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This week, you will no doubt remember, up for the vote are Stephanie, frankie, and Ronnie. In a dramatic moment worthy of a Daytime Emmy Award, Stephanie is ejected from the competition. She is surprised and saddened, but appears to exit gracefully. Back at the house, the boys are thrilled to see their dudes return, but Holly has a moment of real sadness. She had become friends with Stephanie. It's Week 7 of the competition, and it's time for a "touch up" to their makeovers. Ready for a bombshell? They're cutting off frankie's hair. Why, God? WHY? Somehow, his short hair makes him look even more femme-y. Later, the models sit around discussing their worst fears. Holly's include needles, tarantulas, and butt cracks. Casey, on the other hand, fears snakes. Remember that. The morning, at an ungodly hour, they are all picked up and driven to an airfield, where they find a huge tank filled with water. Niki explains that this week is all about the models' being pushed out of their comfort zones. So, their photo assignment will be to tackle an underwater shoot in the middle of winter. Oh, and they'll be working with a snake. A HUGE ONE. IN THE TANK. Casey tries to meditate himself out of his fears. On the boys' side, frankie and Ronnie do exceptionally well, while Ben disappoints. Casey is freaked by the snake, but looks great anyway. Holly is sick, and thus does not do a great job, and Shannon can't seem to stay under the water. On the catwalk, the models must work with huge, dramatic headpieces to complement their looks. Ah, but it won't be that easy. They also must walk with...farm animals. Really, really cute ones. Even Debbie can't help laughing when she tries to coach the models down the runway with their goats, ducks, and sheep. Casey's goat...you know, the goat is pooping all over the runway. This is officially the dumbest assignment of all time. Perry's pig, Elvis, gets stage fright and...poops on Perry. I can't even describe the rest of it, because it's too stupid. When frankie walks out with Nigel the duck, I almost die. Tyson acts like a dick during the weekly Q&A, busting Shannon's ass about having a not-so-good photo shoot. Ronnie is congratulated for finally having a good catwalk (with a sheep), and when they put him on the hot seat and ask who he thinks should be in the bottom three, he says BEN. There are not words to describe the utter shock of Ben's face when he hears his name out of Ronnie's mouth. The judges are tired of complimenting Perry week after week, so this week they suddenly dislike him. Seriously, the panel is vicious this episode, and the regular favorites are shocked to find themselves getting the bum's rush. In the end, Ben, Perry, and Jacki are up for the vote. It's getting tougher. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
So, y'all remember that last week, Stephanie, frankie and Ronnie floundered in various ways during their challenges. The three of them went up for the vote, and now must face the panel to learn their fate.
In their boudoir of love, Ben wakes Ronnie to go before the judges. "I wore this when I won immunity," Ben tells Ronnie, tossing over a necklace with a blue rock on it. Again -- good job, editors, explaining any of that immunity stuff or showing us this alleged necklace-wearing or whole portions of what could be a plot in exchange for the Ben/Ronnie faux-love story and your dumb little games designed to make these fools look like jerks. Wow...I'm mad all of a sudden. Ronnie says that if he goes home today, he's blaming Ben's little pendant. Then, sighing wistfully, he adds a "completely spontaneous" "I love you, Ben." It appears as though this declaration goes unheard, or at least unanswered. "I don't think you're going home," says Ben. He thinks it will, instead, be frankie. Meanwhile, Stephanie tells Holly that she feels pretty good about the day -- she doesn't think she's going home, but she's prepared to go, if she gets the ax. Holly is sad at the thought of this: "I'm gonna have a nervous breakdown."
In his lair, Perry tells Casey that he thinks Stephanie will be going home. "I'd like to see Ronnie get the hell out of here, too," he adds, bluntly. Casey, half-asleep, dreamily says that as long as frankie stays, he doesn't care who goes.
