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After she went stabbing her dad it's kind of time for Remy to get some sleep clinic-type help. In the first consultation, the doctor reveals that Remy's been dreaming about the Preacher and the knife since she was seven, which unlocks some memories. With the support of Luke and her dad, she goes through the first round of sleep with just the hint of a demonic visitation -- but once the doctor introduces sleep drugs into the equation, she ends up sitting down for tea with the Preacher while her body falls apart.
Enter Miranda, who -- after Caleb trades threats with Uncle Collins, who pleads ignorance to the spirit jar situation -- is once again freed from the grounds. Although she's now contending with PTSD/hallucinations of her death, she's able to hack into Remy's dangerous dreams, saving her from the Preacher -- just as it was getting interesting -- and eventually getting all three of them back into the waking world. (Of course, the only one anybody can see is Remy, and Miranda loses track of the Preacher in the meantime).
What we learn from the very charismatic Preacher is that the Five are chosen for specific reasons, rather than at random, and the same forces in the waking world are responsible for the Mayor's death and the reappearance of the knife. He supplies a lot of the questions the Five should be asking -- the ones The Grunwald seems to think they'll never get to -- but in the end, he just gets real shitty on Remy and says a bunch of mean/demonic stuff, so it's not a huge loss that he's been taken momentarily off the board. Interestingly, the only thing he's not sure about is how Remy was able to time-travel to the Pact in the first place, which makes me wonder what/who else is involved in her dream powers: Odds are it's Esther, via the Mysterious Baby necklace -- it's hugely present again in this episode, and even provides Miranda with her way in.
Olivia starts the day still trying to track down the missing Dillon, but soon enough she and Tess are having a hospital shenanigan of their own, when they go to see if Springer has anything interesting to say. He doesn't, because he's in a coma, but his mother's freakout leads Remy's dad to explain Springer's secrets to Olivia: Mayor Matheson put his father in jail before he even knew him, a secret which may have led him to ally with Team Max in the beginning. After Uncle Collins arrives (and makes an apparent attempt on Springer's life) the boy finally wakes, telling Olivia he was forced to plant the knife at her house on Dillon's orders.
Running support for all of this drama are the stalwart Caleb and Luke, hacking phones like back in Rosewood and eventually following a Beatrice clue to the office of Mr. Ben Price, where we learn the backstory of H. A. Armitage: Town benefactor, high school namesake, spiritualist kook of some renown and author of the Lovecraftian tome Unseen Forces. Since Caleb's starting school week, it seems we'll be following up with Mr. Price moving forward.
So what's up? I loved it. Caleb and Miranda's friendship, fraught though it may be, is the heart of the show -- as it should be -- and watching him sweetly help her through her feelings of displacement and dead-person FOMO was pretty soothing. Olivia and Tess make an adorable team of teen detectives, and it was nice to see Livvy so willing to be compassionate with both her former best frenemy and recent attacker at a moment's notice. (Her soft "hi" when Springer finally wakes up was probably my favorite moment of the entire episode.) Luke threw down not a once this week, nor did he burst into tears at all, but he still managed to be the strongest and most comforting presence on the show.
Collins made his few moments onscreen count (dracula) as usual, although in the Hot Old department I'm afraid he's got some unexpected competition in the raven-exploding form of Father Gabriel Abbadon. And of course you've got Remy, who makes sure to look fucking amazing before showing up for her psych eval, prepares herself for violent sleep with the dedication of a Dream Warrior, and has zero problem talking shit right to the devil's face, once she's tired of his BS. All in all, a very fun episode that maybe didn't answer too many questions, but asked just enough (finally and out loud) to feel almost weighty.
Week: Caleb's first day of school proves "awkward" when Miranda does some Miranda-type thing, and Mr. Price continues to provide guidance as Caleb explores Ravenswood's creepy-ass history. Collins pleads with somebody to let him help her, which I'm assuming is Mama Matheson but really could be anybody. Dillon finally shows up, putting Olivia through the wringer -- dare we hope for a double-agent situation? -- and eventually causing strife between the Mathesons when Remy also jumps aboard the Blame Dillon train. Just two episodes left!
