Episode Report Card Couch Baron: A- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Mystery Date
By Couch Baron | Season 5 | Episode 4 | Aired on 04.08.2012
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.Don -- who's severely under the weather -- and Megan run into Andrea, a freelance writer from the old firm, and it takes approximately .17 seconds for Megan to ascertain a onetime sexual relationship there. Megan is not happy to be the Diane Chambers to Don's Sam Malone, and tells him so in no uncertain terms. Later, with Don home sick, Andrea turns up at his apartment, and the panic with which he kicks her out shows he either really loves or is really scared of Megan, possibly both. However, when Andrea later sneaks back in and begs Don to have his way with her, he relents. I thought this might be a dream sequence, and when he ends up later strangling her, it becomes clear that it is a fever-induced hallucination, but that doesn't actually make it any less disturbing, especially given that...
...Joyce turns up with crime-scene photos from Chicago's student-nurse sex massacre, and everyone's apparent stomach for them causes "Ginso" to label them "sickos." One non-sicko who's still all over this news story is Sally; Betty and Henry are on the road for his work, so Sally is stuck at home with Pauline. Sally gets into reading about the murders and seems very frightened, although after Pauline I'm surprised she has the capacity to fear anything else. As if to back me up, Pauline ends up telling Sally about the crimes in a chillingly casual way before giving Sally half a sleeping pill so she won't be up all night. Betty, you've met your parenting match.
Greg is coming home, and Gail tries to prepare Joan for the fact that he may be different. When Greg arrives, he's thrilled to meet "his" son, and then Gail keeps considerately clearing out of the house so her daughter can get some, as mothers are wont to do. Any libido Joan may have, however, is killed by Greg's news -- he has to go back in ten days for another year, which was not part of the plan. Joan adapts to the change in plan admirably until she hears from Greg's mother over dinner that Greg actually volunteered to return, and as if that didn't make the dinner painfully uncomfortable enough, the news is followed by a member of the staff playing accordion music, which as we all remember brings back wonderful memories for this couple. In semi-private, Joan lays into Greg, who doesn't want to hear it. Gail, once again, has been through all of this and tries to get Joan to be strong. And she succeeds, but in a better way than she ever intended: Joan tells Greg to return to Vietnam and never come back to her, making it clear that she still remembers the rape in the process. If you wondered whether it was unseemly to cheer the end of this marriage, I can only tell you that you weren't alone.
Hey, guess what? Roger screws up! I know, you're shocked, but he forgets to get Ginso on a campaign for Mohawk to take advantage of some favorable developments with the mechanics' strike, so he does the only thing he knows how to do, which is to apply some cash to the problem. In this case, he pays Peggy to work up a campaign, although she takes his insult offer of ten bucks and ends up gouging him for the four hundred he has in his pocket, which is amazing and may teach him, as I've been suggesting, NOT TO CARRY SO MUCH CASH. Working late, Peggy discovers Dawn still around, and when she learns she's afraid to travel back to Harlem with everyone in such a rioting mood, she insists that Dawn stay over with her. As they bond, Peggy drunkenly confesses that she's not sure she really has what it takes really to succeed as a copywriter. A moment of hesitation in leaving her purse alone with Dawn, however, completely ruins the ebony and ivory-ness of the evening, and in the morning Peggy only finds a nice note instead of a new friend and looks as regretful as she does hung over.
