Well, someone heard my birthday pleas. It seems that the final two episodes of Get Real may not be aired and will instead be replaced by the final episodes of Party of Five. This means we may be witnessing the last of this show. Enjoy it while it lasts.
To celebrate, and in honor of this show continuing much longer than it was ever supposed to, I'm combining this recap with a drinking game. By all means, feel free to join in with your beverage of choice. Here are the rules:
- Every time Meghan flips or tucks her hair: One drink.
- Every time Kenny stammers: One drink.
- Every time Mitch gets a distant look on his face: One drink.
- Every time Cameron looks away with his mouth open: One drink.
- Every time Elizabeth speaks: Two drinks.
- Every time Mary's neck cords appear for their close-up: One drink.
- Every time we hear the five-note Get Real jingle: One drink.
You ready? Let's kick it. Mad props to Heathen, Omar, stee and All-Purpose Cultural Cat Girl Nuku Nuku.
Previously on Get Real: They let Cam back in school because he was stupid and wet. He looked up into the rain with his mouth open (1 drink). Slutgirl was interested in Cam. Someone went way back in the archives to pull up the scene where Mitch decided to quit his job and start the Restoration of Sin, now renamed the Frisky Father's Firehouse. There was a shot of Meghan hugging Clay as she told Slutgirl how lucky she was to have him in her life. Kenny told Rebecca that he's dating Kimberly. He then went to Kim's house in the rain to tell her that he chose her.
Fade up on Cameron sliding down the Frisky Father's Firehouse pole. He tells Kenny to give it a try. Kenny is hesitant: "It's not the speed I'm worried about, it's the friction." Tell me about it, baby. Some guy tells Kenny to do it for "Uncle George." Kenny reminds him that technically George isn't his uncle, but his neighbor. As everyone is at the "work table" eating chicken, Mitch is showing George around the place. He's planning on buying it and turning it into a restaurant. Oh, and somehow during the last week they completely renovated the building. It's all painted and finished. I suppose all of that sexual aggression Mitch was feeling was put to good use. Cameron sticks an entire chicken breast into his mouth and walks off. Mitch looks around his building and asks George to take good care of it (one drink). George says he doesn't own it yet, and then leans towards Cam to say, "Hey, Cameron. FYI: I don't know the Heimlich." "I'm hungry," Cam says around his food. "It's a constant state with him," we hear too-loudly from Mary, but we don't see her. Mary asks Aunt George about her son Dustin as Mitch asks Uncle George how Andrew's "Internet Company" is doing. George tells him that Andrew's company "goes public" month. Aunt George asks Mary where Meghan has decided to go to college. Mary goes on and on about how Andrew was always at their door selling something when he was a kid. Who are these people? Another set of new best friends? What the hell? Aunt George bounces back that Meghan was always "peddling" Girl Scout cookies at their place. Yeah, Meghan's a regular Girl Scout, all right. Aunt George asks what college Meghan finally settled on. (Mary's neck cords: One drink.) Mary says that Meghan's decided not to go to college. Mitch stammers about how Meghan is "content" to follow "several different directions." It sounds like Meghan can't go to college because of a smack habit or something. The two Georges look like they are totally embarrassed for the Green family's idiotic, slacker kids. Aunt George asks Mary if she's okay with this. Uncle George is sitting with Mitch on some stairs and reminds him that Andrew dropped out of college, but now it's a whole new world out there.
As Mitch voices-over that he thinks Meghan is still "floundering," we see Meghan enter a building filled with boys. Uncle George tells Mitch that he'll ask Andrew if there's any room for Meghan at his business. Meghan walks around the "Internet Company" that only employs slacker-looking boys who goof off in the office all day. That's what you do at an "Internet Company," you see. Meghan walks up to the boy at the desk and says she's here for the interview. Homeboy has blonde frizzy hair and a sneer as he asks, "So, you're the famous Meghan?" And I fully expect her to say, "Of course I am! Do you doubt my power?" but she says, "No, I'm just the...regular Meghan." She's undercover. Frizz Boy laughs and drops the "creepy" vibe that all of the cool Internet Company kids do these days and walks her towards Andrew's office. Frizz Boy asks if Meghan really did follow Andrew to school every day for a full year. "I was a kid." "Oh, no." "It was my first crush; I thought that was what you were supposed to do." Frizz Boy laughs. "God, I can't believe he told you about that," Meghan exhales. This is a very awkward conversation, by the way. Frizz Boy says, "Yeah, well, he couldn't help it. People around here like to open up to me. I'm disarming." He walks off as Meghan gives the "Ooookay!" eye-roll.
Frizz Boy walks Meghan into an enormous office. "I'll call you back," Andrew says as he hangs up his phone. He jumps from his desk and pulls Meghan into a hug. They exchange "good to see you"s. He waves goodbye to Frizz Boy, who takes an exit. Meghan sits down and Andrew gets back behind his desk. Meghan asks if there are any other stories from her childhood that he's told everyone in the office. He apologizes and says he talks too much. "You look great," he says. "Thank you. Thank you." No return compliments from Meghan, of course. Andrew says that her parents were asking about a job for Meghan. "Yeah, I'm not even out of high school yet and already they're taking charge of my career," she says. By the way, the same song has been playing since the beginning of the episode. It's very dark in the office except for a big circular window at the top of the room (remember the hospital room?) which showers a shaft of white light onto Our Lady of Complete Martyrdom. She says that she hopes he doesn't feel forced into hiring her. Andrew leans in and puts on his best Bill Paxton to say, "Nothing could be further from the truth." Meghan smiles. The piano ends the endless song.
Mitch is talking to someone who I assume is supposed to be his accountant, because they are talking about money. They are discussing the hold-up from George's bank. The accountant tells him that he's running out of money. Mitch asks how much time he as left. "You ran out about an hour ago," his accountant tells him. Mitch says that he's known George for ten years and knows he'll come through. "He'd better, or..." "Yeah, I know." The accountant opens the door, sending a sharp beam of light onto Mitch's face (one drink). Overhead shot while the Testosterone Guitar pays an homage to Steve Vai. Mitch looks upwards towards the gods (one drink). Fade to white.