At the catwalk, the panel looks serious. I am really tired of the panel and their collectively pursed lips. America has decided that one of the contestants can't be made into a supermodel, and it's Stephanie. (I cut to the chase there, but trust that it took five minutes for them to announce it.) As close to vomiting as they look to us, imagine how these kids must feel, standing there being filmed. How long does that take, I wonder? Like, how much coverage do they have to shoot to get every bead of sweat and look of anguish? All the stopping and starting and repeating...it must suck so bad. That is why I have to hand it to Stephanie for handling the whole thing like a woman, hugging and kissing Ronnie and frankie goodbye and moving quickly for the exit. She says in a voiceover that she's really surprised and had totally fooled herself. Or, rather, I believe that's what she says, but you know, Stephanie talks really crazy. We see her ride out of New York wearing some bitchin' heart-shaped sunglasses, and it's a shame to see her go. I hope she lets herself eat some food, now, because girl is looking pencil-like.
Back at the house, the remaining models discuss which contestant they'd like to see return. Ben says he hopes that two guys come back, and Perry agrees. Really, why would they even want that? Because they're intimidated by the girls, or because they're trying to intimidate the girls, or both? Holly says that she wants Stephanie to come back, and can barely get the words out before Jacki aggressively jumps in to provide her two cents. It's not about what they want, she says, and while Holly could simply answer with a "yeah, thanks," she really should have asked Jacki what her hair is about right now. Because, y'all, Jacki's weave done got snagged in a helicopter blade. It looks twice as long as it did before and has what I presume are supposed to be curly pieces in it and just looks insane in every membrane. "Well, this is who I want," Holly snips, and tries to continue to talk, but Jacki is not finished spouting off. "Buddies are gonna go," she says. "That's part of the competition." Finally, Holly has to lay the smack down -- well, as much as she can, being a pixie from Fairy Land. She says she thinks it's okay to say that she's become friends with someone, and that she will miss them. Jacki realizes that she's gone too far, probably, and cringes at herself. "No need to start getting mad at me," she says, when she should have just apologized, or said that Holly was right. Holly's put off by it, and voiceovers, "Jacki is just not human sometimes."
All this pseudo-drama is interrupted with the arrival of Ronnie. "The amulet worked," he tells Ben, and receives much fist-bumping and back-slapping. Perry hugs him and says it's good to see him which, as we know, is a complete lie. Bounding in seconds later is frankie. The ladies are shocked. "America loves us," says frankie, as all the boys celebrate. "And I love America." I'm sure the several dozen middle-aged women vying to make you their Hamptons pool boy will appreciate that, frankie.
While Jacki and Shannon don't appear to be exactly thrilled, they are not quite as sad as Holly. She leaves the room and cries, missing her friend. She knew that Stephanie was her competition, she says, but she will miss her a lot. Most likely, she's also sad about having to be in the house with all these ridiculous men, as well. Honestly, I loathe all the guys except Ronnie. Even Casey -- who I think is precious and would probably be so sweet if he wasn't being puppet-mastered by Perry -- is on my last nerve with this bros vs. hos thing.
Later that day, Cory arrives with the hair guy from Cutler. Shannon says that they were all glad to find out they were getting touch-ups to their makeovers. "But then," she adds, "they dropped the bombshell." My people...they are cutting frankie's hair. He's an ass, but it still saddens me greatly. Cory asks how many times frankie's heard the Fabio comparison during the contest. He says it's time to shake that off, and that the only way is with a haircut. In an interview, frankie says that he was waiting to hear the "just kidding" part, but that it never came. Even the guy from Cutler looks nervous about it, and honestly, it's just wrong. The child's hair is gorgeous. He says he's been growing it out for three years. The other models all stifle giggles as frankie receives this news, and it makes me feel sorry for frankie, causing me momentarily to consider recapitalizing him...but I quickly abandon that idea, though I have to give him props. He says he know he could say no, but that he's "here to win the competition, so, let's do it." Cory smugly says that that was the answer he wanted to hear, and the Cutler crew gets to cuttin'. "The first cut is the deepest," the stylist says, as frankie good-naturedly freaks out. Casey says in an interview that frankie had always let his hair define him, so it's going to be interesting to see what he's like without it. Yeah, it defined him as HOT, which is how he got into this contest in the first place. I really wish they'd cut Casey's hair, too, or at least stop straightening it. Perry, all har har har, says that frankie's girlfriend will probably leave him if his hair gets cut. In the chair, frankie is sad, but keeps a smile glued to his face. He contemplates his shorn locks as they fall into his lap, and sighs, but doesn't seem to complain much.
