By Montykins
Mance Rayder's army has finally reached the Wall! It's seven hundred feet of vertical ice, so they spend almost the entire episode climbing it. Somewhat to my surprise, no one important falls to their death, although Orell does cut Jon and Ygritte free when there's a Wall-avalanche. When they reach the top, Ygritte takes a moment to enjoy the scenery on both sides. Then she has to stop appreciating the greenery because Jon wants to kiss her.
Walder Frey has sent envoys to tell Robb Stark that he'd be delighted to resume their alliance and contribute some troops to his cause, just as soon as Robb makes a public apology for not marrying his daughter. He also wants Edmure Tully to marry one of the Frey daughters, which Edmure objects to until the Blackfish threatens him. So everything's looking good on the Stark-Frey front.
Remember when Melisandre told Stannis she needed the "blood of a king" to do some magic? It turns out she was thinking of Gendry. So just as he's settling into his new role as the Brotherhood's blacksmith, Melisandre comes in with some soldiers and take him away in a cart. Arya is very angry about this.
In "barely in the episode" storylines, Meera and Osha are starting to hate each other and bicker over the correct way to skin a rabbit. Sam and Gilly are getting along much better on their flight back down to the Wall, although Gilly has to explain to him how to build a fire. And Theon is still getting tortured by a weirdo who won't explain who he is or why he's doing it.
The action in King's Landing is getting hotter, as Tyrion and Cersei put aside their differences to commiserate about the marriages they're about to be forced into. Olenna and Tywin have a meeting where Olenna tries to get out of marrying Loras to Cersei, and Tywin wins on points. Then Sansa has to be told that she's marrying Tyrion, and she doesn't take the news well. Finally, Varys and Littlefinger talk about what fun they have foiling each other's plans and it turns out that Littlefinger handed Ros over to Joffrey to play St. Sebastian. That means he killed her with crossbow bolts, if you're not up on your classical references.