The Chenbot tells me that it's Double Eviction Night! Holy moly, are my typing fingers going to get a workout. Things are happening! And hopefully one of those things is the elimination of Boogie! Let's go!
After the previouslies, we get a live shot of the hamsters while Julie explains that either Boogie or Jenn is going home tonight. Let's take a moment to discuss Boogie's outfit. First, I need to remind you that, for the Season 2 finale, Boogie wore a custom baby blue basketball uniform that said Chilltown on it. And proposed to Krista. That must never be forgotten. If you ever start to feel sympathy for Boogie, just remember that happened and you will throw up ten times and then hate him again. So tonight, Boogie is wearing madras shorts, a gray button-down, a pink blazer with the sleeves rolled up revealing a gray patterned cuff, glasses, and a white hat. Can you believe that he put that ensemble together, looked in the mirror, and went, "Yeah, that's it." I mean, what? What is wrong with his brain? So, so much.
But back to the double elimination. Here's the skinny. Eviction, quick HOH, immediate nomination for eviction, POV competition, and second eviction. All in an hour! Hey, got to give props for Julie's cute mod trapeze dress. The side ponytail in her hair isn't the greatest, but she looks cute overall.
When last we saw our hamsters, Jenn was the replacement nominee after Frank took himself off the block. And Boogie refused to shake Dan's hand, like a child. Jenn vows in the DR that she's NOW going to become a force to be reckoned with. Girl, you are in no danger. Calm the fuck down. Frank DRs that he knows Jenn is a pawn but they need to get votes.
Boogie goes off to pout in the bedroom, bitching to Frank that he hates Shane and that Dan's a piece of shit for jerking them around. It's good to remember that Boogie has never manipulated or lied about his alliances in the house. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! Ian comes in and weirdly pretends like he might not vote for Boogie to stay? Boogie panics and Ian reasserts that he's going to keep Boogie, but that he hates to vote out Jenn too. Boogie calms down and asks Ian to do whatever he can to help Boogie secure votes; Ian says he will. Frank thinks it's doable to keep Boogie.
Boogie's sulking around the house and making things awkward for everyone. Britney has to leave the room because it's so uncomfortable. Boogie finally asks Shane why he jerked them around and pretended he was going to nominate Dan. Shane says it wasn't his intention to make anyone look foolish. This is Shane's best defense at this point; say that he's doing what he has to do to go further in the game, and it's nothing personal. Frank actually tells Shane to "stuff [his] sorries in a sack" like who talks like that? And Boogie accuses Shane of being Dan's bitch.
In the room, Britney, Danielle and Ashley can hear the whole thing going down and they're shocked that Boogie is being such a dick. Really? You're shocked? Have you watched any of his seasons? Shane says he's not worried and Boogie says that he should be. Why is Shane even engaging with him? Just walk away, dude. Boogie vows that Shane will be in trouble unless Dan wins HOH (or Britney, Danielle, or Ian). Frank agrees, and Boogie has to get one last parting shot in at Dan while walking out of the room. So sad, Boogie. Cry me a freaking river, you loser.
Dan is lying silently on the couch, reading something. I thought they weren't allowed reading material? Is it a Bible? Or the rule book? Boogie sits near him along with Frank, Jenn, and Ian. Boogie asks Dan if he's going to ignore him all week, and Dan says he's not ignoring him. Boogie keeps needling, and asks Jenn if she wonders why she was nominated instead of one of the other floaters, and suggests she ask Dan, since he was the architect. Dan wisely keeps his mouth shut, and then tells us in the DR that he doesn't mind taking the heat for Ian, but he hopes Ian appreciates what's happening. Boogie wants to talk Dan's endgame strategy but Dan claims he hasn't thought that far ahead. Boogie's final request is that Dan avoid screwing Ian over, because Frank can handle himself but Ian's not ready for battle. Oh, this is rich. RICH!
