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Rory says farewell to her position as the Yale editor, and is very sad and confused about what she's going to do with her adult life. Ahhh, welcome to the rest of your LIFE! Adulthood sucks! Oh, sorry. This leads her to call Lucy and Olivia and invite them to Stars Hollow where they sit around coloring their hair (pink!) and melting down about the future. Arriving back at Yale, Rory meets Lucy's boyfriend who she is surprised to find is her old pal Marty. He pretends that he doesn't know her and hurts her feelings. Hey, what could be worse than Lane having Zach's baby? Having two of them! Lane's having twins, and is finally forced to tell Mrs. Kim that she's pregnant. MamaKim is so happy, she insists they move in with her. They turn her down. Lorelai and Chris fly to Paris where they dump Gigi off with her mom and promptly fall asleep from jet lag. They wake up starving and run around the city trying to find something to eat, and end up doing a lot of remembering about "when [they] were sixteen." They hurry back to the hotel for sweet, sweet lovin'. Sorry, again. Finally, Christopher pulls some strings and takes her to the fanciest restaurant in Paris at 5 in the morning...where they get all I-love-you-kissy-kissy-oooh-la-la. They're so swept up by the sun coming up over the Eiffel Tower that Christopher proposes. Not only does she say yes, but they go ahead and get married. Here comes the ugh. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Lorelai, Christopher, and Gigi are preparing to leave Lorelai's house for the airport. "Okay, sweetie," Lorelai says, leaning down to Gigi's level, "what do we say to Mommy when we see her at the airport?" Gigi responds with an enthusiastic "Bonjour!" Lorelai gilds the lily, suggesting, "'Bonjour, maman! What's the haps?'" This, sadly, will probably have to be scrapped, since Lorelai doesn't know the French for "haps." I was about to make a crack just now about how little the people of France are likely to appreciate Lorelai's non-stop quirkiness, but I then remembered that they have allegedly bestowed demigod status on Jerry Lewis there, and thus will not hesitate to give Lorelai a huge "hello, nurse" and a pie in the face (traditional Parisian greetings for funny Americans who never know when to stop talking). Chris assures Gigi that even after they meet up with Mommy, he and Lorelai will be staying with Gigi all day until she gets settled in. Of course, they'll probably never tell us, but I wonder how it's going to go down for this four-year-old who doesn't remember her mom and will be with her exclusively in a city where people wear nothing but black clothes and children begin smoking at the age of four-and-a-half. Gigi asks if there will be any food on the plane to France. "There will be food," Lorelai says, "but airplane food is one of life's cruel jokes, so just in case, we have snacks out the wazoo."
Christopher comes out of the house hauling luggage, and Lorelai asks whether he's sure the flight leaves at 3:30, because she feels like she remembers it being later. "It's, uh, 3:30-ish," he says, not assuaging her skepticism. "Why do I feel like the departure is 6:15?" she asks, but he puts her off again. After saying au revoir to the house, and agreeing that Gigi is going to have big-time fun spending two months with her mommy, they take off for the airport. Chris mentions that they'll have to stop for gas, but Lorelai wonders, after he has made such a big deal of having to hurry for the airport, how they'll have time. "Because," he says, smiling triumphantly, "our flight's not for three and a half hours!" Ha ha! Fooled you, Lorelai, and fooled me, too, until a reader with more than two ounces of sense alerted me to the very dumb math involved in Chris's alleged charade. What time is it that they're actually leaving? If the flight IS at 6:15 and he was trying to trick her into getting there for a 3:30-ish departure...what time is it, now? 7 AM? Where is the airport? How long does it take to get there? Because three and a half hours prior is not in any way a ridiculous amount to time to leave for an international flight. I realize that these are picky details but...honestly, the joke doesn't work if there's no joke! If he's not fooling her into actually leaving early, what's supposed to be so funny? ["For those of us who have spent five hours at an airport gate because of their dad's compulsive earliness, there really is no joke." -- Wing Chun] Conversely, if two trains leave Chattanooga five hours apart, at what time will the southbound cross the prime meridian? I don't know, either.
