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Lorelai finds Rory in the living room and asks her for some advice. Lorelai has fashioned a veil out of some newspaper and a headband. "Huh," Rory says. "Have you tried the Arts and Leisure section?" Lorelai says that she's trying out veil lengths and needs Rory to be serious. Rory's not sure if she can be serious when Lorelai's wearing the newspaper on her head, but she says she'll give it a try. Lorelai's wearing a shirt that's surprisingly not a part of the ensemble. It's a gray sleeveless t-shirt with fake pearls all around like six necklaces. Lorelai goes on about the different kinds of veils she can wear, and stops herself when she sees that Rory is reading her. Rory grabs the section of newspaper on Lorelai's left shoulder and says, "This Putin arms race thing is getting really crazy." I don't care if there's really an arms race. All I know is I'm very happy that Vladimir Putin has been elected to his position because no matter how grim, horrible, and disastrous the past month has been, there hasn't been a more sure-fire way to get me to giggle than by having George W. Bush say the word "Putin." He says it in that way Texans mean someone is particularly farty, and I love it. "Putin." I'm giggling now. Lorelai asks Rory to help her with the most important fashion decision she'll ever make in her lifetime. Rory suggests that Lorelai go to a wedding design place. Rory asks Lorelai to bend over so she can see the weather. It's not as dirty as it sounds. Lorelai says she already went to Marry Me-Me's, but that place got her depressed. She says if you hadn't picked out your wedding dress back when you were in junior high, it's "off-the-rack for you, Missy." Lorelai says one dress gave her a rash. "And I've got to say, does anyone miss the bustle? Because I sure haven't." Lorelai says she's going to look gross and make children laugh and Max will realize he's made a mistake. Rory says it's time to go dress shopping. Lorelai tries to talk Rory into thinking she's busy, but Rory's not giving up. They leave to go shopping. There's the Gilmore Girls introduction I'm used to. They just don't have the opening credits here.
Hey, Paris. We missed you. The Chilton girls are looking over their summer schedules. Fraulein says she might not go to college. Louisa says that Princess Grace didn't go to college. "Thank you for the history lesson, A.J. Benza," Paris drones. Fraulein tells Paris to take a chill pill. "Marry rich," Paris counters. Rory walks up at this point and Fraulein asks her whether she's taking summer classes. Paris and Louisa share looks. Fraulein asks what the problem is. Rory reminds her that they are all supposed to hate her right now. "Tristan." "P.J. Harvey," they remind her in turn. Rory says she's just going to read the board. Fraulein tells Rory that there's a Rebuilding Together thing going on tomorrow, which is basically Habitat for Humanity. Paris is way unhappy that Fraulein is inviting Rory along on the house-building community-service stuff. It looks good on your transcript, Fraulein informs Rory. Rory says she'll think about it. Paris tells Rory that she won't like it. "Because you'll be there?" Rory asks. "Yes," Paris says. "I'll think about it," Rory repeats, and walks off.
“ I don't know why, but they've got Rory in a big floral dress and cardigan again, making her look like she's pregnant or a crazy girl. ”
Paris follows Rory, saying that Rory will really hate Rebuilding Together, and that it doesn't fit Rory's personality. Rory says that Paris doesn't know anything about her, and that maybe she loves hammering and drilling and dirt. Rory says that she collects dirt, in fact. "You're hilarious," Paris says. "You're pathetic," Rory counters. Nice to see Rory sticking up for herself in front of Paris for a change. Paris walks off, but Rory follows, asking why Paris is spending so much effort to get Rory not to come. Paris says she totally doesn't care. Rory says that Paris can't be mad for the rest of her life that she thought Philllipppe and Rory were going out when they weren't. Paris says that they don't have some kind of "deep Thelma and Louise" thing going. Rory says she's still going to go tomorrow. Paris tells Rory to see if she cares. Rory says she will see. Paris leaves, getting the last word. Louisa and Fraulein follow, but Fraulein gives a final wave to Rory. Henry walks up to Rory at this point and asks about her summer schedule. He tells her that he's taking Trig for the third time this session. She offers to help and he says he might take her up on it. I'm glad they've brought Henry back. He stammers and stares at Rory until she tells him that Lane's okay. Lane. Remember Lane, Rory? Your friend who's getting shipped to Korea in minutes? Henry says that he called Lane, but that he kept getting MamaLane, and that he'd hang up and after the thirteenth time, she threatened to call the FBI and have him put in prison. He says he's pretty sure that the punishment didn't fit the crime, but that MamaLane sounded capable of getting things done. Rory says she'll tell Lane he hasn't forgotten her. Henry gives Rory his phone number to give to Lane. Rory calls him back when she sees he's given her his trig notes. "I think we may have nailed down the problem," she says, as Henry grins.
