Previously on Dark Angel: Max inserted the implant from the South African Goon Squad into her neck. Lydecker blackmails Tinga into giving herself up to save her child. Max promises to bring Tinga back. Brinn is reporting to Nana Visitor, who appears to be trying to double-cross Lydecker. Strange things are afoot at Manticore HQ, apparently. Tinga's in a big tank with tubes attached to her.
Just a meta-note: I'm going to call Cap'n EO "Logan" from now on, because it's easier to type. In case you were wondering. Which you probably weren't.
Logan is talking to Sebastian via computer, getting advice on how to fix up the exoskeleton that Crazy Camera Guy sent. Sebastian says that Logan needs a microchip that they can get in twelve to fourteen weeks from Singapore. Logan wants it sooner. Sebastian says that the same part can be found in robotic arms at nuclear reactors, and suggests that Max could steal one. Yeah, nuclear reactors are generally pretty lax on the security. Logan says that Max "is not on the loop on this little project," and Sebastian suggests that Logan lie to her. I have a question. Since Sebastian doesn't talk in the normal way, or have facial expressions at all, really, why do they need to have a video connection? Oh, so we at home know who the hell Logan is talking to. It just seemed weird to keep seeing Sebastian's blank face. Anyway, Max arrives just then, and Logan signs off quickly and covers up the exoskeleton. Max walks in and asks about a Chinese urn that's missing, and wonders if Logan sold it. Logan spins some story about Pierpont Lempkin wanting to sell a chip to the Taliban, and that Max has to steal the chip before Lempkin can get his hands on it. Max is unimpressed, but agrees to steal the chip. She feels hot, and removes her jacket while remarking that she thinks she might be coming down with something. Logan reminds her that it's been a year since Max broke into his apartment, which means it's been a year since they met, and he'd like to have dinner to celebrate. Max agrees, saying she could use "a little mirth in [her] life." Logan asks about Tinga, and Max reports that Zack found out they didn't take Tinga to Manticore, but they don't know where she is. Logan promises "an abundance of mirth and maybe a little surprise" at their dinner. All the teenage boys watching at home are like, "Is she in heat yet? Are they going to do it? Is she going to take her shirt off?" Simmer.
Max arrives home and lies down on her bed. Hey, I thought she didn't sleep. Max hears a noise and gets up. Some Manticore thugs are outside in the alley. She sneaks down and disarms the two thugs. She uses one of the guns to force Thug #2 into her apartment. She orders him to disrobe as some thump-thump music starts up. Ah, it's a dream. I get it. Max orders the naked thug to her bed, where she…look, I'm not going to tell you every move she makes. Use your imagination. At one point, Max looks up and the guy has turned into Logan, who tells her that it's a dream. A needle scratches on a record as the song stops and Max wakes up and realizes that she's in heat again. Oh, dear Lord.
Hey! Real credits! And they aren't that bad.
Max has just informed OC about her "estrus cycle," and that she gets an "uncontrollable craving" that happens "two, maybe three times a year." OC reiterates that it's because of Max's "feline DNA," and there's a bit of Men Are From Mars, Max Is From Manticore banter. OC suggests that Max just lock herself in a closet, and Max says that she tried that, but she ripped the doors off the hinges. Call me crazy, but couldn't she just masturbate? I mean, cats in heat do. Or so I've heard. It seems like that would help to take the edge off, anyway. Max asks OC to "smack [her] really hard right in the face" if she seems to get carried away. Max spots a guy lifting boxes in the alley and lusts over him, and OC threatens to smack her. Jessica Alba sounds like she's reciting lines she heard on a late-night phone-sex commercial, but then again, I'm not exactly the target audience for this scene.
Nana Visitor and Agent Sandoval walk in front of an official-looking building. Nana Visitor tells Agent Sandoval that they have to keep the "stealth drones" (a.k.a. The Simon) secret from the executive committee. Lydecker pops up and asks why he wasn't told about the executive committee meeting. Nana Visitor explains that the committee is pissed about Tinga's escape, and they blame Lydecker for it. Lydecker thinks that Nana Visitor is just covering her ass, since she was the one responsible. Nana Visitor claims that she made excuses for Lydecker, and he should thank her. She walks away. Zack watches from afar as Lydecker mutters, "Pissy little bitch."