Oh, in the end, Gail and Joan lie on the bed together, Kevin between them. It's not the family Joan imagined, but it's the one that's not leaving.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!…while Don is still trying to tell Megan she’s upset over nothing, and while she’s still not thrilled, she does offer that she’ll get over it…
…and now Peggy has the magnifying eyepiece and is rather-too-gleefully noting that the victims look like rag dolls. Meredith, at least with some horror in her voice, asks if they were raped, and Joyce says she doesn’t know, but does offer, in a storytelling voice, that a couple of them were naked, and the ordeal went on for hours. I suppose this is as good a time as any to discuss what I think is the episode theme; although on the surface, it seems like it’s all about violence toward women, I think the deeper idea is that no matter how well you may know someone, indeed, no matter how well someone may think he knows himself, when pushed hard enough, we’re all capable of going to dark, ugly places, places no one who knows us would think us capable of visiting. It seems obvious, but it’s especially powerful against the backdrop of the sixties, with Vietnam and the riots stirring severe societal discontent. It’s a dark twist on the Mystery Date game that will be seen later; girls then may have fantasized about the “right” date showing up at their door, but the worst thing that happened in the game was that the guy was dressed poorly or had a blue-collar job, not that he’d brutally murder you.
Anyway, Megan and Don appear, and since Joyce is the Number One Fan in the Megan Calvet Appreciation Club, she calls Megan over to look at the photos as Don tells her he’ll see her later. Mistaking his farewell as intended for the whole group (or not), Ginzo calls out in his crest-the-ridge voice that he’ll see Don later, and Don’s answering facial expression should be next to the dictionary entry for “Not if I see you first.” As Megan checks them out, Joyce speculates that this story will make the next cover, as they’ve covered the riots already and there have already been five that summer. “I say it’s better than even money Mr. Luce finds a tasteful way to do this.” No one asks how that might be possible, but this is enough to get Ginzo to bark at her to put the photos away, as the way they’re all excited by them is disgusting, but Joyce is unfazed, and says that one girl survived to tell the tale, with Stan adding that she hid under the bed, and Speck (the real-life murderer, not actually mentioned in the episode) lost count. Ginzo gets up and leaves, calling them “sickos” in his Sonny-from-Dog Day Afternoon voice, and when he’s gone, Peggy admits that he’s right. And I agree, but if Ginzo is that offended by inappropriate jokes about tragic crimes, it’s a good thing he lives in the pre-Twitter era.
A shot from inside Joan’s oven shows her kneeling down to retrieve some baked good she’s making, but when she gets it out, she complains to her mother that it’s not even set. Gail replies that she told Joan the gas jets were clogged, and offers to go to the bakery, but Joan also says they need to pick up some Schaefer for Greg, and wonders if they have time. Gail thinks the Number One priority is for her to clear Kevin out by noon so Joan and Greg can, um, run into each other, which he’s going to want to do right away even if he claims he wants to meet his son. Joan complains that Gail is making her very anxious, but Gail, drawing on her experience, tells her it’s okay — things are going to be unfamiliar for them both. “And who knows what he’s seen, who knows what he’s done.” Joan points out that he was a surgeon and wasn’t in combat, as if tending to people with war wounds is a psychological walk in the park, but Gail’s going in another direction, saying that things happen when men are away. And I never thought Greg was the most convincing heterosexual, but again, different path, as Joan opines that Gail can talk about men in general, but she knows this “is all about Daddy.” Gail won’t be deterred from imparting her wisdom, though, as she urgently tells Joan that even if he hasn’t been with other women, he won’t be used to listening to a woman, and while I don’t think that was ever his forte, given events to come it’s hard to think she doesn’t have a point. Joan sighs and says she knows it’s going to be difficult for Greg, which is why she wants to start with him seeing his son, and Gail gets that and agrees to go get the cake. If I can insert my opinion, I think you shouldn’t forget the beer either, Gail.
Don’s lying on his couch trying not to expire when Sally calls for him; he picks up to a flurry of complaints about how she hates Pauline, and someone called on Henry’s phone saying they couldn’t get a flight, so Henry and Betty will be driven back from Buffalo that night, which is weird because Henry is so important, and they never let her know what’s going on but they call Bobby at sleepaway camp all the time. “I guess if I was peeing in my pants they might want to say hi?” I think it’s more likely they just don’t want to have to find a fifth Bobby, so they’re keeping him happy.