Previously: The designers had to create a design for one of their fellow designers. Santino totally annoyed Nick (and everyone else too, really) with his incessant poo talk; which, upon further reflection, really makes me laugh. C'mon! Poo. It's a laugh-getter. Chloe won the challenge with her design for Nick. Santino and Nick were in the bottom two. Sorry kids, Uncle Nick has gone to heaven.
It's morning at the Atlas apartments and Chloe and Kara are rehashing the runway show's drama. Kara describes how, on the runway, Santino was apparently ordering her, under his breath, to hide the flaws in the sleeve that he had poorly sewn. If Santino makes it to the final three, Chloe wonders who will sew his garments, since he doesn't seem to have any machine sewing skills. Well, how do they do it in the "third world"? With magic?
"That man would kill his young to go the final three." That's Kara that said that. Wow, harsh, huh? At the same time, killing babies doesn't seem like it would be all that high-stakes for Santino. He doesn't seem like much of a kid guy. Now, if you asked him to burn the taxidermy collection that you know he's got hanging in his apartment, then we'd have a measure of how far he'll go. Kara edits her statement a bit and says, "He would walk over anyone, as far as I'm concerned."
Apartment 35D. Daniel brushing his teeth. No shirt. I think that, besides the tattoo on his right arm, he's got one on his back -- near his left shoulder. I hate myself for caring. I love Project Runway.
Daniel is pissed at Santino and doesn't want to talk to him anymore. He hopes that the final three consists of himself, Kara, and Chloe. My shirtless Daniel buzz is killed by a shot of Santino in briefs. Sorry. Santino's a striking guy and good-looking in his own way. To somebody, I guess. He does look nice with a cleaner shave. He interviews that everyone "has contempt" for him now, but he doesn't care. This is his "time to shine." Kind of like bookends of shining, I guess.
At the runway, Heidi -- looking lovely per usual and ready to pop -- greets the designers. She's a busy lady, so she gets right to the meat of the matter. Their challenge is to create an evening gown that represents the line that they would show at Fashion Week. Daniel, kind of stunned, snaps and says, "Yeah, just like that." It does seem a little unrealistic to expect them to conceptualize their entire line in the thirty minutes to an hour that Tim Gunn will give them to sketch and think. At the same time, they should probably just interpret the challenge as "design a dress that would make people want to see more of your stuff." Translations like that? That's why I'm a famous and revered fashion designer. Of course, if they did that, then changed course in the process of creating their line, they'd run the risk of having Michael Kors say, "This doesn't look anything like the dress you showed to us in the last challenge!" At that point, I'd fake a coughing fit and they would offer me a glass of water and forget what they were talking about. For real, people, I'm giving you the keys to success.
It's model-choosing time. Ooh, I wonder how this is going to go. It's Grace and Rachael. Grace looks as cool as a cucumber. Rachael seems to know that her time is up. And she's right. Rachael waves to everyone as she leaves the runway. Daniel says, "Thank you, baby." I really hope that Rachael has some friendly support when she sees Tim Gunn call her a marshmallow. Can you imagine? You're, like, at a viewing party or something and you're thinking you're looking all cute and Tim Gunn basically says you look disgusting. I can just see her in her party dress and tiara with some sort of noisemaker in one hand and a cocktail in the other -- Tim calls her "Gumby legs" and there's silence. Everyone turns to her as she slow-burns into tears, attempts to run out of the room, trips and falls into the big wooden bowl of Cheetos -- and it's her friend's house, she's made a mess at someone else's place, so there's that. There's really no way to win here. Take care, Rachael.
In the workroom, Tim Gunn greets the designers. He tells them that he's taking them to 7th on Sixth, the company that runs Olympus Fashion Week. Fern Mallis (what a great name, right?), the executive director of Fashion Week, is going to have a little Q & A with the designers.
At the offices of 7th on Sixth, the designers sit with Tim and Fern at a boardroom table. Fern explains that, as she is curating the shows that will be in the tents at Fashion Week, she looks for designers with unique points of view.
Santino asks if people remember the bad elements of a collection more than the good parts. Fern seems perplexed by this question and answers, "I think they've been pretty well trained to remember the good stuff. " Daniel asks for common beginner's mistakes and she says, ahem, "I can't ever underestimate being nice." Daniel, in an interview, says that, when he heard Fern say this, he shot an "I told you so" look to Santino. He did tell him so. Fern continues, "It doesn't help to be a bitch and to be nasty."
