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Lorelai and Christopher are back in town. Lorelai is desperate to tell Rory about their marriage, and worried about how she will react. Chris, of course, blows this off, because he is clueless about human emotions other than his own. Poor Rory tries to pretend to be excited in front of Christopher, but when she and Lorelai are alone, she gets very upset. Later, they work it all out. All of these changes are hard for Lorelai, too. Logan surprises Rory again by showing up in town out of the blue to plan his new company's launch party. (He has another surprise as well -- he's moving to New York.) He's very sweet to her when she tells him about her parents; unfortunately, he's less sweet when she writes a story about the launch party. It's not exactly flattering, and he accuses her of being judgmental of wealthy people, when she herself is one of them. They have a big argument, but she realizes later that he's right, and they make up. She decides, though, to move out of Logan's apartment so that she can be self-sufficient. Luke is still looking after April and is freaked out about her going to her first boy-girl party. They get in their first fight when he won't let her attend because she is ill with a fever. Luke calls Lorelai for advice about the sick kid, and ends up taking April to the hospital for that perennial TV favorite, appendicitis. When Lorelai meets Luke at the emergency room to support him, he notices her wedding band but says nothing. It's saaaad. But, hark! Is there hope on the horizon? In April's hospital room, he sees the end of The Philadelphia Story and...well, I can't decide what it means, exactly, but I'm hopeful nonetheless. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Lorelai is back from Paris, and her first act on the home turf is to call Rory, begging into Rory's voicemail to get in touch as soon as possible. Yes: when you want to break it to your adult child that you have just married her father, after a quarter century of being jerked around by him like a yo-yo, there is no time like the present. The nervousness in Lorelai's voice is painful and, for the first forty-five minutes of this sort of goofily-named episode, it is like the old Lauren Graham and Lorelai and Rory and Gilmore Girls in general are all back and in fine form. Until...well, we'll get to that. In other news, happy Thanksgiving, American lovers of this program, and many thanks to my Canadian bosses for the holiday amnesty that gave me an extra day to write this recap. One is not at one's prime when full of turkey and JoLowe's cornbread dressing -- truly the finest in the land. If I had written this during my tryptophan haze, it would have been about three paragraphs long and gone something like: "Lorelai calls someone on the phone. Can't see screen...light fading...coconut cake...must zzzzz...Huh? Logan something! Stupid about the appendix. Rory zzzzcute..."
Christopher comes in to stop Lorelai from calling Rory yet again and sits her down on the couch, asking for an open mind. She gives him one. Walking to the corner, he narrates, "I want you to picture, on this wall...a waterfall." Lorelai's mind slams shut. When Christopher keeps going, suggesting a flatscreen TV, a Barcalounger and a Big Mouth Billy Bass to add to the CrapShack décor, Lorelai turns positively green. Finally, she realizes he's kidding. "I'm totally kidding," he admits. "Except about the flatscreen. We need a flatscreen!" Ugh, she says. She'd rather have the singing fish. A flatscreen would be too "Meet-George-Jetson-his-boy-Elroy," she says, wondering immediately if it's not, in fact, Leroy Jetson she's thinking of. Chris assures her it's Elroy, adding that while he's perfectly willing to embrace small-town Stars Hollow living, there are some things he won't be doing: "I'm not going to cobble my own shoes, churn butter, or watch a TV from 1976." Lorelai is offended: "What? This baby has a remote that has nineteen buttons on it!" Christopher asks if the house even has running water, and asks why she won't say yes to a flatscreen when she loves TV so much. ["Seriously. What is she saving the money for -- a really awesome range she'll never ever use?" -- Wing Chun] Just because she loves it, she says, doesn't mean she needs a giant one: "I love grapes, but I'm not going to sit down and eat one humongous gra...no, that would be fun."