Want more? The full recap starts right below!PREVIOUSLY
The same knife used in the Pact ritual was used to kill Mayor Matheson, and recently showed up back on his family's property. Remy saw this in a time-traveling, scarecrow-beset dream -- one she's possibly been having her whole life. Olivia reconnected with her old bestie Tess, and finally slept with Dillon before he disappeared. Uttering strange warnings, Springer got run over in a drunken state. Miranda made contact with The Grunwald's ghostly Teen Mom, who gave her back her soul jar so she'd leave well enough alone. Something tells me she will not.
CARRIAGE HOUSE
Caleb: "Hey, is that your hair-jar?"
Miranda: "Beatrice gave it to me! But not in a nice way."
Caleb, awesomely: "Last time you got out, you were tricked by literal demons into a literal haunted house, so."
Miranda: "I know a few more things now than I did back then. Like, fake ghost moms are fake, and glowing doorways are no good."
Caleb: "That is two things out of infinite things. Just be careful."
Miranda: "I hate being on this show but not being on this show! You guys get evil scarecrows and haunted barns and underground vaults, what do I get? Nothing, as usual. I like the Kelly Rowland of us. Destiny's Orphan."
Caleb: "Then what's the holdup?"
Miranda, inscrutably: "I'm not afraid of what's out there, I'm afraid of what's in here."
Caleb: "Is this about being in love with me some more, or...?"
Miranda: "What if Collins just keeps digging my dead ass up and putting more hair in this jar? I can't be bald for eternity, that would bite."
Caleb: "Oh yeah, I am definitely going to start some shit with him. BRB."
SLEEP CLINIC
Remy: "Remember earlier this evening when I stabbed my dad?"
Luke: "That's not exactly what happened. I mean, you barely got him."
Remy: "I know it was technically an accident, but what if it's only technical? Maybe when I fall asleep I become... Evil's puppet?"
Luke: "First of all, I love that you said that. Second of all, you did try to stab my eyeballs out of my head, so you might be onto something. Which is why we're here."
Remy: "Good thing I had the presence of mind to get myself looking flawless before we hopped in the car."
Luke: "It's true. Even for you, you look amazing. So anyway I'll just fill out this form for you... External factors which may be contributing to ongoing sleep disturbances."
Remy: "Is there a box for century-old Pact that is cursing you and your friends to death?"
Luke: "Uh, Other?"
Remy: "This is a lot more fun with you around. You're a pretty funny guy when you're not weeping uncontrollably or beating on people."
Luke: "Yes, on those rare occasions I'm pretty cool."
THE VAULT
Olivia, to voicemail: "Hey Dillon, it's me again. This is just a question, okay?"
Tess: "Oh, girl. No."
Olivia: "Have you gotten any of my many messages about how Springer says your evil? NBD I just want to know, call me when you can. PS, this is not about you taking my virginity and then vanishing like some kind of Angelus asshole. It's strictly a question, as I mentioned earlier. Um, peace."
Tess: "So remind me what happened right before I rammed Springer right in the honey-roasted penis."
Olivia: "He was so crazy it was crazy! All this shit about Dillon, and my mom, and why he did it..."
Tess: "Did what?"
Olivia: "I know, right? At the time I just wanted to get away from all his drunk words and explanations about my life's saddest memories, but on reflection I kind of wish I'd been paying attention."
Olivia: "Anyway, now Mom's gotta find a guardian for us, in case she has to 'go away' for a while."
Tess: "That would be handled by the lawyer Collins found for her?"
Olivia: "Yeah, which is a whole weird other thing."
Please, please, please let Uncle Collins be their temporary guardian. I would give literally a jar of my own hair to see that shit happen. The babysat becomes the babysitter. And the whole time you're wondering, and eventually the Twins start wondering, if he is just actually their dad. Can you not see it? Uncle Collins, making vampire pancakes and screwing it up, Olivia's refusing carbs, Luke only likes them in the shape of Mickey Mouse like his dead dad used to do, and Collins is just getting more and more frustrated, calling The Grunwald every five minutes until she turns off her phone so he'll have confidence in his parenting and problem-solving abilities, and the whole time they aren't sure how much they are loving making him mad vs. how much of it is that they are secretly coming to love him, and then before you know it they are a kind of family: Collins talks Olivia through her post-virgin experience; helps a begrudging Luke keep his GPA up so he doesn't get thrown off the team, whatever team, and Caleb has to move into the main house to keep shit going there, and he and Miranda form a warm relationship with The Grunwald and Beatrice, and eventually the four of them have to set aside their drama and band together when they take in a foster child: A little girl named Max with nowhere to go.
