Previously: Sarah does not love Chuck.
Big Mike is looking for Chuck. Chuck is looking for Sarah. Morgan is looking for his dignity. Chuck is reliving his kiss with Sarah while Morgan makes out with Anna on the counter. The kissing makes me relive my lunch. Morgan invites Anna to Chuck's house for Thanksgiving, but she is not sure she wants to go, because Morgan is in love with Ellie. Big Mike gathers the troops and warns them that Black Friday is nigh, and Buy Mart has to be ready! Sarah enters the store, and Chuck is excited, because she hasn't been returning his calls. He won't let her speak and launches into a speech about The Kiss and getting back together and whatnot. She tells him Bryce is alive. Probably not the response he was looking for.
Bryce is alive. The very much (okay, make that somewhat) alive Bryce is being incarcerated in a CIA medical ward. He looks like Luke Skywalker after he was rescued from the ice land of Hoth and is floating in his underwear in a tube of water. Except Bryce isn't in his underwear. Or floating in a tube of water. It's more of an overall impression of Skywalkerness. Moving on. Chuck, Sarah, and Casey are outside the room staring at Bryce. Chuck wants answers, but Sarah and Casey can't give him any, because Bryce won't talk to them; he will only talk to Chuck. Chuck goes in despite Casey's warnings that Bryce is a trained CIA assassin. Bryce doesn't believe it's really him, and he wants to know what they did with the real Chuck. That makes Chuck want to leave. Bryce wants proof that Chuck is the real Chuck. And that proof? Klingon. That's right, people, it's the scene you've been waiting for. The scene you knew would be coming. You just thought it would be coming from Morgan. Bryce says something to Chuck. Chuck is as embarrassed, as he should be, and he doesn't want to respond in Klingon in front of his potential girlfriend, because outside of Comicon, Klingon language skills rarely get you laid. He finally responds, and Bryce laughs. He plays nice just long enough to get Chuck leaning in close, break free from his restraints, grab a scary eighteenth-century (motto: scare the patients before they scare you!) injector thingy, and hold Chuck hostage in order to get out of the room.
Casey and Sarah bust in, and Bryce doesn't understand why Sarah is holding a gun on him. Seriously, girlfriend, where's your loyalty? Since Chuck's brain is so important, Sarah and Casey have to let them go, and Sarah gives Bryce the access code to get onto the elevator. Once on the elevator, Bryce lets Chuck go and says he wouldn't really have done it, but Chuck is rightfully skeptical. Bryce realizes the elevator is slowing down and grabs Chuck again. The door opens to reveal a man in a suit whose scarred face causes Chuck to have a flash onto some gruesome-looking murder scene. Poor Man's Scarface says hi to Bryce and gives him a chance to make up and be best friends forever. Bryce looks horrified at the thought, and Scarface is offended. He asks Bryce if he is going to run, and Bryce nods. Chuck wants to know who that was, but Bryce says it was nobody. Chuck reminds Bryce about the supercomputer currently residing in his brain. "Nobody" doesn't cut it. He wants to know: what is Fulcrum? Who is that guy? What's going on? Bryce replies, "Chuck, this is going to sting a little." And he shoots him chock-full of tranquilizers. Bryce leans over Chuck and asks him to "tell Sarah it's hard to say goodbye." Oh Bryce, don't you know to say it with flowers? Chuck passes out on the floor of the elevator, and Bryce makes his escape. Sarah and Casey find a looped-out Chuck making out with the elevator floor. He tries to pet Sarah, but when Casey gets close, he screams, "Not pretty! Not pretty!" Which totally reminds me of the guy I saw on the subway the other day who was jumping up and down on the platform yelling "Ugly! Ugly! Ugly!" and pointing at some poor woman who is undoubtedly going to need a lot of therapy.
Sarah returns the still-loopy Chuck to his apartment. Chuck wants to know if Sarah and Casey are going after Bryce, but Sarah reminds Chuck that he is her assignment, not Bryce. Chuck thinks its ridiculous to pretend that the plot of this show would progress if they didn't go after Bryce. He also wants to know how Bryce's return will affect their fake relationship. Ellie interrupts their conversation by returning to the apartment. She seems surprised to see Chuck and Sarah talking, since they broke up and all, but that doesn't stop her from inviting Sarah to Thanksgiving. I would be so pissed at my sister if I had a sister. I mean, I would be really pissed at my imaginary sister if she invited my ex-girlfriend to dinner without running it by me first. Sarah accepts the invitation.
Now to the subplot du jour: Since Harry Tang has been disappeared, Big Mike has no choice but to put Morgan in charge of the store's preparations for Black Friday. Obviously, this involves a dry run of catastrophic retail experiences, a pantomime of Who Moved My Cheese: The Clerk's Edition, and some strained managerial oversight by Morgan. It also appears to be Thanksgiving, yet everyone is at the store. They sure are dedicated employees, despite the fact that they never work. The unresponsiveness of the employees to Morgan's flailing attempt at emulating Jack Welch brings about discussions of the word "pineapple." A word that will apparently be used later in this episode as some undoubtedly slightly asinine plot device. The magically fruity word will magically empty the store. Keep that in mind, will ya?