Afterwards, the rest of the newly-trimmed models wait for the big reveal. Walking into the room to face a mirror for the first time, frankie is stunned at his appearance. "It looks like my haircut," Holly says, and she is right. His new look makes him look even girlier than he already did. "Fabio's what's inside, bro," Casey assures him. "That's what you'll always have." Hee. The main problem, really, is that frankie's hair is super-styled and looks pixie-ish. Later, talking to the group, he's mussed it up a little and it actually looks good. He says that when he first came to the competition, he said that if they asked him to cut his hair, he would refuse. It was a big fear of his, he says: "But now that it's happened, I'm happy with it."
This leads into a discussion of what their worst fears are. Perry's, hilariously, is ghosts. Also, bugs. "I'd say my biggest fear is probably George Bush," says Ronnie. Ben says some crap about how his worst fear used to be blood, but that now that he's been a big, tough jail guard, he's seen a lot of blood. Y'all, I don't buy Ben's shtick for a dime. Early on, he seemed so sweet and innocent, but Katy was right: he's no Southern gentleman. Holly says that she has lots of fears: "Needles, tarantulas, feet, butt cracks." Awesome. I have those last two fears, as well. Man, FEET! What kind of angry God would invent such things? Casey's worst fear, he says, is big snakes. When he was a kid, he says, he was in a lake and, feeling something brush up against him, looked down to see a family of poisonous snakes. Duuuuude. That is terrifying. I am not totally afraid of snakes, but somehow snakes in water seem twice as scary. (Remember that.)
The morning the kids are up and ready by 5 AM. They all find this to be an ungodly hour, and I quite agree. They are told to dress warmly, and are taken to an airfield, where they arrive in front of a huge, black tank filled with water. "We had no clue what to expect," says Ronnie, but...they interview him saying this standing there in front of the tank. So, is he projecting into the future, or what? Sometimes I think this show is edited by people who speak English as like, a third language. I'm just saying, a lot seems to get lost in the translation.
Niki tells the models that this week is all about pushing themselves out of their comfort zones. She says that modeling is not always about wearing pretty dresses and posing in a warm studio. Sometimes, she says, you have to stand by a landfill. What? Who is writing her lines? So, today's photo assignment is called "posing in extreme conditions," and they are, indeed extreme. Not only will the contestants be out in the freezing cold, but they'll have to pose underwater. They'll be shot by Bill Diodato, who tells them that the shoot's concept is based loosely on David Bowie's interplanetary being (which I can only assume is a reference to his Ziggy Stardust character, since David Bowie does not have an album called Interplanetary Being). However, none of this matters, because (a) these people were not even born when David Bowie was Ziggy Stardust, and (b) no further reference is made to Bowie or planets or beings of any kind. Bill tells the models that the challenge will be to move around underwater, creating good shots, all while appearing to live in the tank. And, oh, yeah, they'll each be working with a partner. "I'm gonna go get him," says Niki, and goes off behind the tank. To everyone's extreme horror, she returns draped in six-foot yellow python named Lemon. How cute is that? Lemon! Except, did I mention the snake part? Casey, as expected looks horrified, but even more scared is Perry. He says that he's never touched a snake in his life, and that he's acting all tough, but really he's afraid of the whole thing and will have to tough it out.
Perry's up first and comes charging out of the bus, Mohammed Ali-style, air-punching and asking "Where's the snake at?"
Meanwhile, on a nearby...beach? Where are they? Anyway, Casey has gone to meditate to try to turn the snake, in his mind, from a scary beast into a beautiful creature.
Back at the tank, Bill reminds Perry that the challenge is to appear as though he lives in the tank. The real challenge, however, is the avoidance of hypothermia, because it is crazy cold. Despite his fears, Perry has a good time and appears to have a great shoot. Bill compliments his work, and Perry excitedly tells the other models that it was "the coolest thing [they] will ever do."
Back on the beach, Casey searches for his ancient Chinese secret. GONG, goes the soundtrack, and I guess they cut away before Confucius arrives on the back of a white dragon?
up, Jacki takes on the challenge. Bill tells her that when she gets into the tank, she shouldn't move too much unless she needs to come up for air. Jacki has a hard time staying still. All the girls will have this problem, and I really think it's because of body fat. Women float, even the skinny ones, and the guys have a much easier time sinking and staying underwater.
frankie, especially, does well. His hair is all bobby-pinned and looks kind of terrible, but he and the snake work well together. Probably because they're related. Bill loves him.