At the Yale paper, Rory's tenure as editor of the Daily News has come to an end. Unthinkably, the staff has voted the sweater-vested, Fitzgeraldian Bill to be the editor, and everyone has gathered to toast Rory for her fine work over the past year. As tokens of their esteem, they present her with a lovely framed print of the front page of the last edition of the paper she edited. Very sweet. They also give her a huge novelty pencil, to commemorate the many articles that she so carefully ripped to shreds. "Now I think I have to go out and buy a freakishly large pencil sharpener," Rory jokes. Joanie stands up to announce that although she originally joined the paper staff only to meet cute boys (which must have been a huge disappointment), after watching Rory work as editor, she has been inspired to become a journalist. Rory is touched, but the levity is short-lived when Paris steps up to remind everyone that Rory was the only one among them with the integrity to do what was right during Paris's editorial meltdown. "These are all such great stories," Rory says, as they all cringe, and give her a final farewell toast of champagne. She tells them that she's really enjoyed being editor, but it's clear that she's sad to see her reign end. "Well," Paris says as the rest of the staff goes off to have drinks with Bill, "now we're both ousted leaders. Welcome to Club Nixon." Beautiful.
Not so beautiful? Things back at Lane and Zach's house have gotten...complicated. They're having twins. They stare at the two-baby ultrasound in a panic. "Yeah," Zach says, trying to calm his wife, "it's heavy, but we can handle it." Wow. No you can't. Lane is freaking that there will now be twice as many mouths to feed and twice as many diapers to buy. Zach continues to assure her that they can deal with all the hassles like, for instance, buying specially made clothes until "the surgery." It takes a minute for Lane to figure out what he's talking about -- he thinks they're having conjoined twins. When she explains to him that they're not, he's twice as relieved: "That's like, way easier!" Lane flips: "'Easier'? Than what, Siamese triplets? Yes, Zach, twins is way easier than Siamese triplets." Poor Lane. Zach mentions that now is a good time to tell Mrs. Kim about the pregnancy, since Lane is starting to show. "She is so going to think we had sex before the wedding," Lane says, "and she'll convince me we did. She gets in my head. It's like Korean voodoo!" Zach tries to convince Lane that everything will be okay. "You know what this is?" he asks, looking again at the ultrasound. "Their first album cover. Yeah, it's like a prenatal Nevermind." Aw.
Bonjour, Paris! Lorelai and Chris are in their fancy, fancy hotel room complaining about the rude bellhop and concierge. "I mean," Chris says, "it's not like we're being obnoxious and asking someone to take a picture of us in front of Jim Morrison's grave." Lorelai: "Which, by the way, I promised Rory we would do." Christopher says he hopes Gigi picks up the language and customs but none of the rudeness. Nice. May I suggest you never take Gigi to Friday Night Dinner? It contains more rudeness than all of France, combined. Chris thanks Lorelai, like she's the nanny, for being so great with Gigi on the flight and for being so nice to Sherri. They agree that Sherri has herself together and seems very prepared for Gigi to stay with her. Looking out the window, it hits Lorelai, who grins, "Oh my God, we're in Paris!" Chris: "You were thinking it was Phoenix?" She excitedly says that she really wasn't thinking about anything, being focused on getting Gigi all settled, and that it had slipped her mind that they'd be in the most beautiful city in the world! Chris: "The Phoenix of Europe!" Lorelai throws herself on the bed while Christopher calls the concierge to make a reservation at the most romantic restaurant in Paris, L'Arpege. While he's on the phone, Lorelai snuggles down in the comfortable bed, a victim of the unrelenting jetlag. Chris insists that she get up so that he can show her all around Paris. She asks if the Tour de France is still going on so that maybe they can go throw water on somebody as he rides by. Christopher says that, unfortunately, the Tour is long over, but that after they have their super-romantic meal, she can throw water on him. "Woohoo!" says Lorelai, sleepily, as I gag out loud and my husband grumbles in the corner about stupid Lorelai and stupid Paris and stupid Luke getting the shaft and stupid Christopher and what stupid time is it right now in Paris if their stupid reservation is at 8:30?
Meanwhile, Paris and Rory walk the halls at Yale (actually, I think they walk the same hall twice) talking about what's going to happen after graduation. Rory, it seems, has yet to make any plans. Paris asks what Rory's "taking" now that her editorship has ended. "'Taking'?" Rory asks, and Paris reveals that she's talking about anti-depressants. She tells Rory the difference between the types of drugs, suggesting that Rory may not need the ones that help panic attacks, since it doesn't look like she's yet at that point. Rory says that she has no plans of getting there. "Well, you will," Paris warns. "I know when I was finished as editor, I went into a major tailspin. Couldn't you tell?" Rory: "Well, you masked it so well with your general gloomy disposition." Paris snarkily suggests thar Rory call her "Girls Gone Wild" friends to take her mind off her troubles: "They seem delightful in a get crazy-drunk in Cancun and flash your breasts kind of way." Rory assures Paris that her take on Lucy and Olivia is off-base. I'd have to agree; they do not seem like the Cancun types, but the sort who pretend to be crazy drunk in Soho and slap Lindsay Lohan. Rory and Paris part ways with a final word of advice from Paris about the debilitating sexual side effects of the Lexapro. "Of course," she adds, "with Logan gone, that's moot." Rory: "Always a pleasure, Paris." Yes, it is.
