, Simon, and Christina have a good shit-talking session in their room. Mallory says that Leah's negativity is contagious, and that she doesn't want to be around that. Simon wonders if it's too late to make a difference. Mallory thinks they should at least try to do something about it. Mallory interviews that they've all been hurt by Leah, and that Leah doesn't see it. Simon says that sometimes the things that annoy him are just part of someone's personality, and that he thinks pointing them out would hurt the person. Simon interviews that he doesn't want to hurt Leah. Mallory says that she can tolerate a personal trait, but that Leah is maliciously rude, and inconsiderate, and that there's no excuse for it.
The roommates go to a store to pick up snowboarding equipment. I hope they are just renting it or whatever. Although, can you rent a jacket? Maybe they are getting all this stuff for free. Ace interviews that he can't ski because he has a bad knee, and that it sucks to hear about everyone else doing it. Simon asks if they are all snowboarding, and Leah says that she's going to ski. Simon interviews that they will all try their best not to die. Simon worries that he's going to kill himself, and asks Leah if they can all snowboard as a group. Leah whines that she doesn't have the proper equipment. Isn't that why they are in a store, picking stuff out? What a lame excuse. Everyone says that they are in the same boat. Christina interviews that Leah feels insecure when the others hang out together. Christina struggles into her boots. Simon appreciates the fashion aspects of his boots. Everyone gets outfitted and waits outside for Simon. Leah says, "I can't wait anymore. I'm going to poke the shit out of Simon with my poles if he doesn't hurry the fuck up." Finally, Simon walks out and he looks pretty cool. Simon interviews that he's not a skier or snowboarder, but that he has to try it once.
The people at the table yell over that the roommates should shut up. Leah says she's leaving and brats, "Simon, sleep with whoever the fuck you want." Mallory tells Leah that she's being unfair. Simon throws up his hands. Christina urges Leah to step outside of herself and just stop, although Mallory is being just as bad about continuing the conversation. The manager comes over and tells them that they can't sit there. Leah bitches that Mallory shouldn't wait until they are at the dinner table to bring up her problems, and storms out. Mallory calls after her, but Leah tells Mallory to come outside. Ace interviews that he's totally embarrassed and has never been kicked out of a restaurant before. Mallory tells Christina that she's ready to let it all out, either in front of Leah or behind her back. The roommates leave the restaurant.
And now it's time for the Most Awesome Thing I Saw on TV Last Week. The most awesome thing I saw on TV last week was a movie on the Lifetime Movie Network (or LMN, for those in the know) called She's No Angel. It starred Carol Seaver (Tracey Gold) as a woman who worked as a bar waitress. So one night this guy grabbed her ass, so Carol decided to quit, but the ass-grabber was her boss's brother, so her boss refused to pay her, so Carol had no money with which to leave town. So then Carol closed the bar and the boss's brother raped her so Carol stuck him with a knife and then the boss tried to beat her up so she stuck him with a knife too and ran off. So then Carol hitched a ride with these newlyweds and Carol tried on the wife's engagement ring and just then they got in a giant car accident but Carol was ejected from the car so she was the sole survivor. When Carol woke up in the hospital, the driver's parents were there, and they thought Carol was their daughter-in-law, whom they had never met. So Carol half-assedly tried to set them straight a few times but not really, because her new in-laws were really rich and owned a vineyard and totally took her in. So then Carol found out she was pregnant by the boss's brother but her in-laws thought it was their grandchild. And also, Carol started hooking up with her "husband's" best friend, which is kind of ghoulish, but whatever. So then Carol's old boss figured out where she was and tracked her down and started blackmailing her. So Carol gave him some money she stole from the vineyard, and then gave him an heirloom bracelet that her mother-in-law gave her, and then some vintage bottles of wine. And the whole time, I guess I was supposed to feel sorry for Carol, since she was the protagonist and all, but I really kind of hated her. Everyone else was so nice, and she kind of sucked. I think I even liked the boss better than her, because even though he was a blackmailer and a rapist's brother, he was just looking for vengeance since his brother was dead. So finally Carol decided to write a note coming clean with her fake in-laws and then run away and have her baby alone, but the boss showed up one last time and then Carol's boyfriend showed up and tried (and failed) to beat up the boss. So then an alarm went off and woke up the in-laws and the father-in-law came out with a shotgun but he got knocked aside so then the mother-in-law (played by the mom from E.T., also known as Mrs. Covington) blew the boss away with the shotgun. So then you'd think that they'd all tell Carol to fuck right off since she'd lied to them and stolen from them, but instead they were all hugging her and shit. Which was horseshit. They should have prosecuted her! But it was still awesome.