At work, Max complains about the heat. Well, she thinks it's hot out, plus, you know, she's in heat. So it's both, really. OC advises her to go scratch her "itch," and notes that men don't have a problem separating love and sex. As an example, OC calls Sketchy over and proposes that they have sex, but never talk about it afterwards. Sketchy's all for it. OC considers her point proven, but of course Sketchy didn't know it was just theoretical until OC pushed him away. Wouldn't the fact that she's a lesbian clue him in? Then again, Sketchy is pretty dumb. Max doesn't think she can "just hit it with some guy," and points out her past mistakes of that genre. OC suggests that she hook up with Logan, but Max doesn't think that's a good idea because they're "not even like that." OC agrees to continue to help Max "beat this bitch." Just then, Max runs into (literally) the hot pizza boy (and "hot" describes both the boy and the pizza in this case). She goes all gooey until OC pulls her away.
Lydecker discusses Brinn's report regarding Tinga's "escape." Brinn claims that Tinga overpowered the soldiers guarding her and got away. Brinn was concerned with keeping control of the vehicle they were all riding in, and couldn't stop Tinga. Lydecker doesn't buy it. Lydecker points out that he made a deal to trade the life of the son for Tinga, and yet Brinn tried to capture the son and Max along with Tinga. Brinn says that "the scope of the mission was changed," and she assumed he was in the loop. Brinn lets Sandoval's name slip, and Lydecker dismisses her.
In their apartment, Max tells OC that there's nothing like an ice-cold shower to help her problem. What is she, Carmine Ragusa? Do cold showers really work in that situation? Max starts doing push-ups to burn off excess energy because she needs to sit in a car with Logan that night. OC asks if Logan knows about Max being in heat, and Max says that Logan is the "last person in the world" she would tell. OC asks how Max plans to control herself. Max starts talking about Logan's "scruffy beard, and those cute little glasses that make him look all sexy and intellectual." This talk forces Max to take another cold shower. There's a knock at the door. OC answers it to find Logan. How did he get up the stairs in his wheelchair? Do they have an elevator or something? Max shows up behind OC, all horny and shit, and OC tells Logan that Max will meet him downstairs and shuts the door. OC forces Max to do some more push-ups, like that's going to help. Seriously. Max. Get a vibrator.
Lydecker meets up with Zakes of the South African Goon Squad. Remember? Max has their implant in her neck, and they want her eggs to make an army of soldiers? Yeah, those guys. Anyway, Zakes says that his group is still interested in "pursuing a transgenic program, similar to Manticore," and proposes a deal. Lydecker isn't interested in Zakes's implant technology -- he thinks the Manticore kids are fine without them. Zakes pulls out a picture of Max, and says they can find her for Lydecker because they can trace her via the implant in her neck. In return, Zakes wants genetic data from early Manticore trials, and an "in vitro embryo." Lydecker agrees, but clarifies that he won't give them anything current. Zakes chuckles and says that they'll have Max in no time. Is Lydecker even authorized to make deals like this at this point?
Mmm, Vanilla Bean Coolatta. That is the cure for what ails you.
Did they explain last week how Logan got his car fixed, or a new car? I missed the episode, so I just read the recap. Well, anyway, Logan and Max are in the Aztek, and the windows are all fogged up. Apparently, they are scouting out the nuclear plant's security in preparation for Max's burglary run. Logan wonders why the windows are all fogged up. Max is all hot and bothered. The music starts up again as Max checks out Logan's profile, his mouth in particular. He turns to her and says, "Can you make out with me while we wait?" Max says dewily, "What?" Logan repeats, "Can you make out anything past the gate?" Needle scratching again. That has got to be the lamest, most overused piece of "comedy" on the FOX network, between this show and Ally McBeal. Max is busted out of her sexual reverie. Logan leans over to get something out of the glove compartment. Max can't take the proximity and hops out of the car, saying that she has to "get this thing over with." Logan looks after her, confused.