It's not clear if Santino's statement is in direct response to Fern's advice, but he says, "You can't be nice all of the time." I really love that. It's like, you know, nobody's perfect! "I wanna win this competition. Olympus Fashion Week is the Super Bowl of American fashion." Conversely, the Super Bowl would be the Fashion Week of American sports. Now I get it! I'd always wondered why there was so much fuss about some fancy new commercials surrounded by a football game. Instead, though, it's like the commercials are gift bags and the game is the part where you see really strange combinations of celebrities sitting together.
Fern bids the designers farewell, and they head back to Parsons and begin sketching. Chloe says that her dress (and therefore her line) will be an homage to 1940s Hollywood glamour. Kind of clichéd. Agreed? She does add in an interview that she wants "clean lines, nothing messy." That sounds more like what is interesting about her, but I'm a little worried about her. How MANY times have you heard the old "Hollywood glamour" bit? Done to death.
Daniel is a little more evocative in his description. He wants a "high-impact" look for the runway, which involves a high slit and flowing fabrics. It will also be body conscious, which he declares is "something [he is] kind of known for."
Santino's theme is "Hollywood" and "glamorous." You know the answer you gave for "How many times you've heard 'Hollywood glamour'"? Add one to that. I mean, I love Hollywood glamour too, but…what does that mean anymore? People have been saying that non-stop for years, so you're not "throwing back" to anything. You're reinterpreting the same thing that people are continuously reinterpreting. I guess you could make the argument that Hollywood is a rich enough theme to keep on revisiting, but why make it so hard for yourself? Just pick something else as a theme. It doesn't mean that someone in Hollywood can't wear your dress.
Kara is stumped. She doesn't really make eveningwear. It doesn't look like she has finalized her idea before Tim takes them shopping for fabric.
At Mood, everyone scurries. They have $300 for this challenge. That's their largest amount yet for a challenge. Santino chooses silk chiffon, tulle, and chiffon with gold paillettes. Familiar with paillettes? Me neither. They are like medallion-sized sequin thingies that hang from the fabric. They give the effect of humongo sequins. Chloe is using jersey. Kara still doesn't know where she's going. She tells Tim that she's "simple." He replies, "Then that's you. I just want this trip to be successful for all of you."
Back at Parsons. Daniel discusses Kara's design with her. She is going to have a racer back on her gown. Daniel says he loves the idea. Chloe is less gung-ho, but doesn't discourage her. We see Kara compliment Santino's chiffon with the gold paillettes, and he thanks her. Following, we see an interview with Santino where he says that, when Kara compliments him, he thanks her and "puts [his] head back down." Because he doesn't want to help her. I don't know, maybe Kara usually sucks people into helping her by complimenting them first. Otherwise, chill out. It's weird, Santino keeps saying that. Maybe the editors are hiding the footage, but it doesn't really look like people are begging for his help. He drones in his interview that "it's about our own individual vision, not about helping out someone else."
Kara says that they have all helped each other out throughout the competition, but Santino hasn't spoken to anyone for that day. They start talking about the upcoming elimination, and Daniel expresses his anxiety that he might be eliminated. Santino finally speaks up and says, "Well, auf wiedersehen." Everyone's appalled. Daniel interviews that Santino is very arrogant. ["I sort of read this as Santino thinking Daniel was fishing for everyone to say, 'Oh, no, you'll get to stay,' and got impatient with it." -- Sars] He adds that Santino should have been eliminated in the last challenge, not Nick. The mannequins are in absolute agreement.
As the time goes by, it looks like Kara is getting a handle on her design. Santino says, "I want to show amazing clothes." Hey, we'd all like that too. Match some clothes with that big talk of yours.
That night, when Daniel and Santino go back to their apartment, there is a message on their little chalkboard. It reads, "Good luck, Daniel. Make it to the top. Heart, Nick." Santino's all, "Don't talk about me like I'm not here!" Drink your juice, Shelby.