Christopher and Lorelai are blessedly interrupted by Rory, who calls to welcome them home. Lorelai says she's been trying to reach her. "I know," Rory says. "Since 5 AM." Lorelai says that's noon Parisian-time. "Well," Rory yawns, "then you should call your Parisian daughter, because your American one was asleep." Cute. Lorelai sort of cringes looking at Christopher, and tells Rory it is imperative that she come home for dinner that night. Rory attempts to beg off, saying she has a study group for a difficult test. Desperately, Lorelai invents a story about them planning a dinner of French snails they brought back from Paris and must cook that night. Ridiculous, for many reasons, not the least of which is that Lorelai, who won't even eat squash soup, would never eat a snail and Rory knows it. I'm sure there are also other reasons, like...I don't know, bringing mollusks through Customs in a post-9/11 world, or something, yada yada, I look forward to your emails, which I can hear you typing now. How dare I suggest that snails are mollusks? Or that they aren't? Or that they won't fly on planes? Snails love planes! I know. I apologize in advance for whatever it is I'm saying.
Lorelai hangs up and puts her head in her hands. "'Snails'?" Chris chuckles. "Well, at least we have a plan now. We'll sit her down in the kitchen, feed her snails, and tell her we got married." Lorelai groans. She had to tell Rory something, she says, and looks worried about breaking this big news at all. Maybe she should talk to Rory by herself, she suggests, but Christopher brushes this off: "We agreed that we'd tell her together. She's gonna be happy. Her parents just got married. It's the dream.'" Wait. Wouldn't the dream be that your parents got married in the first place, before you came along? ["Eh, depends on the parents." -- Wing Chun] And that they stayed married? ["In some people's cases: absolutely not." -- Wing Chun] And that you weren't raised by your mom warring non-stop with your dysfunctional grandparents like a twenty-year-long quirky episode of Dynasty while your absentee daddy rode around on his motorcycle, getting his hair highlighted and ignoring you? ["That, I will give you -- except sometimes ignoring you is preferable to being all up in your grill. Or so I've heard from a friend of mine whose absentee biological father suuucks." -- Wing Chun] "Now we have to get snails," says Lorelai, looking more worried than ever, and she and Chris go off in search of some.
Rory is coming up in her apartment's elevator (talking on what must be a supersonic cell phone that gets reception in elevators), telling Logan all about attending a recent chamber music concert and basketball game. He teases her about being a basketball fan, and before she can make a witty comeback, she unlocks the front door to find him standing there, surprising her again. "What is wrong with you?" she squeals, delighted to see him, and they happily smooch it up. He is happy to report that the space his company wanted for their launch party has suddenly become available due to the unfortunate postponement of a party for Nadine Maybrook and Jamie Erman, who broke up and called off their engagement party that night. "Poor Nadine and Jamie," Rory says. "Hey," Logan jokes, "I invited them! The more the merrier. It's gonna be huge!" She says she will be there as soon as she can get away from this big snail dinner her mom has demanded she attend. Logan says again that it's going to be a big time, due to Bobbie's great planning. Oh, Bobbie. Rory makes the Girlfriend Smirk, which yes, shut up, Rory, but come on, y'all -- you've all made the GS at the mention of a pretty woman's name. You HAVE. Come on. I am practically Chaka Khan, I'm that liberated, but even I have done it and especially did it when I was twenty-two. "No, no," says Rory when Logan notices the GS. "I like Bobbie. I do. I don't like the fact that she's not a big, swarthy dude, but I recognize that my issues with Bobbie have nothing to do with her. She's your colleague. It doesn't matter that her legs come up to my nose." Poor Rory. Logan, for his part, doesn't rub it in, instead asking out of nowhere if Rory wants to come with him the day to look at apartments. She's confused, and then thrilled when she figures out that Logan's moving to Manhattan. "But why do you have to live in Manhattan?" she asks. "Why can't you live here, with me?" Logan says that the drive back and forth would be too much with the extremely long hours he'll be keeping. They have a cute exchange about him needing at least to take some of his things from the apartment -- especially, Rory hints strongly, the full suit of armor standing in the middle of the floor.