Max climbs up to the top of a metal bridge to get across it while avoiding security. She hides on top of an elevator to get to the correct floor. You know, I still have to believe that a nuclear reactor would have better security. Max puts on a white suit and helmet and grabs a Geiger counter. She approaches two guys working with the robotic arms and tells them that she's "doing a rad test." Her Geiger counter makes noises, and she asks the guys if either of them have been experiencing hair loss, then suggests that they get coffee while she figures out what's going on. The two guys gladly take off, and Max removes the chips Logan needs and slides them into plastic envelopes. It's nice that she can control her sexual feelings while she's inside the building. Based on what we saw earlier, you'd think she would have jumped one of those guys. As Max runs out, we see one guy telling the two guys from earlier that there are no "rad tests" scheduled, and then he spots Max and sounds the security alarms. Max super speeds on out of there, and ends up jumping into the water when she is cornered. Wouldn't the chips get wet? Are the plastic envelopes waterproof? Max returns to the car, dripping. Logan asks if she got the chips. Max makes a sarcastic remark about "a wet T-shirt contest" and hands over the chips, and then asks if they can go home now.
The day at work, OC comments that Max "made it home with her virtue intact." Max says that she has one more day of heat left, and she's supposed to have dinner with Logan for their anniversary. Max gets all worked up, and then decides that she needs to focus on "the task at hand," which is "delivering packages." Max grabs a package and starts off, but she runs into Hot Pizza Boy again. He says hello, and Max screams out, "Normal! I need to take a personal day!" Heh. Max barges into Normal's office where he is cleaning a spot from his shirt, and thus standing there in a tank top. The thump-thump music starts up, and Max is all scoping out Normal's body. She walks over, grabs him, and throws him up against the wall, kissing him. OC runs in and grabs Max, and then punches her in the face. Max thanks her. OC tells Normal that Max needs a personal day. Normal, stunned, tells her to "take a week." OC and Max walk out. Normal touches his face and chuckles to himself. I think I would like this show better if it had more Normal in it.
Sandoval comes into Lydecker's office and asks for authorization to release the files to the South Africans. Lydecker takes Sandoval's pen to sign the papers, and informs Sandoval that another agent will be handling the search for Max. Sandoval tries to protest, but Lydecker is having none of it. Lydecker signs the papers with the pen in his right hand, but then gives Sandoval his pen back using his left hand -- it's not Sandoval's pen, in other words. After Sandoval leaves, Lydecker holds up the original pen, in case you missed it.
Sandoval confers with Nana Visitor on Lydecker's behavior. Nana Visitor thinks that Lydecker is trying to "salvage his reputation with the committee." Nana Visitor orders Lydecker "contained," and Lydecker hears the whole thing using the pen/microphone that he slipped Sandoval. Nana Visitor orders Sandoval to set up The Simon to kill Lydecker, and hands Sandoval a picture of Lydecker to use. Lydecker, having heard the whole conversation, looks thoughtful instead of worried, like a normal person would be. I mean, it's The Simon! We've seen what those things can do!
At his pad, Logan puts the stolen chip in the exoskeleton. He stands up and walks. And grins.
Max and OC play sort-of Scrabble in their apartment, using dice and magnetic letters. Max thinks the worst of her situation is past as she uses the letters to spell out "hung." OC says a few more things about lesbians, because, you know, she is one. Max spells out "prick." ["Sounds like she's got Jackie Jr. advising her." -- Sars] OC shoots her a look, but Max doesn't see it. Max jiggles her foot and talks about being cooped up all day, and how she's looking forward to her anniversary dinner with Logan. OC stops the game and points out that Max has spelled "hung," "prick," and one that OC won't say because she kisses her mother with that mouth. Heh. Max realizes that the worst isn't over, but doesn't feel like she can cancel. OC says she has to either go to the dinner, or cancel.
Logan sets the table for dinner. It all looks very romantic. The phone rings. He walks over and answers it. It's Max, who cancels, saying, "Something came up." Logan kind of wants an explanation, but Max gets off the phone as quickly as possible. Logan looks sad.
Max tosses and turns in her bed, but Jessica Alba looks more over-caffeinated than horny. She tells OC that she's going out to ride her motorcycle, and she does just that. I hope she stops by the local equivalent of Good Vibrations and picks up something for her problem.