I can taste it.
Olivia: "Cop, what is going on with my mom?"
Clark: "Secret stuff. They've done tests on the knife but the full report is out."
Olivia: "Tell me more things you shouldn't be telling me."
Clark: "Your mom's alibi doesn't check out."
Olivia: "Thanks, this was really upsetting and unhelpful."
Tess: "Where ya going? I'm still drinking my Nancy Botwin iced latte."
Olivia: "Where I am going is, to shake down Springer. It has come to my attention that he has the answers I seek, based on how he kept trying to tell me them."
Tess chases her out of the Vault and it is adorable, she makes this squeaky noise and it's so great. I am really coming to love both of those girls. I like how Olivia is like, always so hardcore about doing things, but never has any idea how to do them. I feel that.
COLLINS
Collins: "Uh, I am totally reading this ancient tome. Why are you throwing around tiny jars of hair?"
Caleb: "Are you saying you don't recognize this jar of hair?"
Collins: "For sure that is what I'm saying."
Caleb: "I will take this hair out of this jar, I swear to God."
Miranda: "He ain't blinkin'."
Caleb: "If anything happens to anyone that I love... If you touch one hair on their heads..."
Collins: "I don't respond to idle threats. I've seen more than you could possibly imagine, and I don't blink easily."
Miranda poltergeists suddenly, and a vase explodes. Nobody reacts, because nobody ever reacts to that shit on this show. But I guess Collins flinched just enough that Caleb considers this a victory: Like now Miranda is his personal Beatrice (hmm) that will be scaring his enemies through unseen force. Here's how that should have gone:
Caleb: "I don't have all the answers, but I don't like how you're controlling the activities of my dead friend without explaining it. Please stop doing weird stuff to us, if you can at all help it. Also, thank you for letting me live here rent free and giving me a car, even though I am a complete stranger to you, because I am just a teenager with no job experience. You are a pretty good guy from what I can tell. Ya jerk!"
When they get back to the carriage house, somebody -- Beatrice maybe, based on the burning smell and the smoke in the room -- has scrawled fire-words on the wall behind a vanity: UNSEEN FORCES! Those two, those optimistic twinsies, immediately assume that Beatrice has overheard their confrontation with Collins -- which only barely relates to her at all, really -- and now wants to help them. But in that way she has of not bothering to assume her human form that can have conversations, because why bother.
SLEEP CLINIC
Dr. Russell is Remy's new doctor, a kind-eyed woman who thinks Remy is like the most interesting person in the world, which of course she is.
Dad: "Sleepwalking, sleep drawing -- which, is that a thing? -- writing in languages I'm pretty sure she doesn't know..."
Doc: "Yeah, she has so many sleep symptoms we don't have names for all of them, and that's an issue. But also, not sleeping is fucking her right up, so I want to focus on that."
Remy: "Mom said she wouldn't tell anybody I stopped sleeping."
Doc: "Your mind's a busy place. It always has been... I think this is all one life-long nightmare thing you've got going on, based on your files."
Remy: "My doctor when I was seven, Dr. Elmore, he had tiki masks on his wall, I remember."
Doc: "Do you remember drawing this fucked-up picture of a preacher standing over your bed? For some reason you have a beard in it, but possibly that's because kids are just not that great at art."
CARRIAGE HOUSE
The full title of the book Beatrice was apparently suggesting is, Unseen Forces: An Unabridged & Personal History Of Ravenswood Township, by its native son H. A. Armitage. (Henry Armitage, which we talked about before because it's also the name of the high school, is the Miskatonic librarian in Lovecraft's "Dunwich Horror," tasked with protecting the Necronomicon from unworthy eyes. The whole story -- specifically that one -- is very Ravenswood, once you get into it.)
Caleb: "A reference to an unholy book that is itself an unholy book? This should go well. I bet they have this at the school library."
Miranda: "Neither of us have library cards."