It's Thanksgiving, and everyone is there! Even Casey! Why the heck not? Ellie is serving up a big turkey and all the fixings. This would all look great and warm and semi-appealing if Thanksgiving hadn't been five days ago and oh my god if I look at another green bean casserole, I am going to hurl. And don't even get me started on the turkey. Before Casey goes to help stuff the turkey (after it's been cooked, mind you), Casey informs Chuck that he killed Bryce. And he would do it again! Chuck tells Ellie that Morgan is bringing a girl, and Ellie is revolted and intrigued all at the same time. The doorbell rings, so Chuck doesn't have time to warn Ellie that Anna knows Morgan is in love with her and will be acting like a jealous twelve-year-old all night...sigh. I had high hopes for Anna. In order to prove her love for Morgan, Anna sends Chuck out for marshmallows to top Ellie's sweet potatoes.
On his marshmallow run, Chuck spots Bryce lurking in the shadows outside his apartment. (Do you think spy school offers majors in lurking? Or is it just an elective?) Bryce can't figure out why Chuck is living there. With his sister. He doesn't understand what happened to Chuck. Chuck reminds Bryce that Bryce framed him and got him kicked out of Stanford. Bryce ignores that and asks Chuck to bring Sarah out. Chuck won't help him without a good reason. Bryce says that Chuck should help him because Scarface works for Fulcrum, and Fulcrum wants the Intersect. And, Chuck? That's you. The bad guys are called Fulcrum? It sounds like some middling metal-ish rock band started by pimply high-schoolers in the drummer's garage. Can't you just imagine the awesome patch the guitar players kid sister would design? Fulcrum! Chuck returns to the table, and while Casey is distracted by Captain Awesome groping his muscles (HoYay!), Chuck sends Sarah an encoded message that Bryce is waiting in his bedroom for her. If by "encoded," you mean "said out loud and really enunciated." Chuck so obviously did not study codes in spy school. Sarah (always the professional) gets the message and goes to meet Bryce. Bryce informs her that he is not armed, he is not a rogue spy, and she is in love with him. They make out a bit. I avert my eyes a bit.
Back at the table, Captain Awesome is trying to get Casey to go on a whitewater rafting trip with him. The brochures are in Chuck's room, so Chuck goes to get them. He gets there just in time to see the super-spy make-out session. He is not thrilled. Very not thrilled. And when it is his turn to say what he is thankful for, he is thankful that Bryce Larkin is dead and not making out with his girlfriend in the bedroom. Did you get that? That was an encoded message to Casey. Casey totally got it, since he took that class in spy school and has that nifty NSA training. As all the other people at the table scratch their heads, Casey bursts in on the make-out session, and Bryce flees.
Meanwhile, Ellie has topped the sweet potatoes with marshmallows, and Morgan has piled them on his plate. He proceeds to make out with the poor yams until Anna is so horrified and jealous that she flees the room, yelling that Ellie can have him. Ellie is confused and grossed out and announces that she doesn't want any more family dinners. Captain Awesome suggests a "destination Christmas." Heh!
Casey, Sarah, and Chuck have not returned to the table and are instead looking for Bryce. Who is in Casey's apartment, hacking his computer. Sarah draws her gun and Bryce draws his, and they point at each other for a while, which is a pretty serious turnabout from, oh, five minutes ago, when they were sucking face. Bryce tells her again that he's not rogue and that taking down the Intersect was an inside job planned by Fulcrum! Fulcrum! is some double-secret part of the CIA that ordered the job because they had plans for the Intersect's information. Bryce sent the info to Chuck because he needed a friend who wasn't a spy and wouldn't know anything about Fulcrum! (Fulcrum!), Intersect, or Sand Wall. At the mention of Sand Wall, Chuck has another flash. He tells Sarah that Bryce might be telling the truth. Casey walks into the conversation, sees Bryce, and shoots him in the chest. Chuck faints. But obviously, Bryce is not dead. He is smartly wearing a bulletproof vest (motto: Sleeve-Free Since '73! Seriously, are sleeves too much to ask for?) As both Bryce and Chuck are revived, Bryce starts to tell his story. After sending Chuck the Intersect files, he ran into Casey, who shot him. He woke up in an ambulance with Scarface asking to know where the files were. Bryce told him that the files were in him. So Fulcrum! (Fulcrum!) saved him in order to retrieve the files. He is willing to go to the CIA, but he needs to know it is real CIA, not Fulcrum! (Fulcrum!) Chuck can help with that. If he flashes on whomever they send, it is Fulcrum! (Fulcrum!), and if not, it's safe. And where is the deal going to go down? Oh, where the heck do you think?