As Max pulls away on her motorcycle, Zakes pulls up in his Max-tracking van. They're starting their search there because they found out she made a pay-phone call from the area two weeks ago. Of course, if they'd been looking out the window, they would've seen her pull away. Tech Guy says that they can find her as long as she's in Sector Five. But of course, it will take a minute to "configure the antennas," which gives Max just enough time to reach the border to Sector Six. There's a minute of not-very-much-tension as Max waits at the border. Just as Tech Guy starts the search, Max uses her Jam Pony badge to budge to the head of the line. Thus, they don't find her in Sector Five -- she's now in Sector Six. Blah blah blah contrivance. They decide to search Sector Four .
Max rides along some highway. At a stoplight, another motorcycle pulls up -- it's Hot Pizza Boy. He recognizes her. They race along and end up at his apartment (I guess) getting naked. Max likes it rough. Cut to Max and Hot Pizza Boy in bed, after the big event. Hot Pizza Boy is asleep. Max sits there, looking guilty. She sneaks out. Cut to her sneaking back into her own apartment, where OC is asleep. Max pauses and looks guilty some more. She takes a cold shower and sobs. Except that to Jessica Alba, "sobbing" means "convulsing."
The morning, OC is trying to convince Max that what she did was not "wrong and bad," even if she now feels "cheap and empty." OC points out that Max loves Logan. Max claims they'd both be better off if they never met, and feels that it's "one hundred percent" her fault that Logan is in a wheelchair. Max thinks she should stay away from Logan, for his own good. OC reminds her that Logan doesn't seem to feel the same way. Max throws herself a pity party by pointing out that she had "sex with a total stranger" on her anniversary with Logan. You know, since she and Logan have never really discussed or even acknowledged their relationship, I think Max is in the clear here. Plus, that heat thing. Those are mitigating circumstances. OC agrees with me, and urges Max to face the reality of her relationship with Logan. OC once again points out that she's a lesbian, for those of you just tuning in.
Nana Visitor wonders why Lydecker isn't dead yet. She takes a call from Sandoval, who has set up a fake meeting with Lydecker and is now waiting for him to arrive. Nana Visitor is anxious to bring Max in. How come no one ever says goodbye on television? They always just hang up the phone. That's so rude. Zack watches as Nana Visitor gets into a car and drives away.
Lydecker shows up for his meeting with Sandoval. Sandoval hides so Lydecker can't find him at first. While looking for Sandoval, Lydecker sees The Simon outside the window, but doesn't look very concerned or surprised. Lydecker finds Sandoval as The Simon approaches. Lydecker dons a pair of glasses. The Simon finds him, but doesn't recognize him -- due to the glasses, I guess. That's some pretty lame technology. The Simon then focuses in on Sandoval, and recognizes him. Sandoval is confused, and Lydecker pulls out an ID with Sandoval's picture and Lydecker's name. So, Lydecker told The Simon the Sandoval was him. The Simon kills Sandoval. Lydecker removes his glasses as The Simon takes off.
Nana Visitor pulls up to Zakes's van and says that she's taking over the operation. Tech Guy tries to protest that Lydecker is in charge, but Nana Visitor isn't having it. She asks where Sandoval is. Lydecker shows up and says that he gave Sandoval time off. Nana Visitor is surprised to see Lydecker, and says that she just came by to get a progress report. Lydecker notes that she takes special interest in his "kids." Lydecker stares Nana Visitor down and gets into the van. Nana Visitor walks off. Go, Lydecker! Wait, am I supposed to be rooting for him?
Max arrives at Logan's pad. He jokes that she got her nights mixed up, and Max points out that when she broke in, it was after midnight, so technically it's still their anniversary. Logan offers her some cheap champagne. Boy, he really knows how to romance the ladies, that Logan. They sit in his living room, drinking champagne. Max launches into an explanation of why she couldn't come over the night before. She babbles about "phases" and "cycles" and "cat DNA" until finally the big light bulb goes on over Logan's head and he gets it. Max says, "So, that's why I decided not to come over, because…well, because." Oh, that explains everything. I can see why these two would have an honest and open relationship -- they communicate so well and never keep secrets from each other. Except that it's the opposite of that. Logan tells her it's no big deal. Max is still sad. Finally, she tells him about her romp with Hot Pizza Boy in so many words. Logan doesn't appear to be fazed by her admission, really, as Max goes on about how mad she is at Manticore for doing this to her, and how it makes her feel like she'll never get away from them.