Bill does not, however, love Ben. At all. Ben, unlike the rest of the boys, cannot seem to keep his eyes open or stop his face from looking like he's about to drown. Bill rips him sort of mercilessly, and Ben can't get it together. "If you can't get it here," says Bill before the last frames, "I don't know what's going to happen when Niki and Tyson see these shots. No stress." Ha. Ben snarks back that there's lots of stress, because he could end up in the bottom three. Yeah, dude, that's kind of what the photographer -- who hates you -- just said. When Ben's finally out of the tank, Bill adds that Ben just wasn't very focused.
Ronnie's turn comes, and he is quite confident that he'll have an easy time. "I mean," he says, "I was a water-aerobics instructor and a lifeguard for several years." I once attended my grandmother's water aerobics class. The image of Ronnie coaching my daisy-swim-capped Granny across the shallow end will sustain me through my darkest hours. Ronnie says he knows he has to have the best photo out of everyone this week in order to show the panel that he has a good range. The photographer, for one, is thrilled with him. By the third frame, Ronnie's done -- he's that good.
Poor Casey is up to bat, and must face the snake. The snake handler reassures Casey that the snake is just flicking its tongue out to smell him. "Really," Casey tells Lemon. "I don't smell good." Bill gets a little testy with all this prep time, and tells Casey to hurry it up. "I'm just trying to get used to having this giant killing machine in my bath," says Casey, freezing and nervous. For all that, he absolutely nails the shoot. He looks even more beautiful underwater than he does out of it, and he manages to make Lemon look like a very appealing roommate in their tank house.
Up , Holly. She is obviously ill -- it's clear, even under the makeup which was styled to make each of them look dead, really -- but bravely goes into the tank. Some genius decided to style her hair into a kind of faux-hawk/rat-tail/mullet combo, which is immediately ruined upon her entrance into the water -- which is fine, because it looked bad anyway. Valiantly, Holly tries to stay under the water and move slow, as directed, but she has a really hard time. The photographer is a bit of a bitch to her, and she pushes through. He says that her photos were not that great, but the millisecond we see the shot, it looks awesome. He blames Holly's illness for what he says are her mediocre pictures.
It's finally Shannon's turn, and man, she cannot do this at all. I swear it's because she's a girl and is naturally going to rise up to the top because of her body fat/muscle balance. She's not afraid of the snake, and not afraid of the water, but she can't stay IN the water long enough to get a good shot. Bill tells her that he's starting to feel like she can't do it, and she insists that she can. Finally, they get a good shot, but it was a rough time for her.
Back at the house, the models are all sitting around, and frankie says that it was "the most funnest" shoot he's ever done. Really? More funner than the rest, huh? Ben says that it was a good photo shoot that tested them all: "We're all here, because we're all good, and this is where the real competition starts." Ugh. I am tired of Ben, like, breaking it down for the rest of us. Plus, he's still got the death makeup on and looks like Gollum. Plus, his photo shoot wasn't good! PLUS, SHUT UP. frankie is obsessed with the idea of winning $100,000. I mean, that's a lot of money if you park cars for a living, I'm sure, and it is also a lot of money if you are, say, ME, but dude, the point is the contract you're going to win where you will then become a supermodel. Jacki says that the potential GQ spread means more to her than the money: "I don't have a hundred grand now." Ronnie, also, cares less about the money than he does about avoiding the fate of going back home to live with his parents. Perry, in his continuing attempt to one-up everyone else, says that he worked two jobs -- one as a dishwasher -- to make it to the competition, and doesn't want to go back to that. He says he's tired of getting no sleep and tired of his mom having to work two jobs. "You shouldn't be forty-two and working two jobs, you know?" he says, and...yeah, you're quite right. Of course, you shouldn't expect an exploitative reality TV contest to be your financial saving grace, either. More delusions are exchanged, and finally Perry whips them all into a dramatic frenzy of self-congratulation as they ponder the amazing reality that they, of all the thousands of people who tried out for this show, are the final eight. One of their lives, he says, will be totally changed. Oh, son. You've never seen that other modeling show, have you? When you're bunking with Verne Troyer on the VH-1 Celebrity Has-Been Never-Was Surreal Fit Flava Tour? Remember that you're getting exactly what you wished for.