At MamaKim's, Zach and Lane (who looks so so so so cute) tentatively eat some Korean cuisine as they try to work up the nerve to tell Mrs. Kim about the babies. She notices their worried glances and says she's figured out the cause of their avoiding her lately: "You have no new music to show me, and you are ashamed." Zach goes into nervous explanation that in fact, he has been working on some new stuff with an electric mandolin. (I'd make fun of that, but we use one in my band, too.) Finally, Lane can't take it anymore and bursts out with the news: "Mama, I'm pregnant!" Mrs. Kim rises from the table looking stern as Lane fumbles with a doctor's note, screaming that they didn't have sex before the wedding, she swears. "Hit me! Hit me!" Zach yells, as Mrs. Kim comes closer, and you'd think she'd use this opportunity to take Zach up on it, but she doesn't. More's the pity. Instead, MamaKim takes Lane's face in her hands and says to everyone's surprise that a new child is a great blessing. In Korean, she congratulates them both, and Zach happily tells her that she should say it twice, since they're having twins. For a moment, MamaKim looks twice as happy, but she recovers her usual stern demeanor in time to announce that, on Monday, Lane and Zach will move in with her. The room is silent as Lane struggles for the right words to refuse, but before she can say a word, Zach pulls the ultimate husband blunder and simply answers, "Cool." I smack my head so loud it can be heard door -- no truer representation of the perils of marriage has ever been shown! The child-parent-spouse relationship is fraught with such moments. In my house, they usually involve my husband and my mom ganging up on me in a round of "Why Al Doesn't Know Best About Anything," high-fiving each other over my head when I finally give up. "I must go email this good news to our relatives," MamaKim says happily. "They just got WiFi."
A signature sound of Paris nightlife -- an ambulance siren -- wakes Lorelai and Christopher up from a long winter's nap. Oops. The dozed off at 7 and woke up, long after their reservation at L'arpege, at 4 in the morning. They are both famished, but Christopher decides to save the day by ordering room service. "I would like a cheeseburger, with a side of cheeseburger," Lorelai says, evilly. "And see if they can make me a cheeseburger smoothie." Chris: "Well, if they can make goose innards into a tasty spread, I'm sure they can make a cheeseburger smoothie." Thing is, though...you can't get room service at 4 AM. "No room service and no minibar?" Lorelai says, desperately. "And two toilets? Where are their priorities?" Chris tries to calm her down, suggesting that they get a few more hours sleep until breakfast. "Okay..." Lorelai grumbles. "Crummy Europe with their crummy time change. We switched to the metric system; why can't they switch to our time zone?" Climbing back in bed with her, Christopher points out that, um, we didn't actually switch to the metric system. "I know!" she yells; turning off the light, they try to fall back to sleep...
...but moments later, we see that it isn't working. Never have two people been more wide awake. I'm not sure, but it may have something to do with the fact that they are both fully clothed. "I'm so wide awake I could watch the Ken Burns documentary of sod," Lorelai says, "and not drift off." Having counted one hundred and four fleur de lis stenciled on the ceiling, Christopher declares that Paris, the world's greatest city, has surely got one restaurant open, somewhere, with great food and soft lighting, and that they're going to find it. "Besides," he adds, smarming all the way, "just being out in the Paris streets late at night...what could be more romantic?" Lorelai: "Being out in the Paris streets, late at night, eating a big, fat cheeseburger." Yes, yes, it's all very cute, whatever but...again, am I really supposed to feel happy that Lorelai and Christopher are all cutesy wootsy in Paris? Really? Because I don't.