Leah arrives back at the hotel, alone, and finds Chris in a little room off the lobby, checking his email. Chris interviews that he could see that Leah was upset. Leah gives Chris her side of the story. I think Chris would be well within his rights to tell Leah to fuck off right now. Instead, he says that the other roommates are wrong, and that he thinks that Leah is the way she is because she's an urban dweller with no time to waste. Chris calls Simon, Mallory, and Christina "the pity committee." That doesn't even make sense. Leah interviews that it feels bad because she's invested a lot of time into her relationship with Simon and Mallory, and now it seems like it wasn't worth it. Chris volunteers to take the knife out of Leah's back. She hugs him and he strokes her hair.
Christina, Mallory, and Simon walk back to the hotel. Simon interviews that he's not angry with Mallory for what she did, and that he thinks she felt braver with two others agreeing with her. Mallory says that Leah will hold it against them for not following her to the hotel, but that she's not going to have it out in the middle of the street. Mallory interviews that maybe Leah didn't want to see the issue, or wasn't ready to see. Mallory still thinks that Leah is too negative.
Simon washes his face. Leah walks into the room and totally ignores him. Simon interviews that it feels crappy not to be on speaking terms with Leah, and that he's not sure what their relationship will be like after this. Simon and Leah both sleep.
The roommates pack up to go home. Adam interviews that they are all tired and mentally and emotionally drained, so it's time to go home. They walk to the train station. Christina interviews that it's frustrating and sad to be ending the vacation on such a bad note. The roommates get on the train. Leah interviews that she feels very alone right now. She's sitting alone on the train, so maybe that's why.
Eiffel Tower Shot Trente-Quatre. Oh, how I've missed you, Eiffel Tower. The roommates walk into their house and start unpacking. Mallory and Leah are in their room, pointedly ignoring each other. Mallory interviews that she still wants to talk to Leah about things.
Chris, Ace, and Adam play pool. Chris talks about how he couldn't just tell Leah to get lost when she came to him crying. Adam interviews that he can't read Leah because one minute she hates Chris and the minute she's hugging him. Chris asks what Adam would have done in that situation. Adam claims he would have told Leah that he wouldn't help her, because they don't have a good relationship. Chris interviews that Leah is in the same position he's been in before, so he can relate. But Leah put him in that position! I don't think he should have told her to fuck off, but he didn't have to be so nice to her. He's a better person than I am. Chris says that maybe Leah was using him as a substitute friend.
Leah sits at the computer. Mallory is standing right there, but they don't speak. Leah interviews that she's not ignoring Mallory, but that she's not engaging with her either. Is this junior high? Who doesn't speak to people when they're mad, for more than, like, ten minutes? Mallory and Leah finally talk. Mallory says that she wants things to be good, like they used to be. Leah says that she does, too. Mallory interviews that she wants resolution with Leah, but that she knows Leah is bitter. Mallory says that she loves being around Leah when she's happy and positive, but that sometimes Leah gets mad and it's scary because she has so much anger. Leah asks if Mallory thinks she likes being upset. Actually, I do think Leah likes it. Remember how happy she was to have a good reason to be mad at Chris? Mallory says it's hard to approach Leah, because she can't see things. Leah asks how Mallory knows that. Mallory says she's tried it. Leah is all, "When? How?" Leah totally doesn't listen and then gets all defensive. Leah interviews that Mallory is afraid of her and uses the excuse that Leah is unapproachable, which Leah doesn't feel is true. Whatever, Leah. Do you want people to fear you?
Leah asks what's so difficult about her. Mallory says that it's how Leah comes at her, and that Leah's not understanding. Basically, Mallory is saying that Leah has bitchface, and that it makes her unapproachable. Leah claims to be shocked that Mallory feels that way, despite the fact that it's exactly the same thing Mallory said in their discussion earlier this season that we saw in the previouslies. Leah says that this has never come up before, and no one has ever said that she's not understanding. Mallory says she's putting herself out there. Leah interviews that she doesn't know why Mallory is doing this, and that it's pointless, and that it's just Mallory talking and talking to make a moot point. Mallory says that she feels like Leah won't be okay with her. Leah bitches that it's totally fine, and walks off.
time: Christina and Ace fight. President Bush gives his speech about Iraq and Simon and Leah argue over United States intervention. Also, Leah seems to blame Saddam Hussein for the September 11th attacks. Which hardly makes her unique.
Over the credits, we get to see the roommates sledding in Switzerland and wiping out, which is awesome.