Caleb: "We'll cross that bridge."
She sits around as he heads out, forgetting that she's becoming a free ghost once again, and he cutely is like, "Uh, come on." It's cute, his little ghost buddy and that, but you have to wonder about the etiquette. Like, you don't want your ghost buddy to be too impulsive or chatty, because that'll make you seem like you have an illness or a weirdness and then nobody will want to talk to you. Like being friends with the Matheson Twins isn't already a popularity death sentence, but you gotta stack your own deck. You know?
EXT. HOSPITAL
Remy: "Weirdly, I didn't remember any of this very specific stuff had already happened to me ten years ago, until she showed me that messed up picture. The nightmare was always the same, a man standing near my bed."
Quote "...all shadows and intention." Clearly the best line of the episode.
Remy: "Same knife. Same guy. Pact knife, your dead-dad knife. That knife gets around."
Luke: "I am kind of getting into this. I mean, how weird."
Remy: "Oh, it gets weirder. I know for a fact that he was real. Scarecrow real."
Luke: "So it's not even a dream, it's a memory? Good thing he didn't get you."
Olivia: "Well, nothing from the cops so far. I'm coming up there to talk to Springer."
Luke: "Your attacker?"
Olivia: "Reports of his aggression maybe were maybe overstated, looking back. I think he was trying to apologize for something, or expunge some kind of guilt, or... Anyway, see you in a bit. Tess is here but I won't let her bother you."
SPRINGERS
Momma Springer: "Get the fuck away from my son's room. You! Runner over of sons! You! Matheson Trash!"
Ladies: "Whoa, ma'am. Comin' in hot."
Momma: "Take a look at him! In his goddamn coma! I thought you Mathesons had already ruined us enough, but I guess you're not finished. What is it about the Mathesons? Why are you always smashing other people's lives?"
Olivia: "I'm intrigued."
Mr. Beaumont: "-- Dolores, how are you? Is Zachary okay?"
Momma: "Stay away from these Mathesons, Simon Beaumont. You'll lose it all."
Mr. Beaumont: "I have made my peace with the Mathesons, but thanks for your concern."
Olivia: "Remy's dad, what the hell was that?"
Mr. Beaumont: "Ask your mother."
Olivia: "I can't do that right now, obviously. Just spill."
Mr. Beaumont: "No. Ask me in five minutes near the vending machines and maybe I will have changed my mind for no reason."
Olivia: "Done."
Olivia: "Remy's dad, what the hell was that?"
Mr. Beaumont: "Before your dad was Mayor, he was the City Attorney. He put Springer's dad in jail, and Dolores raised him alone without anybody knowing about the dad part. When Springer found out..."
Olivia: "You mean, when somebody told him. He turned on my family, and..."
Mr. Beaumont: "Your dad was just doing his job. And he was good at it. But when you get things done as a politician, you make enemies. Sometimes a whole cult going back a hundred years just takes a dislike to you, and then boom. Stabbed to death."
REMY
A lovely nurse named Liam wires Remy up for the night, while Luke looks on and Dr. Russell explains the situation: Everybody will watch her sleep outside, but it's just normal baseline this time. No drugs, no anything. Just Remy, trying to fall asleep in a strange place with just a teddybear and a haunted necklace, in the middle of the daytime.
Doc: "Your pulse is racing, what's the deal?"
Remy: "Well, my nightmares are real. I mean, they seemed as if."
Doc: "Barring any centuries-old hot preachers from Hell, you're probably talking about a hypnagogic hallucination. Body wakes up, mind's still dreaming."
Remy: "That sounds both horrible and exactly like everything that's happened to me since Miranda showed up in town. So okay."
THE GROUNDS
Caleb: "Okay, before we open the jar and go through the gates, I'm gonna need one more sign of enthusiastic consent."
Miranda: "I can't protect you if I'm hiding in that house."
Caleb: "Heh, gay."
Miranda: "No, I mean, like all of you. Our Five. It drives me nuts."
Caleb: "Let me know if you see anything weird or strange, besides everything."