Rory is alone at her apartment and decides to call Lucy and Olivia. "What's Lucy doing?" Rory asks Olivia, who is making an arty mobile for her sister's baby. "Watching Real World Denver," says Olivia, adding that Lucy is eating it up, since "Boyfriend" is out of town and he hates reality TV: "I keep forgetting you still haven't met Boyfriend." Rory says that she's beginning to wonder if, in fact, Boyfriend is really real, or maybe just Lucy's Snuffleupagus. Listen, writers of this show, don't try to make me "aw" out loud over a Snuffleupagus reference. You can't charm me with Sesame Street after all this Christopher stuff! Yada yada, Lucy simpers in, and they all decide they want to get off-campus for the weekend. Rory suggests her house in Stars Hollow, where they can sit on the charmingly creaky porch swing. "When we get there," says Olivia, "I'm definitely mixing up a batch of lemonade and flirting with Slim the hired hand." Rory says that Slim the hired hand is a hottie, but that he's missing a hand: "Ironic, isn't it?" Cute, but what's ironic is how, this season, they've made me like Rory again, while Lorelai is practically unrecognizable.
Speaking of Lorelai, she and Christopher are now running desperately through the streets of Paris, looking for food. They chase after one guy, trying to get a clue as to where he got his sandwich, and instead of just going in the direction whence the guy came, they wander in front of a bakery, where the owner is loading his trucks with fresh loaves for delivery. Mmmmm. Lorelai, in an attempt to communicate, gives him the international symbol for "I am wicked starvin'," including the hungry-tummy rub, complete with sound effects. They guy loves it! "Funny Americaaaans," he says to their great gastronomical disappointment. "Everybodeee Looves Raymond!" Their carb-y hopes dashed, Christopher and Lorelai watch him drive away. Christopher turns back to see Lorelai with actual tears in her starry eyes. She's obviously deluded from hunger, because this whole thing has caused her to fondly remember this one time in tenth grade when she had to make up an exam "for some reason" during lunch, and when she came out of the classroom, Chris had been there with a slice of pepperoni in his pocket. First of all, she no doubt had to make up her test because she had, like, a prenatal scan or something, and secondly, and much more ridiculous: a slice of pizza in his POCKET? Huh? I hate to bust on this scene because, truly, Lauren Graham is downright moving in it, but listen, LG, one slice of twenty-two-year-old lint pizza is not going to change my mind about Christopher, no matter how many tears you cry. "Even then," says Lorelai wistfully, "you were so sweet." Wait a second...even then, when? When he like, never wanted to be in Rory's life for years on end? Chris and Lorelai pause for a few moments staring at each other all romantical. "Head back to the hotel?" suggests Chris, and off they go to get it on.
Zach is waiting on his order at the diner and asks Lane, who is working, whether she's had a chance to check on it. "I asked Luke where it was and Luke said, 'From now on, if Zach wants to eat here, he has to stand on his head in the middle of the diner and eat out of a rusty bucket,'" she snaps. "So I said, 'Cool!'" Heeee. Zach swears that he couldn't help saying what he did to her mom; he was just so happy that she wasn't mad about the pregnancies that "cool" just came out like a happy vocal burp. "time," Lane snits, "cover your mouth! Jeez!" She stomps away, only to be delayed by Kirk, who stops her to feel her stomach for a kick. "You're gonna feel a kick if you don't get your hand off my stomach," she informs him. Obviously not sensing her hormonal rage, Kirk recommends that she give birth in the same hospital in which he was born, which allows newborns to stay with their mothers right after birth for as long as the mother wants: "It explains a lot about the relationship between me and my mother." Lane: "Yyyesss, it does."
Luke walks up, shoos Kirk away, and grabs Lane's orders from her, insisting that she take it easy and not carry heavy stuff. He is very sweet to her, and tells her to call Liz if she has any worries about anything, Liz being a veteran of pregnancy and childbirth. "You two are gonna be great," he says happily, of Lane and Zach. "You'll be great parents." Something occurs to Lane as she carries Zach's food over to him: "Zach, we're gonna be parents." She says that parents don't get told what to do; parents do the telling. "That's right," says Zach, feeling suddenly confident. "Besides, if we say no, what's the worst your mother could do?" Lane's face goes blank, and she rushes away without answering. "S--s--seriously, babe?" Zach calls after her. "What's the worst she could do?" Korean voodoo time!
