By Joe R
Speak of the socially awkward billionaire, here's Woz now! He's brought over a couple Segways in the trunk of his car, so he and Kathy can Segway around. Now, I'm not as up to date on Segway etiquette as some people, but doesn't it defeat the purpose of the Segway if you have to drive it around in your car? Anyway, Woz gives Kathy Segway driving lessons, which look kind of scary, what with all the leaning backward into nothing. Kathy interviews that it was fun, though she cheated death several times, and now she's ready for a meal.
And since the rule is that the Bob's Big Boy you mention in the beginning of the act has to get eaten by the end of the act, guess where lunch is? While they chow down on enormous-looking burgers, and Woz tells Kathy about the nerdy sport of Segway polo, Kathy interviews that perhaps she was wrong about Bob's Big Boy. Then we see that scene from the season premiere where Woz talks about all the "B"s in "Bob's Big Boy in Burbank," and how "B" is an important letter for math geeks because it's a "2" and thank god for the Woz fan who interrupts this by asking Woz to sign his iPod. What, was this guy just walking around with a felt-tip pen or something? You can't just sign an iPod with a ballpoint, you know. Kathy feigns indignation that this guy didn't recognize her, even though she didn't invent the iPod. "I just make dick jokes." And we thank you for that.
After the break, Kathy says that Woz has invited her to co-chair a charity ball to benefit dogs (called -- sigh -- the Fur Ball ...God help us all). She calls a Team Griffin meeting and says that the day of the... Fur Ball (ack), they're also going to be attending one of Woz's dorky Segway polo matches. Jessica and Tiffany talk about the modifications Woz made to his Segway, including a chip to make it go faster. Kathy interviews that she truly loves Woz's "beautiful mind." Back at the meeting, Kathy mentions that her friend Rachel True was asking about available guys that Woz might know, so Kathy figured she could turn the Segway polo match into a "man-hunt" for Rachel.
Rachel comes over, wearing this macramé top straight out of The Craft, so it's good to know she's kept a consistent aesthetic. Given that she's captioned as "the Bachelorette," we should have some inkling as to what Kathy's got planned for her. Rachel's game and says it'll be a nice change of pace from dating dumbass musicians and actors. Kathy tells her that, with these guys, she's probably going to be the hottest girl they've ever seen, and that rather than her usual gig of being a smart, capable, talented woman, she's going to be seen as a "dumb bimbo sexy bitch." Rachel says that's always been her dream.
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