Once they are seated, we hear Santino say, "It's really unfortunate how fickle Nick became with me. I heard Nick say, 'Well at least my garment's not taped together or whatever.' Everybody's fucking garment was fucked up." Daniel replies, "No, it wasn't." Santino thinks that his was better anyway. Daniel replies, childishly if effectively, "Well, I just think you're lucky that they have bad eyesight, that's all." Santino is kind of stunned, because I don't think anyone has actually ever dished out what he's been serving this whole time. Santino, though interesting and arguably a very talented designer, seems like one of those people who disarm you with their crudeness. They put on this big show of how brash they are and don't expect anyone to ever call them on their bullshit. Maybe he's misunderstood, but I don't think so. We just hear him kind of stammer and reply to Daniel, "Whatever."
Daniel interviews that he thinks it's "sad" that Santino constantly touts the high quality of his designs, though they fall apart on the runway. He tells Santino that he can't sew. Santino just says, "Whatever," and walks away. Point, Daniel. Commercials.
The morning, Santino says that he's not going to feel bad and Daniel's just jealous and "I'm gonna say what I'm gonna say." Hmm. It looked to me like he couldn't handle what Daniel was saying, not the other way around. And: Daniel's jealous. Crazy. But Santino is making up his bed as we hear all of that. At least he's tidy. There's an uncomfortable moment at the bathroom as the two boys have weird eye contact. Daniel interviews that Santino seems like a "one-trick pony" to him and he hopes that the judges see through it. The gloves are off and these bitches got nails. For some reason, there's something really chilling about how they are dealing with each other. It's kind of satisfying.
At Parsons, Santino says that he needs to do his best. Tim arrives to consult. Kara, though indecisive, seems to be going through with the racer back for her evening gown. Reminds me of the time that Demi Moore wore biker shorts to the Oscars. Why don't people do shit like that anymore? Kim Basinger in the one-armed gown she MADE HERSELF? Those were the fucking halcyon days, my friends. When Lara Flynn Boyle in a tutu is the high-water mark for an entire decade, you know you're in a boring time. Tim tells Daniel that his design is looking "very Marlene Dietrich," which is a bad thing because Daniel wants his design to look modern, not period. Daniel interviews that he's aiming for a sort of sophistication that could work for someone who was twenty or fifty years old. Tim is not liking Chloe's design. He tells her that it looks like "a swimsuit with a towel wrapped around it." She seems to be standing by her idea, which she should know by now is the wrong thing to do. Always listen to Tim Gunn. I hope she's just playing it cool and makes some changes once he's gone.
Tim loves Santino's design, but he's worried about it being finished in time. Santino says that he doesn't care what Tim has to say, because his design is different from everyone else's. "And different is better."
Tim has a surprise for the designers. Iman is going to be the guest judge! She will be wearing the winning gown "on the red carpet at a big event." Everyone is really excited, and interviews about how they love Iman. Daniel says, "I can't wait to hear her talk. I love her voice." That's the kind of thing I love about Daniel.
Daniel says that he wants to win very badly, because it would jumpstart their careers. Chloe corrects him, "For you it would be jumpstarting your career." Apparently, she already has a pretty successful dress shop in Houston, so her career has already been jumpstarted. Then she says, "I'm still questioning whether I want it." Everyone, including the viewing audience, is stunned. "Then what the hell are you doing there?" one might ask. Now, I'm seeing some pissed-off eliminated designers at the reunion show. Kirsten Ehrig's gonna be all, "The whole world might have been able to see my ridiculous swimsuits had you not been standing in my way." Chloe continues, "I lived that life. It's a hard life." Daniel explains that Chloe isn't sure that she wants to be a celebrity.
Chloe interviews that she moved to New York when she was twenty and worked really hard. She moved back to Houston to have a balanced life. I mean, I guess I can understand that. She mentions that her sisters are going to slap her when they hear her expressing doubt. They might have been the people that pushed her into this competition in the first place. She adds that, now that she's close to the final three, she's freaking out.
Here's a scurry montage. Tim comes in and tells them that they are going on a field trip for their dinner break. It's raining outside and we see Tim and Daniel sharing an umbrella. That's cute. They go to the nightclub, Suede. Heidi greets them. It's a party. Their models are there, as well as Jay, Kara Saun, and Austin from the first season. Austin, what are you wearing?
Okay, Kara says the fucking weirdest thing to describe the party. It goes a little like this: "We just kind of sizzled down, with, you know, a little sizzler." What the HELL does that mean? Is that something you say in Cape Town? "Hey guys, come to my sizzler! Bring your own sizzlers!" I'm desperate to know what on earth she's talking about.
