Previously on Making the Band: the boys audition and then pick Dan, despite the fact that he wears a giant sleeveless sweater. So much for good judgment. Ashley was pudgier. Dan knew he had his work cut out for him.
The credits. Hate them. These poor kids' last names are never announced, and when it lists them in the TV Guide description, I'm always like, "Underwood? Who's that?"
New York City. Ashley says that his life is very exciting right now. The president of J Records stands with the boys, and in a strange editing switch, Erik is announcing the news to Andrew that "Liquid Dreams" is #1 in America and Canada. I must have been in a coma, because I don't ever remember a time when people were listening to that song. Dan cheers. Ashley says that he's going to try to be professional, but he knows that he won't be able to be professional. He then hauls ass across the convention room and finds the lonely Jacob. He picks Jacob up and bounces him up and down. Jacob pretends he's a jet, for some reason. I don't even claim to understand a second of Jacob. Ashley tells us that fans are "finally" listening to them, and that they're gaining popularity.
Jacob's still got a stuffy nose. He says that he'd like to stay right where he is now, with a #1 record and a successful television show.
Dan reminds us here that this doesn't mean that they can now do "mediocre shows." Good to know. He says that he's the kind of person who needs to look into everyone's eyes before a show, and that they have to look back and say, "I'm ready." He says that he doesn't see them saying, "I'm ready." He sees in their eyes, "What time does our flight leave tonight?"
Here's where the show just becomes incredibly anti-Dan. For some reason, Dan has to defend his choice of "working" when he's at rehearsal. The boys tease him constantly and call him names, saying that he works too hard and is no fun. In some green room, Dan tries to get everyone to warm up by singing the note, "Bum!" The other four boys basically goof off around him. Then Jacob tries to get them to "bum!" whereupon Ashley does. Dan looks pissed. He tells everyone, "We've already proven that we do not do good if we are not focused." The others are all very silently saying, "Shut up, Dan." Ashley calls the group to order, and they start wailing, "All For Love." Jacob might be singing another song entirely. It's hard to tell. I think Jacob thinks he's in the Counting Crows.
Another horrible gig. This one is the "Jingle Ball Style Jam." Heh. The boys sing while young girls scream. I'm starting to understand that these shirts they wear all the time are their costumes. Jacob's mud flap lady t-shirt, Ashley's gray cross shirt, Trevor's black sleeveless hoodie numberthis is how they want to be represented every night on stage. I had to watch five episodes before I figured that out. Obviously the "look" is coming off as "lazy." I'd like to meet the wardrobe crew for these boys. Girls scream.
Backstage, the boys are discussing the show. Apparently it didn't go very well, but I really couldn't tell the difference between "good" and "bad." Someone says that they've never had to do as much "improv" as they did during that show. Apparently Ashley's mic went out during "All For Love." They're playing background music as everyone's talking, so it's still hard to tell what's going on, but it seems that Trevor grabbed a spare mic and danced over to Ashley to hand it to him, but that Ashley didn't take it. Ashley asks, "It affected me and my show how?" Ashley still thinks he's the lead in a band and the other four are just there for backup. I love that. Dan tells us in a voice-over that looking back over the show he can see that it wasn't that bad, but the Dan on the screen is now miming the incident to Ashley over and over again. He tells Ashley that he has to start "concentrating." He punctuates this by jamming his fingers into his temples. Ashley asks to see a tape of the show so that he can see how not having a microphone affected his performance. The argument is going on without anyone's really explaining to us what happened. Other people just start leaving the room, since they can't take Ashley and Dan arguing over something as trivial as O-Town's music. Ashley says that he was concentrating because he knew that "Liquid Dreams" was going to be the song. Since we don't know what happened, this doesn't sound like any sort of point that Ashley's making. Dan says that Ashley sometimes has a problem "drifting off." Dan's not wearing a shirt. I wish that Ashley weren't wearing a shirt. I wonder what I'm going to do for lunch since I have to be somewhere at 3:30. Oh. Sorry. Back to the recap. Ashley says, "But to say that I don't pay attention is a false...false comment. To say that sometimes I've drifted, yes. Have we all sometimes? Yeah. Is it something I need to work on? Yeah." Ashley keeps asking himself questions and then answering them until Dan starts jumping in the air screeching, "You didn't let me finish!" There's a strange cut where Ashley does a take, but I think it's a reaction to a different part of their conversation. Ashley tells us in a voice-over that Dan carries around too much tension. There's some scary Blair Witch music here as Ashley tells us Dan brings that tension upon himself.
Strange edit as someone tells Dan he's got too much "drama" today, and then we're watching Andrew talk to Boston Mike. He's saying that this is a problem with communication.
“ The music sounds like Moby accidentally stepped on a keyboard walking over to his pile of money. ”
Dan tells us that people should be handling their business. I'm not sure what that means either.
Erik decides to "break it down" for us. We watch Dan sleep in an airplane as Erik tells us that Dan doesn't quite fit in with the other guys. He says that Dan will just "go to work and then come home." Erik wonders whether Dan's been like this "his entire life." I find it amusing that the other boys find Dan to be a "freak" because he does his job.