Finally, we have reached this week's catwalk contest, where Niki reminds us about overcoming comfort zones. I don't know why they have to recap the show before it's even over. Casey is wearing a shirt that reads, "I was hired for my looks." Buddhists are all about irony. Niki says that they'll be working this week on the runway with giant.... Here, Niki pauses dramatically and reaches into a trunk, causing the models to freak out in fear that she's going to pull out a big spider or something. In fact, Niki stands up to reveal that they'll all be wearing giant headpieces. She gives them a quick lecture about not being overwhelmed by the hat while they all relax with relief.
Backstage, the models each put on their headpieces and act silly. Perry says he just feels it in his bowels that he'll have a great catwalk. (Remember that part about bowels.)
Niki comes back to make sure that everyone feels good about his or her headpiece. Oh, yes, yes, they feel great, they excitedly answer, and Niki lowers the boom on them: "We thought this catwalk assignment might be a little too easy for you. Way too easy. We have another accessory for you to master. Tyson, bring 'em in." Um, y'all, Tyson Beckford, America's first male supermodel, strolls in with a herd of farm animals, on leashes. Chicks and ducks and geese better scurry, man. This is ridiculous. Each model must draw a Polaroid out of the bag containing his or her animal partner. Holly draws the peacock (which is not really a farm animal), and Jacki draws the poodle (which isn't one either). The rest of them get ducks, goats, pigs, and sheep, and all must bond with their animals well enough to lead or carry them down the catwalk. Perry drew the pig, appropriately enough, and the thing is so cute I can't stand it. His name is Elvis, and he wags his tail. Ronnie threatens Sheepy the Sheep with sweaterdom if a good catwalk is not achieved.
The models have a catwalk practice with Debbie, along with their animals. Ben's goat is not feeling this whole experience. She bleats all the way down the catwalk, and though Debbie busts Ben for being scared of the goat, she herself is obviously not comfortable with these animals, either -- especially when Casey's goat later POOPS on the RUNWAY. "Mary," Casey admonishes the poor thing, "come on." Debbie weakly mumbles something about how they all need to handle the challenge like models, as if models routinely endure pooping livestock on the runways of Milan. Now, a high colonic in the backroom of an Thai bathhouse? Maybe. But goats rarely figure in to those scenarios, surely.
Backstage, Perry and Elvis are totally having a blast. However, when they hit the catwalk, things change. Elvis, if you'll excuse me for making the obvious joke, loses his shit. Literally. On Perry's hand. And we see it happen. Elvis is fired and, excuse me again, leaves the building. "Sad day for both of us," Perry tells Elvis before he is escorted out. "I know. Don't cry." Shat or no, the pig is damn cute.
Holly is first out on the catwalk, carrying her peacock and looking fantastic. The bird perfectly matches her headpiece, a huge colorful thing, and she handles the whole ordeal like a pro.
Casey is , with good ol' Mary. She follows him easily, and although he moves very slowly, he appears to maintain his composure and have a good time. Mary's poses leave something to be desired, but it's possible that she's just trying to avoid being seen on camera for fear of being associated with this travesty.
Jacki, with Starla the poodle, bounces down the runway, and then bounces back up with ease.
up, Ben, who is carrying his goat in his arms, and almost cannot keep himself from laughing. Meanwhile, Jessie the goat maintains her aloof professionalism and rocks the tiara she's wearing, hard.
frankie's feathered headpiece complements Nigel the duck quite well. It doesn't hurt that Nigel is wearing a bow tie. Come on -- that's awesome. frankie plays it up by adjusting the duck's tie at the end of the catwalk. Unfortunately, frankie's face is pure anger the whole time, most likely because he knows Nigel is upstaging him. In a voiceover, frankie says he's happy with his walk.
