Episode Report Card Couch Baron: A- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Mystery Date
By Couch Baron | Season 5 | Episode 4 | Aired on 04.08.2012
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.Don -- who's severely under the weather -- and Megan run into Andrea, a freelance writer from the old firm, and it takes approximately .17 seconds for Megan to ascertain a onetime sexual relationship there. Megan is not happy to be the Diane Chambers to Don's Sam Malone, and tells him so in no uncertain terms. Later, with Don home sick, Andrea turns up at his apartment, and the panic with which he kicks her out shows he either really loves or is really scared of Megan, possibly both. However, when Andrea later sneaks back in and begs Don to have his way with her, he relents. I thought this might be a dream sequence, and when he ends up later strangling her, it becomes clear that it is a fever-induced hallucination, but that doesn't actually make it any less disturbing, especially given that...
...Joyce turns up with crime-scene photos from Chicago's student-nurse sex massacre, and everyone's apparent stomach for them causes "Ginso" to label them "sickos." One non-sicko who's still all over this news story is Sally; Betty and Henry are on the road for his work, so Sally is stuck at home with Pauline. Sally gets into reading about the murders and seems very frightened, although after Pauline I'm surprised she has the capacity to fear anything else. As if to back me up, Pauline ends up telling Sally about the crimes in a chillingly casual way before giving Sally half a sleeping pill so she won't be up all night. Betty, you've met your parenting match.
Greg is coming home, and Gail tries to prepare Joan for the fact that he may be different. When Greg arrives, he's thrilled to meet "his" son, and then Gail keeps considerately clearing out of the house so her daughter can get some, as mothers are wont to do. Any libido Joan may have, however, is killed by Greg's news -- he has to go back in ten days for another year, which was not part of the plan. Joan adapts to the change in plan admirably until she hears from Greg's mother over dinner that Greg actually volunteered to return, and as if that didn't make the dinner painfully uncomfortable enough, the news is followed by a member of the staff playing accordion music, which as we all remember brings back wonderful memories for this couple. In semi-private, Joan lays into Greg, who doesn't want to hear it. Gail, once again, has been through all of this and tries to get Joan to be strong. And she succeeds, but in a better way than she ever intended: Joan tells Greg to return to Vietnam and never come back to her, making it clear that she still remembers the rape in the process. If you wondered whether it was unseemly to cheer the end of this marriage, I can only tell you that you weren't alone.
Hey, guess what? Roger screws up! I know, you're shocked, but he forgets to get Ginso on a campaign for Mohawk to take advantage of some favorable developments with the mechanics' strike, so he does the only thing he knows how to do, which is to apply some cash to the problem. In this case, he pays Peggy to work up a campaign, although she takes his insult offer of ten bucks and ends up gouging him for the four hundred he has in his pocket, which is amazing and may teach him, as I've been suggesting, NOT TO CARRY SO MUCH CASH. Working late, Peggy discovers Dawn still around, and when she learns she's afraid to travel back to Harlem with everyone in such a rioting mood, she insists that Dawn stay over with her. As they bond, Peggy drunkenly confesses that she's not sure she really has what it takes really to succeed as a copywriter. A moment of hesitation in leaving her purse alone with Dawn, however, completely ruins the ebony and ivory-ness of the evening, and in the morning Peggy only finds a nice note instead of a new friend and looks as regretful as she does hung over.