Jenn tells Ian that she's pissed and she's going kamikaze. You know, she keeps vowing to get fired up but she's not actually doing anything other than following Boogie around and listening. Anyway, then she goes to visit Shane who assures her that she's not going home, and that he had to put up someone to replace Frank, but she shouldn't worry. I always get nervous when people use pawns. It so rarely works out for the pawn. Anyway, Jenn then goes on the Shane Trashing tour, telling anyone who will listen that she's pissed and she's going to remember this if she's on the jury. Ian DRs that Jenn is a huge pawn and she needs to chill out or the whole thing might blow up. Please.
Julie returns and tells everyone that it's a double eviction. No one seems surprised. She adds that tonight's second evictee will become the first jury member, and no one is surprised by that either. Ugh, this is my least favorite part, where the nominees get to plead their case. Jenn says she's enjoyed her time in the house, and she hopes people will vote for her to stay due to her loyalty. Boogie thanks his business partner before his family, and then asks Joe for his vote and begs him to do the right thing in front of his family. Oh, this is going to be good.
Let the voting begin! Ashley evicts Jenn. Britney evicts Boogie. Joe evicts Boogie. JOE! Look at you! Ha ha. Frank evicts Jenn, obviously. Dan evicts Boogie, and says he's doing it for Janelle. I might be rooting for Dan, y'all. Ian evicts Boogie. It's official!!!!!!! I am dancing on my couch. Danielle evicts Boogie.
I am seriously so excited for Boogie to find out the vote. Julie tells him that it's 5-2 and he's blank-faced but you can see behind his eyes that he's confused by the numbers. He was expecting Ashley, Joe, Ian and Frank to vote for him, so it should have been 4-3 in his favor. Ian hugs Boogie and gives him something (sunglasses?) and whispers something. Boogie tells everyone to play a good game and then whispers to Frank that Ian is not to be trusted, like Frank didn't know that.
And now the Chenterview. Julie asks what Ian whispered to him, and Boogie says that Ian said Boogie might not like some of what he sees, and then referenced when Boogie told Howie to "Get to steppin'" as he was evicted from All-Stars. Boogie deduced that Ian might be playing for the other side. He adds that he obviously doesn't know what happened behind his back, but he tried to look out for Ian and if Ian betrayed him, that just reflects poorly on Ian. Except that betraying Boogie is kind of a badge of honor.
And now the Goodbye Videos. Frank says he wishes he could have kept Boogie around. Britney fucking rules. She does the whole Chilltown phone conversation thing, and pretends that Janelle is calling for Boogie but he's been evicted, then laughs. The audience claps and hoots and even Boogie has to laugh. Dan say he respected Boogie and wanted to work with him, and wasn't the one who ratted him out. Cut to Ian confessing that he masterminded Boogie's demise, and that he learned from the best. Boogie is stunned, and laughing. This is one of the most satisfying evictions ever, although it might be slightly more satisfying if Boogie wasn't chuckling about it. The audience and Boogie applaud, and Boogie tips his cap to Ian. Boogie says he's proud of Ian and laughs over the name Quack Pack. And that's the end of Boogie.
Time for the HOH competition. It's a Before/After where Julie names two events and they have to determine the order. First one is, "Did they dress up as lemons and limes before or after Baby Zingbot was born?" It's like they're talking another language. Anyway, the answer is Before and Ashley is eliminated. I don't know where she went when she stepped down but she's walking all over the place while they answer the question and it cracked me up. , "Was Willie expelled from the game before or after Janelle won her first Coach's Competition?" I can't believe they referenced Willie. Usually they like to sweep that shit under the rug. Anyway, the answer is After, and Joe, Jenn and Dan are eliminated. Way to catch fire, there, Jenn.
question: "Did the Breaking News Bulletins keep them up all night before or after Jo Jo hosted a competition?" There was someone on this show named Jo Jo? The answer is After and due to a last-minute answer switch, Frank is eliminated. Now it's down to Britney, Danielle, and Ian so the Quack Pack is in power no matter what. question: "Was the game reset before or after the Have Nots got candy canes and cod?" It's Before, and they all got it right. , "During his eviction speech, did Wil say 'I love you and adore all of you' before or after he said, 'This is a win-win situation." It's After, and Britney is eliminated.