Ravens immediately start wheeling around in the sky and the gates swing shut behind them of their own accord and the leaves rise up in the air and assume quick shapes, of men and beasts and strange things in between, for only moments before they are gone. A fox dances on its hind legs, inscribing strange movements in the dust. The trees bend, like women at the river, under a nonexistent wind. A bird flies backward across the treeline to a nest, folding itself back into an egg like impossible origami. A wet and rustling-dry sound, all at once.
Miranda: "...Nope. Same old Ravenswood bullshit so far."
DREAM #1
First she thinks she's still awake, then she heads out of the room and ends up in her very comfy child bedroom. After watching Baby Her sleep for a while, grinning softly, she feels the Preacher's approach. She screams at him to get away, and he seems to comply, but then jumps out of a closet behind her, dragging her back.
SPRINGER
While Tess adorably bothers the desk clerk, Olivia sneaks into Springer's room but he won't wake up. She snags his phone, just as Tess texts her to hide, and then finds a weird recording that somehow ended up on the phone. I don't know how, but she takes it immediately to Caleb at the Vault to talk about it.
"I planted the knife, wasn't that enough?"
Olivia: "So that's Springer, and then it cuts out right before I can tell Dillon's the one yelling at him..."
Caleb: "I'll hack the SIM card faster than you can say teddybear nannycam, don't you worry."
Miranda: "Hey, I'm here. I opened my hair-jar."
Olivia: "Good for you, girl. Listen, my dad sent Springer's dad to jail."
Caleb: "I don't know any of these people so I'm not sure what my reaction should be."
Olivia: "It was a secret that he even had a son. So whoever told him about it was definitely sending him after us. Poor violent fuckwad."
Miranda hallucinates a bunch of horrible shit, including her being a wet zombie and the usual variety of scary things, but most interestingly, PTSD flashbacks to the end of the pilot when she drove them all into the river like a jackass.
What if Miranda somehow is Wet Demon Girl? Like her own banshee or something, her doom reaching back to complete itself in the past? She was the only one who saw that one, remember? Sometimes Olivia would be around the Ghost Fingers, but only Miranda ever saw her exact death following her around all day before she died. Leading her on.
REMY
Remy: "Thank goodness my mom taught me lucid dreaming in five minutes, or I might not have had any boogeyman control at all. Not that he really cared that much."
Luke: "So he's real, we're still thinking? Definitely part of the Curse. He scarecrowed us hard in the real world. Could be he's even more powerful in dreams, or in your mind or whatever."
Remy: "Maybe he has answers, then?"
Luke: "Come on, like you're going to have a cute little tea party with his hot ass?"
Remy: "Stranger things, my love, have occurred in Ravenswood Township of late."
Luke: "Or maybe it's a trap."
Remy: "It's all a trap. It's always going to be a trap. We can't let that be the determining factor anymore. Look, what if he can tell us who killed your dad?"
Luke: "That would be awesome, but not if you die of sleep deprivation. Take meds if they offer."
Remy: "I kind of want to keep my home-court advantage, since I'll be hosting this tea party in my own wacky brain. And either way he's not letting me rest. We've seen too much, if you'll recall last week's thorough eyeball/Bible-verse motif about that."
PRICE
Caleb and Miranda loudly exposit to each other what happened immediately to this scene -- even though one of them is invisible, and both of them were there -- which is that the school librarian sent them to Ben Price's office, where he keeps all manner of antiquities: Books, enough to fill a Billy shelf, and a small suit of armor, etc. It's like Giles's library but about the size of a half-bath.
Ben Price: "Random Lovecraft reference just in case you weren't following. And hey, why are you in my office?"
Caleb: "I ... am a student? With questions? I was told to come here?"
Ben Price: "I'm a teacher! Why are you in my office!? The door was open!"
Caleb: "Yeah, I don't see the problem. But anyway, can I see this book?"
Ben Price: "You should have emailed me instead of entering my office through an open door!"
As skeptical as Ben Price is about the concept of shared space, he is even more skeptical about Unseen Forces and its eccentric author. Turns out Armitage is a well-known crank, a mystic and occultist who was only acceptable because he had shit-tons of money, which he spent on things such as this building we are standing in.
