Episode Report Card Lady Lola: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Gorilla Warfare
By Lady Lola | Season 1 | Episode 7 | Aired on 03.01.2010
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.Cate's still putting out fires on the home front in regard to her itsy-bitsy, teeny-weenie, snow-white (read: huge, egregious and black-souled) lie that she didn't actually have dirty cheater sex with Baze (twice!). To placate Ryan, she actively pushes Baze out of their lives. This of course riles up Baze, who thinks Ryan is encroaching on his daddy duties. Meanwhile, Cate and Ryan are set to host a competition in which one lucky listener can win a hybrid car by standing with his/her hand on it for the longest period of time. All-star Ryan actually won last year's competition by holding on for 39 staggering hours. Long story short, Cate's attempts to pacify Ryan -- and cover her own ass -- by ignoring Baze's phone calls, forcing him to call the station and secure the last spot in the competition against Ryan (and 19 others, but what do they matter?). Somewhere along the way, TOO convinces Baze that Ryan is a gorilla in his jungle trying to creep up on his banana party (yes, the words "banana party" are used more than once). And so the chest pounding begins!
Meanwhile, despite Lux's fresh hurt from Bug bailing, she begins to realize that she and Cate have settled into a nice groove. Then she learns that a family who lives three hours away wants to swoop in and take Tasha, too. Conveniencidentally, Lux spots Tasha's former-dope-fiend mom out and about with her cozy, Rockwell-esque new family. She thinks that Tasha's mom taking back her spiral-haired hobo of a daughter will solve all their problems. Unsurprisingly, Mommy Highest isn't down with this plan, for fear that being around Tasha might cause her to relapse.
Both of these storylines come to a head about 10.5 hours into the hybrid competition. Just as Lux runs in crying, Ryan and Baze have it out about the supposed "kiss" Baze forced on Cate. Baze shockingly doesn't rat out Cate, though he does slip in an ungentlemanly remark that prompts Ryan to take his hand off of the hybrid for the purpose of clocking Baze real good. He knocks Baze down and both of them out of the competition. Thinking Baze has exposed her, Cate runs after Ryan and ends up outing herself. Ryan furiously tells her the time for listening and understanding is over -- and so are they. Lux picks this moment to invite Cate into her cockamamie scheme to become a foster parent to Tasha. Cate says no, and you can't blame her. But Lux can. She flees to Baze's. He offers to take Tasha in, which is such a ridiculous idea that only Baze would take it on, thus proving that he's not fit for parenthood. Regardless, the scheme doesn't work at all. In the process, though, Lux's social worker sees that his loft is now habitable and grants him joint custody of Lux. Lux shifts allegiances to move in with him. And lonely Cate moves on... to the bottle.
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Want more? The full recap starts right below!Previously: You know the drill, plus Cate is too much of a wimp to tell Ryan about her one-night stand with Baze.
Cate and Ryan vie over the best break-up song on-air, which I think is a bit of clunky foreshadowing for this episode. Meanwhile, Lux lies in bed and forlornly looks in bed at a picture of the long-lost Bug. Ryan and Cate argue what's best about breaking up -- dressing like a slob and eating your weight in ice cream (Cate's entry) or rebound sex (Ryan's) -- and Cate gives a shout-out to an upcoming contest they'll be hosting. After her show, Cate gives Lux the aforementioned weight-in-ice-cream as they talk out her Bug-less existence. The Rocky Road ice cream is a metaphor, you see. Lux feels bad for driving Bug away, but Cate says Bug drove himself away, literally. She insists it's not Lux's fault that Bug didn't treat her well. She says Lux's Five Stages of Grief are completely natural and hands her some money for retail therapy. Lux says some arm warmers might take the sting away. Arm warmers?! Lux, I thought you were better than Hot Topic, girl. You let me down! Lux changes gears and says that, aside from Bug's buggering off, thinks have actually been pretty good lately. Cate tells her she'll be there for whatever Lux needs.
Later that day, Lux has decided to emerge to spend Cate's consolation money, and she's brought Tasha along! Joy! (Sarcasm.) Tasha is as winning and sunny as ever. Home girl is gloomier than the Seattle weather. Lux eyes a "Real Housewife does Biker Bar Hooker" get-up, and she and Tasha agree it'll be perfect to drive away her potential foster family that evening. Lux says it looks expensive, but Tasha knows about this thing called a "five finger discount." Lux looks uncomfortable, despite her sordid, sticky-fingered past, and says she'll wait outside while Tasha snatches the frock. She snarks that someone will need to be her one phone call when she gets arrested -- a situation she knows all too well thanks to her dearly departed, Grand Theft Bug-o. Tasha calls her a wimp and heads inside for a little afternoon larceny.
Across town, Cate and Ryan arrive home to find Baze banging on the door. They try to ignore him, but he can see them through the frosted glass door. Ryan begrudgingly agrees to let Baze in, and Cate tells him not to stir things up by mentioning any of the kissing (read: wet humping) stuff. Baze says he came by to take Lux out for some post-break-up Whack-a-Mole. Because apparently she's a nine-year-old boy. Ryan sharply says he already has plans to take Lux out for a driving lesson that afternoon. Baze gets territorial that Ryan's taking on a fatherly role, and it looks like they're heading into a full-on, chests-out-like-gorillas standoff. Cate steps in to say that Baze can take Lux out tomorrow because right now they're having family time. At which point, Ryan smugly kisses her on the back of the head, all, "What?!" Baze bitters, "Yeah, don't let me intrude on the 'family thing,'" and leaves. Once he's out the door, Ryan sternly says that next time he's going to say something to Baze.