It looks like a fun group. Kara Saun and Daniel have a discussion about what the last challenge is like. She says you're tired, so you're likely to second-guess yourself. "Go back to that room and do what you have to do," is her advice to Daniel.
Jay is interviewing Santino. Like Kara Saun, Jay describes how poorly they did on their last challenge. Santino says that he thinks he has a good chance of winning, and Jay replies, "I hope you get canned." Rebecca and Heather are sitting there and burst out laughing. I think I see a future for Jay and Santino. Like a rough-trade Proenza Schouler.
We see Austin say, "You can never be too thin or too rich, I always say [as did Diana Vreeland]. I've got thin part down [twirls for effect]. I've just got to work on the riches." That was kind of hack-y. I don't remember Austin being quite so inauthentic. Out there, for sure, but it always seemed to come from a fairly honest place. Tim's laughing, but Heidi is just kind of staring at him and eating some nuts. She seems a little transfixed by the odd bib thing that Austin is sporting.
Chloe asks Kara Saun how her life has been changed. She replies that a large audience has seen her stuff.
Hey, Michael Kors is there. Kara (not Saun) tells Michael that she is glad to have met him. He says that fashion is about "what's new," so he is just as excited to have met all of the designers. That's a pretty nice thing to say. In the end, he toasts all of them and tells them that they've done a great job.
Back at Parsons, the probably drunk designers get back to work. Kara seems worried about her dress. Santino says in an interview that he thinks he is secured a spot in the final three simply because he has taken more risks than the others. Daniel thinks that Santino's gown is "over-designed."
Back at the apartments, the girls wonder about what will happen at the runway show. Chloe says that she doesn't get Santino's dress. "If he keeps adding paillettes, it's going to be a turkey." If things don't work out for Santino here, he may have a job waiting for him at Jim Henson's Muppet Factory, or whatever they call it.
In the boys' apartment, cattiest conversation ever. Santino wonders who will be "in" on the runway, Daniel or Kara -- because it's going to be one or the other. Then, he says something about how safe Daniel, Chloe, and Kara were with their designs. Finally, he says that he thinks Daniel "will be okay." Daniel, who can't be seen by Santino, puts his hand over his heart and makes an expression that says, "You think I'm going to be okay? Oh my God, I'm relieved. If I didn't have your support, Santino…I just don't know." Then Daniel snarks, "Thanks, I was hoping to just get by."
The morning, Kara asks Chloe if she's ready to rumble. Kara interviews that she is not sure if Chloe is passionate about her career.
In the workroom, they all get to work. Kara needs a little help getting her dress form out of the corner, and Santino won't help her. He's being really silly, honestly. So, she lugs the thing, which is about as big as she is, across the room and says, "Santino, sometimes you can be such a dick." Santino interviews that he couldn't help Kara because he was running the risk of wasting all of his time helping people instead of making "a very impressive outfit."
Tim enters and tells Chloe that he's disappointed. He thinks that the gown hugs the backside, but Chloe says that she wanted that. That's okay with Tim as long as she is prepared to say, "Nina, I wanted her to look like she had a big fat ass." I think this guy is a little bit over these people not taking his advice.
Tim is unhappy with Kara's gown as well. He says that there is nothing special about hers and Chloe's gowns. He seems to be fine with Daniel's dress. He tells Santino that his dress looks like a costume from the "Renaissance Fest." They show a little shot of Chloe smiling at that. I love it when they show the designers laughing at the criticism that another designer gets. I thought it was rude at first, but it has really grown on me. They've all become kind of nakedly honest about each other. I don't need it in the real world, but I like it in my reality television. Tim continues with Santino, saying that he has departed from his impossibly unique vision of "Hollywood glamour" and needs to get back to it. Geez, I think I might be more on the side of "Renaissance Fair" right now. They have an hour to get their models ready for the runway.
Santino says that he hopes that Michael Kors wasn't eavesdropping on Tim's consultation, so he can't say at the runway, "I don't know where you guys live, but it's like you guys live in a Renaissance Fair." Perfect Michael Kors. Why is he so good at that stuff?
Hair. Make-up. Scurry. Techno.