Over at Luke's, April is still in residence, hunkered over the table studying hyperphasia. Luke's in full-on Great Dad mode, serving up turkey burgers and gossiping about April's school friends. Awesome. April thanks him for washing her jean skirt, which she wants to wear to a friend's party. She was going to wear the purple one, she says, but the last time she wore it, Adam called her "Purple Nardini" non-stop, and since he's going to be at the party, she doesn't want to hear him saying it all night. Something occurs to Luke: "All night? Why would Adam be at her party?" Luke has to do the math: Adam? At Sabrina's party? He's a boy. She's a girl. This is a boy/girl party? Yep, April says, and it will be her first one ever. Luke wigs a little: "So, uh...is there going to be...at this party?" Now it's April's turn to wig, and she does, way too much. "Ew, DAD," she says, adding on about ten "ew"s when he asks about kissing again. "Okay!" Luke says as she grosses out to the max, and he swears he won't say it again. She picks at her broccoli as we cut away on Luke's shell-shocked face.
Well, the hour has come at Lorelai's. Rory arrives to find Lorelai in...an apron? "What?" Lorelai responds, like it's normal. "I've been cooking snails...dealing with snail spatter." Rory says she thought the whole "cooking snails" thing was just a euphemism. Lorelai: "A euphemism? For what?" Rory: "I don't know. Ordering a pizza?" Exactly. But, no. Now we all know: cooking snails = dropping the news that you married your kid's dad. Rory excitedly asks for details of the Paris excursion, but Lorelai avoids it a little longer, pouring wine and trying to distract Rory with snails. Rory passes, saying that she had a big lunch of bugs and lizards, so she's full. Christopher, sensing Lorelai's impending breakdown, volunteers to try one, reporting that it tastes "like a buttered Gummi Bear." ["I can't disapprove of any vehicle for garlic and butter, people." -- Wing Chun] Rory asks again what Chris and Lorelai got up to in France and finally, Lorelai takes a big breath and lets it out: "Well, here it is: while we were in France, your dad and I, we...got married." Rory is, as would be expected, shocked. Her face goes through several emotions before she can finally force a smile and a "Wow! Hey, that's so great!" Her eyes are so sad as she valiantly tries to ask for details -- thinking they had gone off to Paris with a plan to get married without telling her. Lorelai assures Rory that it was a spontaneous thing, and tries to kind of make excuses for the whole experience, seeing how sad Rory really is. Apparently, the ceremony was in French. "There's only a 90% chance we're actually married," jokes Chris.
Christopher, natch, believes that Rory thinks the news is great, and goes out to the garage to get champagne from the cooler. Of course, Lorelai is no fool when it comes to her daughter's feelings, and once he's gone, she asks Rory, "Well?" Rory admits it: she's mad. "I can't believe that you did this," she says, cutting Lorelai off repeatedly when she tries to explain, saying she can't get into it now since Chris is about to come back in. Now, see, if she felt close to her father at all, wouldn't she have a conversation with them both about it immediately? It breaks my heart a little how Lorelai looks at Rory, knowing she's upset.
Later, at the launch party, Rory spills it all to Logan: "Not only did she make snails, she got married. In France. To my dad." Logan: "Wow." No kidding. He is extremely sweet to Rory, seeing she's disturbed by it all, and tries to take her outside to talk about it. She says that she's okay: she's still processing, and she'll be fine to stay at the party. Why am I finding Logan and Rory so infernally cute? I wanted to stuff him in a Birkin bag last season and bury it in a mountain of hair-gel-eating rats! But now? Totally presh, both of them. Whither the rage? I don't know, people. I'm drunk on cranberry sauce. Oh my God, I just thought of something so gross. Vodka and cranberry sauce SHOOTERS. Am I the first one ever to think of such a delicious monstrosity? A Thanksgiving-themed booze concoction? Please tell me I just invented this and that I will now subsequently become a zillionaire when I introduce it to the world with a chaser of...okay, hold on, I thought of an even better one: The Gravyboat. Recipe: Drop a shot glass full of your grandmother's gravy into a tumbler of Wild Turkey, rim the glass with butter, and slam it! Are you gagging?! I ask you, why don't I have my own show on the Food Network?