We're down to Danielle and Ian and they're doing a number question: "How many seconds did it take for the Lime team to win the Ex-Squeeze me competition from the start horn to the finishing bell?" Again, are they speaking English? Danielle says 1200 and Ian says 1000. The answer is 419, so Ian wins and he's the HOH. Ian quickly huddles with Danielle, Dan, and Britney but Julie orders them back in the house so they all run inside quickly. It's going to be Frank and someone, right? Frank and Jenn? Frank and Joe? We'll find out after the break.
Julie lets us listen on some last-minute strategizing. Ian and Joe are talking privately and it seems like they make a deal for Joe to not be nominated and Joe guarantees Ian's safety. Ian apologizes like a million times and then nominates Frank and Ashley. Ian is all fired up and nervous. Julie reminds Frank and Ashley that they could still win POV. Is Ian still trying to keep up his ruse of being on Frank's team? Give it up, dude.
When we return, they're set up for POV. Competing tonight are Frank, Ashley, Ian, Joe, Danielle, and Shane -- the extras were chosen during the break. They're standing on a giant rainbow, with each in his or her own color lane. They have to run down the lane and search for two clovers in a ball pit, put them on a podium, run back and get the veto symbol, put it on the podium, and hit the buzzer. Ian finds his first clover and goes back to search for the second before anyone else has even found one. Frank gets his first clover, and then Joe. Danielle and Shane are . Frank finds his second clover. Well, he won. He gets the veto symbol and hits the buzzer, so he wins. He yells something at Ian that I couldn't quite decipher, but I don't think it was, "I love you, man!" As we go to break, Frank continues to taunt Ian. He might want to tone that down. Who is that helping?
I'm weirdly rooting for Frank, even though he allied with Boogie, my nemesis. I like an underdog, what can I say? And at least he's actively fighting to stay in the game, and has saved his own bacon more than once. Unlike Jenn or Ashley or any of the floaters. [Note: Every time that Frank did something successful in the POV, the entire studio audience booed. Guess who Pandora's Box is probably going to screw over week? -- Rachel.]
Frank pulls Britney and Shane into a bedroom and it's tough to hear their whispered conversation but it's something about putting up Joe and that Frank is still going after Dan but he's willing to work with Britney and Shane. Joe also hurt his knee during the POV competition so it would be a real pisser for him if he got voted out now.
At the POV ceremony, Julie has to ask Ian to sit down because he's pacing around. Frank says he's going to use the POV on himself, obviously. Ian names Joe as his replacement nominee, and apparently Joe was chosen to play POV to try to save himself, and he failed. Well, that explains why he was hauling ass so hard.
After yet another break, Ashley and Joe get to plead their cases. Ashley looks defeated. Ashley says it's been rough and the house is divided, but she knows she's not articulate enough to argue her case she devolves into whining that she thought Ian had her back. But she voted with Boogie and Frank and Joe voted with the Quack Pack, so it's kind of hopeless, and she knows it. Joe stands up and motions that he loves them, they should evict Ashley, and keep him. He does all this without words and for the first time, I actually like Joe. I think it's because he wasn't yelling.
Time to vote! Jenn evicts Ashley. [Note: SUPER bitterly.] Shane evicts Ashley. Britney evicts Ashley and she's crying. Frank evicts Joe. Danielle evicts Ashley. So Ashley's going home. Dan evicts Ashley. Julie tells them that Ashley is evicted. She looks like she's about to fall asleep. How many drugs is she on, exactly? And how do I get them? Because I've got this insomnia problem and she looks like she could fall asleep at any time with no problem. Everyone hugs Ashley goodbye and applaud her when she leaves. She also gets a huge reaction from the studio audience. She hugs Julie and says, "I love your side pony." Ashley's hilarious.
Back in the house, Frank is walking around bitching about how they sent Ashley home and he can't believe how people are hiding behind other stronger players. He needs to shut up. I'm not rooting for him anymore.
Time for the Chenterview. Julie asks Ashley why she thinks she's sitting there instead of Joe. Ashley says she made the house mad because she was a floater without a team, and then she joined up with Frank, Ian, and Boogie finally, but she made the wrong move. She's sweet, but not so bright, huh? Anyway, that's it for tonight's whirlwind. Back to your regularly scheduled weecapper.