Speaking of nailing things, Lorelai is teasing Rory about going to build a house the day. Rory doesn't find it so funny. The girls pull up to Emily's house (I guess it's Friday night again) as Lorelai jokes that Rory still has a dead lightbulb in her closet. Rory says that Rebuilding Together is for charity. Lorelai pulls out the old joke that these poor people have it rough already and shouldn't have to suffer Rory's non-existent carpentry skills as well. Rory says she'll just be assisting others who need help and that it'll look good on her transcript and that she doesn't want to talk about it anymore. At the door, Lorelai starts to pull off her engagement ring; Rory asks Lorelai when she plans on telling Emily about the engagement. Lorelai doesn't want to tell her just yet. Rory says that the wedding is in three months, and that Lorelai should tell her now. She says she can tell them before dinner. Lorelai says she'll tell them when she's ready, and that since she's the mother and Rory's the daughter, Rory should probably listen to her, since that's the cultural norm. Rory threatens to tell Emily in two weeks if Lorelai doesn't. Lorelai comments that this must not be one of those cultures where daughters have to listen as Rory rings the doorbell. Emily answers the door and says they'll have to eat quickly since Richard has an early flight the day. Emily leaves them at the door and walks to the dining room, as Lorelai makes small talk with herself at the entrance. I don't know why, but they've got Rory in a big floral dress and cardigan again, making her look like she's pregnant or a crazy girl.
“ I've never had a grandfather, so I don't really have a story to share here to get all wistful, but I sure wish I knew what it was like to have a Grampa hug me and apologize for being a grumpy old coot. I'm getting downhome-y with my recap jargon, aren't I? Must be the townies. ”
In the dining room, Emily is barking orders to the maid to hurry things up, and calls for Richard to come to the table. Rory and Lorelai sit down to eat their salads. Emily tells them to eat. Lorelai jokes that only Richard is in a hurry, and that she and Rory can stay all night, playing games, doing Jell-O shots, playing Light As a Feather; Stiff As a Board. Emily eats without looking up from her plate. Lorelai gives up. Richard walks in and asks why they started eating without him. Emily tells him he has a 6 AM flight tomorrow. Richard asks whether she's sure. Emily goes on insisting that she's completely sure because she checked it with his secretary three times and left a note for him on the table. She realizes that Richard is teasing her. "Very possible," he says. Emily says she doesn't find it amusing, and Richard says that's why it's called teasing. Richard says hello to Lorelai and asks Rory if he may speak to her outside. Rory leaves the table and follows. Lorelai tries to engage Emily in a conversation, but Emily's pointedly not talking to her.
Outside, Richard wants to make sure everything is okay after last week. Rory says that he already called about this last week, that she knows he's sorry, and that she's forgiven him for everything. Richard says that they've never fought before, and that he didn't like it. They hug and everything is better. I've never had a grandfather, so I don't really have a story to share here to get all wistful, but I sure wish I knew what it was like to have a Grampa hug me and apologize for being a grumpy old coot. I'm getting downhome-y with my recap jargon, aren't I? Must be the townies.
As they walk in, Richard asks Rory to follow him so that he can give her his present. Lorelai asks where they're going. Richard says they'll just be a moment. Lorelai tells them to hurry up because they're missing a hell of a conversation. Richard and Rory walk off. Lorelai tries to small talk about the salad dressing. It's lemony. "Nothing like a nice salad of lemony goodness," Lorelai says. Lorelai puts down her fork and says she needs to tell Emily something. She asks Emily to stop eating for a second so she can tell her. Emily puts down her fork and listens. "Okay, um. You know Max," Lorelai begins. "No, I don't," Emily interrupts. Lorelai: "Well, I know you don't know him, but you know of him, right?" Emily: "I've heard rumblings." Lorelai: "Right. Well, um, the...Max and I have been serious for quite a while now and he asked me to marry him and I said yes. I'm getting married." Lorelai holds up her hand to show off the engagement ring. Emily doesn't even move to say, "Well, I think that's very nice. I certainly hope we'll be in town for it, but if not we'll send a nice gift. Now, excuse me, I'm going to check on the roast." Emily gets up and walks out of the dining room. Lorelai nods and stares at the table as we go to commercial. See? This is the Gilmore Girls I'm used to. Things are back to normal after that silly last episode. No CuteDean talking, no overuse of Townie humor. Wait? Lane is still getting shipped to Korea? Doesn't anybody care? Korea! Forever!