What was I just saying? Oh, yeah. Logan leads Rory around the party, pointing out the riff-raff. There's a Rockefeller who doesn't like to talk about being a Rockefeller, but likes you to notice; Logan advises Rory, "So if you talk to him, make sure he knows you know, but don't say you know!" Logan points to another pair: "Behind us, Boykin and his fiancé Celery, and no I'm not kidding, those are their real names." Logan and Rory giggle about these tragedies until Logan's fake-British co-workers arrive to "chat" about how Rory's about to get out of Yale. Bobbie tells her how "cute" her dress is, and Rory forces herself to respond in kind, though obviously offended by the word "cute." Bobbie, of course, is in rare form, moving and shaking all over the party, taking care of business left and right. Rory is slightly out of her element, especially when Bobbie introduces them to a rich creep named Trip who gives Rory the double-cheek kiss, -- which she very awkwardly receives (and this time it isn't even her fault, though Alexis Bledel has historically proven to be a terrible receiver of affectionate greetings) -- and then goes on and on about his new house on Tortola. It is blindingly boring and insufferably snobbish and Rory and Logan are finally saved by Bobbie, who drags the guy away to meet someone else. "Can we please never go to Tortola?" asks Rory. Logan: "I don't even want to meet John Tuturro!" Rory: "Or eat tortellini!" Love it.
Logan then sees someone across the room that Rory will actually enjoy meeting: Hugo Grace, a former New York Times reporter who is now launching an online magazine. Rory is, of course, excited to meet him, and they chat a bit about her tenure at the Yale Daily News. Hugo is also impressed by her, and when Logan is pulled away to intercede in one of his coworker's drunken maneuvers, Hugo and Rory are left alone. He tells her, relieved, that now that he's found someone he can actually talk to at this party, he's going to monopolize her a bit longer. Jokingly, he asks if this party is much different than the ones at Yale. "Eh," she says, "fewer drunken musings on Roland Barthes." She says, however, that on the plus side of this party, she is learning a great deal about the tackiness of the Canary Diamond. Hugo commiserates, a little too righteously, about all these rich people and their snobby rich ways, and they talk journalism. As he is leaving, Hugo suggests that Rory submit something to his new site -- like, for example, a story about this party. When she happily tells Logan about the offer, he encourages her to do it, and before they can discuss it any further, they are accosted by the Tortola guy again.
Back in Stars Hollow, Lorelai is once again leaving Rory messages, this time about how she knows Rory is upset about the marriage: "I know we talked about going slow, and this seems like the opposite of slow. And in some ways it is, and in some ways...it really isn't." Lorelai repeats how much she really wants to talk to Rory about it.
The morning, Logan is in his pajamas reading the article Rory apparently stayed up all night to write for Hugo. She really wants Logan to like it, and is blathering, as he tries to read, about being too excited to sleep and having had too much coffee and yada. I guess she means she stayed up all night drinking coffee to write it, but...didn't her man just fly in from across the world and wouldn't they have, you know...You know? Whatever: the article is written, Logan is reading it, and he ain't happy. Rory checks her voicemail, as Logan frowns over it, and hears the message her mom just left. She quickly deletes it, shaking her head, and returns to Logan to ask what he thinks of the story. He, in a word, flips. Because Rory's little piece, apparently, is all about how the privileged children of the rich flounce around leading worthless lives and going to parties like Logan's. Rory even mentions the poor Tortola guy. When she sees how upset Logan is, she apologizes, but points out that he, too, had made fun of these people. "I was joking with my girlfriend," he says. "I wasn't standing around judging people!" Oh, no, Logan, you're a regular King Solomon with your partiality. May I remind you of your treatment of Marty? And Jess? And, everybody? Whatever: Rory's also in the wrong with her snitty little story, and Logan lays into her for it even as she sincerely apologizes and explains that it was all meant to be funny. The point she was trying to make, she says, is that people use connections to get ahead. "Where do you get off acting all morally superior?" asks Logan. "You clearly think you are? Why? Because you read Ironweed? 'Cause you saw Norma Rae?" Rory hmphs, but Logan keeps on going, telling her she's one of them: "You went to prep school! You go to Yale!" She says that's all different: "It's not like I live off a $5 million trust fund my parents set up for me!" Logan lowers the boom: "Yeah, well, you're not exactly paying rent, either." Whoa. A little much. But, you know, he's not wrong. Rory, however, is shocked. "Screw you, Logan," she says, pissed, and walks out.