Very unhappy is Perry, who has drawn Casey's goat for a return trip down the runway. The goat -- who so sweetly, if slowly, followed Casey's gentle lead -- is much less willing to walk with Perry. She stands stock-still in the middle of the catwalk while Perry flails around, trying to encourage her to join him. We get many shots of the disappointed judges, and finally Perry just heads back offstage, trying to salvage it at the end with a kiss to Mary's cute face. Please, Perry, that goat has got your number.
Shannon appears , wearing a glorious yellow and black headdress and carrying Lucy, the duck. Lucy gets a little flappy, but Shannon handles it well, and says that it was unpredictable but fun.
Ronnie's out last, accompanied by Sheepy. "Working with Sheepy, it definitely was a challenge," he says. "This was his debut on the catwalk, so he was just as nervous as I was." Aw. My grinch heart just grew three sizes. I love sheep, and now I love Ronnie even more. Like Casey, Ronnie takes it very slow, sweetly leading Sheepy and keeping his cool all the while. It looks a little robotic to me, but Ronnie manages the whole thing well, and looks hot in the headdress.
Blergh. We now come to the loathsome Q&A. Holly says she's, like, never felt, like, this sick before, like, ever. Jennifer asks whether Holly thinks she would have done better in the photo shoot if she hadn't been sick. "I feel like I would have did better," Holly says, causing me to cringe, but again, when we see her photo for a second, it looks pretty awesome, so what's the problem? Niki says that she was nervous for Holly when she drew the peacock. "That peacock was, like, possessed," Holly laughs, and Jennifer says that Holly actually made the peacock look like a great new accessory. Stupid, but true.
Niki says that she loved Jacki's co-star, Starla. Jacki says that she did, as well, and Cory jumps in to remind Jacki that she had the easiest animal to work with. He feels like she could have done better controlling her animal. Huh? How, exactly? Models are supposed to be natural dog trainers? Whatever, dude. This is obviously the anti-Jacki week. They remind her that she had trouble with the photo shoot, and Cory talks to her like she's been a continual disappointment.
Moving on frankie, Niki asks about Nigel: "Was that your idea, to show [off] his bow tie?" No, Niki, it was Nigel's idea. Backstage, the duck was all, "Look here, old chap, when we reach the end of the catwalk, I will quack thrice, thus signaling you to waggle my tie in a most appealing manner." frankie, in response to this dumb question, can only give a dumb answer about how, like, he saw the bowtie, and was like, hey, fix it up. Backstage, you know Nigel covers his face with his wing, and shakes his head, reconsidering that celebrity impersonation gig he got offered. "Aflac." frankie is also congratulated all around for his haircut. Cory wants to sleep with frankie so bad. frankie sincerely appears to like his new haircut: "I felt like, when I had long hair, it made me a model." Best scene of the episode: Jennifer -- with flowing locks so long they practically flow offscreen -- smiles a Botox-defying grin and tells frankie: "Your hair doesn't make you a model." This causes frankie to become even more profound: "Hair doesn't make the model. The model makes the hair." I'm not making any of this up, by the way. The duck, the pig, that quote -- this all happened.
The judges are pleased with Shannon's catwalk with Lucy, but not so much with her photo shoot. She tries to explain how it went, without sounding like she's making excuses, but Tyson smells blood in the water: "If it was up to me, that right there would have landed you in the bottom three." Shannon -- no doubt tired of Tyson's little weekly attempts to test her -- says that, yes, the first half was pretty bad. He needles again: "You gonna go to the first half of a job and just do no good?" When Shannon tries to counter that she isn't, absolutely not, he keeps badgering. I love that Shannon doesn't back down. Shut up, Tyson. I wish Lemon would show up right now and run up Tyson's pants leg. "This is bad for you," he tells Shannon.
This week, everybody loves Ronnie. They love his photo, and Cory is ecstatic -- ridiculously so -- over his catwalk. If they could just explain what made it so good...I mean, he was creeping down there with a sheep, in slow motion. Before they move on, they ask Ronnie who he thinks should be in the bottom three. "Be honest," Tyson tells him, and I nearly pass out when Ronnie names Ben. Well, it appears as though he says Ben, due to the editing, but I tend to accept it as fact, because of Ben's reaction in the cutaway. He does that thing you do when you're really surprised but trying not to show it and your nostrils naturally flare out and your eyebrows shoot up? Ooooh, man, your boyfriend just shanked you. "I never expected to hear that from you," Cory says with undisguised glee, and my suspicion of Cory's motives grows ever larger.