Chloe assures all of us in an interview that she does really want to be in the final three. Tim summons them to the runway. Commercials.
Oh my God, there's that fucking infuriating Dr. Phil "Guy Q" ad. Is it just me or is Dr. Phil like the biggest whore in the world now?
Heidi greets all of the designers on the runway. Haircut alert! Looking good, Mama. She introduces Michael Kors, Nina Garcia, and Iman. I do love me some Iman. Heidi reminds the designers that Iman will wear the winning designer's dress at a red carpet event.
The show begins with Kara's gown. It's floor-length and black and fitted. At the bottom of the dress, there is a little bit of a flare, where the fabric flows a bit. It is low-cut with halter-like straps that create a racer back. There was a sash Kara couldn't decide what to do with, so it's just tied around Eden's waist and trails down the back of the gown. It's a pretty dress, but, like Tim said, it's not special.
up is Santino's dress. Heather doesn't look like she can make it down the runway, the thing is so heavy. There are shoulder straps and a slightly plunging neckline. The collar has a little bit of cowling, to give a sort of draped effect. It's floor-length and the skirt is sort of full. On top of the already full skirt, there are triangulated panels of paillettes. The back dips into a V shape. There's asymmetrical placement of paillettes over the right side of the bust. It's an interesting idea, but it's poorly made. The materials don't seem transformed. Not that they should not look like chiffon and paillettes, but they don't come together to create a unified thing. It looks like paillettes on top of chiffon.
Chloe's design is . It's fairly plain, but it looks really nice on Grace, who may have some sort of pituitary disorder because: is she getting taller? The dress is silver silk charmeuse that's floor-length. The bodice is fitted and continues to below the seat area. Then there is a seam to which the skirt is attached. The skirt is fuller and moves pretty nicely on the runway. There are now sleeves. The bust is entirely covered except for a tiny open panel that is closed with a button at the neck. There is a ribbon around Grace's waist that is tied into a bow, and a large oval panel exposed on the model's back. The ribbon runs across Grace's exposed back. The seam does hug her backside. You can't really tell with someone as thin as Grace, but that could be a problem for a lot of figures. It could also probably flatter a few.
Bringing up the rear is Daniel's design. It is floor-length and midnight blue. There is a thigh-high slit in the middle, which provides for a lot of movement in the lower part of the dress. It fits loosely up to the waist. At the bodice, it becomes more fitted. The bust is low-cut with two thin straps at the shoulders. In the back, the straps criss-cross. Fits nicely, but BORING.
Once the designers are onstage, the models return to stand by their designers. Heidi says that Kara will be questioned first. Now, listen to Iman. She thinks you should steam the dress. She feels that Kara ran out of fabric. Wow, I didn't notice that when she was moving, but the bottom of that dress is busted. It looks like she got caught in an escalator. Michael doesn't think it's elegant. He asks Kara if she made the dress that she's wearing. That's an affirmative. It's a gray and blue cross between a kimono and a Diane von Furstenberg wrap dress. He says it's a lot more interesting than the dress she just made for the runway challenge. I must say, a friend of mine had a party a few weeks ago and wore a similar Kara design (she didn’t even know that Kara was on television) and EVERYONE complimented her on it. The fit -- awesome. The colors -- freaking electric. They ask Kara why she hasn't shown her talent with prints, like the one she is wearing. She says that she wanted them to see her "blank canvas." Nina wonders what, at this point, would make them not believe that she would create a boring collection for Fashion Week. Kara replies that they should "trust" her. I guess, at this point, that's as good a reply as any.
They move on to Daniel. He says that, with his design, he wanted to show his clean, sophisticated style. Now, listen to Iman. She wanted to see something different. Do you know what she means? Daniel replies that making a beautiful dress is something that he does with great ease. Nina agrees that the dress is beautifully made, but she wonders again if the dress proves that Daniel's show at Fashion Week wouldn't be boring. Daniel says, "Do you consider this boring?" Oh yes, she does. But first, she considers it safe.