No Name is complaining to Dan about the other bad singers in O-Town. No Name also possesses No Talking Skills. A particular gem: "As an escapist type of move, they just do silly stuff." Dan says that they're trying to lighten the mood. "It's counterproductive," No Name explains, "on the real side of things, you know." Dan says he knows. No Name says that someone should talk to the other boys about this: "It's distracting. It's distracting. So that's not productive. That's why I say it's counterproductive." It's like he's reading lines I gave him so that he'll look stupid. Dan says he knows. No Name says, "I'm gonna tell you a secret. That's the luck of show business. That's the luck of show business." It's like the people on this show don't realize that the people on this show can see this show.
Dan gets into a car, rolls down the window, and pretends he knows how to start one of those things as he tells us in a voice-over that he likes it when his teachers tell him nice things because that lets him know he's doing the right thing. Suck-ass.
Jacob plays Tony Hawk as Erik asks Dan whether he's going out with all of them tonight. Dan says that he wants to "be better for tomorrow." Erik isn't happy with that. Strange edit of Jacob just sort of looking somewhere. I'm sure he's not even really in the room, and they've edited in this game-playing footage to make it look like he was involved with something. Erik wants Dan to come out. Dan explains that he's trying to "take care of [his] job." He says that this is the only job he has. Jacob's still looking to the left. Dan tells Erik to go out and do his thing, but that he'll stay home alone watching television. Suddenly it's Trevor watching television like he's playing Tony Hawk as Dan says he hangs out with the guys all the time. Erik says that Dan doesn't. He says that the four of them go out and hang out all the time and it makes them feel good, but that Dan never goes with them. The dramatic tension Casio keyboard goes into overdrive as Trevor (there's no Jacob there anymore) mumbles into his cup, "It's the biggest part of morale." He's just watching television. There's no Tony Hawk in sight. Why did they edit all of that together? Dan says that he'll be a part of morale when he's healthy tomorrow. Dude, he's sick. Let him rest. Erik prances off. Strangely edited Jacob looks away. Dan looks up where Erik was once standing. It's a very badly edited sequence. The music sounds like Moby accidentally stepped on a keyboard walking over to his pile of money as we go to commercial.
“ Erik then starts shouting, 'Where'd you learn how to cook these? Angela!' Then, because it's so horrible, he has to explain to us that he just did his Tony Danza impersonation. Tony Danza calls and says, 'I'm on the settlement that says that kid can't claim either me or Estrada as family. He's not even allowed to mention my name or my likeness.' ”
Dan's in a rehearsal studio making a cell-phone call. He calls up Cindy, his ex-girlfriend back home. He tells us that they recently broke up. Dan tells Cindy just to keep calling him. She's talking about something (I think maybe prom?) and he's laughing, but it's hard to hear her shrieks through the phone and the closed captioning sums it all up with "Ha Ha Ha." So, there you go.
Dan explains that Indianapolis isn't really his hometown, but it's close to it, so his friends are coming to visit him on this stop of the tour. In a hotel lobby, Erik is raving about some cookies. He then starts shouting, "Where'd you learn how to cook these? Angela!" Then, because it's so horrible, he has to explain to us that he just did his Tony Danza impersonation. Tony Danza calls and says, "I'm on the settlement that says that kid can't claim either me or Estrada as family. He's not even allowed to mention my name or my likeness." I don't understand why we never see these boys smack each other. I would have hit Erik right in the face after that crap-ass impression. Cindy and the others show up at this point. Cindy says, "Awesome." She's also totally retro with her incredible amounts of blue eye shadow, flippy fake blonde hair, and skin-tone lipstick. Jacob offers her a cookie. She turns it down. And if we learned anything from last week's show, she's going to keep turning down everything Dan offers. Cindy immediately turns it on for the camera, whining that she was stuck in traffic, and then moans that she spilled coffee all over her nice new skirt. I'm terrified that this is how I'd come off on camera to a bunch of strangers because I'm all, "Wah! The trip took forever!" whenever I go somewhere, too. ["Please. You're beautiful, baby!" -- Wing Chun]
Dan and Cindy are immediately off to a hotel room as Dan tells us they're currently in the middle of an "awkward stage." He opens the door for her and calls her a lady. She laughs. A makeup-less Cindy tells us this is the first time she and Dan have seen each other since they decided to break up.
Dan is on his face on the bed, right to Cindy's knee. She's leaning back against the headboard. She asks whether he's excited to see her. He says he is. He says he was hoping she wouldn't be scared or "different." She says she was nervous: "I guess. I didn't know how to react. If I should run up and hug you and kiss you...or shake your hand." They laugh. She says she misses him. "I know," he says. He says he sees other people doing "boyfriend and girlfriend things" and he's all, "Man." Cindy starts crying and says she hasn't cried since they last talked. Dan tells her that she can go out and date other people. In a voice-over, Cindy tells us that she's proud of Dan. To Dan, she says that it wouldn't be fair to any other guy because she'd either be thinking of Dan or comparing him to Dan. Cindy tells us that she knows he's lonely, but that he needs to be focused on O-Town right now because he deserves this. Cindy tells Dan that she doesn't understand why they're even trying to have girlfriends right now. Dan punches a pillow and agrees that it's hard. He says it's not the "optimal situation for a relationship." The closed captioning thinks he said, "optil." I like that. "You can say that again," Cindy says. The closed captioning, again, thinks she said, "You know what they say." This is because Cindy and Dan are mumbling through their chewing gum, and I can't even hear what they're saying on the first try. Cindy chews her lip and over-pouts into the commercial break.