Back at Luke's, April is wearing yet another of her seemingly unlimited supply of striped turtleneck sweaters, as she and Luke talk about the upcoming party. She keeps clutching her stomach, and he can tell she feels ill. My husband looks at me with an "oh, no" glance, thinking the hammer of womanhood is about to drop on April, challenging Luke with the ultimate parental test. But, no. She is sick, and even has a fever, and though he is not about to have to scale the highest fatherly mountain -- buying feminine hygiene products for the first time -- he is going to have to do the second hardest thing: say no to his daughter. April, Luke insists, cannot go to the party. Oh, snap. "You're just saying that," she yells, "because you don't want me to go!" He says that's not true -- that of course he trusts her -- but she won't hear it: "You SUCK AS A DAD!" Luke hangs his head, dejected.
Now, if you want to talk about sucking as a dad, let's talk about Christopher. I'm sorry, I don't care how cute you think he is, or how blue his eyes are, or how his last album with the Backstreet Boys was like, so totally bitchin' -- he sucks as a dad. And apparently, according to Lorelai, he also sucks at picking out clothes, as evidenced by the peach shirt she finds in his laundry basket. "Men who buy peach shirts buy [them] because they think they look good in peach," cringes Lorelai, "which means they are obsessed with their looks." Bingo. Hey, she said it, not me. And actually, I don't agree -- I think peach is a fine color for men to wear -- but Christopher probably wears his just to look at himself in the mirror all day. Lorelai's not done rifling through the laundry, where she also finds, much to her rage, her Police Synchronicity shirt that Christopher stole from her twenty years ago, like a dirty, stinking, lying thief, when he swore he didn't have it. Grounds for divorce! Now's your chance, Lorelai! "I lied," shrugs Christopher, and my husband bursts into tears as he remembers his identical t-shirt, lost in a house fire three years ago. "I accused my mother of throwing it out," Lorelai says, "and oh my God, I hated her. OH MY GOD, I could have had the best relationship with my mother if only you hadn't stolen my shirt." Instead of immediately punching him in the nuts and calling an attorney, Lorelai just pulls the shirt on over her sweater, swearing never to be parted from it again.
Still ranting, Lorelai follows Christopher into Rory's bedroom, where he is messing around and moving stuff. "I guess it's Gigi's room now, huh?" he says. "Weird." Lorelai's face goes pale as Christopher chatters on and on about stuff he wants to move to the garage and getting a desk for Gigi, and trundle beds for when Rory is home and they'll have to share. This is all too much for Lorelai, who tells Chris that she doesn't want to change Rory's room around without consulting Rory first, but what she really means is that she doesn't want HIM to change Rory's room without consulting LORELAI first. Which she might mention to him, since you know, they're married and everything, but that would require direct communication, and no one on this show except Christopher is capable of that -- and he's only able to do it because he is clueless about other people's feelings in the first place. Lorelai comes up with all sorts of reasons to leave Rory's room the way it is, and though this is all misplaced, I do feel for her. Chris assures Lorelai that if Rory were to ever need money for a place to live, they could give it to her, and he finally realizes what's up with Lorelai. "I know it's difficult," he tells her, "but things around here are going to change." Lorelai rolls her eyes, protesting too much, and says she knows that, but that she just doesn't want Rory to get more upset about their new circumstances than she already is. Christopher's eyebrows shoot up: this is the first he's heard that Rory's upset, and he is stunned. He gets mad that Lorelai is just now telling him about it. "I'm her father, Lorelai," he says very sternly, "and we're married now." UGH. You were Rory's father BEFORE you got married, dink. But whatever: all this room stuff is mostly about Lorelai anyway, and when she tells Chris that the whole issue is sensitive and that she'll talk to Rory when Rory's ready, he mopes out of the room. Don't make me feel sorry for Christopher, non-Palladinos! Stop it!