Time now for Perry's comeuppance. Cory brushes off the photographer's compliments for Perry, and says that he believes Perry's photo was one of the weakest. His face does look weird in the picture, but Perry seemed to do very well at the shoot, so what gives? Not that I want to defend Perry, here; he even rolls his eyes at the judges' critiques, so it's hard to feel bad for him. Jennifer says that she was disappointed in the catwalk, noting that Casey had the same goat and was able to handle her. Casey looks guilty to hear his man getting ripped. When Perry tries to retort that he tried to pull and push the goat, Tyson jumps in and busts Perry for his "attitude." His attitude when? What attitude? Cory says that Perry needed a little taste of humble pie. "I've got the whole damn thing, now," Perry assures him. Shut up, Cory. And everybody else. Cory asks Ronnie whether he understands why Cory's saying this stuff to Perry. Ronnie says that, yes, Perry's attitude can be off-putting. During all of this, Perry's rolling his neck around, sighing, and bunching his shoulders like someone is torturing him. Niki throws her hat in the ring, adding a few comments on Perry's walk, which she says has not evolved. Every week, they love the guy, and suddenly he sucks? "Wow," Perry says, "I feel like I'm in a dream right now. I don't know what to say." Tyson tells him not to say anything, and just to make the adjustment.
Ben says he knows he didn't do well in the photo shoot; he says that he was thinking too much. Oh, that was it? Tyson says that things are serious right now: "The slip-up, you're going home." Ben looks terrified.
Casey is lauded by the panel for his great catwalk control: "Your sheep helped you slow down, so there was less focus on the walk." Okay, again, somebody help Niki. Casey walked with a goat, not a sheep. (Please allow me a rare diversion to tell you a story that will make you so happy. Years ago, TWoP's own Pamie was visiting my husband and me for the weekend and we went to see the B-52s. We decided that the only appropriate drink to rock our lobsters with would be some fruity "malternative" drink called "Sublime." Pam and I drank, I don't know, a million of them. Later, back at our place, we were boozily discussing a painting of a sheep on the wall of our living room when she stopped mid-sentence, drunk as a lord, and slurred, "Y'all, what's the difference between a sheep and a lamb?" Instantly sober, I laughed until I slid on the floor. She realized quickly what she had said and stomped into the bathroom yelling, "Shut up, I'm SUBLIME." In a million years, I won't forget it. I miss my friend so much! I wish you'd go buy a book to make her feel sublime right now.) Anyway, everyone loves Casey's catwalk and feels his photo shoot was fantastic. Truly, the pictures of him and Lemon are gorgeous.
When they dismiss the models, the panel runs down everyone's status, totally repeating everything we just heard. I feel like Tyson probably makes a lot of dirty jokes on this show that get edited out -- he tries to sneak one in about how well Ronnie worked with the sheep, but we don't get to hear the punchline, for which we should all be grateful.
Back on the runway, the models look nervous. Even though the panelists have trashed them all in recent weeks, suddenly frankie has evolved and is mature, Casey is brave, and Ronnie is "unstoppable." They are all safe, and Ronnie is named the best of the week. Highway robbery! Casey should have been the winner, I think, but I'm sure he's just glad to be safe. Tyson is so excited to deliver the bad news to the remaining five contestants. "Sweetheart," he tells Holly, causing my hackles to rise, "this is a tough industry." To Shannon: "Your shoot was surprisingly bad. We all here were very disappointed." Man, he's a wicked biatch. Jacki, he adds, is mediocre. Perry has crossed the line between confidence and arrogance. Ben was noticeably uncomfortable in all the assignments. So, on the block go Perry (finally); Ben (the new Katy); and -- to everyone's surprise -- Jacki. "Mediocre" is worse than "surprisingly bad"? Okay. Both Holly and Shannon look ashamed to leave Jacki on the catwalk. Backstage, Ben falls further in my esteem, testily saying that he thinks Holly should have been in the bottom three: "It's a job, you gotta do it, and she didn't do it." Wait -- didn't she do it, though?
Whatever. week, we're down to seven.