This is the point where the conversation really goes off the rails. The basics are that Price is a skeptic and prefers real history and facts, and doesn't believe in ghosts, while Caleb used to be all of those things and now is none of those things, with the added bonus of Miranda standing around being talked about like she's not in the room, because technically she isn't. It's an ambitious list of things to get across in a fairly short scene, so let's just focus on the intentions and not the result and then blow right past it, like so:
Miranda: "I couldn't even pay attention to him shit-talking ghosts and ghost-friends, due to more hallucinations. Did he say anything else?"
Caleb: "Just that he doesn't believe in ghosts, but they're assholes either way. And I am pathetic for being best friends with a ghost. Unless you're not totally lame, which he seemed to think is a foregone conclusion. But also, none of it was real to him. He was just being super intense about a thing he doesn't actually care about, kind of like him riding my ass about being in here all normal-like. Like he had never had a conversation before, or like he thought we were talking about a lot of things we weren't actually talking about and I didn't know what they were? It was weird, but not that interesting."
Miranda: "Gotcha. Listen, I kind of hate being a free ghost now that I have experienced it. Before, I went straight to the school auditorium and immediately got Max-trapped, but this time, wandering around the world, it turns out that that's sucky. Just FYI."
OLIVIA
Uncle Collins shows up at the hospital -- where, of course, they know him -- and without a whole lot of screwing around, abruptly kills Springer. It's pretty baller.
I mean, eventually they get him back, but the way Collins just induces some kind of brain stroke in the kid and then swags out through the Code Blue rush of nurses and doctors, it's lovely. Maybe he woke him up with that and didn't mean to kill him? Who knows. The way he was talking about Springer before, it could go either way. But in any case, Olivia and Tess catch all of this from the worst possible angle, adding more strife to an already vexed relationship between one girl and her dracula.
DREAM #2
Doc: "Imagine a stronger version of melatonin. That's what I am putting in you."
Remy: "I will still dream?"
Doc, weirdly: "What good is sleep without dreams?!"
Very operatic and strange. I like this lady's vibe. Later, Mr. Beaumont comes to tell Remy goodnight again, and Luke arrives just in time to hear some super sweet talk about him, before blushingly coming all the way in the room.
Luke: "If you get in any trouble, wake yourself up. Promise me."
Remy: "Well, no point telling you about the weaponized melatonin in me now. Okay."
This time, Baby Remy is gone. But in the corner, a horrible scary clown just sits there, breathing, waiting, and getting scoffed in a brutal fashion: "Sorry to disappoint you, but I'm missing the scared-of-clowns gene?" Soon enough, things go from bad to worse, Preacher Gabriel falls on her out of the ceiling, and all three of them -- Luke, Nurse Liam and Dr. Russell -- are clustered around like twelve video screens of shit going on in her head.
When the hyperventilating starts, Luke gets antsy -- Dr. Russell being no fan of his from the start, for some unknown reason -- and runs in there. "Call security!" Russell barks at Liam, and they hustle him out of the room. Simon joins the party, and they all stare down at a writhing, freaking Remy.
In the dream she's wearing the necklace and silly frilly pink matchy-pajamas, and the Preacher is... Up close, he's good-looking indeed. I will be surprised if he's not blood-related to Dillon, it's too perfect. And yep: Offering her tea, at a tiny kid's table. Love this show, so much.
CARRIAGE HOUSE
Caleb: "Oh well, we'll find another copy of that book."
Miranda: "I am pouting hard and it is not about that."
Caleb: "Okay, we're talking about you now."
Miranda: "It is very hard to be Buffy Summers when you don't have a body to knock monsters around with. I feel shitty and dumb and depressed all the time. You're going to make friends at school, and eventually you're moving in with Uncle Dad, and then I'll be alone and useless."
Caleb: "(G-rated, not-quite-flirting, that gets her back upright again.)"
Miranda: "Okay fine, I was just sucking for a second. I'm back."
The Fivers call from the hospital to update him on everything going wrong, and meanwhile a tea kettle goes nuts on the stove, and when Miranda looks closer she sees a shot of Remy -- from about five minutes in the future of us -- reflected in it, and somehow realizes that Remy is having a bad time on the etheric plane:
Miranda: "Girl, we need to find Remy."
Caleb: "Dur, she's at the hospital."
Miranda: "No, Caleb. We need to find her."