Santino says that, for his gown, he thought of a story about a designer who was held hostage and required to make beautiful dresses for an ambitious -- "diva." Are you listening to Iman? She says it's about a diva. Santino agrees. I can see Heather's belly button through that dress. Somebody needs to give the hostage a good flogging. Nina says that the dress is the most "editorial" of the bunch. She adds, though, that at a certain point creativity becomes a "joke." Iman adds -- are you listening? -- that a dress has to be elegant to be wearable. Michael Kors then says that he gets the whole "bad boy" thing that Santino is working, but he thinks that Santino is like, "I'm smarter than all of you. I know you're going to say that there's too much shit all over this dress, but I'm gonna do it anyway to prove my point." I really liked Michael Kors just then. Not for being nasty or anything, but for kind of hitting the nail on the head. Santino works too much in opposition to everyone. What's he going to do when he's designing in a room, alone, without anyone for whom he can show off?
Chloe says that the 1940s were her inspiration. Michael points out the sewing errors in Chloe's design. He doesn't see what Chloe's point of view is. All of you, listen to Iman. She says that a "definitive point of view helps." And Michael is, sadly, "underwhelmed." That's never fun.
Now, Heidi pulls a really mean trick and makes Chloe name the person she thinks should be eliminated. She says that, though he is a "genius," Santino isn't technically gifted and should be eliminated. Santino says that Daniel and Kara are both very creative people and that he’s not "wowed" by people with pattern-making skills who aren't necessarily good designers; he says he would "take" Daniel and Kara, so that must mean Chloe, even though the question was who you'd eliminate and he doesn't exactly answer that question. Daniel chooses (surprisingly, to me) Chloe, because she already has a successful business and doesn't need this opportunity as much as the others. Kara chooses Chloe as well, for not the clearest of reasons. Heidi asks Chloe what she thinks about being chosen by two of them. She says that if she didn't want this badly, she wouldn't be there.
The designers leave the runway. Chloe interviews that she felt "backstabbed" by Kara and Daniel. The judges confer. Michael thinks that all of the dresses (excepting Santino's, I'm sure) were "templates" that would need to be fixed and have things added to them. Heidi did not like the "butt" on Chloe's dress. Iman says that it's a Carolina Herrera rip-off. Damn, she's not playing around!
Michael says that Santino's dress looked like "an explosion in a sequin factory" and "Belly Dancers Gone Wild." He says that Santino has talent that needs to be "corralled but not crushed."
Michael says that Kara always has a lot of explanations, but her garments are never right. Nina says that they are not memorable. She seems stunned that Kara never showed them what she can do with prints.
Iman thinks that Daniel's dress was simple. Michael thinks that his dress didn't tell a lot about Daniel as a designer. Iman -- now, listen -- thinks that Daniel might be afraid to have a point of view.
The designers come back to the stage. Heidi tells Santino that he is going to Fashion Week. He leaves the runway. He goes to the back and collapses in relief. Iman tells Daniel that he is the winner. His silhouette was beautiful, though "borderline boring." She adds, "But I'm not boring." Daniel goes backstage, where Santino greets him with a hug and asks, "Who won the challenge?" Those guys confuse me. Love or hate? What is it?
Heidi tells Kara that she didn't show the judges what she is "about" as a designer. She tells Chloe that they question if she has the passion to be the great American designer. Kara is "out." Chloe is "in." She thanks the judges and says, "I have the passion," before leaving the runway. Kara says, "It's been incredible," as Heidi is giving her auf wiedersehen. Kara thanks them and leaves the runway. We see Daniel greet her backstage. Tim comes in and tells them that they are all winners and gives Kara a big hug. They have a big group hug as Kara interviews that she played it safe for the challenge, which was a mistake. She promises to not play safely anymore. Let's hope a motor vehicle isn't involved in that resolution. She wishes the designers luck as she leaves to clean up her workspace.
In the final part of her interview, she espouses her passion for fashion. And, she's going to keep on pursuing it. She poses and blows a kiss to the camera when she is finished.
, it's five months later and Daniel is fitting Iman. Nina is there too. Daniel's hair has been cut, and I want to vomit he is so cute. He says that he was really excited and that the dress fit perfectly. Then we see Iman on a red carpet. Guess what? I saw her too. That was at the Project Runway premiere party. Tim Gunn told me that one of the challenges was to create a dress for Iman, but she didn't like it very much so the party was the only place where she'd wear it. Ouch.
Sad footnote: I just wanted to wish a peaceful rest to Wendy Wasserstein, for whom I have the greatest respect and by whom I've been greatly moved and entertained. She was indeed an uncommon woman and will be sorely missed.