Ah, the glittering romance of Paris. I'm really sorry for all you Christopher-haters out there that I have to tell you now that not only did he and Lorelai just have the crazy wild sex, and not only are they now nudely relaxing up in their fancy French bed, and not ONLY are they sighing contentedly about it, they go on to like, recap the whole thing and how great it was and how they can barely move or talk or breathe or whatever. "I could just live in this room forever," Chris mumbles, and Lorelai agrees that they should. But of course, they're still hungry. "Look at that view," Lorelai says, seeing Paris through the window. "It's so beautiful, I could eat it." Chris has a brainwave. He tells her he can totally fix their food crisis. "Let's shower!" he says, promising that he will take care of everything. Uh, you're going to take care of it from the shower? And, are you trying to kill me with the joint shower, or what? Is it not enough that they just had the crazy sex? ALSO, correct me if I'm wrong (which is just an expression; don't correct me), but shouldn't it at least be almost 6 in the morning by now? Places will soon be open for breakfast. Even if it's still in the 5 o'clock hour, which would mean that all this bedromping didn't take much time at all, nudge nudge, couldn't these fools take separate showers, get ready, and then, I don't know, watch TV for the ten minutes left before food became available? My suspension of disbelief cannot take these bends in the space-time continuum.
In Stars Hollow, Rory and The Quirks are sitting in the porch swing, hair foils on their heads, looking through Rory's scrapbooks. She shows them a picture of Dean, whom they pronounce cute, and a photo of Rory working on the Chilton paper. Ah, the good ol' days. Let us take a moment to remember them fondly, especially since the few minutes are taken up by Lucy, who goes into what can only be described as a quirkspin, talking about how Boyfriend is going to flip out about her new hair color and how Boyfriend himself has great hair, like one of the Rice Krispies guys. It is so irritating that I want to shave my teeth when they're done. Even Alexis Bledel is visibly pained. They then go inside, where the girls notice Rory's growth chart inside the closet. "Can you believe you were this short in 1991?" Lucy asks pointing to a low mark on the door. Aw, shit. I graduated high school in 1991. OLD. ["Class of '92, right here, and I feel you. Yesterday I had to run out of a Hollister because the music was too loud." -- Wing Chun] "Check it out," Olivia says sweetly. "The year you shot up like weed." Rory laughs: "That's when I finally stopped smoking." Rory is slightly wistful looking at her little timeline, but distracts herself with the prospect of Rice Krispies treats.
Back in Paris, Christopher and Lorelai arrive, all dressed up, at yet another closed restaurant. It's L'arpege. Lorelai points out that if the place was closed in the middle of the night, it's still going to be closed at 5 in the morning, but Chris knocks and, surprise surprise, the door is opened by a dashing maître d', who leads Chris and Lorelai to their table, which is surrounded by a veritable coterie of restaurant staff. "What is this?" Lorelai whispers excitedly, asking how in the world Christopher pulled it off. Lorelai looks so beautiful and the Eiffel Tower is visible through the restaurant window and yes, fine, this is very romantic, sure. Fine. What, is my heart made of stone? For thirty whole seconds, my gargoyle heart softens. Until...Christopher starts talking about how he had been thinking about how their teenaged dreams of going to Paris got derailed -- "I'll say," Lorelai gushes -- and that it's amazing that, after everything they've been through, here they are like no time has passed at all and nothing has changed. Hmm. No time at all, like Rory's whole life? But then, Chris adds, he remembered that the one thing that has changed is that now he's totally loaded. "You totally bribed them to open," Lorelai says, shocked. But...how? Did he call the owner at home somehow or...I know, I know. It shouldn't matter. But it does! It's allegedly 5 AM and they're about to sit down to a full-course French meal? Augh! Whatever: Lorelai is suitably impressed. "Anything for you," says Chris. "Anything." She says that this is all wonderful and that she's happy. As a matter of fact, she would have been happy with a croissant on a park bench, which he reminds her was part of their teenaged Paris dreams. "I'd still sleep on a park bench with you," says Chris intensely. With fresh wet eyes, Lorelai looks back and tells him to name the bench. "I love you," she whispers to him across the table, and I believe her. "I love you, too," he says and after making plans to return to their beautiful hotel bed after their meal, they lean across the table for a romantic kiss in front of the shining Tower.
Lane has come to Mrs. Kim's antique shop to lay down the law. She is meeting with her usual difficulties, of course, as MamaKim talks over her, rushing around the shop, saying that although her room's not ready yet, it will contain two separate beds for Lane and Zach: "Better for Zach to have his own bed. Soon you will be huge. Who wants to sleep with that?" Nice. Lane is trying to get a word in edgewise, and finally Zach jumps in. He says that they appreciate the offer to move in with her, but...no. "We can do this, Mama," Lane says, not really believing it herself. "We're ready." For a moment, it looks like Korean voodoo time, but Mrs. Kim merely nods, saying that she respects their decision. Lane: "Cool."