Big Mike is preparing the troops for battle. But no, not battle, because if it were a battle, he would tell them to run. But this is Buy More. The customers are already sniffing at the door on the trail of big discount prices and the sweet smell of super-sales. Big Mike barricades himself in his office and leaves his team to fend for themselves. Ah, management. As the madness of Americans engaging in the most meaningful and nostalgic of all holiday activities unfurls around them, Anna tells Morgan that he failed her test (okay, I know you don't care, but I have a duty to report these things), while Sarah and Bryce enter the store for the CIA pickup. Chuck checks out the CIA agents sent to retrieve Bryce, and when he doesn't flash on either agent, he gives the transfer the all-clear. Big Mike reports that the cash registers are down, but all of the Nerd Herders are hiding under the counter. Morgan gives the only guy old enough to know how to fix the cash registers (they're from the '80s!) a pep talk about the store exploding, and all is well again. Amidst the chaos, Bryce and Chuck make amends. Bryce apologizes for mocking Chuck for living with his sister and working at Buy More. He's sort of jealous or something. Aw, poor little spy. Sarah looks pleased by the Chuck-Bryce handshake of friendship and gives Chuck a little smile as she leads Bryce away.
Heading to CIA headquarters, Bryce and Sarah have a moment alone in the back of a car. Instead of shoving his tongue down her throat, Bryce wants to talk about his feelings. Geez, he's such a girl. Sarah explains that she thought he was dead, which is definitely an encoded message meaning, "I made out with someone else." Bryce asks her to come back with him, but she has her assignment. Bryce tries to get her to talk about her feelings some more, but a car accident saves her from having to share.
Back at the Buy More, Scarface has come to do some early shopping for items on his Christmas list. First on his list? A computer. Specifically, the Intersect. While Fulcrum! (Fulcrum!) reacquires Sarah and Bryce from their car accident, Scarface tells Chuck that he will do anything and everything to complete his mission, including killing all the civilians bargain-shopping at Buy More. He points out the seven trained assassins he has around the store and shows that Casey has already been taken captive. Scarface starts to walk Chuck out of the store, but the Nerd Herder who went to fix the registers stops them. Seems that he can't make the repair and doesn't know what to do. Scarface threatens that if Chuck says more than one word, he will kill them all. So what word does Chuck say? Oh what the heck do you think he says! "Pineapple"! As the letters trip off his lips, the Nerd Herder springs into action. He finds Morgan, who, when he hears that the message came from Chuck, hops on the old megaphone (standard issue in the retail world!) and clears the store. Anna pulls the fire alarm, and in the melee, Casey breaks free, grabs Chuck, and armors up in the home theater room. Meanwhile, Sarah and Bryce have managed to free themselves from their captives and have made their way back to the Buy More. They kick a whole heck of a lot of bad-spy ass, and finally, the store is empty. Casey takes Chuck out of the home theater armory and immediately gets cold-cocked by Scarface. Scarface uses Chuck as a human shield between him and Bryce and Sarah. Bryce starts jabbering at Chuck in Klingon (in public! again!) and then shoots him in the chest. As Chuck falls, Casey sneaks up behind Scarface and returns the cold-cocky favor. As Chuck is obviously not dead, Sarah asks Bryce what he said to Chuck. Bryce asked him if he was wearing the vest, and he was! That was really convenient. As Chuck whinges about how much getting shot hurts even when there is a bulletproof vest involved, the NSA shows up in response to Casey's call for backup. They are all dressed like firefighters, which is also really convenient.
Outside, Big Mike is about to murder Morgan for emptying the store. Doesn't the little gnome know that it is the biggest shopping day of the year? Doesn't he? Doesn't Big Mike know that the cash registers were down and they weren't making any money anyway? C'mon, people, focus! An NSA agent masquerading as a fireman interrupts Big Mike's rant. The fireman tells Big Mike that there was a gas leak in the store, and whoever emptied the store saved a lot of lives. Morgan is not fired...sigh. As the NSA cleaners get the Buy More back in order, Bryce gives his report to the generals in the home theater. He comes out dressed to the nines in a tux. He is going undercover (no, not as a maitre d') to take down Fulcrum! (Fulcrum!) The Bryce they knew is dead. He's going deep. He won't be back. Chuck asks where he is going and what he will be doing. Um, mindfart? He just said he was going deep under cover. Why's he going to tell you where he's going? Bryce says goodbye to Sarah and tells her that they'll always have Omaha. Is that Band Of Horses in the background? Weird.
Chuck knocks on Casey's door and invites him over for leftovers. Casey is busy pruning his bonsai, but Chuck won't leave until he gets some answers. Specifically, what the heck was that Omaha business all about? Casey explains that it was a contact point or something. Sarah needs it, because if Bryce is going deep and Sarah wants to go with him, she has to go now. Somehow, Omaha has something to do with this. As Casey slams the door in his face, Chuck looks worried. He can't even indulge in the turkey sandwiches that Morgan, Ellie, and Awesome are eating. Ugh, I can't even look at them! No more turkey! No more sweet potatoes, no more cranberry sauce, no more stuffing. No more! The show ends in Sarah's hotel room. Bryce is calling on one phone; Chuck is calling on the apparently government-issued iPhone. Sarah can't decide which to answer.