Oh, in the end, Gail and Joan lie on the bed together, Kevin between them. It's not the family Joan imagined, but it's the one that's not leaving.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Joan emerges from the bedroom trailing afterglow everywhere, and in response to Greg’s inquiry, announces that she slept “very well.” Gail is there too, apparently having judged it safe to return sometime in the middle of the night, and when Joan observes Greg making his lunch, Gail explains that he won’t listen. Joan tries to tell him they have steak and a cake, but Greg, already into a beer, is apparently craving bologna, and I’ll just let that one go entirely. Greg adds that he’ll have veal that night with his parents, and then talk turns to the riots, with Greg asserting that there are “plenty of Negroes in Saigon, and they’re plenty brave.” Joan makes a comment about how Greg looks in uniform, prompting Greg to ask Gail if there’s any way she could pick up more beer, and Gail’s already got Kevin warmed up and ready to go, and is out the door in five seconds flat. I don’t know how comfortable my mother being that attuned to the “it’s time for sex” vibe in the room would make me, but maybe it’s different for girls. It’s also different for Joan, as this time, Greg sits Joan down and says he has something to tell her. Joan, her voice dropping to her business tone, says if something happened over there, he shouldn’t tell her, and I wonder if on some level she’s hoping he did stray so she can call her indiscretion with Roger even, but Greg says it’s not that — he has to go back to Vietnam for another year. Joan is, to be sure, severely displeased, brushing aside Greg’s attempts to mollify her by saying news stories of how horrible it is there are completely untrue, and half-yells that “they’re a bunch of liars!” Greg, however, says that’s not the case and it’s “more complicated” than that, when actually, it’s simpler, just completely different. He says he’s “come to terms” with the fact that war doesn’t stop for their plans, but points out that they have ten days together. “I need to store up as much of you as possible.” Buddy, you don’t know the half of it.
In some gracious wood-paneled room, Ginzo is repeating, word for word, the part of the pitch we saw earlier, and the footwear execs seem to be eating it up. When he’s done, one of the execs tells Ginzo that Ken was right, he’s a genius, prompting a coughing fit from Don that seems juuuuuust a little too convenient. Hee. After some minor discussion, the lead exec tells them, “Sold,” everyone shakes hands, and I know I already made a Contagion joke but shouldn’t Don at least give the guys the option of bumping elbows instead? The exec then tells Ginzo that he really knows women, and Ginzo replies that he’s never been accused of that, but goes on that to be honest, they confuse him, and brings Cinderella up as an example. This sets silent alarm bells off between Don and Stan, but there’s nothing they can do, and Ginzo rather masterfully tells them all about the concept while simultaneously claiming that it’s too dark an idea, and I can see his point, since it’s all about depicting Cinderella as wounded prey that wants to be caught by a pursuing assailant, and seriously, I think the actual on-screen strangulation we eventually see might be more comfortable than all the allusions we’re getting here. Who’s the sicko now, Ginzo? Seriously, this is an example of what I was talking about; given how disgusted he was by people staring at the photos, would he really have thought he’d be capable of using a fictional parallel with extremely similar themes to sell a pitch? Anyway, the ad exec is like, I know I said sold but now I am sold-er…
…and before you know it, we’re in a bar, in which Don is chewing Ginzo out for continuing to talk after the client accepted the first idea. Ginzo counters that it’s the idea Don wanted, and even though Don says he opined it was a cliché (which is not true; that was Stan), Ginzo tells him he did think it was good — he was just worried the clients wouldn’t like it. I’m not sure if Don doesn’t realize how Puppet Master-y Ginzo was in getting this concept bought, or if he does realize it and doesn’t like it, or simply doesn’t like Ginzo telling him what he was thinking, but he informs Ginzo in no uncertain terms that he’s lucky not to be fired after his stunt, and any talking out of ideas should happen in front of him. However, when Don goes to make a call, Ginzo proclaims that he’s “such a decent guy,” and when Ken counters that Ginzo almost just got fired, Ginzo demurs: “I don’t think you’re right about that.” And I don’t either…
…especially since when he gets Megan on the phone, he tells her the pitch went well. He then offers to get her in an hour (not exactly rushing to get out of the bar, are we, Don?), but she tells him to bypass the stop and just go home, as she wants to get a couple hours of work done. She adds that he shouldn’t be smoking, so when he disconnects, he puts out his cigarette. I’ll be surprised if that’s his last one of the day, but he did at least pay the idea lip service.
Cut to the Draper boudoir, with its unappetizing, period-perfect combination of yellows and tans — what were people THINKING with those bedspreads — wherein Don staggers into bed. Well, onto it, at least — he barely manages even to get his shoes off before passing out.