Lorelai and Rory walk through Stars Hollow to Luke's. Lorelai insists that she's okay as Rory apologizes. She says it was inevitable: she shouldn't have told Emily. Rory says that Lorelai was trying to be nice. She says maybe Emily will call and apologize. Lorelai tells Rory that when she was opening her mouth to tell Emily she was getting married, her mind was telling her to stop talking. Her mouth didn't listen and it opened and the words came out and her mouth was stunned. Her mind said "I told you so," and her mouth got mad because no mouth likes to have its nose rubbed in it and now her mind and her mouth are mad at each other and won't be talking for weeks. As they walk into Luke's diner, Rory asks, "Your mouth has a nose?"
Lorelai says she's crabby. Rory says she's just hungry because she didn't eat any dinner. Lorelai says that the second she got her jaw off the ground, Emily had taken her plate. Rory says that Luke will cheer her up. Luke moans that he's great at spreading joy. Lorelai and Rory joke over whether Lorelai needs to eat a "Rant" meal or an "Acceptance" meal. Luke says that today must have been a good Oprah. Lorelai briefs Luke on what happened at Emily's house, prompting Luke to share the wisdom, "There's nothing like a wedding to screw up a family." Lorelai says that, in her case, there's nothing like a family to screw up a family. Luke says that this is supposed to be a good time, a happy time, a "I want to die when you die" time, and a "My life meant nothing until you used my toothbrush" time. But once you start planning the wedding, everyone's got a problem or an issue and you're so concerned about making everyone else in your life happy, you lose all the joy of your special day. Luke says it'll still be a disaster because someone's always getting drunk, cheating on someone, or starting a food fight. Lorelai says that the Gettysburg Address was only one page long, and that was about a war. Luke says that he just calls them as he sees them. Lorelai orders the "Luke's Giving Lorelai a Migraine" meal. With both ranch and bleu cheese. Luke leaves to get the food. I would think that Lorelai would love to drone to Luke about how shitty weddings are. I'm surprised she's actually upbeat about the ceremony at this early stage in the game.
Rory's got her overalls on, and she's worried about the time. She's all ready to go build some houses. Lorelai is pouring coffee into a Thermos for Rory. She says she made Rory something really cool that she has to give her right now. It's a hammer covered in pink feathers, rhinestones, and bells. Lorelai tells Rory to build a really pretty house with it. "How long's it going to take to talk you out of giving that to me?" Rory asks. Lorelai says it'll take at least an hour or two, so Rory takes the frilly hammer. Lorelai tells Rory to be careful and not to fall down any wells.
The little brides are all dancing on the gazebo. Max and Lorelai hold hands at their thrones, but Lorelai is now staring at Luke's. It's had a makeover since two episodes ago; now it has a fancy sign and doesn't say "hardware" anywhere. Max asks Lorelai whether she's okay. Lorelai says she is, but she keeps staring at Luke's. She excuses herself for a second.
Kirk is yelling on the megaphone that nobody can have more than three treats, and that if anyone is caught with more than three treats, that person could be ejected from the party. Lorelai walks up and asks to borrow the megaphone for a second. Kirk hands it to her. Lorelai walks away. Kirk stands and pouts, realizing he just got his toy taken away.
Lorelai finds Luke filling his ketchup bottles. He asks what she's doing there, and she says she's asking him the same question. Luke says he's busy. Lorelai comments that they keep making that ketchup slower and slower. She says it's pretty crazy at the party. Lots of people having fun. She says he'd be miserable, but she'd really like him to join her, and suggests that he finish the ketchup but leave the Worcestershire sauce for tomorrow. Luke says he'll see what he can do. Lorelai says it's a big day for her and it feels like he should be there. She awkwardly excuses herself back to the party. Luke stares at his ketchup.
Sookie's very pleased with the success of the party. She's cooing to Jackson that the whole thing is so romantic and is making her all giddy. She says that Lorelai and Max are in love and everything is perfect. Jackson screams that he gets it and doesn't need a piano to fall on his head. Sookie says nobody wants a piano to fall on his or her head. Jackson says he understands: "I'm hip, okay?" He says he knows he and Sookie are in that part of the relationship where they have to discuss everything, so he wants to tell her he's not ready for marriage. Sookie says that's okay. Jackson says he'd be willing to move in with her. Sookie starts giggling, saying he's hilarious. "I'll move in with you," she says in a deep voice. She keeps calling him a riot, laughing hysterically as Jackson says he wasn't kidding and it's not a joke. Sookie never stops laughing as she leaves. She says she's getting a cramp from all the laughing as Jackson shouts that he's going to move in.
Miss Patty and Kirk slow dance. Kirk holds a napkin between them.