In The Fjords' dorm room at Yale, Rory is pacing in front of her friends, in high dudgeon about her fight with Logan: "He's the one who insisted I move in with him -- begged me, practically -- and now, he throws it in my face like I'm some kind of leech!" Olivia and Lucy -- who are far more toned down in this episode than they have been before, and thus completely bearable -- agree that this, coming from Logan, is a low blow. "Ugh, I hate everyone today!" says Rory. Olivia: "Including us?" Rory: "Well, no, not you guys, but don't cross me, sister!" Olivia is reading over the story Rory wrote about Logan's party while Rory says that now she's practically homeless. Lucy suggests that she move in with them. "Is that allowed?" Rory asks. Lucy says that, well, no, it's not, technically. Olivia: "But, we have a hotplate, and we're not allowed to have that, either." Ah. I am glad to see that dorm tradition lives on. My roommate had a hotplate, too, though I was always afraid to use it and it made our room smell like cheese whether it was in use or not. Rory thinks it over, but decides to decline: "You guys are taking enough of a risk with that hotplate. I'll figure something out." Olivia finishes the article and hands it off to Lucy, saying that she really enjoyed it: "It was sharp, and funny, and I could totally see everything and imagine everyone." Rory is grateful: "Thanks. And, it's not mean, right?" Olivia: "No, no, it's mean." Lucy cringes and agrees. "What?!" Rory asks, shocked. "It's mean?" Lucy and Olivia repeat that it is: "It's sort of Lynn Hirschberg meets...I don't know, someone really mean." Rory can't believe it: "No, I'm Fran Lebowitz! It's supposed to be fun! Frothy! Light-hearted satire! I'm...Tama Janowitz!" Olivia breaks it to her: "A mean Tama Janowitz." Aw. The scales fall from Rory's eyes. "God..." she says, in realization. "I'm mean? I'm mean and judgmental. And I didn't mean to be. I was just trying to sell an article." No doubt she smells the lingering trails of Chanel No. 5 as thoughts of Emily Gilmore float around like the ghosts of her future as a mean old woman in impeccable suits. She sees now, she says, why Logan is upset: "I really do hate everyone today. Including myself. Great. The circle's complete."
The circle's just starting over at Luke's. April is miserable, lying in bed, clutching her stomach and running a fever. Desperately, Luke grabs up the phone and calls Lorelai for advice. Well, who else is he going to call, right? Not April's mom, right? Or a doctor. I just mention it because I got all happy when I saw Luke call Lorelai, thinking "Ah! Here it is! They've shown us that Lorelai is uncomfortable with these changes with Chris, and now here's Luke calling and hope is alive!" But then Luke and Lorelai...just talk about April's symptoms; Lorelai diagnoses her over the phone with appendicitis and recommends that Luke take her to the emergency room.
So he does. And...that's all that happens. Luke is in the hospital waiting room, listening to a married couple behind him have a stress-fight about how much time is left on their meter. Oh, wait. Limited time on the meter! Okay, now I see the symbolism: relationships are hard; thanks, college. Luke finally snarks at them that five minutes have passed since they started their inane conversation about the meter, so they might as well go put in another quarter and call it a day, and they hmph out while Lorelai walks in. She's just come to lend some moral support, she says, covering her newly-ringed left hand with her coat as Luke sincerely thanks her for being there. They have slightly awkward chat when the doctor comes out to get Luke and makes it way more awkward, assuming that the two of them are April's parents. "Oh, no," Lorelai says, "I'm not, uh..." and realizes as she points to herself that Luke has seen her wedding band. Oops. He stares at her for a second, confused, and before either of them can really say anything, the doctor leads Luke to April's room and Lorelai walks out, looking uncomfortable.
Logan's on the phone in his apartment talking business when Rory comes in. He immediately hangs up and apologizes to her for their fight: "I was way out of line. You know that I love it that you're here. I was just upset." Rory sighs. She admits that he had every right to be upset: her article was mean and judgmental and did not indicate the way she really feels. "I have total respect for everything you do," she tells him, sincerely. "I'm so proud of you." Logan smiles, and says he knows; the truth is, he wouldn't be so upset if Rory wasn't such a good writer. Why are they so cute?! Damn this show to hell, I don't even know what to feel anymore! Black is white! Up is down! Sigh. Rory and Logan get all smoochy and make with the "I love you"s, but Rory does say that she is going to have to move out of his apartment, anyway; she needs to do it for herself.