I wonder if the tea kettle is because of Gabriel's adorable tea party, or this is one of the good ghosts using whatever's around, or maybe this show just has a dart board of weird or scary things -- or regular things that make weird or scary noises -- and this one was it today.
"Then how does Miranda figure out Remy's trapped in dreamland?"
"A picture could fall off the wall."
"What would the picture be of?"
"Um, a preacher making tea? But like, evil tea."
"Cool, I like it, but let's pin that one and keep spitballing."
"...I got it. A reflection of Remy hollering, in a teakettle that is freaking out. That's a twofer because of the screaming noise. I don't think a teakettle has gone off yet this episode."
"Is the clown drinking tea? What is the clown doing at this time?"
GABRIEL
Q: "You were in my room that night when I was seven, why?"
A: "Keeping track of the Lambs."
Q: "But why choose me, or any of us? Are we the smartest, the weakest? Are our names written on little white balls spinning in a cage?"
A: "It's certainly not random. Debts are owed. You should not have seen..."
This last intense, shaking; almost sad. Man I love this dude. He is awesome. I would have dollhouse tea parties with him at like any time. You name it. I don't have any friends at all right now that are immortal, bodiless, demonic preachers from Colonial America and I'll be honest with you, it's starting to bum me out. In his little hat, with his dear grumpy little face. Oh my God, I love this show. He hasn't even started playing Spin The Bottle with the ritual knife yet and it's already the high point of the season.
Olivia: "They're saying it was a blood clot with Springer, but I'm happy to blame Collins either way."
Caleb: "Yeah, me too. What a jerk that generous and attractive dracula father-figure is."
Miranda: "If anybody's interested, my powers now include telling me Springer's gonna pull through."
Caleb: "Cool story, bro. What's going on with Remy? And is Luke okay?"
A: "You've always been special to me."
Q: "Because I woke up? I saw you holding that knife..."
A: "I'm the dealmaker, I'm not the murderer."
Q: "Then who is? Collins?"
A: "The town does its part."
I love everything about this, but especially this part, which is where Remy hits a wall in her patience with his nonsense.
Q: "ENOUGH with the cryptic Q&A. I don't care how you picked us, we broke your damn Pact."
A: "Nope."
Q: "We're alive, though."
A: "Uh, some of you. For a while. But things change. Accidents, illnesses. Sometimes people even die in their sleep."
This part I love less, where Gabriel hits a wall with his frustration and just gets very aggressive and abusive and out of bounds, but somehow also even more charming: "You wanna know why you? Because you're full of fear, it makes you irresistible. Your boyfriend wants someone else, your father thinks you're crazy. Your mother would be a pile of ashes and dog tags if it wasn't for me! There is a debt on the books. And I always collect."
The part about the mom is true. Dad too. Actually, we've not gotten back to the Tess thing with Luke, so I guess that could be true in a way Luke doesn't know about yet? But would kind of suck, because as great as Tess is, nobody compares to Remy Beaumont.
Out in what we think of as the real world, they are pumping her with Lorazepam and preparing to intubate. Nobody knows what's going on, and she's dying right there in the bed. So Miranda, still operating on her ghostly intuition, grabs that necklace and does some kind of psychometry that shoves her through a bunch of recent memories before depositing her in the dream, behind Gabriel at the little doll table. Where he sets it spinning, of its own accord.
Q: "Oh, this knife?"
A: "Yeah. How did it seal the Pact? Who killed Luke's father? Who planted it?"
Q: "Wait, hold up. How'd you witness the Pact? Do you even know?"
A: "Huh. You're really freaked out by that, huh? Good thing I'm hypnotized by it so you know I'm not lying when I stare blankly at you instead of answering."
Q: "Who helped you?"
I'm gonna say Collins. Anyway, Miranda conks Gabriel with a bedroom lamp, and grabs Remy as she's snapping out of it, dragging her back into the closet. How did Miranda do this? Interesting question for another time. Where do they go? The closet stretches back, forever, in one direction, and Remy will say only, "I don't know where that goes."
Gabriel pounding at the door, they run off down the halls, and then go around corner after corner. It's meant to be an unending maze -- Remy cutely apologizes for having read so much Narnia back in the day -- but clearly it's reused for the shots so it feels more like those repeating backgrounds in a Scooby Doo. Eventually, Gabriel at their heels, they reach a black space into nothing. Remy jumps, waking up finally; Gabriel grabs Miranda before she can follow.