Logan walks over and puts his arms around her. See that? Walks over. Max hugs him at first, not realizing, and suddenly it dawns on her that he's standing up. He shows her the exoskeleton. She asks why he didn't say anything, and he tells her that it was the surprise he referred to earlier. Max apologizes again for screwing everything up. Logan says, "You have nothing to be sorry for, or ashamed of. I know who you are." Just when you think they might kiss, the exoskeleton goes berserk and Logan falls on the ground, twitching. Logan is all pissed off. Max goes to him and says, "You've got nothing to be sorry for. Or ashamed of. It's never been about you walking. Not for me." I'll tell you what both of these two should be ashamed of -- ending so many sentences with prepositions. I guess in the future, grammar doesn't matter. Anyway, Max's statement has broken the tension, and they joke about how they are "pathetic," and "a couple of real head cases," and thus "made for each other." They share a look, and…kiss! Finally! A kiss! Logan breaks it off and suggests that they wait until Max is herself again, but Max replies that it "isn't Manticore," and they kiss some more. Until they are interrupted by Zack, who points out that he caught them at a bad time. But he doesn't look sorry. More like pissed. Zack snarks at Max, "You want to go save Tinga? Or has something more urgent come up?"
The van containing Zakes, Lydecker and Tech Guy rolls through the streets. Zakes notes that they have covered Sectors One thought Eight, and "everything south of Seneca." Lydecker expositions that all they have left is Sector Nine, which is "the high-rise district." I guess that's where Logan lives, huh?
Inside Logan's apartment, Zack is still snarking it up. He tells Max and Logan that he knows where Tinga is being held, and that he wants to rescue her tonight. Max gives Zack a look like, "Get lost for a minute," and Zack goes. Max tells Logan that she has to do this, for many reasons. Tinga is her sister. She can't let them do to Tinga what they did to Brinn. Max promised Tinga's kid that his mom would be back. Logan wants to help. He gives Max two earpieces and says he'll try to hack into surveillance to help her out in her mission. Max asks Logan if "this will wait," and Logan smiles and replies that they have "all the time in the world." Usually that means one or both of them are going to die. Will it mean that this time? Keep reading.
Inside the van, the Tech gets a blip on his radar screen, indicating Max's location. Lydecker grabs the phone and orders the troops mobilized. Helicopters and other military vehicles race into action. Max and Zack speed through the night on a motorcycle. They park and start walking, apparently unaware of the small army coming after them. Max gets Logan on her earpiece. Logan has some satellite photos of the facility where Tinga is being held, and tells them there is some cloud cover, but he can't see much security. Max and Zack creep towards the facility.
Lydecker continues to assemble his troops. Max and Zack take out some security guard. Zack offers Max a weapon, but she refuses it. He tries to force it upon her. She takes it. They split up, and as soon as Zack is out of sight, Max ditches the weapon. Zack and Max make their way into the facility as Lydecker gets his troops to form a perimeter around the outside. Max climbs to the top of a silo, and then uses a zip wire to fly down the inside, kind of like Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible when he was all suspended inches above the floor. Max makes her way to the room where Tinga is being held, taking out guards as necessary. Max finally gets to Tinga's tank, and just stands there, staring. Meanwhile, Zack has been fighting off security guards with his gun, but he takes a bullet to the leg. Logan is still staring at his computer screen, and the cloud cover starts to break apart, revealing Lydecker's army surrounding the base. Logan tries to warn Max and Zack. Lydecker enters the facility and notices that the guards are "Manticore special ops." Lydecker asks a soldier, "Under whose command is this location being guarded?" The soldier says that he doesn't know. Lydecker is confused, but forges on. Zack has somehow gotten outside the facility, and is waiting in cover. Logan keeps telling Max to get out of there. Max picks up a chair and shatters the tank holding Tinga. All the water floods out, and Max catches Tinga's body. Um, Tinga's looking pretty dead here. Lydecker and his soldiers rush in. Lydecker seems shocked to see Max and Tinga there, as well as upset about Tinga's condition -- that is, dead. The soldiers train their guns on Max. Logan keeps shouting, "Max? What's going on?"
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