There's more kissing, and then Rory and Logan are interrupted by a knock at the door. It's Lorelai, who has come to see Rory. Logan makes himself scarce as Lorelai begins the uncomfortable conversation about the marriage: "In a way, it was impulsive. But it other ways, it's been twenty years in the making." Rory sighs. She's not upset about the fact that Chris and Lorelai are married, she says. In fact, much to Lorelai's surprise, she's glad: "I'm happy for you. It's wonderful." She says that Lorelai and Christopher are great together, and that the whole parents-back-together thing is every kid's dream. ["Mumble for yourself, slouchy." -- Wing Chun] What Rory's sad about is not having been there to see Chris and Lorelai get married. "You weren't there," Lorelai says, sadly. Rory says again that she should have been there; it doesn't seem right that she didn't get to see her mom get married. And she could have been there, she says, if Lorelai had just made one phone call. Lorelai says again that she's sorry: she wanted to call her, but then she thought that if she called Rory, she'd have to explain the whole thing and maybe talk herself out of it. This scene is whipping me around like a yo-yo. When I first watched it, I kept thinking, "Oh, now Rory will admit that she doesn't think Lorelai and Chris should be together." And then she didn't. And then I thought, "Well, now Lorelai will admit that she was afraid she'd talk herself out of it, and that she wishes she HAD talked herself out of it, because it's ultimately not right." But, no, she goes on to say that she's SO sure, and it feels SO right, and that she SO knew, so she just went for it: "I wanted to be married to your dad." Rory says that she wouldn't have tried to talk Lorelai out of it, only maybe she would have suggested that they come back to the U.S. to get married so that they could have important people there. Or maybe, she goes on, she might have suggested that they live together first: "Like, six months, just to try it out, and..." She trails off. "Yeah, I totally would have talked you out of it." Lorelai smiles. She just doesn't want Rory to feel weird about the whole thing. "Your house is still your house," she says, mentioning cringingly that they did discuss putting in a trundle bed for Gigi, obviously expecting a bad reaction from Rory. But, no, that's just fine, too. "I can trundle it up with Gigi," Rory assures Lorelai, happily, and I wonder why, if everything's so great and easy, they don't just end the series right here. I mean, right? Because up is the perfect exit scene. "Hey," Rory asks, "you didn't take Dad's name, did you?" Lorelai shakes her head: "I don't want to be Mrs. Hayden Planetarium for the rest of my life. I'm Lorelai Gilmore, okay? 'Lorelai Gilmore' without the 'Gilmore' is like...Gil, you know...less." AND...credits! No? No. It goes on.
Back at the CrapShack, Christopher walks in on Lorelai in Rory/Gigi's room, rearranging the furniture. He kisses her hello and asks how Luke and April are doing with only the most minor trace of cringe regarding Luke. "It was fine," says Lorelai of seeing her very recent fiancé, and they immediately brush it off as she reports the great news that Rory is happy about their marriage and all these changes. We cut away as they move the furniture together and talk about painting the room pink for Gigi. Yay?
Back at the hospital, Luke, the proud and caring father, sits by April's bed while she sleeps. He flips around the channels on the overhead television and runs across the critical moment of perhaps one of the greatest films ever made, The Philadelphia Story. In the clip, Katharine Hepburn is in a pickle. Her wedding to her stodgy, unfun fiancé has just been called off, moments before the ceremony was to begin. Cary Grant (her sexy, fun, ex-husband), however, is on the scene, having orchestrated various hijinx to bring himself and Hepburn back together in a reunion of soulmates. Luke blanches as he watches Hepburn announce that a wedding will, in fact, take place -- just not the one everyone gathered to see. In fact, she will be having the original wedding she was meant to have, as it was beautifully and originally planned.