Gabriel: "You are more trouble than you're worth."
Miranda: "It's my main thing, bitch."
Gabriel: "Let's get better acquainted. IN HELL!"
Miranda: "I don't know how I am the dream-hacker all of a sudden, but I do know when to make my exit. Let's go."
They tumble out into the blackness, screaming, but when Miranda gets back to the Five she's alone. It's sad! For me. Not so much for them. Come back soon, Gabriel! I am interested in learning more about your point of view! I can't believe your dad is Vir Cotto and you played Henry Armitage's backup in a TV-movie version of "The Dunwich Horror" in 2009! That is all so crazy! What are the odds?
AFTER
Luke: "Wait, so now you just pack up and go home?"
Remy: "It was just supposed to be a 24-hour observation, now they have to go through all my readings and stuff."
Luke: "Not that it'll be tremendously helpful to them. Take it from one who in the very recent past embraced their skeptical, non-demon-centric view of the human mind."
Remy: "I don't know if Miranda moved the needle out here, but she was boss in there."
Luke: "She's pretty great."
Remy: "Sorry I got hypnotized and almost died before I could find out about your dad."
Luke: "I am glad you did not die. The rest of it is whatever."
Remy: "He is all about that knife. He said he was the dealmaker..."
Luke: "Maybe we can use the knife to break this deal."
Remy: "Yeah or maybe we can stay the hell away from demonic artifacts for like one second."
CARRIAGE HOUSE
Miranda: "At least temporarily, he's out of her head. But that dude is very old and very good at ... whatever his job actually is."
Caleb: "I bet Remy could use the sleep. You know everybody thinks you're the VP tonight, right?"
Miranda: "It's comforting."
Caleb, verbatim: "I was thinking about what Price said. There's lots of books out there, but this story, it hasn't been written yet."
Miranda: "Oh, Caleb. That was really sweet. I don't have any idea what you meant by it, but I am touched you said it."
Caleb: "I am drowsy. I guess I'll tell Olivia that SIM card was a no-go tomorrow. I hope she finds some answers about her family. Those Twins are high-maintenance but their life is a shit sandwich and I'm glad we can watch out for them. Wake me up for school, okay?"
Miranda: "Sure, because I've got nothing else going on. Literally."
Once she shut up about her reincarnation dead girl love, it got really sad and painful to watch. That's funny. I guess the moral of the story is, shut up about things that are important unless you can do something about them. That way people will respect you, instead of just finding you insufferable and/or tragic. I wish somebody would have told me that when I was this age, because whoa doggy I could have given Miranda a run for her money in the self-obsessed drama department back then.
("Back then," LOL.)
SPRINGER
When Springer wakes up, Olivia's there returning his phone. He says her name and she jumps, but then says "Hi" in a very soft, tender way. Not like she is his best friend, but not like she's hungry for answers either: Just like she's very glad he isn't a dead person. My favorite moment of the episode, this beleaguered girl looking down at a broken person who has tortured her for so long and just being like, "Hey there." Just nailed it.
Springer: "Okay, you need to know what I know, about your dad. First, sorry that went down like that."
Olivia: "Okay but -- thanks, but -- what actually went down, and what is with the knife? Is that still part of the revenge, or..."
Springer: "He made me do it, all of it."
Olivia: "Average height? Big floppy hat? Prone to exploding into ravens?"
Springer: "What? No. Dillon."
Olivia: "...Huh."
WEEK
Dillon finally comes back, but Remy and Luke are on the case slash his jock! On his first day of school, Ben Price sends Caleb -- along with his ghost best bud -- prying into Collins's many secrets once again, uncovering new info on the Pact. And, fingers crossed, Collins pilots an umbrella into the Mathesons' yard, whistling up a mighty wind to blow the rest of the governess applicants far, far away before moving right in.
JACOB CLIFTON is a freelance writer and critic based in Austin, Texas. He currently recaps The Good Wife, True Detective, The Blacklist, Ravenswood, and Pretty Little Liars for TWoP. Jacob can be found online at jacobclifton.com, Twitter, and Facebook.