Over at Rory's, the girls have taken the foils out of their hair and are admiring their streaks. Lucy's are green, Olivia's purple, and Rory's pink. I sort of love Rory's hair, and if I wasn't so flipping elderly, I might do it myself. The other girls quirk away that, now that they have this awesome hair, they'll have to start a girl band. They'll pretend to be a Norwegian girl band called the Forbidden Fjords and purposely lip-synch slightly "off." Cute. Except, wait, Rory's not laughing -- especially when they mention that she can write stories about them for the paper. They finally notice that Rory's crying. "Everything's just ending!" she says. She's done at the paper, soon she'll be done at Yale, and now she feels like she's standing at the edge of a huge, foggy abyss. Poor, poor Rory. I'd tell her to shut up, but I just remember that meltdown too well. As a matter of fact, I'm STILL HAVING IT, eleven years later. Rory says that she hates not knowing what's going to happen with her future and her career and with Logan. Lucy and Olivia sweetly tell her that they understand, and feel the same way. "I'm an art major," Olivia says by way of explanation, making me laugh. Rory wonders if she should be applying to grad school or law school. "Dude," Lucy says, "you don't want to go to law school." Rory: "I SO don't want to go to law school."
The sun is coming up outside the restaurant in Paris, but Lorelai is still moony over Christopher. Good one, Al Lowe. Tearily, Lorelai says that she's just so happy; she never wants any of this Paris stuff to end. "Well, it doesn't have to end," Christopher says. "When we get back to Stars Hollow, we can sleep all day and wander the town in the middle of the night and that stuff we did back at the hotel room? We can definitely do that stuff back in Stars Hollow." Once again, they emotionally declare their love for each other. "Lor," says Christopher, "remember when I told you that I would wait until we were both eighty for you to figure out 'us'?" He says he doesn't want to wait. "Chris..." says Lorelai, understanding what he means, and worrying that it's too soon: "We've only been dating a few months." Chris: "Try twenty-five years." Yes, well, twenty-five years during which you both were engaged and/or married to other people three separate times. But, you know, forget all that. Christopher wants to get married right there in Paris. Right now. "Not here," says Lorelai. Chris: "Why not?" Lorelai: "Well...Rory." Christopher insists that Rory will be thrilled. Lorelai says again that she loves him, but that she thinks they should wait. Christopher doesn't want to. Overwhelmed, Lorelai stares into his eyes as he asks her to marry him.
Zach and Lane come home, arguing about the merits of naming the babies Marco and Polo, to find Mrs. Kim babyproofing their apartment. Zach wonders how she got in. "Who couldn't get it?" MamaKim asks, incredulous. "Hiding a key under the mat is like hosting a burglar's open house!" Along with cleaning up the baby death trap of their apartment, MamaKim has gone grocery shopping and, she says, will cook dinner for them as soon as she "unpacks." They turn, slowly, as if in a horror movie, to see Mrs. Kim's suitcases stacked on Brian's bed. She has decided that they were right, and that they should live and raise their family in their own house: "So, I will move in with you. Cool?" Lane finally overcomes her speechlessness to ask what MamaKim has done with Brian. "Brian," MamaKim says, "is fine." And, indeed, he is, for we cut away to see him with the Korean relatives, happily enjoying a traditional dinner.
Rory and the Fjords are back at Yale, where they run into Boyfriend in Lucy and Olivia's room. Rory, incidentally, is wearing a shirt that makes her look like she's about to do a scene from The Wizard of Oz. Guess what? Boyfriend is Rory's old friend and dumpee, Marty. He pretends not to know her and shakes her hand as if they've just met. When the girls run into their (huge) bedrooms to pull out dresses for their future Fjords concerts, Rory asks Marty why he didn't tell Lucy they're old friends. "Oh," he says, "I just thought it would be weird. What's the difference?" Rory's feelings are obviously hurt; she can't understand why Marty would behave this way. While the girls talk about the cuteness of Stars Hollow, Rory stands there, uncomfortable.
Christopher and Lorelai have arrived back at the Crap Shack, all sad that they're not in Paris anymore. Chris gives her a kiss, saying that he's going to bring in the rest of their stuff. "Welcome home, Mrs. Hayden," he says. So, they're married. Somehow. Even though it's apparently legally impossible for them to have done so, but...details, right? (Hey, maybe that's the twist! A girl can dream.) Lorelai looks at her ring and sighs with happiness, but when Christopher walks away, it's impossible not to notice her mixed emotions.
week? It all hits the fan.